Access All Awkward

by Beth Garrod

  “We thought you might need these.” Tegan smiled.

  Rach passed me a Chomp. “Love snack-tually.”

  We’d been messaging all day, but they’d never told me they were going to pop round. I loved my friends.

  Rach squeezed past me. “Oops, sorry!” She dropped a packet of Wotsits, and I bent to pick them up. “Is he here yet?”

  “Yeah, in the kitchen.”

  “Cooooool.” She headed straight there, although she still gasped “Adam” when she saw him.

  I laughed and gave Teeg a hug. “I hope she never changes.”

  By the time we got back to the kitchen the reams of paper about courses and pamphlets about colleges were covered in crisps. Maybe it was a sign.

  I loved everyone being here for me, it meant the world to me, but it couldn’t hide my rising panic about the decision I had to make.

  The doorbell rang again.

  This time Mum shouted down.

  “It’s for meeeeee!” She tromped down the stairs, jujing her hair. “A client!”

  I looked at the others apologetically. “Prepare to shut off your ears and pretend you can’t hear what’s going on in my house.” They nervous laughed, giving each other glances I didn’t understand. And minutes later I realized why. Because when Mum shouted for me to bring her tea through, I recognized exactly who her new client was.

  Sitting on the sofa was Mr Lutas.

  “Oh?!” I didn’t mean to react quite like that, but felt it was legitimate. “You’re wearing socks.”

  I don’t know why I said this. Why was I obsessed with his feet today? Why wouldn’t he be wearing socks?

  “I am, yes.” Mr Lutas pushed his glasses up his nose and glanced down. “Pantone 1505.” I think that was his way of saying orange. He looked up at my mum. “Would you…?”

  She nodded. “’Course.” And picked up her tea. “I’ll be in the kitchen if you need me.”

  What was going on?

  “Why don’t you sit down, Bella?” He sounded more gentle than normal.

  Had the world shifted? Why was my old art teacher offering me a seat in my own home?

  I sat down slowly, suspiciously. “What’s going on?”

  He pulled a folded bit of paper out of his pocket. The newspaper with my pictures on.

  “I’ve got a question for you.” I looked at him, willing him to get to the point. Was he about to ask me if I was OK with him doing laughter yoga with my mum?! If this was how weird life got after school, I wanted to go back, please.

  “Go on…”

  He unfolded the paper and smoothed it out across our coffee table. “Do you think you could cope with rrrre-sitting your Maths GCSE in November?”

  “Sorry – I’m not with you.”

  He cleared his throat.

  “I’ve been speaking a lot to your motherrr today.” So she’d lied about having a “business crisis”?! “Because I’ve had a word with Worcestershire College. I sent them thrrrough your porrrtfolio for another look, and with all this extrrra materrrrial –” he pointed at the paper “– if you were able to commit to studying for – and passing – your maths re-sit in November, they…” He paused. “Would be willing to offer you a place.”

  There was only one thing to do.

  Yell a massive “YEEESSSS”, and give Mr Lutas our second awkward hug of the day. So much emotion today! Especially when I finally released him and saw that he looked almost as happy as me.

  “Mr Lutas, you are an utterrr legend!!!” He laughed. In five years I’d never heard him laugh. Today was historic in so many ways.

  “No one has ever called me that beforrre.” He scratched his noise, embarrassed. It was almost endearing.

  “Well, they should?! You’ve made my life!”

  He wrinkled his massive brows. “So it’s a yes, then?” I nodded triple-speed. “I need to give them an answer by five, but your mother wanted me to ask you in person. Said it wasn’t her decision.”

  “Tell them, tell them, tell them! And thank you, thank you, thank you.”

  He raised his shoulders. “Well, it’s your talent I don’t want to go to waste. Just don’t let me down?”

  “I won’t. I promise.” And I meant it.

  “I’ll make the call, then.” He picked up his phone (I tried not to react that he had a picture of a painting of a pineapple as his screen saver), and I dashed to tell Mum and the others.

  But when I pushed open the kitchen door, none of them were sitting at the table.

  Rach and Jo were standing on the kitchen chairs waving their arms, Mum and Tegan were by the door pulling party poppers, and Adam was in the middle with a balloon in his hand.

  “CONGRATS!!!” they all yelled together.

  Mumbles even had a tiny dog party hat on.

  They’d all known and had turned up to surprise and congratulate me in person.

  I didn’t know what to do. Except grin and grin and grin. Not just because I’d managed to scrape my way into college, but because I had the best friends and family and boyfriend in the world. Even my dog – who was now glued to my leg, like she knew there was good news – was next level.

  So I did the only thing I could think of.

  Picked up my new camera, and took a photo of this moment so I could remember it for the rest of my life.

  ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

  I always read these bits of a book first. Is that weird? Probably. But if you do too, then know you are not alone.

  To everyone else that’s taken a more traditional chronological approach, you’ve already read a lot of words, so I’ll try and keep this short.

  Wonderful Lauren, you not only make books way better, you make writing them fun. Thank you.

  Gemma – best agent in the world. And so, so much more. Thank you for everything.

  Pete, sorry this book made you leave the country. Thanks for all your help and DIY knowledge. Olivia – we went on tour! It was awesome – just like you. Jamie, every single cover has been gorgeous, I can’t say thank you enough (*insert celebration emoji here* Or don’t, cos someone would have to design it). Chie – danke! And everyone at Scholastic, thanks for being the nicest team and making me feel so welcome and supported.

  A massive tent-based thanks to Pam and Ben. My first ever festival dream-team. We picked that litter good and proper. Glastonbury is still my happy place thanks to you. Pam – I’m forever grateful for your never-ending patience and friendship, especially when I was writing this. You always seem to know when it’s needed the most. As do the equally amazing Tina and James. Thanks for being you.

  A big 2 a.m. festival hug to all the amazing people that have supported Bella and me along the way. Rosanna – writing buddy, perpetual cheerleader. Jess – human Google, total inspiration. Dan, fellow tea towel lover. Julie – icon (say no more). Lucy R – the OG, thanks for absolutely everything. Matt, Mikey, Katie, Vivek, Lyndon, Jono, David, Robyn, Holly, Lou, Yasmine, Lisa, Jen, Aiss, Tom, Becky, Sarah, Alistair B, Smithy and Anya (global supporting superstars) – thanks for all the things, big and small. Barbara please keep an eye on Kevin – he’s officially a bookshop renegade.

  And a massive thank you to the incredibly supportive authors and bookish peeps I’ve met – Chelley, Chloe C, Neil, Jim, Kimi, Fiona, Alice B, team YALC and all the creative and dedicated bloggers who’ve made things even more exciting and a bit less scary (extra-big wave at Beth, Jo, Zoe, and Lois). Special funny shout-out to Simon, Perdita, Chloe S and Stephanie. And of course Team Cooper. Wow. Look at you go.

  Chris. You make every adventure feel possible.

  And my family, who mean the world to me. Becca, my wonderful sister. I won a best friend for life. Moomin and Daddles – a never-ending backbone of support from day one. And of course Ian and Rose. Rose – I’m your biggest fan. Keep sparkling every day – being kind is cool.

  But most of all to all the people who have followed Bella, and got in touch to say they know how she feels. This one’s for you.

  Als
o available

  I, Bella Fisher, am absolutely

  WINNING at FAILING at life.

  I, Bella Fisher, am feeling as cool,

  calm and collected as ever.

  AKA: NOT AT ALL.

  Scholastic Children’s Books

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  SCHOLASTIC and associated logos are trademarks and or registered trademarks of Scholastic Inc.

  First published in the UK by Scholastic Ltd, 2018

  This electronic edition published by Scholastic Ltd, 2018

  Text copyright © Beth Garrod, 2018

  The right of Beth Garrod to be identified as the

  author of this work has been asserted by her.

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  eISBN 978 1407 19178 2

  A CIP catalogue record for this work is available from the British Library.

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  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, incidents and dialogues are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual people, living or dead, events or locales is entirely coincidental.

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