Wasted Vows

by Colleen Charles

  “Ally, you just called Gabe your boyfriend. Please go back and start at the beginning. You know I’ll be honest if I think you’re being crazy.” Kelly moved to perch on the end of the desk and tilted her head to one side. “Tell me the truth and don’t sugar coat it.”

  “I never told Gabe that Matthew and I had been serious, or that I can’t get pregnant. He found out last night.”

  Kelly’s face paled. “Matthew told him? Were you there?”

  “Yeah.” I told her about him crashing in my apartment like a crazy person, scaring me half to death then pissing Gabe off to the point that my fireman savior had taken a run at my ex. How he’d destroyed a perfectly good evening. Like he always destroyed everything.

  “You seriously need to take a restraining order out against that irrational stalker. That kind of harassment is illegal. Cop or no cop. Actually, it’s even worse because he’s in law enforcement. Whatever happened to protect and serve?” Kelly sipped from her own cup of coffee and shook her head. “I’m sure you could get one.”

  “I doubt it. Who would believe me? I mean, there’s no proof that he’s been harassing me. No texts or calls or anything. It’s just him, showing up whenever he likes and making me and Gabe miserable. I think he’s trying to harass Gabe into physically assaulting him so he can get Gabe fired. Or worse. I guess I never realized that a police officer could be so corrupt. It reminds me of that movie, Safe Haven.”

  “I guess,” she said, scratching her head. “Do you really think Matthew’s behavior would escalate to the point that he’d try to harm you? Or, Gabe?”

  “I think it could. But who really knows. He seems completely off the rails. After Matthew ran out, missing a chunk of his cheap button down, Gabe just left and he —” I broke off and tried to swallow past the lump in my dry throat, “he hasn’t answered any of my calls.” I pressed my lips together and shook my head. “Things were going so well. So well that I thought maybe I could be more than a friend and trust him again, but now …”

  Kelly tapped her teeth with the edge of her cup. “This isn’t making any sense. Like there’s more to the story. Something else he’s not telling you.”

  “I know. My gut tells me something isn’t right.”

  “What are you going to do now?” Kelly asked, narrowing her eyes.

  I lifted a shoulder. “I’m not sure. I need to talk to Gabe but I can’t do that if he’s avoiding me. I wonder why he’s avoiding me?” I asked with a grimace.

  “Well, I’m going to pray for some closure for you. You’ve been all over the place since Gabe came into your life. You need to get your head right so you can focus on the bakery. I have a feeling about that place. In fact, all of the cupcakes you gave us to sell here flew off the shelves in record time, as well as all your business cards. People can’t seem to get enough of them. And that makes Pat really happy.”

  “That’s so exciting,” I said and couldn’t help but give Kelly a quick hug in celebration of our joint success. “The bakery’s doing really well and business has been picking up each day. I even have some special orders for winter weddings. I’m so glad that trend for an individual cake for each wedding guest took off like wildfire. If it continues, my summer is going to be explosive. I stopped long enough to take a sip of the cappuccino. “Oh my god, this is good. Have you ever thought about selling one or two of your specialty coffees in the bakery? I know my customers would love it. Especially, my bridge club ladies.”

  “Extra hazelnut syrup and real organic cream from my home state,” Kelly said with another wink. “I figured you’d need a little extra pick me up for our chat. By the way, that’s a great idea about the coffee. How about I talk it over with Pat and get him right on it? I’m sure he could bring over a large urn every morning with a different flavor. We could drive business to each other since the two stores complement each other so well.”

  I blushed and bowed my head. “You’re right. Let’s focus on business. I’m behaving like a child over this guy. Not the savvy, self-sufficient woman I am.”

  “I don’t blame you because he’s sexy as hell. First time I saw him, I wanted to lift up his shirt and lick …” Kelly licked the foam off the top of her cup suggestively, then chuckled. “It will all work out in the end. Have faith.”

  “You did not just do that.” I grabbed her in a one-armed hug and rested my head against hers for a second. “In spite of your suggestive play on words, I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

  “You’d be seriously lacking in the cappuccino department. And that, sister, would be a tragedy.”

  I laughed with her, but I couldn’t kill the creeping dread in my stomach at the mere thought of losing Gabe. Before I even actually had him. “I’d better get back to the bakery. Work to do.”

  We shared another quick hug and I was out of the coffee shop and into the cold street a few minutes later. I grasped the cappuccino in my leather gloves and looked at my bakery just a block down the street, my dream come true. Then I reached into my pocket and brought out my phone.

  I stared at the screen for two minutes as I sipped Kelly’s addictive brew. Blank. Nada. What was wrong with him? What else was he hiding? Then I swept my cold thumb across the screen and searched for Gabe’s number. I dialed and pressed the phone to my ear.

  My stomach leapt at the sound of ringing on the other end.

  But he didn’t pick up.

  Chapter 33

  Gabe

  I sat in my living room, swigging from a bottle of beer and staring at the brown water mark beneath the line of the ceiling against the wall. Piece of shit condo. I could tap into my trust fund and get something better. But I wouldn’t. I didn’t want anything I hadn’t earned myself. Anything purchased with his dirty money.

  No, I’d chosen this apartment because it was far away from my father and close to work and the guys at the fire station. Real down-to-earth people. People who actually cared about me.

  Allegra had called and texted multiple times. I was avoiding her. I didn’t know what the hell to say to ease her pain. The rash of tears had reduced me to a quivering puddle, terrified to tell her the whole sordid truth. Even though I knew I was close to losing what I’d never actually had, I couldn’t reach out. The pain of the finality of her telling me to ‘fuck off’ felt worse than the pain of ignoring her.

  Faith had introduced me to a world of mistrust and looking over my shoulder. A world where I didn’t like how I behaved. Even the man that I was. What with all the randoms floating around her, leeching off her, I’d started to become wary of everyone. But in the past … the desire to win my dad’s approval and love had outweighed the suffering of simply being with Faith. No more.

  “Damn,” I felt like I’d been punched in the gut again so I leaned back and sank deeper into the leather sofa cushions.

  A loud rap at the door jolted me from my self-recriminations. Who the hell was knocking at the door and hadn’t called first? I rose from the sofa, set my beer on a coaster and looked through the peephole.

  Shit.

  Another knock rattled the door and whoever it was on the other side tried the door handle. Stalk much? She must have heard noise on the inside so she wasn’t going away without the face-to-face confrontation she’d came for. Well, she’d get what she was after.

  “What do you want?” I asked as I swung the front door wide and allowed her to step inside the foyer. Jesus. Didn’t this woman have any maternity clothes that fit her? Club wear didn’t look attractive on someone at the end of pregnancy. I was surprised George let her run around in public with her tits hanging out and her pregnant belly exposed.

  “You aren’t happy to see me,” she smirked as she waltzed into the living room uninvited and sank down on my couch. Right next to my open beer bottle. “Can you get me a bottle of water, Gabe?”

  “What do you want?” I repeated, making no move to go to the kitchen and do her bidding.

  “Are you seriously going to let a heavily pregnant woman go without
water?” She crinkled her eyes and glared at me. Let her stare herself into oblivion. I’m not her lackey.

  “Yes.”

  “Come on, sweetheart, we need to talk,” she ignored my slight, then patted the cushion beside her. She glanced around the condo and then turned up her nose at the lack of professionally done décor. I’d been to her place once to pick her up and George had spared no expense in setting up his daughter to live a spoiled life of leisure and ennui.

  “What are you doing here, Faith? I’m not in the mood.” I gritted my teeth, picked up my beer and chose the recliner. Alone.

  “We need to talk about the paternity test.”

  “It wasn’t a request,” I said, “I have every right to ask for a paternity test and I will get one.”

  She lifted an eyebrow. “I beg to differ and so does your father. He knows what’s good for you and that’s me,” she patted her chest, splaying her fingers which sparkled with a massive Cartier ring. A leopard with green emeralds for eyes and spots of glittering diamonds. That damn thing cost four times my annual salary.

  “My father can get fucked,” I announced as I took another long sip, needing the alcoholic fortification simply to deal with her bullshit. Then the ring caught my eye again. “Who did you have to spread your legs for to get that ring, Faith?”

  Faith’s mouth twitched at the corners. “As sexy as you are when you’re deliberately rude, I know that’s not the real Gabe. The sweet nerdy, math whiz that I fell in love with back in high school. Remember, before you became the star of the football team? You would have been rimming the toilet with an epic swirly if it wasn’t for me. I saved you, Gabe.”

  What did she want, a damn medal? Maybe a spotlight and streamers?

  I finished the last sip and then slammed the bottle down. “I’m not going to marry you because my father told me to.”

  “Why not?” Faith pouted. “We’ve been together for years. You’re not the same man without me. Just look at how negative, emotional and surly you’ve become since you started sleeping with that white trash whore.”

  You’re right, Faith. I’m not the same man because of you. You make me worse. A shell of the confident, proud and loyal man I was before I made the mistake of fucking you. Fucking my friend.

  “Don’t say another word about Allegra. Don’t even speak her name or I’ll throw you out into the hallway, pregnant or not.”

  She cleared her throat and scooted forward on the cushion, gripping the bottom of her belly. “This baby, your baby, needs a father.”

  “If that’s my baby, he’ll have a father.”

  Faith gave a triumphant grin.

  “But, you will not have a husband. At least, I won’t be your husband.”

  Faith’s face fell, her mouth went slack for a moment, then tightened up again. She leaned towards me and reached over to grasp my forearm. I couldn’t sink back any further into my recliner without tipping it backward and ending up in a heap on my area rug. She ran the pads of her fingers over the light hairs on my arm. Her touch made me want to blow chunks. “Gabe, be serious for a second. Think of the money we could make out of this. Your father —”

  “You’re a shameless bitch. How can you think for one second I would prostitute myself for my father’s money? That I would put my own son in the same position that I’ve been in for years? Nothing that’s mine will ever be beholden to that bastard,” I used my calm but deadly serious tone as I rose from the chair and went to stand at the floor to ceiling windows. This condo and the amazing view, one of the only luxuries I still allowed myself on my fireman’s salary. I couldn’t hear any sounds behind me and hoped she’d decided to take that as her cue to leave. But when I glanced over my shoulder, Faith still sat there. Immobile.

  Tense seconds passed before she spoke again with a soft and imploring voice. “Gabe, you’re not thinking straight, so I’ll leave you alone for tonight. Just think of the amazing family we could have together. With our son,” she murmured.

  No we couldn’t. Because my heart is closed where you’re concerned.

  I felt like that same heart was being ripped from my chest. I didn’t even know who she was anymore. If I’d ever even known her at all. “And all the money you’d make out of the deal when my father pays you off,” I replied. My voice lowered. “Get out of my apartment, Faith. I’ve had enough for today.”

  She rose slowly and lifted her palms into the air. “All right, I know when I’m not wanted.” Now she was going to play the guilt card? Too damn bad for her because she’d already played it so many times it had lost all of its value. “But I’ll be back tomorrow and the next day, until you see sense about this. So prepare yourself.”

  “I won’t be here.” I’d go check into a damn hotel if that’s what it took to avoid her and her drama. The results of the paternity test couldn’t come fast enough.

  She paused in the doorway and looked at me, eyes brimming with crocodile tears. “I won’t let you give up on us, Gabe.”

  I turned and looked out my windows again. Silent.

  She opened the door, and the soft click of the latch let me know I was again alone with my thoughts. And emotions. The ones I didn’t want to feel but always came rising to the surface like a hurricane of distasteful feelings whenever Faith was present.

  I walked to the kitchen counter and leaned on it for a second, staring at the half-empty fridge. My iPhone buzzed in my front pocket. Damn it. She wasn’t even in her town car yet and she was already trying to feed me another dose of her toxic bullshit?

  Allegra’s gorgeous face flashed on the screen. I’d snapped the photo of her in the bakery making cupcakes. She’d looked so happy; her face glowing and passionate. I hadn’t been able to resist making it my notification for any incoming call or message from her. She’d tried calling me quite a few times since I’d held her while she cried about Matthew. I felt so impotent because I hadn’t been able to protect her. Hadn’t been able to exact revenge against that despicable prick.

  I hit the green button to talk.

  Allegra, I’m falling in love with you, but I’m afraid you’ll reject me if you find out the truth about me.

  “Hello.”

  Chapter 34

  Ally

  I popped the cork on the bottle of wine and poured it into a massive glass so fast it almost sloshed over the rim. It was my favorite glass. Pink ballerina shoes painted on the side with rhinestones glued around the stem. When I was little, I’d dreamed of twirling on the stage in my pointe shoes. Until my mother had burst my fantasy bubble when she told me that ballerinas couldn’t be five foot two with huge boobs and an ass. I stared into the Chardonnay like it could commiserate with me. Could give advice on what to do about Gabe.

  Winter had officially arrived and the blustery winds and snow had kept me inside tonight in spite of Kelly’s invitation to join her at a gallery opening. Wine and cheese and all that. Wine. I needed the wine but not the cheese because this was a booze on an empty stomach kind of night.

  I drank deeply, then scrunched up my eyes to appreciate the vintage. In my sorrow, I’d sprung for a bottle of Kendall Jackson as opposed to wine in a box. Not the top vintage, but a damn good one. I let the fruity mixture roll over my tongue. Delicious. And since I had nowhere to be, I could polish off the entire bottle. And pass out.

  I looked at my phone on the counter and bit my bottom lip. Ever since our brief conversation this morning, I’d had a pit in the middle of my stomach that felt like I’d swallowed a boulder. He’d been cordial. Warm even. But the spark was gone. The longing and the chemistry. I felt like Faith Callahan had blown my entire love life to smithereens. Thank God my bakery was rocking it. I’d picked up another wedding this afternoon and it was for two hundred and fifty people.

  My iPhone’s screen lit up with an unknown number. I snatched up the device and swiped my finger along the green icon, heart pounding like crazy. If it was her, all bets were off. I wouldn’t listen to one more slur by that sanctimonious bitch.
>
  I rammed the phone against my ear, winced, then sucked in a ragged breath laced with fear. “Hello?”

  Please, God, let it be Gabe, calling from someone else’s phone.

  “Hi, baby girl, how are you doing?” Her voice couldn’t have been more poisonous if it were injected with snake venom. I didn’t hang up. She only called when she wanted something. Something I didn’t have inside me to give.

  “Mom,” I said. “It’s been what, five years? Last time we talked, it was from behind bars.”

  “Yeah, thanks for calling Legal Aid, by the way,” she replied, dripping with sarcasm. “You know damn well I’m innocent. I never took any heroin across the border to Mexico. I’m still here, by the way.”

  The DEA had found the powder in all of her bodily cavities. The fact that she continued to deny it just made her delusional. And pathetic. She’d appealed to Matthew too who had promised to help her but then laughed behind her back about what a psychotic junkie she was.

  “What do you need now, Mom?” I paced back and forth, twirling the wine glass between my fingers and staring at the light twinkling through the gold liquid.

  “What does every mother want?”

  “I don’t know? To spend time with their children? Not get arrested for being a drug mule?” I took a big swig of my Chardonnay and coughed on the dry tingle at the back of my throat. “You’ll need to enlighten me because I have no idea why you’re calling today.”

  “Don’t be sarcastic, Ally, it doesn’t suit you.”

  “How would you know what ‘suits’ me?” I countered, awash with so many bad memories I finally sank down into my tapestry armchair.

  “I gave you the childhood I could afford.”

  “You gave me lies, Mother, and I don’t have time for more of them. Now, please, tell me what you want.”