January Dreams

by Carrigan Richards

  “It’s strange.”

  “Next year, we’re going to make it awesome. You, Vincent or Casper, Luke, and me will have so much fun. Oh! We should totally go to the beach house this summer.”

  “Yeah.”

  Beach house with Casper sounds amazing. Ugh. I need to stop.

  “How did you convince your parents to let you out tonight?”

  “I have be home by ten.”

  She gasps. “What! Do they think things like that can only happen late at night? This is prom! Ugh.”

  “Mom’s overprotective. She also doesn’t want me to have sex. She thinks if we go to dinner, then prom, then go home, we won’t have time.”

  “Oh, you can make time.” She gives a wicked grin.

  I roll my eyes. I was supposed to take the next level with Vincent tonight. Butterflies swarm inside my stomach. I feel their wings fluttering throughout my entire body. I try focusing on the lady filing my nails, but all I can think of is Casper soft lips on mine.

  “Whoa. Are you okay? You look a little sick.”

  “I’m fine.”

  She lets out a frustrated sigh. “Tell me what’s up.”

  “Casper kissed me,” I blurt.

  She gasps again. “Oh. My. God.” We sit in silence for a moment. “When? How was it? What are you going to do?”

  “I don’t know!” My vision blurs. “It was yesterday. I can’t stop thinking about it. Or him. Cherry, I’m in love with him.”

  “Oh wow.”

  “I have to break up with Vincent.”

  “Tonight?” she asks in disbelief.

  “I can’t. Tomorrow. I don’t know. I love Vincent. I don’t want to hurt him.”

  “Megan,” she says, and I turn to face her. “Don’t force yourself to be with someone if you don’t want to. Life is short. You love Casper and I know this would tear you up inside if you ignored those feelings. It’s been tearing you up for months.”

  She’s right. I know I can’t fight this anymore. It’s not fair to Vincent or me. I’m only seventeen. How can I feel this way about someone? How can I hurt Vincent’s feelings like this? I’m doing exactly what the Megan in my dreams did. She broke Vincent’s heart because of loving Casper. I can’t get over how similar my dreams are compared to real life. Am I psychic or something? Are the dreams making us feel this way?

  My hands shake as I try to pin the stupid boutonniere to Vincent’s lapel. I can barely meet his eyes. But he looks hot in his tuxedo and I can feel his dark blue eyes on me. The right side of my neck is hot from all of my curled hair being swept to one side. I curse aloud as the pin pokes my finger.

  Vincent holds my hands steady and brings my finger to his mouth, sucking on it. I feel the blush coming a mile away, and this is too intimate considering Mom is in the other room getting her phone camera ready. I remove my finger and finally pin the flower.

  I take a deep breath.

  “Are you okay?” he asks.

  I swallow hard. “Yeah. I’m good.” I’m such a terrible liar, hoping he can’t tell the real reason for my nervousness. He told me last night he had a surprise for me, and he wants to make tonight special. I can’t help but wonder if he means he wants to take our relationship to the next level. I know I can’t give him what he wants. He grabs my hand and intertwines his fingers with mine giving me a squeeze.

  “Okay, get in front of the fireplace,” Mom orders and proceeds to take a million pictures of us.

  “I can’t believe you were able to find a date,” Ron jokes as he stands behind Mom.

  I feel Vincent tense and I squeeze his hand. I’ve learned to ignore Ron’s dumb comments, but it still hurts.

  “Vincent stand behind Megan and put your hands on her hips. Megan stand in front of him and turn toward me.” We do what she says, and I smile, but it’s fake. I’m trying so hard to be in the moment, but I can’t stop thinking about that damn kiss. From that one kiss, I know that what I feel for Vincent is small compared to what I felt yesterday.

  “Be home no later than ten,” Mom says and hugs me. “Be careful,” she whispers.

  “I’ll be fine.”

  “You kids have fun.”

  Vincent opens the door and I gasp. There’s a limo sitting in my driveway. “Vincent,” I hesitate. He spent way too much.

  “Come on. It’s fine.” The driver nods, opening the back door for us and once we’re in, Vincent leans over and kisses me. His lips trail to my jawline to the back of my ear. “You are gorgeous, Megan,” he whispers, and my heart immediately goes into overdrive. He kisses me, his tongue mingling with mine and he presses harder like he can’t get enough.

  I feel sick, knowing I don’t deserve any of this. He holds me so close to him, as if he’s afraid I might run away. I decide if I want to rid my mind completely of Casper, I should give myself to Vincent. All of me. But I can’t bring myself to do it.

  “Are you sure you’re okay?” Vincent asks, squeezing my hand. I loosen my hold, unknowing that I had been gripping that hard. He lifts my chin with his other hand, and I gaze into his eyes.

  “Yeah, I’m fine.”

  “Talk to me.” His voice is so soothing, and it almost brings me to tears. I have to come up with something.

  “My mom and dad are fighting again,” I lie. They tend to fight often over child support or whatever, but it’s been a while. I hope he buys it.

  He pulls me tighter and kisses my forehead. “You won’t have to worry about that much longer. I promise.”

  I look up into his blue eyes. “What do you mean?”

  “You’ll be going to college soon, right?”

  Oh. “Yeah. I hope. After this semester of being sick and skipping, I hope I can do well on my exams to keep my GPA up.”

  “You’ll be fine, Megan. I promise everything will work out.”

  He sounds so sure. He takes me to an upscale French restaurant. I can’t get over the coincidence, but I remember his family originated from France. Is that why my dreams take place there? Something isn’t right. It’s unsettling and I can’t stand this feeling. During dinner, Vincent is incredibly charming as usual, and he acts so happy. So, in love. It’s crushing me.

  We arrive at the ancient theatre, where the prom takes place. I’ve always loved this theatre for its architecture. It was built in the late twenties and the renovation kept its beautiful charm and warm atmosphere. The chandeliers hang low and light glitters throughout them. We enter the ballroom and it’s decorated in blue and silver.

  Cherry and Luke meet up with us and I was right. Cherry owns the prom with her beautiful gown, fit for a queen. Her brown curls are pulled up high with one long curl hanging loosely. Her eye makeup brings out the blue in her eyes. She gives me a knowing look and the four of us head to the dance floor. While the music isn’t exactly my favorite, Vincent and I dance to almost every song. I enjoy every minute, and it keeps my mind off of things.

  He makes me smile and I’m so lucky to have him. I love Vincent, but I can’t escape this stupid nagging feeling. Why does it bother me?

  After an upbeat song, Vincent sighs. “I hate to do this, but I need to call and check up on my mom. Don’t go anywhere. I’ll be right back.” He kisses my forehead and walks away. I’m left alone on the dance floor.

  Someone taps me on the shoulder and when I turn, my heart lodges in my throat. “Casper.”

  The DJ plays a slow song with a haunting piano tune and a beautiful female voice begins singing.

  Seeing Casper in a tux makes me want to lose my inhibitions and kiss him. His brown eyes are dark with intent and I can’t seem to move or speak.

  “May I have this dance?” he asks.

  My heart is thundering inside my chest. I nod and he takes my hand and places his other hand on my waist. I shudder from the pleasurable touch and hope he doesn’t notice. We move blithely as if we’ve been dance partners for years.

  “I thought you weren’t coming.”

  He lifts a shoulder. “I wanted to see you. Y
ou look stunning as always.”

  I brave a look into his fervent eyes, and it’s enough to take my breath away. “You can’t be here,” I say, averting his gaze.

  Casper pulls me closer to him and his lips are close to my ear. “It’s my prom, too. I have every right to be here.” His fingers interweave through mine with the most tender touch.

  “You know what I mean.”

  “I know. I’ve been thinking, Megan.”

  “About?”

  “I’m not sorry about the kiss. And if Vincent’s the one you want, I will wait for you. Because I know deep down inside, I won’t ever love another woman the way I love you.” He lowers his lips to my ear again. “I know you feel it, too.” He draws back and kisses my hand.

  The feelings are too intense, and I can’t fight them anymore. Cherry’s right. I’m pushing away something that feels so right and it’s making me crazy. I know what I have to do.

  A breath escapes my lips. “It’s you.”

  “What?”

  “It’s you, Casper. But you have to get away from me. I can’t be seen with you.”

  Casper stares into my eyes with an edge. “Megan—”

  We stop dancing and I reluctantly pull away from him. I can’t let Vincent see us dancing. I have to end it with Vincent without him getting angry.

  He nods. “I get it,” he says, and I don’t miss the bitter tone, but he has it all wrong. He walks away before I can explain myself. My heart won’t stop beating so fast and for some reason I want to cry. I shake my head and take deep breaths.

  “You know, I didn’t mean that literally,” Vincent says behind me which startles me.

  Confused, I turn around to see his smile. “What?”

  “When I said not to go anywhere.”

  “Oh.”

  “Are you okay?”

  I nod.

  “Are you ready to leave?”

  “Yes.”

  We ride in silence in the car. I don’t want to push the issue, but he never explained the visions to me. I have to talk to him, and I expect him to take me home, but he’s going the wrong way.

  “Where are we going?”

  “My house. I have a surprise.” He smiles.

  “I can’t stay out late.”

  He sighs. “None of that will matter soon.”

  I’m nervous. I’m not ready for anything and as much as I hate to think it, I’m so ready for this night to be over. I want to tell Vincent about the kiss, but tonight isn’t the night and I’m too scared. As I look at Vincent in the soft orange glow of the limo’s interior lights, I realize that what I feel for Casper is so much stronger than what I feel for Vincent. I knew this already. I don’t want to break his heart, but I have to tell him.

  When we get to his house, he blindfolds me and takes me inside. I can hear him flicking a lighter and I start smelling candles. My palms begin to sweat. I wring my hands and feel him behind me.

  He unties the blindfold and there are hundreds of red and white rose petals leading upstairs with the tea light candles.

  “Vincent,” I whisper.

  “I wanted to do something romantic for you.” He brushes his lips against mine. “Do you want something to drink?”

  “Sure,” I say, my throat suddenly dry. I put my purse down on the table and he hands me a glass of water. I chug the whole glass.

  His lips tickle my neck, my shoulder. Vincent takes my hand and leads me toward the stairs, but I don’t budge.

  “What is it?”

  “I-I’m not ready.”

  He smiles sweetly. “But it’s prom.” He shakes his head. “We have all the time in the world for that.” I feel a stabbing pain in my chest. “Your surprise is upstairs.”

  I follow him, losing my grip on things. How can I tell him I don’t want to be together anymore? My heart is lodged inside my throat making it hard to breathe or swallow. We get to his room and I sit on his bed.

  He hands me a small box and gets down on one knee. I’m trying not to jump to conclusions, but my whole body is shaking.

  “Vincent.”

  His eyes hold mine. “Megan, I love you. I always have and always will. I see no reason why we can’t be together forever. You are my soulmate. You are the sun in my life. You’re everything to me. Will you marry me?” He opens the box revealing a white gold ring with a sky-blue aquamarine stone surrounded by swirls and flowers.

  I can’t breathe. I can’t speak. Marriage? We are so young! We don’t know each other that well. But he’s completely serious.

  “Obviously we’ll wait until we’re out of school,” he adds. “But I’ve got it all worked out.”

  “This is crazy.” I stand, moving to the window. Dizziness overcomes me, and I grip the ledge. He turns me around to face him.

  “I don’t mean to scare you. I couldn’t wait to ask you. I want to be with you forever.”

  I start crying. This is getting too deep, too fast.

  He pulls me to him. “Please don’t cry.”

  “We need to talk.”

  As one would assume, his muscles go rigid. He draws back, holding me at arm’s length. “What is it?”

  “I just, Vincent, this is too fast. I mean we barely know each other.”

  “I know a lot more than you think. We are meant for each other. I have plans for us. For us to run away from all of this. Neither one of us is happy here. My mom’s on her deathbed. Your parents are insanely controlling and strict. We can have our own life and leave this place.”

  I try to get the words out, but they won’t form. “I love you; I do. I think-I think we should—”

  “Don’t you dare say it. I’m sorry for scaring you but that’s no reason to end this.”

  I shake my head. “It’s not that. I need some time.”

  “Time for what? You’ve been distant all night. What’s going on?”

  I swallow several times as the ache in my heart spreads to my stomach.

  Vincent narrows his eyes and his face grows dark. His whole demeanor changes like a switch went off. “It’s him isn’t it?” His tone is harsh, and he grips my arms.

  “Who?”

  “Don’t play innocent with me.”

  This is going downhill in a hurry.

  “What are you talking about? I’m talking about you and me.” There’s no way I can admit to him about mine and Casper’s kiss right now.

  “What is it about Casper that has you so wound around him? Has he been manipulating you again?”

  “What? No. This has nothing to do with him,” I lie, feeling ashamed.

  “This has everything to do with him. No matter what, you always choose him. Every time.”

  “What are you talking about? I’ve never chosen him.”

  “You always do. Even after everything I do to keep you two apart. I vandalized your car and framed him, yet you believed Casper. I spread the rumors about you sleeping with him. I was the one who killed Adam because he came after you, and you still hail Casper as your hero.”

  Air traps in my lungs. He killed someone? His confessions boggle in my mind like dice in a cup. I feel sick and my knees are weak and I’m starting to feel sleepy. It’s too much. I can’t even look at him. “Why?” My voice is barely audible.

  “Because I would do anything for you. I even tried killing that vile Elf by running him off the road and shooting him. I was at the hospital that night to finish him off, but you ruined that. Imagine my surprise when he woke up because of you. I have given you my heart. I have given you everything you can ever imagine. What more do you want?”

  “D-did you just call him an Elf?”

  “Because that’s what he is. The story you and I have been writing is real. You and I are Sprites, Megan.”

  I shake my head. “Vincent, it’s just a story. A story that I created from all these crazy dreams I’ve been having. Every single night about you and Casper and—”

  Vincent bursts into laughter, releasing his grip on me. “I can’t believe I didn’t see
this before. That’s how you’ve been finding each other.”

  I don’t know what he’s talking about and I don’t know why I’m still standing here. I need to get out of here away from this dangerous and obsessive man. But what does he mean the story is real? Does he know why I have these dreams? “What’s going on? Have you been playing me for a fool?”

  He stops laughing and looks at me severely. “Absolutely not.”

  “Then what’s going on? What is all this? I don’t understand. Why would you try to kill Casper?”

  “I’m sure you’ll figure it out soon enough with your precious dreams.” He moves closer to me and I turn my head. His lips are on my ear and he whispers to me. “I bet you wouldn’t even have thought about him twice without these dreams.” He pulls back and forces me to look at him, his hand squeezing my jaw. “We had a lifetime once. In this godforsaken world. You never found Casper. And we were happy. But there was a part of you that remained distant. I took you home, but you aged and died. I was so lost. I thought I had lost you forever. I didn’t find you again until now.”

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “Not now. But you will. When I first saw you, I nearly fainted.” His eyes welled. “You can’t know what this has done to me. And no matter what, you always choose him.”

  I have to get out of here and talk to Casper but I’m so sleepy that I’m having a hard time keeping my eyes open or even standing still. This is insane.

  “I have to go, Vincent.” I try prying his grip from my jaw, but he doesn’t budge. “Let me go.”

  “Don’t you get it? You promised yourself to me. You promised we would run away and be together.”

  A tear slides down my face and he loosens his grip. “I need to go home,” I whisper and fall against him.

  I feel his arms around me, and he sighs. “We’ll be there soon.”

  Chapter Forty-Five

  Casper and I are outside in the maze, hidden from view of the others. In the dark sky above, the full moon is our only light. We discreetly make our way through the maze but yearn to move quicker. We make it to the side of the palace where there is a lone white palomino waiting.