FIGHT FOR ME

by AJ Crowe

  The same look that frustrated her because he wasn’t ripping her clothes off.

  “Um,” she said, just trying to fill the silence. He looked up to her eyes. He almost looked a little flustered, like he hadn’t meant to be distracted by her legs. “Your week was good?”

  He nodded, flicking ash off his cigarette and looking out over the pond and surrounding greenery. Kimbo was on the other side of the pond, barking at ducks.

  “I think I like Paisley,” she tried.

  He nodded again, still not looking at her.

  “Why did you move here, again?”

  Now he looked at her. He put out the cigarette on the metal arm of the bench and let it drop to the ground. “I came here from the city,” he said simply.

  “Oh? I live in the city. After being here for a few days, I can totally understand the appeal. It’s nice here. Calm. Is that why you moved?”

  “Something like that,” he said, nodding slowly.

  Ivy wondered if she’d stumbled upon a subject he didn’t feel like talking about. Good going, she thought.

  When Kimbo started chasing a pair of ducks a little too intently, Lucas stood up. As he stood his leg accidentally brushed hers.

  It was the first time it touched, and it was only denim on her skin for a split second –even so, it made her breathe a little faster.

  “I need to take Kimbo home,” he said.

  “Oh, all right.”

  “I’ll see you Monday.”

  “Okay.”

  He walked away, somewhat swiftly. Ivy watched him as he called Kimbo to him across the pond, reattached his leash, and started to walk home. He took the long way back toward town, avoiding the bench with Ivy on it.

  Well. That was confusing.

  Now Ivy just felt awkward sitting on the bench. That dreamy feeling of earlier was gone, replaced by a touch of “this guy is really pissing me off with his body and mixed signals.”

  * * * *

  She decided to head to that library. She should have gone there in the first place. Words were one of her favorite things, hence the career as an editor.

  The walk to the other side of town with the library was a little longer than she would like. She stopped halfway through at a chain restaurant downtown and got a burger and fries. Full and ready for the next leg of her journey, she walked to the library. She realized it was only a few blocks away from Jess’s apartment building, just the opposite way from downtown.

  Ivy walked into the stone building. It was smaller than she’d thought it was; the inside consisted of an open ceiling first floor and a second floor platform accessible by stairs. A skylight opened onto both floors.

  Only a few people were inside the library, reading or studying or browsing the books. Ivy nodded to the librarian at the checkout desk as she walked through the metal detectors flanking the inside doors.

  She walked up to the second floor, pulled a book off of a shelf at random, and sat in an armchair in the corner of the floor. She looked at the book she’d picked. “Macrobiotic Cooking for Dummies.”

  Not exactly what she was looking for. Sighing, she stood up and turned toward the shelves to pick out a new book.

  Lucas was standing at the other end of the aisle of books, at the top of the stairs to the second floor. He looked a little out of breath.

  “Lucas?”

  He walked toward her, confidently. With purpose.

  Her heart beat fast.

  “Ivy.” He took her face in his hands. His palms were warm and his grip was strong.

  “What are you doing?”

  “I…” He dropped his hands from her. He stood very close to her. She could hear him breathing.

  “Did you follow me here?”

  He just looked at her.

  “What the fuck is wrong with you, Lucas?” She didn’t give a thought to what she was saying. “You… You look at me like that every morning for a week. Yet you act like I don’t interest you in the least.”

  He kissed her.

  Ivy pulled away after a split second. “What are you doing?” She felt light headed.

  “I want to kiss you,” he said. His lips were slightly parted and looked so, so soft. “I wanted to kiss you the moment I saw you.”

  “Kiss me,” she said; not as a command but because she was seeking confirmation for what she was hearing.

  “That’s right. You are…” He looked at her, her entire self, his eyes lingering on her breasts and hips before he met her eyes again. “Intoxicating.”

  Ivy felt herself melt right then and there. This was ridiculous. Lucas was ridiculous.

  “Fucking kiss me then.”

  He did. He pushed against the wall of books and kissed her, hard, open mouthed. His breath was warm and his tongue tasted like cigarettes and something darker. Ivy put a hand around his neck to steady herself.

  Breathing hard, she pulled away again. “Why wait until now?”

  “It’s unorthodox; asking a girl out the moment you set eyes on her.”

  “I wanted you to.”

  “I could tell.”

  Ivy brushed her lips against his, their noses bumping. Their eyes met. His eyes were offensively green.

  “Will you go on a date with me tonight?” He asked it quietly, with almost a joking tone.

  “Yes,” Ivy said without thinking about it at all. Her hand was still on his neck. She felt the heat of his attraction for her on his skin.

  Now he stepped away. Ivy’s hand fell by her side. “I’m going to leave. I’m not going to follow you for the rest of the day. I’ll pick you up at Jess’s. Seven?”

  “Seven.” She nodded.

  He walked away. Before he started down the stairs he turned to her and smiled.

  Oh.

  Oh my.

  Ivy collapsed into the armchair again and took a few deep breaths.

  Chapter Six

  She left the library right away. She could always go back there later –and she didn’t feel like reading right this moment.

  When Ivy got back to the apartment she found Jess and Emma playing a board game on the coffee table. Emma was moving her piece over the board and counting loudly.

  “One, two, three, four…”

  “Hi guys!”

  Jess looked up at Ivy. “Hey! How was your adventure?”

  Ivy laughed. It kind of was an adventure. “I had fun. I went to the park and the library. Oh, and I ate brunch at that cute place… I think it was named after a flower?”

  “Hyacinth’s,” Jess guessed. “Sounds nice.”

  “It was.” Ivy paused. She considered mentioning what had happened with Lucas but ultimately decided not to, at least not then. Emma would be confused to hear that her teacher wanted to see her aunt later that night. Maybe Ivy would tell Jess later.

  She watched her sister and niece finish the game and played with them afterward. When Jess asked what she wanted for dinner, Ivy said she was thinking about going out that night. Jess seemed a little confused but didn’t ask any questions.

  Around six, when Jess and Emma were eating pizza and watching cartoons, Ivy started to find herself glued to the clock. She kept looking at her phone. Should she start getting ready now? Did she need an hour to get ready? Not really, but why not?

  She excused herself from the living room and went to Jess’s room –where all her stuff was –to pick out an outfit.

  She hadn’t packed for this trip with a hot date in mind. After almost ten minutes of frustration, she settled on a flower print dress, denim jacket, and blue flats. Still casual, but a step up from the sweat pants and jeans she had worn every day since she’d got to Paisley.

  She wondered where Lucas wanted to take her to dinner. According to her phone, there were a total of five restaurants in Paisley that weren’t downtown. Only two of them weren’t chain junk food places.

  Ivy took a deep breath.

  Makeup. She should put on a little makeup.

  She went to the bathroom. As she put on mascar
a and lip gloss she realized just how unusual it was for her to get this excited and nervous over a date. She felt sixteen again, unsure and inexperienced though that really wasn’t the case.

  Would he still like her after spending more than a few minutes with her?

  She reminded herself of the kiss they had shared in the library. The way he had kissed her… She wondered what might happen after dinner.

  Whatever happened, she wanted to be prepared. Feeling her cheeks get hot even though there was no one to witness, Ivy took a pair of black lace panties out of her suitcase and slipped them on.

  * * * *

  When Lucas texted her to say he was there to pick her up, Ivy told Jess she was going out to dinner but still withheld exactly who she was going with. She was pretty sure that Jess knew exactly what was happening, even if she didn’t know the specifics.

  Jess looked like she was about to ask why Ivy had put on a dress and makeup if she was going out to dinner by herself, but instead asked an easier question. Ivy sighed in relief.

  “When do you think you’ll be back?”

  “I’m not sure. Probably a… a few hours.” She really didn’t know what to say.

  “Okay. Have fun.”

  She gave Jess a quick kiss on the cheek and nearly ran down the steps to the street.

  Idling next to Ivy’s decade old Honda Accord that she hadn’t touched since she got here was a glinting red vintage convertible Mustang, probably from the sixties or seventies. Lucas was sitting in the front with the top down. He was wearing a black button up shirt and had slicked his hair back.

  He didn’t look like a kindergarten teacher come to pick up his date in a small town. He looked like some international European model.

  Lucas got out of the car and opened the door on the passenger side for her. “Hey.”

  “Hi. Nice ride. How did you afford this?” The question came out before Ivy realized it was inappropriate. She just couldn’t imagine a vintage muscle car in mint condition being on a kindergarten teacher’s salary.

  He laughed.

  “I can’t really afford it. It was a… gift. About half my paycheck goes to keeping it running and the gas tank full.”

  “I can imagine.” Ivy sat down in the passenger seat, smoothing her skirt over her lap. She felt her nervousness melting away.

  Lucas let the door swing shut and got behind the wheel.

  “Are you in the mood for Indian? There’s a nice place a few minutes away.”

  “Sounds good.”

  “Nice” was an understatement. The restaurant was a cloth napkin and tablecloth with a candle type deal. The simple curry Ivy ordered cost fifteen dollars. The bottle of champagne Lucas ordered cost forty.

  “This is… amazing. I wasn’t expecting much more than a decent Italian place or something.” Ivy smiled across the table at Lucas.

  He shrugged. “I want to impress you.”

  “You definitely have.” Ivy took a sip of wine. “So… tell me about yourself?”

  He looked up at her, appearing a little put off.

  “I’m mostly curious about how you ended up in Paisley. You said at the park that you came from the city?”

  “Yeah,” he said. “But it’s really not an interesting story at all. I want to know about you, Ivy.”

  “What do you want to know?” She decided not to ask why he’d moved again. He obviously really didn’t want to talk about it.

  “Hm.” He leaned back in his chair. A strand of black hair fell into his eyes. “Did you grow up in the city?”

  “Yep. This is my first time spending so much consecutive time in a small town.”

  “But you like it.”

  “I do.”

  He cocked his head and looked at her for a moment. She breathed carefully. She felt like he could tell much more about her by looking than from whatever answers she gave to his questions.

  “What do you do? For a living.”

  “I edit a real estate magazine.”

  “Sounds… interesting.”

  “It really isn’t. I grew up loving words and writing and wanted to be a writer. I got to college, majored in English, realized I had no talent for writing but had a good intuition for the English language, and ended up editing a magazine that barely has any writing in it at all.”

  “Well. You don’t sound too satisfied.”

  “I’m not. I’m really not.” Ivy had barely admitted this to herself, let alone anyone else. “Did you always want to be a teacher?”

  Lucas shook his head. “No. But I enjoy it. More than I thought I would.”

  “What did you major in?”

  He blinked. “Don’t judge –but, uh, I didn’t go to college. Not until I moved here. I got a teaching certification. Actually, I’m still getting certified. This job is part of the whole process.”

  “Hey, everyone has their own path. Why not go to college?”

  “I just felt like what I wanted to do in life didn’t require a college degree.”

  “What did you do instead?”

  A pause. “Travel. I took odd jobs and traveled around the world.”

  “Seriously? I’ve always wanted to travel but the farthest I’ve been is across the country. Where have you been?”

  “It’s not that long of a list. A few countries in Europe. I spent the most time in Italy and France. Then India, and Australia, and most of South America.”

  “Lucas. That’s a pretty long list.”

  He shrugged, smiling. “Longer than yours.” He scraped up a last bite from his entrée of chicken tikka masala. “It was a while ago.”

  There was a comfortable silence. Ivy could barely imagine that earlier that day they’d had that awkward encounter in the park. The atmosphere was completely different now.

  She poured herself another glass of wine. The meal was coming to an end but it felt like it had just begun. She felt like she could banter with Lucas forever.

  “After this,” he began, as if he was feeling the same as she was. “I was thinking about going to a gallery. You might have seen it earlier today when you were downtown. It’s called the Tilt. There’s some modern art show that I thought you might like.”

  Ivy raised an eyebrow. “Do I look like I like modern art?”

  He shrugged. “You seem like you’d like classy stuff.”

  “Classy? I like that.” She laughed. “Sure. I’m down. Are you ready to go now?”

  Lucas nodded and hailed the waiter.

  * * * *

  A few minutes later they pulled up in front of the gallery. The building had large glass windows that gave a preview of the show inside. It also showed that the gallery was empty except for an elderly man with a thin face sitting at a little counter looking at his phone.

  They got out of the car waved to the man inside. It took a few moments before he noticed them. The man opened the door and let them in.

  “Welcome to Tilt. Our current show is of the work of artist Michael Huntington. Enjoy.” The man sat down again and pulled out his smart phone.

  Lucas and Ivy shared an amused glance. They had both noticed the man’s lack of enthusiasm.

  After spending a little over an hour consecutively with Lucas, Ivy was familiar with his sheepish smile. He smiled often, but as if he shouldn’t be or was surprised to be doing so. It made her want to kiss his lips and see him smile without noticing.

  The art was very strange.

  Ivy had never heard of Michael Huntington, and she never wanted to know more about him. The gallery was filled with statues that seemed basically like blobs of shaped plastic, often in phallic shapes.

  “What do you think?” Lucas asked after they had made their way about half way through the gallery.

  “Well… I’ve never seen anything like these, uh, statues.” Lucas nodded, agreeing. “Though I have to say, they’re a little…” Ivy really didn’t want to say the word phallic on their first date.

  “They look like cocks,” he said in a matter of fact tone, stat
ing the obvious.

  They both burst into laughter. “Yeah,” Ivy said, “That’s exactly it.”

  They continued walking through the gallery, now making joking comments about the art. “That one’s huge,” Lucas said, nodding toward a large blue blob in the corner of the room they were in.

  Ivy nodded. “I can’t believe this guy is making money off of these. I mean, who would buy one?”

  Lucas laughed. “I wouldn’t.”

  When they were nearing the front of the gallery again, Lucas stopped walking. Ivy stopped as well. “What is it?”

  He looked uncomfortable. “Well, I wanted to say…”

  Ivy felt a little cold. Here it was. Honestly, she had felt a big reveal coming from Lucas since the moment she saw him and here it was.

  He was gay. He was married. He was a figment of her imagination. He was something he shouldn’t be if they were to be together.

  He seemed to realize he had been silent for a little too long, thinking. “Sorry, I haven’t done anything like this for a really long time.” He let out a breath. “I wanted to say that you’re really interesting… and beautiful… and I wanted to make sure you had a great time on this date so I brought you to this place, but it turned out to be a pretty big disappointment. So, I’m sorry if you’re… disappointed. I really haven’t done this in a while.”

  Oh.

  The reality of what he had to say was both relieving and worse than what she had imagined. Ivy tried to think of how to respond.

  “Lucas,” she said, taking one of his hands in hers. “I’ve had so much fun tonight. This weird exhibit is hilarious, not disappointing at all. And just spending time with you has been awesome. Not disappointing at all.”

  He looked at their hands, then up at her. Ivy smiled.

  “I’m not as used to this kind of stuff,” he said, gesturing around to what Ivy could only interpret as meaning “galleries” or “dates.” “I really just want to fuck you,” he said, completely serious.

  After he said it he looked away, as if he had surprised himself.

  Ivy blinked. Well. Lucas was full of surprises.

  Usually she would see this kind of talk as a major red flag, but… it seemed less like he was trying to lure her into bed and more like he was just used to being honest about what he wanted.