These Sorrows We See

by Schultz, Tamsen

  Vivi looked about to press her more, but Ian entered the kitchen, followed by the two other officers. All of them were carrying either a box or several large envelopes.

  “We’re done here,” Ian announced. Vivi rose from her seat and asked Ian to take a DNA sample from Matty. Ian didn’t hesitate to do as his fiancée asked, and within two minutes, he was done. Matty stood as Ian capped and sealed the sample he’d taken from her mouth.

  “Thank you, Matty.” Ian said. “Marcus and Carly will take these items to the lab with Vivienne and we’ll let you know what we find out as soon as we know anything. In the meantime, take care of yourself—and be careful,” he added with a look at Dash.

  “Thank you,” she responded and they all moved toward the door.

  Matty leaned into Dash as they stood on the patio watching the four leave.

  “How are you doing?” he asked, rubbing his hand up and down her arm. The afternoon had gone by and dusk was beginning to fall. The crickets were singing in the fields and a few birds of prey were circling in the sky.

  “I’m not really sure,” she answered. “I mean, it was horrible to find what I did today and it’s horrible to think a man’s body may have been up there this whole time—time that Ian and Vivi could have been doing their jobs if we’d just found him sooner.”

  “But what about the fact that it might be Brad,” he pressed, ushering her inside.

  “That’s the part I’m feeling a little, well, nothing about. If it’s him I will be sad, but I’m not sure I will be any sadder than if it is anyone else. I know I should feel more because he’s my half brother, but, well . . .” Her voice trailed off and she let out a deep breath. “Then again, considering what I told you yesterday, maybe this is just another one of those instances where I should be feeling something but don’t because I’m lame and can’t.”

  Dash’s gut clenched. He knew what she was or wasn’t feeling for Brad had nothing to do with her childhood, but on the heels of their recent and raw conversation about the subject, he could understand how she might take her ambivalence as further proof of her lack of ability to feel.

  “There’s no should about any of this,” he reassured her. “You feel the way you feel, even if that feeling isn’t overwhelming sadness for a man who was little more than your biological half sibling.”

  She offered him another small smile. “I know, but it feels coldhearted not to be potentially devastated by it. I can’t even say I’m sad about lost opportunities because I’m not sure that those opportunities would have ever come up, even if he was alive. Listen to me,” she stopped speaking as she poured herself a glass of water. “I’m talking about Brad like we already know it was him up there in that barn. There is always a chance it wasn’t him, right?”

  Dash was pretty sure she didn’t think that was the case so he said nothing. He watched her take a few sips of water before she raised her eyes back to his.

  “I know,” she said. “I do think it is him. But it will be good to have Vivi confirm it whenever she can. And I know it could have something to do with the note he left me and maybe even what happened to Bob.” Her eyes darted away from his for a just a moment and he wondered if she was avoiding his gaze because of emotion or something else. The thought brought him up short, reminding him of the one argument they’d had. It seemed like ages ago but had really just been a few days past. She’d been looking into something that had to do with Brad and hadn’t wanted to tell him what. The situation had sparked what had become a much deeper conversation, but while wading through those depths with her, he’d forgotten what had originally piqued his interest.

  He opened his mouth to ask her about what she had been looking for on Brad’s computer, but she cut him off.

  “There are more questions than answers right now, Dash. But do you mind if we just not try to answer them, or think about them, too much tonight?”

  Given what she had gone through, it wasn’t a request he could deny. So he nodded and held out his hand to her. She came to him and he pulled her close.

  “Let’s go for a drive. We’ll stop at my house, eventually pick up some food and maybe a movie, and then come back here. Sound good?” he offered.

  She made a little hum against his chest. “That sounds like just what the doctor ordered.”

  CHAPTER 15

  MATTY KNEW DASH SUSPECTED that she wasn’t telling him everything about Brad. She could tell by the hint of a question that crept into his eyes whenever she brushed off talking about her half brother. When Dash had first raised the subject in his truck that night as they drove to dinner with his parents, she had brushed him off because of habit, because of her underlying fears about where she stood, or could stand, in their relationship. But now it was something different. Now, though she wasn’t overwhelmed by sadness, she did feel a bit of a protective streak for her half brother creeping into her psyche and she wanted to know more about the body before she said anything about what she suspected Brad might have gotten tangled up in.

  First and foremost, she wanted to know if, in fact, the body was really Brad’s. And if so, how he’d died. It shouldn’t matter, but it did. Had whoever the man was that she’d found in the barn committed suicide or had he been killed?

  If he’d been killed, then the hints that Brad had been involved in some sort of financial misdeeds would be important. But if he’d killed himself? What would anyone have to gain by knowing of his potential transgressions?

  The banks might be able to close the books, but they’d do that anyway once they found out Brad was dead. As it was, the only thing she could see coming out of disclosing such information, if in fact it was Brad and he had committed suicide, was the additional emotional devastation Brad’s parents would feel. And again, while she didn’t feel any affection for either of them, no parent should have to go through what may lay ahead of them.

  So, instead of talking about what she had or hadn’t found in her search of Brad’s computer and house, Matty and Dash spent the evening curled up on the couch watching old movies. Without her asking him to, Dash took the next day off and they spent it together, quietly running errands about town. They dropped off several cartons of eggs at Dash’s parents’ house and were invited to stay for lunch. In the afternoon, they went down to Main Street, where Matty did a little shopping in the quilt store, Spin-A-Yarn, picking out a beautiful quilt of fall colors for her mom. After that, they wandered around in the wine shop and then she bought a new pair of fall boots at the only shoe store in town. They avoided Frank’s because they figured that, by now, many people in town would know about the body and they worried that if they sat down it might look like an invitation for people to come and talk. And neither she nor Dash were interested in talking about what she had found.

  She paused outside a closed ice cream store and Dash told her that the young woman who owned it had been attacked several months earlier. She was doing well and a full recovery was expected, but she hadn’t been able to reopen her shop yet. The town, it seemed, had pitched in and paid her rent and utilities for six months so she wouldn’t lose her business while she healed. Matty thought that sentiment probably wasn’t particular to small towns, but she liked the idea of the community coming together to help one of their own. She made a mental note to make a donation herself.

  After picking up her car from the clinic, they made their way back to Brad’s farm. Evening was settling over the valley and Matty and Dash were out on the patio sipping wine when they saw headlights turn onto the driveway. Predictably, the dogs were up and barking within seconds, but recognizing the vehicle as Ian’s, she and Dash stayed seated until the engine cut out.

  Ian was out of uniform and Matty could tell by the look on his face that the news wasn’t good. Dash moved to her side as, hand in hand, Ian and Vivi approached them.

  “Do his parents know?” Matty asked quietly.

  Vivi nodded.

  “They’re out on Prince Edward Island in Canada right now. They’ll arrive in W
indsor tomorrow,” Ian said.

  “And was it suicide?” Matty actually brought herself to ask.

  Vivi leaned against the patio railing and lifted a shoulder. “We’re still going over the evidence. I’m the ME on the case, but I work with Sam Buckley who runs the lab. Neither of us are prepared to make a call on cause of death yet.”

  Matty gave that statement a moment of thought. It was strange to think a man could die and that the cause of his death would not be easily known. Oh, she knew it happened on television and in movies, but real life wasn’t usually as gruesome, or at least as consistently gruesome, as fiction. In real life, people died in ways that weren’t a mystery.

  “When? Do you know when it happened?” Matty asked, not really knowing if she wanted to know the answer, if she wanted to know just how long her half brother’s body had been left out and exposed.

  “Twelve days ago,” Vivi answered, her voice quiet. “The same day the man who fell into your truck died,” she added.

  Matty frowned. “The same day I arrived,” she said. “Do you think they are related? Do you know who he is yet?”

  Vivi lifted a shoulder. “At this point, we still don’t have an ID. But as to whether or not the two incidents are related, we don’t have any evidence indicating that they are, but the investigation into Brad’s death is still in its early stages. Honestly, I’d be surprised to find out they weren’t. Though, how they might be related, we’ll have to figure out.”

  Dash and the others gave Matty the space and time to let the information sink in. For a moment, she stood in the silence. Then she gave a small shrug and a shake of her head. “I guess, well, I’m not really sure what to think. I suppose over the next few days we’ll have to sort out what to do with Brad’s animals and all that, and I’m really not exactly sure what, if anything, I should be doing, but . . .” Her voice trailed off.

  “When my grandmother died,” Matty started speaking again, “we all knew it was going to happen, and by that point, I’d been living with her for over fifteen years. We knew who her friends were, who we needed to tell. She was very clear about what kind of service she wanted and all that. But with Brad, I have no idea and I’m not even sure I’m the one who should have anything to do with it.”

  Dash reached over and took her hand in his.

  Ian wrapped an arm around Vivi who leaned into her fiancé. “You don’t have to do anything tonight,” Ian said. “Vivienne is still doing her thing and I would imagine, knowing what little I know of Brad from what we took into evidence, that somewhere in the house he left a will, or some kind of document, that will explain what his wishes were.”

  Matty frowned and dropped her gaze. She’d been through a lot of Brad’s files and paperwork and hadn’t seen a will, but she hadn’t really been looking for one either. “I guess I can see what I can find. He has files in his office, but he also has a room full of documents and other things down in the basement.”

  “Why don’t you start that tomorrow,” Dash suggested. “There’s nothing to be done about it tonight,” he added, looking out for her more than anything. She looked up from her wineglass and met Dash’s gaze. For a moment, her breath caught at the emotion, at the caring she saw in his eyes. With a small smile, she squeezed his hand.

  “I think that’s a good idea. Vivi, Ian,” she said, turning back to the pair. “Dash’s mom sent us home with a huge lasagna this afternoon, and I have some greens from the garden. Would you like to join us for dinner?”

  Vivi and Ian accepted her invitation and the four of them spent the evening like old friends, eating, talking, drinking, and even laughing. That she’d only known them all less than two weeks did not escape Matty’s notice, but for the first time she could remember, she let herself go with it. In her life, real friends were forged over years of loyalty and consistency. But on this night, in this quiet place, she let herself believe that time need not always be the arbiter of what is good or real.

  ***

  By ten o’clock the next morning it was clear that news had gotten out about Brad’s death. Elise, his neighbor, had stopped by and Chen had called, as had a few of Brad’s other friends. Matty had called her mother and Charlotte to let them both know what had happened. To say that they weren’t happy with her staying in Windsor was a huge understatement.

  While Charlotte was concerned about the possibility of Brad having been murdered not half a mile from where Matty was staying, her mother was more concerned about the arrival of Sandra and Douglas Brooks. Matty assured both of them that she would be fine and that, while she was living in the house, mostly because of the animals, she wasn’t alone. And as for her father and his wife, well, Matty knew she could handle herself with them. She actually hadn’t given their arrival much thought—not real thought—until her mother brought it up.

  “Everything okay?” Dash asked when she’d hung up the phone with her mom. He’d taken another day off from his clinic but was still on call for emergencies.

  Matty frowned. “My mom is worried about what might happen when Brad’s parents show up.”

  Dash came to her side and propped his hip against the kitchen counter next to where she sat. “Do you think it will be a problem?”

  She mulled it over before answering. “I’m not really sure. I know I can treat them civilly, for sure. But this situation is going to be so much more emotionally charged than the last time I saw them. I mean, my god, they just lost a son. Their only child. I really can’t imagine what they must be going through, what they must be feeling right now. And then to find me here, well,” she paused. “Well, I’m an easy scapegoat given who I am and what happened after my grandmother died, with me inheriting most of the estate and all.”

  “Do you want to leave?” he asked. “You can always stay with me,” he added.

  Again, she thought before answering. “I don’t think I should leave quite yet. There are the animals that Brad entrusted to me and then, depending on what Vivi finds, the police may need to be here again. I just think that someone should be here to handle things for Brad and I’m not sure his parents would be able, or should even be asked, to do that.”

  Dash reached over and brushed a lock of her hair back from her face. “That’s very fair of you.”

  She gave a small laugh. “I know.” The irony that she was the one who would have to maintain the peace after everything her father had, or had not, done was not lost her. “But again, taking me out of the picture, Sandra and Douglas are two people who just lost their son. They’ll need someone to handle the details.”

  Dash opened his mouth to say something but his ringing phone cut him off. Pulling it from his pocket, he glanced at the number, frowned and hit the answer button.

  “Kristen? Is everything okay?”

  Matty watched his expression as he listened.

  “Whoa, slow down. How long?” he asked. “Left hind?” He waited for an answer. “It’s okay, Kristen, I’m glad you called. I’ll be right over. Just try to keep him calm until I get there, okay?”

  Dash must have received the reassurance he was looking for because he hung up and looked at her with a far-off expression, like he was trying to figure something out.

  “Everything okay?” she asked, repeating the same question he’d asked the caller.

  He gave a shake of his head and held out a hand. “I need to make a vet call, will you come?” he asked. She nodded and he filled her in as they locked up the house and climbed into his truck. “That was Kristen, my neighbor to the east. She’s a kid, fourteen. Her dad leaves her alone a lot so she has my number in case of emergencies. About a year ago, her dad bought her a horse as a guilt gift and now the horse, Bogey, is tangled up in the fence.”

  “That sounds bad.”

  “It can be, depending on how much they thrash around,” he answered.

  “But something else is bothering you?” Matty pressed. Dash had looked like he was pondering more than just a common problem when he’d hung up the phone.


  After a moment, he spoke. “Yeah, it’s weird that he’s only tangled up on his left hind leg. It’s possible he rolled near the fence and rolled into it with that leg, but usually when I see a horse tangled in a fence, it’s a front leg or both back legs. It may be nothing, but I’ll know more when we get there.”

  Ten minutes later, they were walking down a hill toward a distraught young girl who was alternately trying to soothe a clearly frightened horse and wave them toward her. As they approached, Dash introduced Matty to Kristen, a waify-looking girl with the biggest, deepest pair of blue eyes Matty had ever seen, offset by Mediterranean coloring and dark blonde hair. Kristen very politely murmured her greeting but promptly turned her attention to Dash who was running his hand down the side of the enormous brown animal as he made his way to the entangled leg.

  Matty watched Dash as he made a quick visual examination of the mess, then turned her own eyes to the situation. And cringed. It wasn’t just a single wire from a fence wrapped around the poor horse’s leg; it was five or six. Even to her, it looked strange, like five or six strands of wire had come unwound from each other and had all wrapped separately around the horse’s back leg in various places.

  Matty’s eyes went to the fence. It was made of heavy gauge wire and constructed much like a rope, which would explain all the different strands. It sure as hell didn’t look like it would come apart easily. In fact it seemed like the kind of wire that would require either years of wear and tear to come apart, or opposable thumbs.

  “Dash?” she said, calling his attention to her. His eyes looked up, even as his hand stayed on the shaking horse. She made a small gesture to the fence with her eyes, not sure if the situation was as weird as she thought it was and not wanting to call Kristen’s attention to it if she was wrong.