The Outlaw's Second Chance

by Angie Dicken

  “Of course. Did you hear of any work in town?”

  “No.” She pressed her lips together and batted away frustrated tears. “I didn’t have much time once the doctor found the board for Ben. I’ll have to go back.” She balled her hand. This afternoon, as she struggled to get the board across the prairie, taking not one step closer to building her ranch, independence seemed like a fairy tale. Perhaps it was the heat, or maybe her nausea coaxed by the stench of unbathed settlers and the taste of dust on her tongue, but she wasn’t so sure she believed any of this was worth it right now. Ben must come first. And her frustration with that nicked her heart. How selfish. How unloving she was.

  Her biggest regret now was turning down the shelter Cort had dug—for her. As much as she considered asking him for the shelter, she could not bring herself to do that. Even on this peaceful evening stroll beside the handsome cowboy with emerald eyes and a kind smile. Her face flushed at the ridiculous thought.

  She blew away strands of hair from her face. Her own shelter must take priority now—something better than the ridiculous quilt flung over her shovel’s handle and a worthless stake. “You wanted to speak with me about business?”

  “Ah, yes.” His face was covered by a sharp shadow, and his strong shoulders were washed in the pinks of the dying sunlight. “I’d like to speak with you about which section of land I might rent from you.”

  She squared her shoulders, drinking in the property ahead. It wasn’t much as far as looks went, but it was broad and vast and all her own. They walked in silence except for the dry grass crunching beneath their feet and the occasional snort from the horse. Cort’s long shadow stretched farther than hers.

  Now, what parcel to give the man who may or may not be staying?

  “It seems you have claimed a piece already with your dugout.” Aubrey winced. Why would she bring that up? “Or the dugout you’d assumed would be mine.” She spoke softer now. She could feel his gaze—or glare—on her left side. “What did you have in mind?”

  He brought the horse to a halt.

  When she glanced up at him, her heart surrendered its beat for a moment. His handsome face was so intent on her that she felt obliged to stare back. Her pulse returned at full force, pounding in her ears and drowning out the wind whipping through the grasses.

  “I thought—” He cleared his throat, still trapping her in an intense stare. She feared that he’d steal away every bit of her. “I might take the far northeastern corner.” A smile crept along his sunburned lips, and laugh lines splayed from the corners of his eyes above his chiseled cheekbones. “Starting at my dugout?” His amused expression broke the strange enchantment and she grew embarrassed.

  “I’ve already told you that I appreciated the sentiment—”

  “I know. I understand.” He tipped her chin up, unlocking a rush of heat. She believed he did understand her. Which frightened her even more. This man could see right through her, it seemed.

  Aubrey hesitated then gently pulled her chin away. “You may lease the land on that side of the creek. I am hoping to build my ranch beyond the creek.” She would need a bridge. And a fence. And so many more important fixtures that Aubrey felt as though she were the old horse burdened with a heavy cart.

  Cort noisily gathered a stuttering breath and stared toward the darkening eastern sky. “Cutting twice as much sod will only fill my days with the work I need to keep my mind busy.” He smiled faintly. His green eyes sprouted with more vibrancy than the dead brush all around. “Let me build you a house, Aubrey.” Her name on his lips never failed to grab her attention, but she mustn’t be needy. She was stronger than he seemed to think.

  “I’d have started on my sod house tomorrow if it weren’t for Ben’s leg. He needs shelter now.” She must remind him that her circumstance was not a reflection of her intention.

  Cort ran his hand beneath his hat and blew out a long minty breath. “I am sorry for his injury, Aubrey. Wish he’d understand that...that—”

  “That it was his fault?” Aubrey perked an eyebrow. “He’d never admit it. Did he speak with you?”

  “More like growled.”

  “Oh, I see.” She bit her lip. “I tried explaining what happened to him. But he’s pegged you as untrustworthy.”

  “Do you believe that?” He stuck his hands in his pockets and rocked on his heels. Her heart skipped.

  “No, Cort. Not from what I can tell.” But his second chance might not be so firmly set, and she was afraid that Ben did have a point—Cort wasn’t dependable in this whole predicament. “For now, I trust your word.”

  He curled his lip and looked away. “Wish you could count on me wholeheartedly.” His jaw flinched. “I am at my best when I work, and I surely want to help you as much as I can. As long as I can.”

  An unexpected wave of compassion flooded every corner of her spirit. His secret, whatever it was, seemed to torment him. “If you wouldn’t mind, I would appreciate your help, Cort.” His face brightened. “It’s what I had hoped to talk with you about this evening. I’m going to work on a dugout tomorrow. Would you help me carry Ben down when it’s ready?”

  “If he’ll let me.” He snickered, and the evening air grew lighter.

  “Thank you. I’d better check on him.” She began to walk away. Cort followed just steps behind, but Aubrey was relieved to part ways at the tree grove.

  As she administered more medicine to her brother and offered him some bread and water, though, she couldn’t shake the heavy feeling resting in her chest. Her burden was more than a cart filled with circumstances. There was something more. This cowboy weighed her down with his kindness and generosity. She’d prayed for this land, but she hadn’t thought God might provide a partner in bringing Mama’s dream about.

  As much as she wanted to keep Cort at a distance, she felt herself wanting him nearby indefinitely. And with Ben and a big dream to tend to, Aubrey couldn’t handle anything else, could she? Why did the thought of caring for this cowboy invigorate her amid such hardship?

  Ben interrupted her thoughts. “I don’t like that Stanton. He seems to be up to something.”

  “He’s plotting his piece of this land deal is all.” Aubrey rolled her eyes. “You need to stop worrying about him. Besides, he’s going to help you get out of this silly tent and get to a proper shelter.”

  “I don’t need his help.”

  “Well, I do.” Aubrey scrunched her nose and looked away. She loved her mother, but she did not want to follow her needy, dependent way. “Mr. Stanton is a good tenant, Ben. He will help get this ranch going.” Yes, he was her employee in a way. She must dissuade her heart from thinking anything contrary. She spied the fire flickering across the clearing. Cort was there.

  “I could stay and help you start the ranch,” Ben offered, jutting his chin out in a competitive way.

  “You’ve done enough. Lost my horse and didn’t help out with Pa one bit.”

  His nostrils flared and he tried to sit up farther, but then he clutched at his thigh and groaned.

  She reached for his hand and steadied him as he took deep breaths. “I am sorry. I shouldn’t argue with you. You just need to get better.” A heavy guilt settled on her shoulders. He’d fought for her, hadn’t he? And he was her brother. A part of her. A part of her mother. “Once you’re better, you’ll be itching to get back to Liza and Pa and your life. You’ll see.”

  He gave a weak smile and then slowly lay back down.

  She settled next to him and decided to sleep instead of eat. She was exhausted just thinking about the long day of work ahead. It was her turn to break her back on this land of hers. She needed to rest up for such a task. Digging was something she’d only done in a garden.

  The morning sun came quickly, and she scrambled to get ready for the task ahead. It seemed she’d just closed her eyes on nightfall, and now
it was a bright sunny day.

  By late afternoon, she had only dug half the area of Cort’s shelter. Between caring for Ben and stopping for meals, the task was more strenuous than she’d expected. At least she was wise enough to take advantage of the nook they’d slept in that first night. It saved some work. She rushed as best as she could, hoping they could move in by nightfall. Ben’s countenance was nothing like yesterday’s. His fighting spirit was gone. While in the past she would have considered it a good thing, she feared it was a sign of his declining condition. He’d hardly stay awake long enough to drink. Either the medicine was too strong, or he was weak from dehydration. As the day heated up, she offered him water more and more. There were people just two miles away paying and dying for water. He needed to get down in the cooler shade of the creek bed. And hopefully, she’d find Cort to help her when she was ready.

  The cowboy was gone all afternoon. Probably to help at the Hickses’ place. Every time she took a break to check on Ben, she would strain her eyes across the prairie but couldn’t make out Cort or his horse.

  When dusk fell, she began to worry about Cort. Maybe he’d left for good now? So soon? Loneliness began to overwhelm her. How did she ever plan to do this alone? The vastness of the prairie and the openness of the sky seemed to swallow her up.

  Lord, I am never alone with You by my side.

  She began to build a fire so she could heat the can of beans she’d bought while in town yesterday. It would be nice to have a fire to light up the growing darkness, although after the high temperatures she’d endured while digging all day, she didn’t want to sit near any kind of heat.

  Once she warmed the beans, she took her can and sat on the other side of Ben’s tent, staring out into the land she had run through just a few days before. The stars speckled the sky. Had God hung a few extra tonight? She’d never seen so many stars before. The glitter mesmerized her and she thanked Him for giving her this gift.

  God never did disappoint her. He really was the only person she could count on besides herself.

  “Aubrey?” Cort’s voice startled her.

  Her knotted-up nerves collapsed, and she couldn’t help but smile up at him. “I was wondering where you’d been all day.”

  * * *

  By the look of hunger in her eyes, the smell of burned beans didn’t seem to offend Aubrey. If he’d been here, he could have made them for her. After all the meals he’d prepared for hungry cowboys on the drive, he’d love to work up a meal for this pretty lady.

  Aubrey scooped up some for him. After praying, she nodded to Cort with a sort of matronly permission to eat. He shoved his spoon in his mouth to halt the smile that she coaxed from him more often than he’d preferred. The crackling of fire and scraping of spoons on tin plates accompanied the song of a flycatcher, no doubt hunting for grasshoppers in the bright moonlight.

  After they finished eating, Cort settled on his side. He pulled out his carving knife and a piece of wood from his pocket. It’d been too long since he whittled.

  “I think Ben’s dehydrated.” Aubrey’s voice hitched. “This would have never happened if he didn’t steal my horse. Makes me wonder if Pa’s going to come looking for us any minute.”

  “I doubt he will.” Cort stilled his knife and looked up. Aubrey gaped at him. “I’m sorry. I just... I saw him at the camp the morning of the race. He didn’t seem too upset about the letter or Ben’s absence.” He began to cower inwardly as her stare intensified.

  “You know about the letter?”

  “He had it with him.”

  “What did he say?” Aubrey waved a waft of smoke away with her hand.

  Cort set his knife down. “He didn’t say anything.” He couldn’t tell her he was sleeping. Would that hurt her as it should? Cort didn’t want to inflict one ounce of hurt on Aubrey. “But he wasn’t in any rush to come looking, so you don’t need to worry.”

  She narrowed her eyes at him, then relented to a frown. “I hope you are right. I don’t need him coming here and bossing me into debt.” Her words sharpened with threat. He half expected her to wave a fist in the direction of her home state of Kansas.

  “You are wise to get away.” Cort sighed and continued whittling. He’d incurred an insurmountable debt from his own family. Maybe not financial debt, but emotional and criminal. A ludicrous amount that would no doubt follow him to the grave.

  Aubrey cleared her throat. “I’m almost finished with my dugout.”

  Cort stopped for a moment. “Really?”

  “Yes.” She wrapped her arms around her legs, resting her chin on her knee. “Thought you were going to help me move Ben today.” She scrunched her nose, opened her mouth, then clamped it shut.

  “I’m sorry. I thought I’d get started on my own soddie, too. Our neighbors were in need of my help.” Pride wrestled with disappointment as he thought about his day spent helping the Hickses and the Jessups, even though he had wanted to help Aubrey most. He tried to convince himself that he felt loyal to her because she was his landowner and not because she was the object of his growing admiration.

  Curls of wood fell to the ground as he continued with his knife.

  Aubrey slowly rose. “I hope everything is okay with our neighbors.”

  “They are fine. Just needed an extra pair of hands.”

  From the corner of his eye, he watched her boots inch closer. He tried to concentrate on his whittling, but his pulse was too distracting.

  “What are you making?” Her soft question halted his movement. This woman’s gentle side cropped up again, just like yesterday. She’d whispered away the fortress around his heart, exposing it to a fierce desire to battle any future doom. But he had no control over whatever might come his way. So he must guard his expectations.

  He sighed. What a conflicted life he might lead on this prairie. But there was nowhere else he’d rather be.

  “Just getting started right now.” Cort worked the knife. “I sit and think, and pray, and a shape comes to me.”

  “What are you thinking about, then?” She scooted next to him. Not too close, but close enough that he could smell faint lavender on the night breeze.

  He nearly spilled the truth. My heart, you, this constant turmoil your wondrous ways put me through. “A fortress.”

  “Oh.” She leaned on her hand and rested her head on her shoulder as she watched him.

  He worked diligently on the piece, trying to resist the nagging urge to study her hair mingling in a long glorious wave among the tall grass.

  “I often pray when I sew. Especially if I know the person I am sewing for,” she said.

  “Might get you to do some of my sewing.” He chuckled.

  Her chocolate-brown eyes snagged him with a straight shot of scrutiny. “And what would you have me pray for?”

  Cort frowned at her obvious distrust. “Do you usually inquire about your customer’s dirty laundry?”

  Her mouth fell, and then she snapped it shut in a tight line. “I hoped to get away from dishonest men. Ran across the Cherokee Strip to do so.” She bit her lip, widening her eyes.

  “Have I been dishonest?”

  “You’ve got secrets, Cort. That’s all. I’ve told you mine.”

  His jaw tightened. “My secret will hurt more people than me if I tell it. I’m not being dishonest, just careful.” He thrust his knife into the wood and tossed it to the ground. “I thought you said you trusted me?” Why did he care what she thought?

  “It sounds like you don’t trust me—with your secret, I mean.” Aubrey’s words stabbed him like his knife in the unfinished piece. She was right. He couldn’t trust anyone with the truth, especially someone like Aubrey. She was an honest woman who’d feel obliged to tell the truth to the authorities if they found him.

  “It’s a burden you don’t want to bear.” His fortres
s walls began to rise around his heart again. Keep it to business, Cort.

  He walked over to his pack and pulled out his wallet. He’d be a good tenant and build this business relationship.

  “Here’s my first payment for rent.” He handed her money. “You can trust me while I’m here.”

  Aubrey blinked in surprise and took it. “Thank you, Mr. Stan—Cort.” She held out her other hand and he helped her up. Her forehead was just to his chin. A silent inhalation of her flowery scent prodded him to step back.

  “I will not ask of your secret again. You have my word.” She placed her hand on his arm. Her soft touch chipped away at his sound decision to remain businesslike. He tried to ignore her eyes by scattering his attention across her cheekbones, her nose, her lips—no, not her lips. He ended up staring at her chin. The firelight tinted her ivory skin with its glow, tempting him to peek at its showcase caught in her brown pools. They danced with an amber shine.

  His hand covered hers. Her unflinching face lured a rush of warmth in his chest. No. He mustn’t let his heart control him. If this were any other time in his life, Aubrey would be the woman that would make his future bright again. He’d have never allowed the shenanigans of his family to jeopardize life with such a beauty.

  Why would God give him the land and the woman at such a time like this?

  A blush deeper than burning coals filled Aubrey’s cheeks and her eyebrows tilted with uncertainty. Did she also wrestle with the same current that now pounded in his ears?

  “Aubrey.”

  Her lips parted slightly, and she questioned him with a steeper tilt of her brow. He rubbed his jaw, trying to keep his free hand occupied. It seemed to have a mind of its own, wanting desperately to pull her face closer and feel the tenderness of her glistening lips. Her now-golden eyes danced with his own.

  “Good night, Aubrey.” He jerked away and forced his boots in the direction of his dugout. His face was red-hot, as was the blood in his veins. The torment of his past had won this time, but could he continue his resistance to an impossible hope?