Heal Me (Magnolia Series Book 2)

by Alexandra Page

  Nik shrugs, still grinning at me and not the least bit repentant. “Sorry, couldn’t help myself.”

  “Don’t blame you a bit,” he chuckles with a wink. “Shall we get to it?”

  We both nod and smile enthusiastically.

  He looks out over our friends and family with a welcoming smile and asks them to sit. As soon as they’re settled he begins.

  “Nik and Ellie and I would like to welcome you all here. They have chosen you, those most special and important to them, to witness and celebrate the beginning of their new life together this evening. These two bring new meaning to the phrase, ‘God works in mysterious ways.’ Their story is not for the faint of heart and while they were brought into each other’s lives by tragedy, and both have told me that they wouldn’t be standing here were it not for the other, in this they only see God and his miracles.” His pleasant smile fades a bit and he tilts his head, his eyebrows raised. “I tend to agree with them.”

  Brandon mumbles an ‘amen’ beside me. I hear a few more behind us.

  The preacher nods and continues. “As all of you have already bared witness to, because of their individual strengths, gentle souls and loving hearts, they have come through the fire stronger. Tempered, not broken into shattered pieces, but joined as one, unbreakable. And this evening they will strengthen their bond even more.”

  He looks back to us. “Nik and Ellie, do you, with God and your friends and family as your witnesses, present yourselves willingly and of your own accord to be joined in marriage?”

  “We do,” we answer together.

  “Then let’s begin. Please face each other and join hands.”

  I hand my flowers to Brandon. He winks at me as he takes them, then I turn to face my future husband. His eyes are filled with so much happiness and love it makes me lightheaded in the best way. I slip my hands into his, the ones I love so much, giving them a squeeze. He rubs his thumbs over the backs of mine and that familiar sense of comfort comes over me, which is why I insisted we start our wedding this way. I never feel safer than when his hands hold me. I know without a doubt he’ll always be there for me in whatever way I might need him.

  “Nik and Ellie, these are the hands of your best friend. Young and strong and full of love, these hands will work alongside yours as together you build your future. These hands will passionately love and cherish you through the years. They will hold you when fear and grief torment your mind and with the slightest touch, comfort you like no other. These are the hands that will give you strength when you need it and support and encouragement to chase down your dreams. They will be the hands that tenderly hold your children and help hold your family together as one. They will continue to wipe tears from your eyes – tears of sorrow, and tears of joy. These will be the hands that you hold as you pray for guidance and in gratitude. And these will be the hands, even when wrinkled with age, that will still be reaching for yours, still giving you unconditional love with just a simple touch. Hold tight to each other’s hands and always remember your love is only a touch away.”

  Nik pulls my hands up to his mouth and kisses my knuckles. I follow suit and do the same to his.

  “Ellie, I believe you wrote your own vows?” the preacher asks, keeping us on track.

  “Yes, sir, I did.”

  He nods with an encouraging grin so I let go of Nik long enough to take out my vows from the hidden pocket in my dress then reach for him again.

  I tried my best to memorize them so I could look at him while I spoke, but I don’t know if I can get through it without falling apart now. Not with him looking at me like he is, with his heart pouring out of his eyes. I’m going to try though.

  I take a deep breath and look into my favorite pools of blue. “My sweet, Nik. My love, my heart, my miracle. You saved my life the day we met and since then you have saved me so many times in so many ways I’ve lost count. Sometimes it’s with your smile, or when you wrap your arms around me, or even something as simple as you brushing my hair behind my ear. Other times it’s your laugh, your gorgeous face so peaceful as you sleep next to me, or your quiet presence always there when I need it. And I can’t forget your never-ending patience and gentleness. I love all those things about you, and countless others, so very much, they save me on a daily basis, but none of those…none of those would be possible…without your big, beautiful heart,” I whisper through my tears.

  He reaches up and wipes some of them away with his thumb while I try to get ahold of myself. His sweet smile is all the support I need.

  “I love that most of all. It’s selfless, kind, and caring, compassionate, generous, and filled with so much love. Because of it you have kissed my flaws until they’re no more, taken away my fears and made me brave, and though I was broken, you, your heart, and your love have healed me and made me whole again. I’m not sure a lifetime is long enough to give back all you have given me, but I vow to never stop trying, to never stop loving you with all I am for the rest of our days.”

  We lose it then, both of us blubbering messes, just like Leia said. But we’re very happy ones. Nik takes out his handkerchief this time and wipes my eyes, careful not to mess up my makeup, then I take it from him and clean his face up. There’s lots of sniffles coming from our guests too.

  Once we’re composed the preacher moves us along. “Nik, whenever you’re ready.”

  Keeping a firm grip on my hands, he clears his throat then takes a deep breath and lets it out. “Bird, I can’t believe I’m standing here marrying you, the most amazing person I know. I feel like I’m in a dream. I’ve yet to figure out what I did to deserve the gift of having you in my life, let alone being blessed with your love. But there’s one thing I do know: I’m yours. I have been from the moment I laid eyes on you and I always will be. Some would probably consider the day we met my worst day, but I don’t. It brought you into my life and you’re by far the best thing that’s ever happened to me. When I saved your life that day, I had no idea mine would be saved too. You’ve taught me what it truly means to be strong and brave, and that love is the most important of all. You’re my inspiration, my hero, the joy in my heart, the peace in my soul, and the smile on my face. My every minute is brighter because you’re with me. I’m so ready to spend the rest of my life by your side. I can’t promise everything will always be perfect, but I do promise you that no matter what comes our way, good or bad, I’ll never leave you and you’ll always have my whole heart. Always.”

  He didn’t even get halfway through before we were both in tears again, but at least they’re happy ones. I want so badly to wrap my arms around him and never let go. I shouldn’t want to rush through all of this, but I can’t wait to have him to myself.

  “Some of the loveliest vows I’ve ever heard. Now I need a promise from you both,” the preacher asks. He waits for us to agree and we both nod, wanting him to hurry. He bites back a grin and winks at me before becoming serious again. “Ellie, do you offer your solemn vow to be faithful to Nik in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, and in joy as well as in sorrow. Promise to love him unconditionally, to support him in his goals, to honor and respect him, to laugh with him and cry with him, and to cherish him for as long as you both shall live?”

  “I do,” I promise, never taking my eyes from Nik’s.

  “Nik, do you offer your solemn vow to be faithful to Ellie in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, and in joy as well as in sorrow. Promise to love her unconditionally, to support her in her goals, to honor and respect her, to laugh with her and cry with her, and to cherish her for as long as you both shall live?”

  Nik smiles at me. “I do.”

  “Having this love in your hearts, you have chosen to seal your vows by exchanging rings.”

  That’s our cue. We let go of each other, Nik digging in his pocket for my ring and me taking his from Brandon while the preacher continues. “From the earliest times, the circle has been a sign of completeness. The rings that you have chosen to wear have n
either beginning, nor end, much like your love for one another. They are a symbol of the words that you speak today. May these rings be from this day forward, your most treasured adornment, and may the love they symbolize, be your most precious possession. As you wear these rings, may they be constant reminders of these glad promises you are making today. Ellie, please place the ring on Nik’s finger as you repeat the verse.”

  My hand shaking, I take Nik’s and slowly slip the silver band onto his ring finger. “Nik, my hand is yours to hold and with this ring I give you my heart, forever yours to keep. From this moment forward you will never again walk alone, by your side I’ll always be, my arms your home.”

  I keep thinking his smile can’t get any happier, but I’m wrong. He doesn’t even wait for the preacher to prompt him before taking my hand and slipping my band on.

  “Ellie, my hand is yours to hold and with this ring I give you my heart, forever yours to keep. From this moment forward you will never again walk alone, by your side I’ll always be, my arms your home.”

  Everything goes quiet, only the breeze moving through the trees and the lapping water out in the marshes fill the silence. We stand and stare at one another, our faces nearly splitting open with our smiles.

  Only a few more words…

  “Nik and Ellie, having pledged your fidelity and to love, honor, and cherish one another in the presence of this gathering and by the authority vested in me by the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, it is my honor to now pronounce you husband and wife. Nik, you may kiss your bride. Again.”

  Cheers and laughter erupt around us as Nik lifts me up, wrapping me in his arms, and kisses me like no one’s watching. I kiss him right back.

  “I present Mr. and Mrs. Nikolas Jensen!”

  Epilogue

  Nik

  An ear-splitting cry wakes me from the coma I was in, every muscle and nerve I have jerking violently, my heart racing.

  Ellie whines beside me, flinging the covers back to get up.

  I reach out and grab her before she goes too far. “I got him. Go back to sleep, babe.” She’s already been up twice tonight that I was conscious enough to notice.

  She burrows back under the covers and from somewhere beneath her pillow, I hear her muffled, “Thank you, now hurry, before he wakes up, Bella.”

  I force myself to my feet, rubbing my face in hopes it will clear some of the exhaustion away. I don’t know why I bother, we’ve been walking around like zombies for months now. Between him and his big sister, sleep isn’t something we get much of. One of the many joys of parenthood.

  When I make it to his crib and see the fat tears rolling down his chubby cheeks, his little chin quivering, the exhaustion doesn’t much matter anymore.

  “Hey, buddy boy. Shhhh, daddy’s gotcha,” I coo at him, scooping him up.

  He rubs his little face in my neck, his pitiful cries calming a fraction. I make the usual three laps around the room, rubbing his back and bouncing as I go, before I risk changing him. We learned quick he’ll kick his screams into the blood curdling range if you don’t calm him down first.

  As soon as I deem it safe I lay him on the changing table. Thank God, El just put a t-shirt on him. My giant fingers do not do well with tiny snaps and buttons.

  “Which is it this time, bud?” I ask him, while pulling his diaper off, keeping my voice soft, but happy. I’m sure my face looks ridiculous, eyes wide, smile just past over exaggerated. But who cares? He’s not screaming anymore.

  I take a quick peek to assess the damage. Thank you, Lord. No shits for daddy to clean up.

  Holding him with one hand, I grab a burp cloth with the other, then make the switcheroo: wet diaper in the trash, burp cloth covering up his water pistol. It only took one squirt in the face for me to learn that trick. The boy’s got range, and excellent aim.

  He’s a happy squirming bundle of arms and legs now that he’s free of his sopping diaper. “This would go much faster if you’d be still, you know? How many times do we gotta do this before you figure that out?” I ask, getting him in his clean diaper.

  Raspberries and gurgles is the only response I get.

  “It’s a good thing you’re cute.” I pick him up, giving his neck rolls a good kiss, then grab a blanket and his pacifier and head to the kitchen for a fresh bottle. I’m almost there when something grabs my pants, giving them a tug. “Shit!” I half whisper, half yell, turning to see what’s got ahold of me.

  Of course, it’s my daughter, looking too adorable by far to be mad at in her tiny Wonder Woman night gown, blonde curls a messy halo, her big eyes swollen and sleepy, clutching her blankie. “Bella, babe, what are you doing up? It’s still night-nite time.”

  Naturally she ignores that detail completely. “You says an uggie word, daddy.”

  “Yes, I know. You scared me. I’m sorry.” I adjust Jon Nik so I’m holding him with one arm, then take her outstretched little hand in my other and walk us to the living room. His little engine revs up the second we turn right instead of left towards the kitchen and his bottle. No amount of bouncing or back rubbing will make up for the delay either.

  “I wanna seep wif mama,” Bella pouts, but climbs on anyway, as I help her up on the sofa. She snuggles with her blanket, looking up at me with her mama’s face. She’s an exact copy of Ellie, personality and all. My perfect little angel.

  I put my son on mute for hopefully the next five minutes, popping his passie in his mouth. Still bouncing and now patting his back. “Mama’s been up all night with Jon Nik. Let me get him a bottle and we’ll lay down with you, okay?” I try to appease my first born.

  “Otay.” She yawns so big I’m surprised her little jaw doesn’t crack. “Can I has some juice too, daddy?”

  “Yeah, wait right there, punk.”

  “I not a punk, daddy. I’m a punkin.”

  “Begging your pardon, princess punkin.”

  I can’t help but smile hearing her giggles as I walk to the kitchen. Jon continues his impersonation of an engine with a dead battery until I get his bottle heated. Poor kiddo was the best baby till his teeth started coming in. It’s been hell for weeks now. He attacks his bottle as soon as I stick it in his mouth, his little gums biting down so hard on the nipple it’s a wonder he doesn’t bite it off. I hate not being able to make him feel better.

  Before we join Bella on the sofa I make sure to close all the curtains across the porch doors and windows. There’s nothing that wakes a kid up faster than daylight.

  “Bella, sit up babe so daddy can sit down, then you can lay in my lap, okay?”

  She grumbles a little, but soon we’re all three settled down for what I hope is a few more hours sleep. Thank goodness for Saturdays.

  Bella’s little hand grabs a fist full of my shirt, giving it three good tugs. “Pay wif my hair, daddy.”

  I smile, because how can I not. Her tiny voice is adorable, just like everything else about her, including her quirk of needing her hair played with to fall asleep. Reaching down I run my fingers through her curls, careful not to catch too many tangles.

  Jon’s chowing down, already halfway through his bottle and that close to sleep too. His little eyelids keep drooping closed, staying that way a bit longer each time while he does that precious sighing and panting thing all babies do when they eat. I can’t help but kiss his downy, almost white hair and breathe in his baby smell.

  As exhausted as I am, snuggling with my babies is pretty close to perfection. Having El here with us is the only thing that would make it better.

  Needing to stay awake till Jon’s done – if I don’t burp him he’ll puke all over us, then nobody will get any sleep – my eyes scan the room looking for distractions. Ellie’s picture wall works well. The room’s mostly dark, but the light over the stove is giving off a warm glow so I can still make out most of our faces smiling out of the frames across the room. I can see each picture in my mind anyway. I’ve looked at most of them every day for the last five years now.

  The first
one to grace the wall was our wedding portrait. It’s still there, front and center. She was so beautiful that day. Next to having our mini mes, it was the best day of our lives. My eyes trail to the two pictures on the right, then the two on the left, all from our honeymoon. The first is me and her with the Italian Alps behind us, then one of us in our bathing suits lounging on a beach in the Mediterranean. The third, a selfie we took in the beautiful streets of Stockholm, and the last, a family picture with Leia in front of her extravagant Christmas tree.

  Ellie insisted we end our honeymoon in London to spend the holidays with her. She wanted the whole shebang – big dinner, tree and presents on Christmas morning. It had been so long since she had a family to have Christmas with, we couldn’t tell her no. She was right, of course, it was wonderful to sit around a table filled with enough food for an army, watching Christmas movies till we all dozed off, then waking up to open presents just like we did when we were kids.

  As soon as Jon Nik is big enough to handle the flight I’m taking all of us back. Ellie was in heaven the whole time, like a little kid getting a new toy everywhere we went. And even though we stayed for a whole month, we still didn’t see everything we wanted to.

  We can skip Christmas in London though. Leia’s home now. She moved back just before Bella was born. She lives in the townhouse and works at SCAD too. I hardly see her there since she’s in the fashion department, but she seems happy, and loves being close to spoil her niece and nephew.

  Which she plans on doing tonight and part of tomorrow.

  It’s our sixth anniversary and I’ve had tonight planned for a while now. Ellie’s nervous. It’ll be Jon’s first night away from her, but she survived Bella’s, so I’m sure she’ll get through his. He is her weakness though. Bella is too, and me, but Jon still has a slight lead on us. He’s her baby, and though she’s never said it out loud, I know he reminds her of Lucas. Hell, he reminds me of him from just the pictures I’ve seen.

  Ellie marks her children well.