Pretty Toxic - A New Adult Romance (Imperfectly Yours)

by Gardner, A.

The man is halfway up the staircase. He examines each step like it’s a ticking explosive waiting to detonate. In less than a minute he will see me . . . maybe kill me.

  My blood pumps through my veins and heats up my entire body. The only thing that stands in my way of freedom is a locked glass door and the second floor deck I’d be jumping off of. I choke down a swallow seeing the man’s head coming into view. I pause and take in a second of silence.

  Go!

  I jump to my feet and sprint to the door. My legs are weighing me down like blocks of concrete . I can’t get there fast enough. I reach for the shiny glass. It's my ticket out.

  Don’t look back!

  I grip the handle and slide the glass door open. A gust of wind blows across my steaming face.

  A few more steps.

  I hear shouting behind me. I’m too focused on my objective to care. The noise gets louder. It sounds like a pair of symbols clanging together next to my eardrums. My hands cover my ears automatically. The noise vibrates down my body. It’s excruciating. Like being repeatedly stomped on at football practice.

  The air is cooler than expected. I see the wooden railing and visualize myself hurtling over it, landing on my feet like Paige’s disgusting cat named Jaz. I uncover my ears and the noise blasts through me. My heart is convulsing. I can’t breathe.

  I think of Dad’s weathered face. His iron stare.

  I’m doing this, no matter what it takes.

  I leap over the railing and look down at the lively grass that will soon break my fall. My stomach churns.

  I’m falling for eternity.

  The screams are getting louder. The pain grows stronger. I collapse in the dew-covered grass and force my body to stand. I drag my feet towards the woods. The endless city of pines welcomes me like a long lost friend. The noises are getting faint. I’m making good time and following the path I once traveled as a kid.

  I’m hobbling.

  They won’t wait long to come after me. I need to keep my lead while I can. That is if Rig hasn’t killed them both by now. Then the man hunt would just be me and him. I force myself to take deep breaths. I hear my footsteps rustling branches.

  I’m limping.

  I need to move faster but I can’t. My leg is slowing me down. I glance at it. My pant leg is soaking. Dark crimson is seeping through my jeans.

  I stop.

  My muscles are throbbing. I clutch the wound to stop the bleeding and a shooting sting bursts up my spine. I wince. I’ve been shot.

  Bastards.

  I’m not just winded from the long fall. I need to find a hospital, and I need to see Mikki.

  I’m dying.

  MIKKI

  Chapter Twenty Two

  “. . . too skank to ride shotgun.”

  This is a nightmare. When most girls tell the story of losing their virginity at least they remember it. My hair is tangly, and my top is twisted around my torso. I slept through the night without my jeans on. I’m too mortified to roll over. I can feel Kade breathing steadily next to me. He’s still asleep.

  My head starts to pound the moment I think too much. I carefully eye the mess on the floor.

  My jeans. There they are.

  My stomach tosses and turns. I can’t remember the details and I feel like a slut trying to quietly grab my clothes while Kade sleeps. I don’t think this is what someone’s first time is supposed to feel like. It’s nothing like I imagined it would be but Aunt Scarlett always says I watch too many "rom-coms". That is the word she uses for romantic comedies.

  I gather the courage to sit up and face the splintering headache that's bubbling in the back of my head. Kade rolls over. I feel his warm hand brush against my side and it gives me goose bumps. I slide out of his bed, one foot in front of the other. I attempt to cover myself as I grab my jeans and search for any other belongings I might have dropped.

  “Leaving?”

  I freeze at the sound of his voice, still trying to remember last night and what I said to him. Also what he said to me. All I remember is feeling . . . safe.

  “Uh . . . yeah,” I reply. The awkward pillow talk the morning after. Compared to Hollywood, this part does feel pretty accurate.

  “That’s a shame,” he responds. My insides are on the verge of exploding, yet his voice is strangely soothing.

  Why can’t I remember?!

  “Um . . .” I want to ask him what happened last night but I can’t bring myself to. That would make it true. It would make my mistake more real. While trekking to the mountains to save Dane, I slept with another guy.

  I’m a horrible person.

  “Mikki?” Kade studies my expression. “Is everything okay?”

  Of course it’s not okay.

  “Sure,” I lie through my teeth. His eyes dart to my bare legs. I gulp.

  “Sorry,” he exhales. He turns his back while I put my clothes on. I feel like I should say something. At least acknowledge that I wasn’t myself last night.

  “Listen I-” A loud knock on the door disturbs us. Zanna steps in. She’s dressed and holding our duffle bags.

  “Time to go,” she states. She eyes me suspiciously.

  “Can you give us a minute?” Kade asks. Zanna glares at me.

  “Nope.” She grabs my arm and pulls me all the way to the front door. The sunlight is blinding. The wind gusts through my hair as Zanna opens the trunk and throws our things in it. I rub my head and sit in the back seat. She’s mad at me. I know she is.

  I close my eyes and try to collect my thoughts. My eyelids are heavy. I hear the engine start and the slow rocking of the car on the highway lulls me into deep thought. Before I know it, I fall asleep.

  * * *

  I wake up to the sound of wind rushing against my ears. The windows are down and Zanna is blasting rock music from the driver’s seat. I can see jagged mountains on both sides of me when I look out the window. I sit up.

  “Why didn’t you wake me?” My question comes out as more of a shout. It’s hard to hear anything when you drive freeway speeds with the windows down. Zanna glances over her shoulder.

  “Because you’re too skank to ride shotgun.” She laughs and rolls up the windows, eliminating some of the throbbing pain in my forehead. So I wasn’t mistaken earlier. She knows everything.

  “Zanna . . .” My mouth hangs open but no words come out. I don’t know what to say to her. Kade is her cousin. Of all people her cousin.

  “I know what you're going to say,” she answers for me. “You feel horrible. You don’t know how else to say you're sorry and you’re going to make it up to me.”

  “So . . . you know what happened then?” I eye her anxiously. Maybe she can recount some details that are foreign to me. Help me add up the pieces. Anything to disprove what had actually happened between me and Kade last night.

  “Ew,” she shakes her head. “What goes on behind closed doors is your business. If you’d slept with some other dude I’d want to know all the sexual deats. But Kade is my cousin . . . eww.”

  “So I did sleep with him,” I mutter. Admitting it out loud makes my chest feel tight.

  “Look,” Zanna continues. “It was a mistake. Don’t beat yourself up over it.”

  “But Dane-”

  “But Dane has slept with how many girls? I think he will be fine with it.”

  She doesn’t know how untrue that actually is. Dane and I have discussed my first time and even planned it out together.

  “No he won’t be fine with it,” I respond. “You don’t understand.” My head is throbbing again and a tear is forming in my eye. It comes gushing out. Zanna glances at me again.

  “Well maybe we’ll just . . . not say anything. Like ever.”

  I climb to the front seat and buckle my seatbelt. My eye is drawn to the grandness of the canyons around me. The mountains look like they were built from the ground up with giant rocks. The sky is a deep blue and rays of sunshine beat down on the car’s hood.

  “What do I do?” I blurt out. My head
is spinning. Dane is going to hate me. He’ll never speak to me again.

  “First of all,” she smiles. “Try not to think too hard, girl. You have a massive hangover at the moment. And second, there’s no guarantee we’ll actually find Dane out here but wasn’t it fun to take off at random? I mean, you’ve never done anything like this. Ever. Ever. Ever.”

  “I’m surprised that Scar hasn’t called the cops on us.”

  “You never know.” Zanna shrugs. “It’s only been one night. Maybe she’s giving you some space?”

  “Or she thinks I’m down the street at your house,” I reply. “And that I’m going to walk in at any moment for breakfast.”

  “Won’t she be surprised.”

  Zanna’s face lights up. She signals her blinker and begins moving toward an exit.

  “We’re here,” she says in a low voice. “You got the address ready?” I grab a wrinkled piece of notebook paper from the center console.

  “I think I might puke,” I answer.

  “We came all this way.”

  “I know,” I gulp.

  “Relax.” Zanna puts a hand on my shoulder. “Think of it this way. You’re here to help a

  Do lovers count?

  If you can define lovers as two people who make out all the time but haven’t slept together yet. And this is all in secret.

  I don’t think I know anymore.

  Chapter Twenty Three

  “The skeleton man is chasing me.”

  “I can’t do this,” I shake my head. Zanna stops at the beginning of a long driveway that curves behind forest trees. A closed gate blocks strangers from wandering down the path, and a sign that says Bristlecone hangs along the fence. We are here and I still don't know what to do.

  “Just walk up to the front door,” Zanna suggests.

  “Brilliant idea.” I shake my head. “We have no clue what’s going on in there.”

  “Okay,” she rolls her eyes. “You think of something then. We did come all this way. There’s no way in hell I’m turning around.”

  I open the car door and inhale the cold mountain air. It does feel different than the air in Oregon. I glance down the winding driveway. My feet carry me to a low spot in the fence and I climb over. The shadow of a tree grabs my attention and I stay behind it surveying the lodge. It looks about three stories. It’s tall and made of dark wood with iron fences around the balconies. There is a black SUV in the driveway.

  I listen for a moment. Nothing but silence. Maybe Dane really was waiting for me inside? This is his family lodge. Why would a kidnapper take someone to their own vacation house? I reason with myself until I gather the courage to walk a little closer. Maybe I can go around the back and try to get Dane’s attention somehow.

  I take a deep breath and decide to make a run for it. I tread lightly on the path, hardly making a noise. I sneak past the car in the driveway and run around back. I see windows. Lots of open windows. I inch close to one and glimpse inside. I see movement and it startles me. I crouch to the ground.

  That could have been Dane. My heart starts beating quicker and I force myself to stand up again. I see two men . . . one has a gun.

  I gulp.

  The sound of a gunshot rings through the entire estate. It pierces the depths of my being. My heart stops. A tear clouds my eye.

  That didn’t just happen. I’m imagining it.

  My arms and fingers shake as I slowly stand up again. I have to look through the window one more time to make sense of everything. The shaking gets worse. I can’t make it stop. My eyes focus on the window. A man is on the floor. He isn’t moving.

  The other man is standing over him. He carefully backs away until I can see the tailored lines of his navy suit. He tilts his head so I can see his profile - a pointy nose and gaunt cheekbones. He almost looks like a walking skeleton.

  My instinct is to hide so he can’t see me or find me. I take a step backward and nearly miss a fallen twig.

  The man turns. I see the full form of his face. My heart pounds as he looks in my direction. My lungs stop working. I gulp down air as fast as I can.

  Run!

  I turn and sprint into a grove of trees. They look endless in the distance. I doubt I’ll be able to find my way back but that’s the least of my concerns at the moment. I hear a shout behind me. Leaves under my feet make crunching noises. I make the mistake of looking over my shoulder. The skeleton man is chasing me. I have to run faster.

  I hear the noise of a river up ahead. My body jolts back as I nearly miss jumping into rushing water. I glare at the river bank on the other side. My eyes scan the shore for a better way across. One doesn’t exist. I’ll have to chance it. I hear more yelling behind me and it’s enough to push me into the cold water.

  I force my body to move against the current but it’s strong. My swimming skills are no match for it. I inch closer to the other side, keeping my head almost fully submersed. The river shows me mercy and I climb out at a spot farther downstream. I don’t know where I am anymore.

  I listen to the trees rustling.

  No footsteps.

  No yelling.

  The skeleton man is gone.

  I rub the sides of my arms. My teeth start to chatter. A gust of wind chills me clear down to my bones. I need to keep moving. I jump up and down to keep myself warm and continue walking. My brain is on overload. I never thought anything remotely like this would ever happen. I thought maybe I’d see Dane, throw a pebble at his window, and spend the night talking about our relationship.

  I can’t believe I let myself think that.

  I pull out my cell. No service. My hands start to shiver. My lips have a hard time moving. I squeeze water from the side of my shirt. My shoes are covered with mud and they sink into the dirt when I walk. I stay close to the rocks and boulders.

  I pass a dark opening and stop. I crouch down, looking over my shoulder. I crawl inside to shelter myself from the freezing wind. I sigh and immediately something moves next to me.

  My whole body jumps.

  I am too shocked to scream. A hand touches my knee. I hear a cough.

  “Hello,” a voice says. My heart leaps.

  “Dane?”

  The figure leans closer. I see the shape of Dane’s face. His eyes look heavy and his skin is pale.

  Something is wrong.

  “Mikki?” he coughs. “Oh . . . you really are an angel.” His voice is low and soft.

  “Dane, are you okay?” I bite the corner of my lip because I know the answer to this question.

  “Babe,” he manages to reply. “You need to get me a hospital.”

  Chapter Twenty Four

  “It was a mistake.”

  Dane puts his arms around me. I’m surprised he has the strength. He doesn’t hold me as firm as he normally does. I can hear his slow and steady breathes. I thought I’d know what to do when we saw each other again. I wanted to see him so bad, but I feel guilty.

  I can’t push Kade from my mind.

  “You’re freezing,” Dane says in almost a whisper.

  “I went through the river,” I gulp. Dane looks down.

  “I’m sorry. I never should have told you where I was.”

  “How can you say that?” I pull away. I have no right to be cross with him after what I did with Kade but I can’t help it. He’d probably be dead if I’d stayed in Seaside.

  “Those men back there.” He pauses. “I had no idea things would turn out this way.”

  “Me neither,” I reply. “But I’m here now and you need me.” I can’t tell him about last night until he’s safely in a hospital bed . . . at the least.

  Dane looks into my eyes. He leans forward and gently kisses me. I let him, but my stomach is churning. His hands feel my wet t-shirt. He tugs at it, wringing out more water. He rubs the side of my cheek as it shivers.

  “When I was running,” he whispers. “I just thought of you and it kept me going.”

  Ouch.

  I smile. What have I done? I’v
e ruined us.

  “We need to get you to the hospital,” I answer.

  “Yeah,” he agrees. He kisses me on the cheek. “And when I’m all stitched up we can finish talking about going away together.”

  I gulp.

  “If that’s something you still want?” he adds.

  “Of course.” My reply is automatic. A breeze blows through the rocks and I shudder. The last time we spoke in person I told him I was ready to spend the night with him. Dane knows that he’d be my first.

  Not anymore.

  How am I supposed to tell him what happened between Kade and me? It was a mistake. I was drunk and depressed. My cloudy head even played tricks on me and in the moment I thought I was with Dane.

  “I made you a promise that night in the park. I promise you I’m yours when this is over.”

  “And your family?” I respond, testing the waters. The grin leaves his face.

  “Trust me, you don’t want to get involved with them.”

  A.k.a. we are still keeping our relationship a secret.

  I slowly nod, glancing out into the sunny sky.

  “You know where we are?” I ask.

  “Yes.”

  “And . . . you don’t think-”

  “Try not to worry about being followed,” Dane interrupts. “The second we’re in town those guys will back off.”

  “How can you be so sure?” My hands go shaky just thinking about what I saw.

  “I just know.” He sits up and attempts to stand. I jump to my feet and grab his arm to help steady his balance. He’s limping. His hands are folded around his stomach. We inch into the light and I see just how pale his face really is. It scares me. The fiery spark has left his eyes.

  “Which way?” I glance in every direction. My chest pounds as I search for a face hiding behind the bushes but the skeleton man is nowhere in sight.

  “This way,” Dane instructs. We begin walking in the opposite direction of Bristlecone. I feel like we’re getting more and more lost as the forest becomes denser.