Lost To The Bear (BBW Bear Shifter Romance)

by Ariana Hawkes

  “I’m pretty sure that your idea is spot-on,” Lauren said. “This is a dating app for curvy girls and shifters – men who can turn into animals. Connor is a bear shifter, and so is Logan.” Kristin’s dark eyes became huge, and her mouth made a small O.

  “No shit?” she said, after a long pause. “Knowing you ladies as well as I do, I’m going to assume that you’ve verified this isn’t bullshit?” They nodded encouragingly. “Wow. To say that I’m stunned, amazed, and flabbergasted would be the understatement of the year. I thought that shape shifters died out along with the Latin language.”

  “Nope. They’re alive and kicking, and they’ve existed throughout the history of mankind. According to Connor anyway,” Lauren said.

  “So, were all those hot guys at the wedding that I’ve never seen before shape shifters?” Kristin asked. Dina nodded. “That’s – that’s really cool,” she said slowly. “It’s going to take me some time to process this though.” She looked at her watch. “And time is something I don’t have right now. I have to go. I’ll call you guys later tonight.” She stood up and blew them each a kiss, put $5 on the table, dropped her phone in her purse and hurtled off.

  “That went well,” Lauren said.

  “Yeah, she seemed a lot easier to persuade than I’d expected,” Dina agreed.

  “So what now?”

  “I’d say let’s give her a little time to stare at some scorching-hot shifters, and then encourage her to message a couple of them.”

  “Makes sense.” The two women exchanged conspiratorial grins.

  2

  Kristin clapped her hand over her mouth to suppress a yawn. The Hope Valley town hall meeting was long, and so far there hadn’t been much to report on. Only stuff like planning permission disputes and various petitions, which Kristin only put in the paper when she was really desperate for news. The room was hot and airless, and she fidgeted uncomfortably, wafting her face with a folded-up pamphlet. She hated being cooped up anywhere for long periods of time.

  As the lead councilor droned on and on about some tedious, who-gives-a-shit issue, her brain bounced a single thought around: there’s a dating app full of men who sometimes shift into animals! The thought was accompanied by a whole range of emotions – skepticism, shock, curiosity and excitement. She reached for her purse, snuck her phone out of it and tapped the little orange paw print of the Shiftr app. It opened on the profile photo of the last guy she’d seen. He was powerfully built, with bulky muscles and washboard abs. He had messy hair, narrow eyes, and a lazy grin. He had to be a lion. A swipe to the left confirmed it, and she smiled to herself. In the photo, he was lying in the middle of a forest trail, like the king of the jungle. Would it be a good thing to date a lion? Weren’t they supposed to be lazy? Whenever she’d played that game of what animal would you be? she’d always picked a lion, because she knew she projected a tough, intrepid character. But did that mean that she should have a lazy partner, who expected her to make all the effort? Or should she be looking for someone who shared her qualities instead? She scrolled up and down. The wolves looked interesting. Some of them seemed tough and dominant, while others looked softer. Didn’t they have that alpha/beta thing going on? Maybe she’d like an alpha male, as long as he didn’t try to dominate her. But perhaps that’s the whole point of being an alpha wolf – you’re always superior to your partner? She paused on one guy. He had golden-brown hair in a stylish cut, and a broad, angular face, with defined cheekbones and a very square jaw. She adored men with chiseled features. She zoomed in on his face. His eyes were a very unusual shade of green, almost like grass – and they sparkled beguilingly.

  “Wow,” she said aloud.

  “I know, it’s awful, isn’t it?” the guy next to her muttered. “Can’t believe they’re cutting the budget again!”

  “Yeah; it’s terrible,” she replied, sucking in her lips to stop herself from giggling. She tuned the guy out and returned to the phone screen. So what kind of shape shifter is he? Lion? Tiger? She swiped to the left, and a huge, beautiful, orange and black tiger was revealed, surrounded by dense green foliage. The animal’s cool green eyes were the exact same shade as the man’s, with the same glowing intensity. At this discovery, a shiver ran through her body. She shook herself. What? Why am I suddenly finding it so hot that he’s half tiger? She swiped right and stared at the guy’s torso. He had the body of a sprinter, with huge, sinewy muscles: her absolute favourite kind of athlete. His skin was olive-toned, with those small, flat brown nipples that she loved on men. She swiped from tiger-to-man, man-to-tiger a couple more times. Her clit was actually tingling. There was just something about the thought of him being so powerful and wild that did something crazy to her.

  She scrolled through his profile. He was 6’2”, which meant that he’d still be taller than her when she was in heels. He enjoyed traveling, rock music gigs, dirt-bike racing, reading, painting and visiting art galleries. He loved hanging out with his friends, but valued his independence too. He was looking to meet a curvy, feisty woman who was his equal in all respects. He’s not only smoking hot, but his personality sounds perfect too. She tried not to let her mouth hang open. Ok, how do you let someone know that you like them? She scrolled down to the ‘send this member a message’ icon. Her thumb hovered over it.

  And she let her phone drop into her lap. Who the hell was she kidding? This guy was absolutely stunning. Ridiculously good-looking. She needed to be more realistic. She picked the phone up again and swiped to her profile. Dina and Lauren were utter sweethearts. They’d listed her hobbies as writing, basketball, traveling, hiking, and hanging out with her best friends. In the ‘seeking’ section, they’d said she was looking for a man who was as fearless as she was, who loved travel, adventures and cozy Sunday lie-ins. They knew her so well. The face shots they’d picked out were nice too. Kristin was pretty much ok with her face. She’d always been told she was pretty as a kid, and she’d dated a lot in high school. It was her body that she could never come to terms with.

  When she was 22 and just finishing college, she’d broken out in acne for the first time in her life, her periods became really irregular, and she put on 35 pounds for no reason at all. She’d completely freaked, and been to see several specialists. And they’d all told her the same thing: her ovaries were growing cysts, which were making her hormones unbalanced. There was nothing they could do about it; all they could do was treat the symptoms. She’d recovered from the acne by going through a controversial treatment program, and it was pretty nice only having four or five periods every year. But the weight wouldn’t shift. She was an athlete, and she knew how to push her body to its limit, but six punishing sessions a week weren’t enough for her to regain her previous figure. She was stuck being 40 pounds overweight. And if she missed a couple of sessions, another five pounds crept on, as if by magic.

  She’d wasted most of her twenties not dating, hiding from people she’d known at school. When she ran into guys she’d dated when she was the school basketball star, she felt ashamed, convincing herself that she saw surprise and disappointment in their eyes. By the time she was 29, she was borderline anorexic, living on 800 calories per day, which was what it took to keep her weight at a level she was happy with. One day, she was so weak from hunger and over-exercise that she collapsed in the shopping mall. When she regained consciousness, lying on a hard marble floor with a splitting headache and a crowd of people standing around her, she’d promised herself that it stopped right there. She’d started eating sensibly, with normal portions, and continued working out hard. Her weight had stabilized, and her figure was shapely and well defined. She still didn’t feel like herself, but people said she was sexy. She had boyfriends on and off into her thirties, but she could never let her guard down. Regardless of what they said to her, she thought they’d leave her for the skinnier girl. She was always defensive, always trying to stay one step ahead of them. She mostly dated bad boys, so it wasn’t a surprise when they dumped her, while the nice
guys would eventually tire of the endless conflict, and move onto someone else.

  Kristin stared at the full-body shot gloomily. If it was someone else’s photo, she might have said that she was looking at a statuesque, voluptuous woman, but she couldn’t help zeroing in on the things she hated about her body – like her wide hips and oversized boobs. Still, Dina and Lauren had said it was a dating site for curvy girls. She looked at the tiger’s profile again. Under the family section, he’d selected the option “no kids yet, but planning on having a big family some day.” And that was the other issue right there: she had no idea whether she’d be able to provide a partner with children. And that made her feel like she was on the dating scrapheap.

  Kristin jumped at the sound of chairs scraping across the floor. Damnit! She’d missed the last 20 minutes of the meeting at least, and now she had nothing to write about. Tomorrow afternoon’s paper was going to involve some heavy creative license. Oh well, that was nothing new. The truth was that there wasn’t too much to write about in their local town. There had never been a murder or a kidnapping. Violent crime was almost unheard of. Regardless, she loved working for the Hope Valley Echo. It was all about community. When she’d graduated from college, she’d gotten offers from several high profile papers, but she’d never wanted to live anywhere but her hometown, and write about the daily happenings of the people she cared about.

  She dropped her phone, her notepad and her pen in her bag, and got to her feet. She needed to head back to the newspaper office and complete half a dozen articles for tomorrow’s paper, as well as covering for the subeditor who was off sick. It was going to be a long evening. And the last thing she needed was to be distracted by sexy tiger-men that she couldn’t have. She took her phone out of her bag and moved the app to trash. She didn’t even have the log-in details, so there was no way she could access it, even if her resolve weakened.

  Late into the evening, when the sky had already been pitch black for several hours, Kristin’s eyes slid to the bottom right of her computer screen. 10:15pm. Her eyes were stinging, and the fluorescent light overhead buzzed dismally. There was an empty container of chicken salad, a half-eaten packet of dry-roasted peanuts and two diet coke cans on the desk next to her. Rubbing her eyes, she looked around the office. She was the only person there. All her news stories were written and everyone else’s were subbed. She sent all the final versions to the editor in chief, and she leaned back in her chair and stretched. Work is over for the day! she told herself, and she was immediately filled with elation, and thoughts about what she was going to do with the rest of the evening. She’d been thinking about Shiftr on and off while she’d been working. The tiger wasn’t the one for her, clearly. But Lauren and Dina had both found gorgeous men for themselves, so she wasn’t ready to ditch the app altogether. Maybe there were shifters on there who weren’t so keen to have kids. She was itching to go and see the girls and find out more about these shape-shifting men. But was it too late? She tapped out a message to Dina, since she tended to be a night owl when she didn’t have to get up for school the next day.

  Dina replied as Kristin was walking across the parking lot to her car:

  Yes, I’m still up, hun! We’re at home and Lauren’s here too. Come see us!

  Kristin deliberated for a moment. She was tired, and a drive out to the national park seemed like a lot right now. But it wasn’t like she had anything else to do. The thought of her lonely bed wasn’t too appealing either. She messaged Dina back, asking her for directions.

  Half an hour later, Kristin turned into a very dark road. From the car’s headlights, she could barely make out that it was a dirt track. Dina had given her exact coordinates for her GPS, and she followed the soothing male voice as it told her to continue for 623 yards and then stop. “You have reached your destination,” it said. There was absolutely nothing around. Just woods on the right, and a steep bank on the left. She called Dina.

  “I’m here – I think,” she said hesitantly, as Dina’s chirpy voice came on the line.

  “Hang tight, Logan will come pick you up,” Dina replied.

  Moments later, Logan came bounding through the trees.

  “Hey, Kristin!” he called, enveloping her in a giant hug. He was built on such a large scale that they made her feel tiny.

  “Hey, Logan! Good to see you,” she replied.

  “It’s this way,” he said and dived back into the woods. She followed him closely as he picked his way among the trees, asking her all about her day. The enveloping darkness lifted as they came to a row of cute wooden cabins.

  “Ours is the third one along,” Logan said, showing her in. Kristin walked up the steps leading to the veranda, and into the arms of a grinning Dina.

  “Hey, girl!” she yelled. “I’m so excited that you finally get to see our place! Come on, I’ll show you around.” She took Kristin by the hand and led her inside. Lauren was in the living room, reclining on a big leather sofa, and she pulled herself up with difficulty to hug Kristin hello.

  The cabin was adorable. It was cozy and rustic, but also stylishly furnished, with a lot of beautifully-carved wood.

  “Like a drink, Kristin?” Logan asked, as she sat down on the sofa next to the girls.

  “Why not?” she replied. “I don’t suppose you have whisky?”

  “Of course,” Logan said with a chuckle, and poured her a tumbler-full. It was rich and peaty, and as she sipped, the stresses of the week drained away.

  “So?” Lauren said expectantly. “How’s the app?”

  “Um, you’re going to have to give me the password, since I had to disable it after it resulted in me not getting any stories out of that damned town hall meeting,” she said, laughing.

  “Oh, it’s just Shiftr. But let me download the app for you. I need to use a link from my email, because it’s not available in the regular app store. It’s a secret app.” Kristin handed her phone over and Lauren fiddled with it. “Ooh, you haven’t activated your messages. Let me fix that right now!”

  As Lauren gave the phone back to Kristin, it began to emit all kinds of beeps. “Wow, Kristin, you’ve got mail!” Dina exclaimed. She and Lauren huddled on either side of her as she accessed her mailbox. There was a total of 15 messages waiting for her. Kristin tapped to open the first one, and immediately caught her breath.

  “Oh my god, it’s from the tiger!” she said.

  “Who’s that?” Dina and Lauren said at the same time.

  “Oh, this insanely hot guy I was staring at earlier,” she replied. Her pulse had quickened, and perspiration broke out on her palms. “Ok, what’s he saying to me? – Hi there, beautiful. I see you’ve left your scent on my trail. You sound very interesting. I’d love to get to know you better,” she read. She paused, frowning. “What’s he talking about? Scent? Trail?” Lauren laughed.

  “One thing I didn’t mention is that when you visit someone’s profile, you leave a track behind, so they can see you’ve checked them out.”

  “What? This is terrible!” Kristin exclaimed.

  “Shifters are pretty direct; there’s no hiding yourself on this site,” Logan said in his warm, rumbly voice.

  “And what are you worried about?” Dina said. “He thinks you’re hot!”

  “No. Just no. He’s way hotter than I am.”

  “Uh, hello?” Lauren snatched the phone out of Kristin’s hand and pulled up her profile photos. “Not from where I’m standing, chica!” she said.

  “I appreciate you putting up those photos of me, but they’re really flattering. If he saw the real me, he’d be sorely disappointed,” Kristin said firmly.

  “But – ”

  “No buts. Now, I’m going to check out my other messages.”

  Most of them were simple ‘Want to find out if we’re a match?’ alerts, followed by a happy face and a sad face icon.

  “I feel like I’m going to really offend these guys by looking at their profiles, leaving a track, and then saying no,” Kristin said, clicking
on a profile of a beaver shifter. “I mean, this one looks like a great guy, but – a beaver? I don’t know. It just doesn’t feel right to me.”

  “Guys don’t work like that, especially shifters,” Logan said, with a grin. “We’re all about finding our perfect match, so anything else is a waste of everyone’s time. If you’re not interested, you’ll be doing these guys a big favor by telling them straight up.”

  “Uh, ok,” Kristin said, giving the beaver the sad-face treatment.

  “You know you can filter by animal, right?” Lauren said.

  “Oh, really?”

  “Tell me what kind of shifters you see yourself with? Or at least, which ones you wouldn’t rule out?” Lauren said, swiping to the options page. Kristin leaned back on the sofa and stared up at the cabin’s wooden beams.

  “All big cats, I guess,” she said. “Wolves kind of intrigue me.” She slid a glance at Logan. “Bears, of course.”

  “Are you sure?” Dina said. “You’re such a city girl, Kristin, and bears always live out in nature.”

  “We’re earthy and kind of homely. And we get a little slow and grizzly in winter when our bodies want us to hibernate,” Logan chipped in.

  “Ok, fair enough,” she said, her voice tinged with regret. “What else is there?”

  “Um, horses, deer, moose, sea creatures. Everything you can think of really,” Dina said.

  “No. I think I’m good with felines and wolves. I feel like I need to be with a shifter that’s high up in the food chain. I want a guy I can wrestle with, you know? The kind who challenges me.” Dina shuddered and snuggled into Logan.

  “It’s a good job there are so many types of shifter out there,” she said. “Conflict is the last thing I like in a relationship.” Kristin looked at Dina with affection. Logan’s hand was resting on her pregnant belly, and he looked like he couldn’t be happier sitting with her, just chilling, while she gossiped with her friends. They were absolutely adorable together, she thought, as she got up to visit the bathroom.