Secrets Of The Knight

by Julia Latham

  The crowd buzzed with excitement, and Archie lunged forward, the thrust of his sword aimed at Tom’s heart. Diana lost her breath in that instant, but Tom easily parried the sword aside and slammed the edge of his blade across Archie’s helm.

  She rode right into the middle of the battle, forcing both men to stumble back.

  Tom had his helm off first, and his face was split with a broad grin. “Diana! You escaped!”

  She gave him a smile, but aimed a scowl at Archie as he removed his helm, and she dismounted. “I was never held captive by anyone, including my brother.”

  Tom took a menacing step forward. “Why the hell did you not simply deny the accusation?” he demanded of Archie.

  “It did not deserve a response,” Archie said coolly, deliberately avoiding Diana’s stern gaze. “I wanted to finish this battle between us once and for all.”

  “And if I really had been kidnapped or hurt,” Diana exclaimed, “you were keeping Tom from helping me!”

  Archie looked only a bit sheepish. “Well, ’tis true, but you’ve always taken care of yourself.”

  She wanted to gape at him. “Did you think I always could, even as a young girl? Did you think that that was the kind of relationship I wanted with my brother? Mayhap I would have enjoyed you occasionally taking care of me!”

  Archie stared at her, his bewilderment giving way to anger. “What do you think I have been doing? This is the man”—he pointed at Tom—“I want to protect you from! And are you thankful? Nay, you are not! You want everything on your own terms.” He tossed his helm onto the ground, and then turned away from her. “Ale for all in the great hall,” he called.

  The disappointed murmurs turned to cheers and the crowd began to flow back toward the keep. Diana followed, leading her horse until she spotted a groom, who took him for her.

  “Take good care of him,” she said tiredly. “He has had a long day.”

  “Doing what?” Tom caught her elbow. “I think you owe me an explanation.”

  “I do,” she said, bracing herself.

  “Then I want to hear it now.” Tom drew her into the abandoned lady’s garden, away from the crowd. “Tell me everything.”

  “Out here?”

  “I cannot wait until the night, when we next have a moment alone. Tell me where you went without leaving word with anyone.”

  “But your armor—”

  “It can wait. Now tell me.”

  She took his hand in hers and squeezed. “I only needed to think, to be alone. I often go for a ride just to be away from everything. I thought I would be home by dinner, but I rode farther than I meant to.”

  “That is all?” he asked, confused.

  For a moment, the ramifications of whatever she chose to tell him weighed her down. Would he accept her, accept what she did for her life’s passion—accept what she’d done to him in the name of duty?

  He was so good, so concerned. She gently caressed his cheek with her fingers, hoping this would not be the last time she did so. She wanted to tell him of her love, but that would only distract him from what he needed to hear.

  “Nay, that is not all,” she said quietly, full of worry and fear and resignation. She looked around, caution long engrained in her. But they were alone. “Four Bladesmen met me to discuss my last assignment.”

  His brows lowered in confusion. “You have not told me of anything other than your mission against my brother. But I know that the League insists on secrecy.”

  “Aye, and that was going to be my excuse to never tell you this, but I cannot marry you with this secret between us.”

  He gripped both of her hands now. “I have been waiting for this, sweetling. Just tell me.”

  “After I…locked you in the dungeon, I received a note from the League, one that had been delayed by bad weather. They informed me that they were sending you here so that I could get to know you, to evaluate you.”

  The puzzlement in his face was slowly changing to wariness. “To evaluate me?” he asked, his voice impassive now.

  She nodded, swallowing, trying to clear the lump from her throat that only kept getting bigger. “The League wanted to know if you could be trusted by the king. You had made errors in judgment, and they wanted to determine if you were susceptible to the plots of treason that whirled around the king.”

  “The king, my cousin,” Tom said woodenly.

  “Aye,” she whispered. The wind caught her cloak, tugged at her hair. But even the snowflakes melting on her face were not as cold as the paralyzing feeling squeezing her chest.

  “And all this time, you have simply been spying on me, using me to satisfy your assignment to the League.” He pulled his hands away.

  She wanted to grasp for them, as if Tom himself were slipping away from her. “That is not how it was! Well, it was at first, of course, but not when I came to know you. And is that not what courtship is about?” Her voice was beginning to sound desperate.

  He blinked. “Now you’re saying you were courting me?”

  “Ohh!” She covered her face momentarily with her hands. “Nay, but I was coming to know you, like a courtship. And I learned that you’re a good man, worthy of trust. I told the League so!”

  His dark eyes flashed. “And what did taking me to bed tell you about my character?”

  She gasped, feeling nauseated. “Nay! You cannot think I would use you in such a manner! You know that I never meant more to happen between us. I was trying to keep you from my sister because of what I had…done to your brother.”

  “So you bedded me to keep me from your sister. A bonus to your assignment,” he added with sarcasm.

  She didn’t want to cry, mustn’t cry, but the tears burned her eyes trying to escape. “Oh, Tom, you know that is not true. I am not saying any of this correctly. Six years ago, you saved me at the expense of your own peace of mind, and I have repaid you terribly.”

  “No wonder you’ve been so evasive,” he said, his eyes losing focus as if analyzing everything she’d done in these last weeks.

  “I have been so torn!” she pleaded. “For six years I have done my duty to the League. I did not know what choice to make, but I know now. I owe you the six years of suspicion that you’ve suffered on my behalf. That is the only thing that will make it right. I will tell the king and court that I was the one who killed your brother defending myself. They will know that you are innocent.”

  He looked at her, his eyes at last betraying surprise more than anger.

  “Diana!”

  Diana recognized her sister’s voice instantly. Oh, not now!

  “You are not traveling with me!”

  That was Archie, who sounded exasperated.

  Cicely came to the half wall of the lady’s garden, pulling on gloves. She looked brightly between Archie and Tom, then said to her brother, “Lord Bannaster and Diana offered me a gift to celebrate their upcoming wedding: they’re sending me to London and will provide everything I need to live on as I look for a husband. And I do not wish to wait, so Archie, I’m leaving with you.”

  Why did Cicely have to complicate everything? Diana wondered with exasperation.

  In the silence that followed, she saw that Archie didn’t know who to look at first, Cicely or herself. She herself wanted to shout “Wedding?” at her sister, but it would only make matters worse.

  Finally, Archie rounded on Diana. “You’re getting married to him? I thought it had not been decided.”

  “I—” What could she say? Tom had asked her, she hadn’t answered, and now he might withdraw his proposal all together.

  Tom simply crossed his arms and stared at the three Winslow siblings, as if waiting for the next act of a play.

  Archie ground his teeth and turned on Cicely. “I have not agreed to any of this!”

  “I do not need you to. I can rent my own house. Lord Bannaster?”

  Tom nodded. “We made a bargain. I will hold to it.”

  Hold on to the lies that Diana had begun so long ago? Why
would he want to go on keeping these secrets? She was going to tell the truth!

  Or was he just trying to get rid of Cicely? Diana was so confused.

  “And how do you propose to live?” Archie bellowed at Cicely. “You cannot rent a house with his money.” He jerked a thumb at Tom. “I will not have you looking like some man’s leman. You will stay with me.”

  Cicely arched her brows in obvious surprise. “Well…what a kind invitation, brother dear. Then I can use my newfound money for an even better wardrobe, to attract a handsome, wealthy nobleman.”

  “Do not forget the dowry,” Tom said.

  Diana was gaping now, staring at all of them like they were mad.

  “You already have a dowry,” Archie said angrily. “And it is substantial. I was furious at how generous Father was.”

  Cicely grinned. “Good. Then we will travel together.”

  “And you,” Archie said, rounding on Diana. “You will not marry him!”

  That was one order too many, and Diana felt her hard-won control give way. “That is enough!” she cried, finding her hand reaching for her dagger as if she meant to draw it.

  On her brother? Was this what she wanted for her life? Always fighting Archie, always losing control of her temper? In many ways, she was too like him.

  She had spent her life trying to be different from other women, going after what she wanted using the fighting instincts of a man. It was now time to go after what she wanted, but using the ways of a woman.

  She lowered her hand. “That is enough,” she repeated in a quieter voice.

  Tom still said nothing, simply folded his arms over his chest and watched her with narrowed eyes.

  “Archie, I am not going to fight you over this. I am in love with Tom Bannaster.” She didn’t look at Tom, was too afraid of what she might see in his eyes.

  Cicely gave a dramatic sigh of boredom.

  “It is my dearest desire to marry him, but I no longer know if he wishes to marry me. I’ve spent my life feeling like an outsider within my own family, within my very womanhood. But he has made me realize that I have a home where I belong, and it is at his side, wherever that may be. He is nothing like his reputation. He is a man who would have done anything for his family, who was true to them even when they betrayed him. But I have done unforgivable things, and I need to tell—”

  “This doesn’t concern him,” Tom suddenly spoke in a firm voice. “If your brother has a problem with me or my reputation, we can meet at King Henry’s court to discuss it.”

  For the first time, Diana felt a flicker of hope. She gazed at Tom, no longer caring who saw her longing.

  Archie frowned at him, then glanced at Diana. “You do whatever you want. You will anyway.” Muttering, he added, “I…give you my permission. And I’ll be too busy to worry about you. My wife is expecting a child.”

  “When were you going to tell us this?” Cicely asked with exasperation.

  He shrugged and stalked away.

  Following their brother, Cicely looked over her shoulder and met Diana’s gaze, giving a single nod. Surprised, Diana nodded back. Then, squaring her shoulders, Diana turned back to Tom. Bare branches creaked against each other in the wind, and the daylight was draining away into the gray of twilight, mixed with the swirling snow. It looked as bleak as her soul felt at the thought of a life without Tom.

  “You should have let me tell him about what I did to your brother,” Diana said. “Delaying it will only—”

  “You are a fool,” Tom interrupted, suddenly gripping her arms. “Six years ago, I knew that if it were discovered that you had killed Nicholas, you would suffer greatly, perhaps even be put to death. Do you think anything you’ve said today would make me change my mind? You can’t believe I want to punish you for what has happened between us. You have suffered enough for what was not your fault.”

  Tears slipped from beneath her lashes as she briefly closed her eyes. “Oh, Tom, just tell me what you want, how I can prove my love to you.”

  “You have proven it,” he said softly.

  When he gathered her into his arms, his armored chest proof that he’d even go to war for her, it was all she could do to keep from breaking down and crying.

  “I know you spent your girlhood with the dream of accomplishing more with your life,” he said quietly. “I know what it’s like to want something so badly you feel that you’ll do anything to have it. Things outside of my control gave me my freedom, but you—you made your dreams come true. How can you think I would not admire what you did, training yourself, coming to the League’s notice and then grasping the chance to belong?”

  “But…I betrayed you.” The words seared her throat.

  “I was angry at first, and in that anger I said things I regret. You may have started out using me. And I began our relationship by deciding that I would discover your secrets and find the perfect punishment for you because of my imprisonment. But from the beginning, I felt torn, because there was always something about you that attracted me, and I spent far too long trying to pretend it was simply lust.”

  “Oh, I felt the same!” she cried, cupping his face in her trembling hands.

  “And then I fell in love with you,” he continued, a smile slowly transforming his face, “and I forgot that we were enemies, and wondered if we could have a future together.”

  “I thought so, too, Tom. I did not know how I could satisfy the League—and I needed to do that. They are important to me, and I cannot give them up.”

  “I know, and I would not ask you to change what you are.”

  She dropped her head to his chest for a moment in relief. “But Tom,” she said at last, “I told myself that I could make things right, that my report to the League would tell the truth about you, what a good man you are and how you’ve learned from your mistakes. But how could I tell you? I felt it was disloyal to the League to reveal their assignment, and disloyal to you to withhold it. How could I marry you with a secret like that? A husband and wife are supposed to share everything. That is why I went riding today. I had to make up my mind. You had not asked me to choose between you and the League, but I was worried that I was. Then I met the Bladesmen. One of them was kind enough to talk to me about the festering of secrets in a marriage. I realized then that the League would not expect perfection of me. And what I share with the man I love is none of their business. Then I returned, only to find you battling my brother for me—”

  He leaned down to give her a gentle kiss, and she inhaled the welcome scent of him in the cold air. It was like coming home.

  “I love you, Diana,” he murmured against her lips. “You’ve said those words before your brother and sister, but not yet to me.”

  “I love you, Tom,” she breathed, kissing him gently, reverently. “I want to be your wife and bear your children.”

  “And be a Bladeswoman?” He smiled down at her.

  “Only once a year,” she said quickly. “And when our children are born, I will excuse myself from assignments while they are young.”

  “And I, too, will have to do dangerous things to support you and my people, to defend our way of life. We will both have to suffer as we worry about each other.”

  “But we’ll always have each other to come home to.” Her happiness could not be contained, and she threw her arms around his neck. He picked her up off the ground and hugged her so tightly that her ribs creaked. She’d never felt at home with her family, had been banished by her brother, but she’d made her own home here at Kirkby Keep. With Tom, she would gladly make a new home again.

  “Let us marry soon,” Tom said. “The priest can be convinced to hurry the banns.”

  She leaned back to stare into his face. “But your own home, your people—”

  “I want you to spend this time with your people, the ones who’ve become your family. And do you not wish your brother and sister to share our happiness?” He grinned.

  “Cicely is already happy, but Archie…”

  �
�He’s already given his blessing. And he’s not going to be able to travel in this snow. Kirkby Keep will hold a special place in our hearts, the place where we found each other again, the place we fell in love. We’ll visit whenever you’d like. It will be a welcome change after Castle Bannaster. My home is…slightly larger.” He grinned.

  “And how will your people react to me? They will not know that I’m a Bladeswoman, but I will have to continue to train.”

  “You’ll be the viscountess. You can do as you please.”

  “People will have even more reason to talk.”

  “Let them. We’re used to that. We will have each other. And love. And children.”

  She leaned her head against his chest. “Aye, I want nothing more than a life with you.”

  He kissed her temple and whispered into her ear, “We’ve already begun.”

  About the Author

  JULIA LATHAM has an abiding love for the Middle Ages, when knights were knights and ladies had to tame them. After several varied jobs, the last in computer programming, she realized her life’s dream of being published with Avon Books. She lives in Central New York with her three children; her dog, Apollo; and her husband, Jim. Visit her website at www.JuliaLatham.com

  Julia also writes USA Today bestselling novels under the name Gayle Callen.

  Visit www.AuthorTracker.com for exclusive information on your favorite HarperCollins author.

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