When No Doesn't Cut It
Page 25
“Do you like it out here,” Damien asked. “Well, what you’ve seen so far?”
“Yes, it’s lovely. But then I’ve always preferred natural settings to the city.”
“Could you see yourself living out here permanently - at the pack house, I mean?”
So that was Damien’s plan. He was going to leave Scott out here to live, while he went back to his club in the city. It took every ounce of willpower Scott had to reply calmly.
“I like it well enough. I would have to have some sheds built for my cars and a workshop, but I could live out here.” Stay fucking calm. Don’t let this infuriating man know how much he is hurting you. The mantra played over and over in his head as he forced himself to be still.
“I don’t think you’ll have too much time to work on cars, my mate.” Damien laughed as he spoke. “I don’t plan on replacing Jacob as the liaison between the pack and myself, and I figure with you being Alpha Mate, the pack - especially the women and children - would be more inclined to speak to you, than they would to me.”
Okay, it was official. Forget hurting. Scott was absolutely fuming. Not only was this poor excuse for a mate going to move back to the city and leave him here on pack grounds, but he was going to get Scott to take over the day to day running of the pack. Scott had never thought that Damien was lazy, but shit and fucking hell, this type of arrogance was something Scott didn’t appreciate - not one bit.
“Well, you’ll be busy with your club, I suppose, so someone will need to be here for the pack,” Scott said, his words clipped and short.
Scott could see Damien frowning in the dim light, but the man replied, “I thought I told you, I was going to get Lucius and Vincent to keep running the club. They are doing a really good job and they can keep on top of the business side of things.”
Pushing himself to his feet, Scott paced towards the water’s edge. His anger was threatening to consume him. Now his mate was talking about having more free time, which he would have in spades if he wasn’t running the club, but he didn’t want to spend that time with Scott. Forget about Damien not knowing how he felt. Fucking forget about tip-toeing around this bear of a man. Scott was pissed off at his mate and it was about time this idiot knew it. He opened up his mind link and let his anger and frustration pour into Damien. He knew the man had caught it, because Damien jumped slightly and then frowned as if he didn’t know what was going on.
Turning to face Damien head on, painfully aware his erection was clearly evident in his loose fitting sweats, Scott yelled. “And what are you going to be doing, Damien? If I’m running the pack, and Lucius and Vincent are running the club, what are you going to be doing, swanking around in your fucking penthouse apartment in the city with nothing better to do? Are you going back to play with your subs? Is that why you want me left out here at the compound? So you can go back to your meaningless fucking and forget you even have a mate?”
/~/~/~/~/
For a moment all Damien could do was hang his head, completely stunned at what he could feel and hear from the ranting man in front of him. The power of Scott’s anger and frustration in his head was almost tangible, and guaranteed to give him a headache. But it was Scott’s words that didn’t make sense. Hadn’t Damien explained that he wanted them both to live out here together? To build up the pack with more families and solid values and to have a life together that wasn’t dictated to by the demands of the club.
Quickly thinking over their conversation, Damien thumped himself because, nope, he hadn’t mentioned they would be living together at all. No wonder Scott was mad at him. And Damien could see it clearly through the mind link. Scott, confused and upset when Damien insisted they go on a run instead of following through on those amazing kisses; Scott’s shame at crying over his mother and what Damien must think of him. And there, underneath the anger, hurt and frustration, the tangible link of arousal. Well, at least he knew that his mate still wanted him and he could work with that.
“Well, answer me, damn it. What are you going to be doing with yourself when you have all of this free time?”
Hearing his mate yell again, Damien raised his head and met Scott’s angry eyes, calmly and clearly.
“I’m going to be living here with you, full time. I thought that was obvious, but I probably should have made that clear,” he said quietly.
As Damien watched, the anger drained out of Scott like an emptying sink full of water once the plug has been pulled, leaving confusion and arousal. His mate looked absolutely stunning even with those baggy sweats hiding the bulk of muscles Damien knew he had. Feeling his own body respond, Damien pushed those thoughts to the back of his mind. Scott needed more than a solid fuck, although he would get that before they left this clearing - Damien had specifically made sure there was lube in the bag he arranged to have left by the stream earlier that day. But for now, the two men needed to get their communication skills on track because honestly the pair of them, and the way they waffled around with each other was becoming annoying, frustrating and causing far more friction than two mates should have - and not in a good way.
Scott had started pacing, backwards and forwards in front of Damien, treating the man to some impressive leg muscle moves - and the way Scott’s ass bunched and flexed with each step was art in motion. Damien quickly focused on Scott’s face before he did something stupid like jump the man before they had finished talking.
“Scott, when I asked you to come on this run, I did it because I wanted to show you some of the lovely spots we have on pack land. And I asked you to shift because I wanted to talk to you about moving us here to the pack house permanently. I obviously wasn’t very clear about how I went about it, and I’m sorry for that, but you know when it comes to relationship matters, I plain suck at it.”
Shaking his head, Scott came over and straddled Damien, sitting down in his lap. Leaning into Damien’s chest he murmured softly, “I didn’t mean to be so angry with you. I do try and keep my stronger emotions to myself.” Then he gave a lick across Damien’s neck and Damien damn near yelped in surprise and pleasure.
“You shouldn’t have to, mate of mine. You need to keep our mind link… open,” Damien’s last word squeaked out because Scott had nudged Damien’s sweat top aside with his nose and was nibbling his mating mark. The sensation went right down through Damien’s cock to his balls, which tightened up in anticipation.
“I’m not sure you’re ready to see what’s in my head, Damien,” Scott said quietly, pulling back so he could see Damien’s face. Damien searched Scott’s eyes, and their mind link, struggling to find what Scott didn’t want him to see. Scott frowned a little, but he allowed the intrusion. Damien could sense a new type of resolve in Scott, as though the man had decided that whatever it was he was keeping secret, had to be shared if they had any hope of moving forward with their life together.
And then there it was - suddenly front and center in Scott’s mind, as if Scott had pulled it out of the shadows and thrust it at Damien, forcing the man to see. Damien gasped, because he had never, in his life, ever seen or felt anything so wondrous, pure, all encompassing and totally amazing. Scott loved him. Despite all of their hassles, conflicts and misunderstandings, Scott loved him with all that he was, and the feeling that washed over Damien was so powerful, so fucking perfect, Damien’s whole body shook with the intensity of it.
Immediately, Scott stood up and moved off of Damien, walking down to the water’s edge and staring down into the rapids. Damien missed the connection with Scott’s warm body immediately, but he couldn’t miss the way Scott’s arms wrapped around his own chest as if he was holding himself together. There was something else there lurking in Scott’s mind, hiding behind the love that was still clearly evident. Fear. Damien’s mind searched for the source of it - fear of rejection, fear of never being enough for Damien, and fear of never being loved in return. Oh fuck. Shawn had been right. Scott honestly believed that Damien would never love him - that his mate wasn’t capable of having th
at type of feeling.
This was not the time for Damien to be sorting out his own feelings, he understood that much at least. Scott was clearly uncomfortable with sharing his love with his mate, and that type of feeling had to be nipped in the bud, immediately. Swiftly getting to his feet, Damien took just two steps to get to Scott. Pulling the resisting man into his arms, Damien held on tight, refusing to let Scott get away from him.
“Don’t ever be afraid of showing your feelings for me,” he whispered into Scott’s ear. “Your love is the most amazing gift - something no one has ever given me before. I’m totally humbled that you feel so strongly for me, and you’ve absolutely no idea how happy your love makes me feel.”
“But it’s not something you will ever return, is it Damien?”
Sighing against Scott’s neck, Damien tried to think of what to say. He cared deeply for Scott, and couldn’t bear the thought of being parted from the man ever, but he had no idea if that was love. And he had too much integrity to give Scott false words just to make him feel better. His mate deserved his honesty in all things.
“I care more for you than anyone in the longest time,” he said hesitantly. “Remember, we were going to have a talk about, you know, why I don’t willingly bottom for anyone?” Scott nodded and relaxed against him and Damien tightened his hold so he could appreciate the lines of his mate’s body against his.
“It’s all tied up with that. The reason I don’t know if I can love someone again. I made a vow, fuck, 140 years ago that I would never love anyone again.”
Hearing Scott’s little gasp, Damien felt the shaft of pain in his own heart as it obviously powered through Scott.
“But that doesn’t mean I won’t love you,” he tried again. Planting his feet firmly, Damien turned Scott in his arms so the two men were facing each other. Damien could see flickers of indecision and confusion running across Scott’s face, and he could feel through the mind link that Scott was desperately trying to be understanding, pushing his hurt at Damien’s admission aside.
“I know now, my vow was stupid and I’ve given that up at least. But, lover, you have to understand, I wasn’t raised with love. I’ve never allowed anyone to get anywhere close enough to me, to love or be loved in return. You’re the first for me in that respect. The first in 140 years. It’s just going to take me some time, that’s all.”
“That must have been so incredibly lonely for you,” Scott whispered as he stroked the muscles on Damien’s chest.
“I didn’t know any different,” Damien said trying to shrug off his mate’s pity. “I built a strong pack. I have a solid business. I make more money than I’ll ever spend. It’s not been a bad life.”
“That’s not pity, love,” Scott said just as quietly, sensing Damien’s concerns through their mind link. His fingers were now tracing the muscles in Damien’s abdomen and Damien shivered as licks of pleasure ran through his body. “I’m empathizing with you, which is totally different. You are such an amazing man in every single way. To think you’ve been alone for decades before I was even born, is sad, that’s all.”
“I must’ve been waiting for you,” Damien rumbled. Scott’s fingers were dipping lower, yes. Damien slid his hands down to Scott’s finely shaped ass, squeezing and pulling the man closer. Two hot, solid cocks bumped each other through the sweats and both men groaned at the sensation. Deciding that there had been enough talking for one day, Damien bent his head and took Scott in a scorching kiss. He might not know if he loved the man, but he would pour every ounce of what he did feel into kissing his mate. Knowing that Scott responded with love just heightened the sensation.
His mate loved him! Scott loved him. And if he loved him then the man would never leave him. For the first time in his life Damien felt safe with another person and the feeling was exhilarating. Not pausing in his kissing, Damien ripped the sweats from Scott’s legs and back, leaving the man naked except for a few tattered remnants of cloth, clinging to where Damien and Scott were joined together.
“I have to be inside of you,” Damien growled against Scott’s lips. “Wanted to take it slow. Wanted to love on you so bad here on our pack grounds, but I can’t wait. I need you,” his last words spoken as he pushed his fingers against Scott’s entrance.
Scott grinned and pulled back from Damien’s grasp. “You’re over dressed, lover,” he said as he slipped down to the ground, rolling onto his hands and knees and presenting his perfect ass for Damien’s use. Damien damn near came on the spot. Grabbing the bag, that was still laying where Damien had dropped it earlier, Damien rooted around until his fingers seized on the bottle of lube. Fishing it out, Damien moved over to where Scott was waiting, his back muscles gleaming under the last of the moonlight.
“Roll over, mate. I want to see you,” Damien growled as he slopped lube all over his fingers and cock. There was no finesse in his actions. Just a hungering need to get Scott prepared to take his aching cock as quickly as possible. Less than two minutes later Damien was sliding home, into his mate, and as Damien felt the heat of Scott’s ass enclose him, rippling along his length like waves of molten silk, he felt complete.
/~/~/~/~/
Arching his back down into the ground, Scott thrust up his hips as Damien’s heat slide home, the man’s balls slapping his ass with a resounding thwack. Damien loomed above him, his silver eyes intense in the waning moonlight, his long hair falling past his shoulders, shrouding the two men in a cocoon of closeness. Scott could feel his mate’s powerful back muscles ripple and pulse under his hands and he lodged his legs around Damien’s hips to bring his lover as close as possible. For a moment the two men stilled; Damien’s eyes were boring into his as though he was looking into his soul.
Scott kept his eyes open, purely and simply because now he had nothing to hide from his mate. Damien knew of his love and accepted it, and for the moment, that would have to be enough. Besides, Scott adored Damien’s face. His strength, his handsome features, and the feral light that had begun to flare in those eyes that held him captive. Fuck.
“Move,” Scott said urgently, as he pushed his hips up to get Damien started. That one word ignited Damien’s body and he started to thrust. He started out long, slow, and deep, but as Scott’s arousal grew, Scott pushed back against him, urging his lover to go harder, deeper and for fucks sake faster. As Damien thrusts increased in pace and depth, Scott could feel the coiled power in his mate’s back, and he sensed the deep need in Damien, to get closer, to reach deeper, and above all, to take Scott to heights he’d never felt before.
Already flying, Scott reveled in the strength of his mate. He loved the full feeling of Damien’s cock in his ass, the way Damien made him feel cherished as he loomed above him - all of the powerful Alpha’s focus was on him, only him. As Damien’s abdomen brushed against his hard cock again and again, Scott cried out - so close to coming, so fucking close, but he couldn’t quite…
Damien lowered his head, his long hair brushing across Scott’s face, immersing him in his warm brandy scent. All of a sudden he felt Damien’s teeth in his mating mark and that was the trigger he needed. Thrusting his hips up one more time, Scott came, his spunk shooting in waves across his stomach, Damien’s name falling from his lips. Damien kept pounding through Scott’s release, his huge cock cementing Scott to the ground below, his eyes never wavering from Scott’s face.
As Scott came back to earth, he looked into Damien’s eyes and then raised himself up, his mouth hovering by Damien’s neck. With a slight tilt of his neck, Damien submitted and Scott bit deep and true. With a shout, Damien’s cock swelled deep inside Scott and the big man came, howling Scott’s name to the moon as his come coated Scott’s insides.
As Damien fought to get his breathing under control, he leaned over and panted into Scott’s ear, “you’re everything to me.”
Grinning Scott reached up and brushed Damien’s mouth with his lips.
“That’s a good start,” he whispered.
Chapter Twenty Nine
In the meantime, Scott had been talking with Malacai and other pack members to try and determine what sorts of things the people living at the compound would like to see done differently. Scott was really keen to see how the rights of women and children could be improved within the pack. He had been horrified to find that some of the laws relating to women in particular, and the children as they got older, had not been changed since Damien had become Alpha a century before.
Laws that regulated a woman’s right to work outside of the pack, restricted schooling and the right to choose who to mate with. It was even pack law that Damien be the one to take a woman’s virginity before she married her mate. Damien was quick to assure Scott that he had never implemented that law for any reason, although he did confess that during his early days as Alpha, many of the pack elders of the time had tried to get Damien to mate with a female, even though his sexual preference was a well known secret within the pack.
When Scott tried to talk to Damien about women’s rights, Damien had given him a history lesson on the issue and how it had been in the late 1800s and early 1900s. Then Scott had given him one on how things had changed since then. Although it was a relatively lighthearted discussion, and resulted in an excellent blow job from his Alpha when Damien was proven wrong, Scott spent a lot of time thinking about how he could improve things for women and their offspring on pack grounds.