Disintegration ba-1

by Anthony DeCosmo

  "And that’s how I know that memories are what make us who we are. I know because Richard Stone would not have survived in this world without this gift. The memories of great victories or how to rig generators or hunt game; all of that gave me confidence and strength."

  She turned and faced him, her face slightly askew, puzzled by his words.

  He made a finer point: "I’m a cheat. Without this, I’m nothing but a car salesman, and not a very good one, either. All the memories this thing has given me…and the skills; that’s why I’m a leader. Not because I’m brave or smart, because other people were brave and smart and now I’m standing on their shoulders. I’m a fraud, Nina."

  Nina grabbed his face with both hands and pushed her lips against his. When she finished, she pulled away and spoke her mind.

  "Information, Trevor. That’s all. How to do things, what worked in the past…that’s all this is. What you do with that, that’s what makes you special."

  "Don’t you get it? With this, anyone can be a hero."

  "Not just anyone, Trevor. You. You got this gift for some reason. Not me, not the others. You. Did all those memories give you the resolve to charge down that hill? Did these memories make you reach out to me? To show me who I could be?"

  He opened his mouth but no words came out, so he shut it again.

  Nina lectured, "Sure, you’ve got some pretty fancy tools. But you have to use those tools, Trevor. Being a leader isn’t just about what you know or what skills you have, it’s about what you do with all that. Some men would take these gifts and use them for their own gain. You use all this to save your people. I’ve watched you listen to advice when you needed it, or block everything else out when you knew you needed to be decisive. I saw you kneel before me in the rain, Trevor, just so I’d stay. You put aside your ego for the good of the cause. You’d do anything. You’re no fraud, Trevor."

  "I never wanted this. It’s no gift. It’s a curse."

  "That’s why you make such a damn good leader."

  He shook his head; "I’m not the man you think I am. I’m…less."

  "Now you listen to me, because I don’t know what you’re saying. I love you. I don’t love you because you fly alien ships or can shoot good. I love you because you care about people and you cared about me. You brought feelings out in me that I never had before. You believed in me. None of that came from memories," she pointed toward the mystical object. "I would love you if you weren’t the great leader. I would love you if you were still just selling Chevrolets. And I’ll tell you what…if I could have any wish at all, I would wish that you and I could live in that dream world where we didn’t have to be something; we just lived."

  He hugged her and said, "I’d like that, too."

  – It would be their last night of being in love.

  They lay together in bed and whispered as he massaged her with gentle caresses, as he felt the magnificent strength and warmth of her body. She purred softly at his touch.

  He studied her and wondered; he wondered what path the future held for her. He wondered if she would find someone else. If she did, would he be happy for her, or jealous?

  They explored one another a last time. A desperate time. They could feel the ticking of the clock; the certainty that dawn marched toward them, that a new day would come and steal away all the days that had come before.

  Tears flowed even amidst the sighs of satisfaction. The embraces became frantic clutches.

  When finally their love had been fully satiated, they lay together and dared not sleep because then the next moment would be morning. So they whispered more. They whispered as long as they could.

  Slowly their tired eyes wavered, their exhausted bodies begged for rest; they slipped stubbornly into sleep.

  Time ran out.

  35. Sunset

  The June sun rose over the mountains to the east. Its glittering beams reflected across the gentle waters of the lake and shined on the balcony of the mansion.

  Trevor Stone stood at the glass doors watching the sunrise. How he hated to see it.

  Nina Forest emerged from the bedroom and glided to him with a blanket wrapped around her body. It draped to the floor as if a gown.

  She shared the view and said, "You’re up early."

  Trevor, dressed in khaki cargo pants and a black shirt, kept his eyes on that dreadful sunrise.

  "It’s going to be a long day."

  When he said no more she walked away mumbling, "I suppose I had better get ready."

  He finally faced her.

  "Nina…"

  She paused to listen, but what more could be said? They had said it. Whispered it. Cried it all last night.

  She flashed a soft, sad smile then continued on to the bedroom. Trevor returned his gaze to the view.

  Jon Brewer knocked at the half-open hallway door then walked across the room and stood by Trevor’s side.

  "Everything is set."

  Trevor did not even blink.

  Jon stepped closer.

  "Are you okay?"

  Trevor considered.

  What a question. What was the answer?

  He told a transparent lie in a monotone voice without pulling his eyes from the glow on the horizon: "Sure I’m okay. Just another day of walking the path. Another day of doing what I’m supposed to do; of being a link in the chain. Just another day."

  Jon swallowed, glanced around, then returned from whence he had come. His footfalls echoed on the wooden floor.

  Duty called. Trevor followed Jon toward the hall. Half way across the room, he stopped and turned to view the rising sun one more time…

  …The captured alien shuttle now named "Eagle One" flew lead with two more of the magnificent crafts on its flanks, all three flying south through the rays of morning. The nose cone pushed through banks of misty white clouds drifting beneath a blue sky.

  Inside the cockpit, Nina Forest felt as if she were surrounded by that blue sky, feeling as if it were her nose pushing through the clouds.

  An illusion, of course, constructed by the navigation goggles.

  She had manned the controls since take off and had not stopped smiling the entire trip. Trevor observed from the co-pilot’s seat, sharing her excitement.

  "This is amazing," she repeated for about the one-hundredth time. "I’ve never…never flown anything like this."

  Dunston flew Eagle Two in the formation. His voice announced the end of the journey: "Approaching the LZ. Ground team reports area secure."

  Trevor pushed the transmit button on the control panel.

  "Eagles Two and Three, give us a bulls eye to land on."

  Nina jumped, "Wh-what? You’re going to let me land?"

  "Your last lesson…"

  …Garrett "Stonewall" McAllister watched the flight of ships approach from the north. Scattered around him lay the remains of The Order’s abandoned outpost: blast craters, crumbled walls, and destroyed doorways left from last autumn’s battle. Human and K9 soldiers guarded the perimeter as well as the inner corridors.

  Two Eagles swooped over the outer walls. The vehicles descended parallel to one another into the courtyard and landed, leaving enough space between them for the third airship…

  …"Just relax," Trevor soothed. "You’ve got to see outside but you still have to watch your monitors on the panel."

  Nina did just that, balancing the superimposed image broadcast from the exterior to her eyes with the reality of the control panel inches in front of her.

  She wiggled the flight sticks left then right. Her feet worked the pedals to modulate the force of the anti-gravity circuitry.

  The ship that had once belonged to aliens but had become a human machine eased toward the Earth and landed perfectly between the other two shuttles. The landing gear bounced gently as the springs absorbed the weight.

  Nina sighed and removed the goggles.

  "That was amazing. Thank you."

  Trevor told her, "That’s it. There’s nothing more I can teach you."
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  "And now I forget it all."

  He shook his head and assured, "You’ll fly one of these again some day. You’re a pilot and this is an amazing plane. You’ll be in that chair again. I know it."

  They stood and moved to the closed cockpit door. She placed a hand on his wrist.

  "Thank you for teaching me this; for having faith in me…for…for everything."

  Nina spoke without tears. Neither of them had any tears left to shed.

  He touched her cheek.

  "You have been…you are the best thing that ever happened to me. I am more when I’m with you. I will be less without you."

  "At least you get to remember it. I won’t even have the memories."

  He told her what he feared to be the truth: "You’re getting the better deal."

  Nina forcefully answered, "You remember. Do you hear? Remember for both of us. It’ll hurt, but don’t let this…don’t let it mean nothing. Please. For who I am now. Don’t forget."

  He took her in his arms one last time and hugged her tight. She squeezed back as hard as her tired muscles allowed.

  "I will. I will always remember…"

  …Shepherd exited Eagle Two and joined Nina, Trevor, and a K9 escort that included Odin and Tyr. Stonewall led the group into the main building.

  The walls that had seemed damp and alive to Trevor last year now felt stale and dead. Whatever pseudo-life they once held, Jon’s raid had exorcised. However, Johnny reported success in finding the enzyme needed to chase away the parasite in Nina’s head.

  Grenadiers and soldiers lined the route. Portable lights and generators carved patches of light and dark. Bones and decayed flesh marked where The Order’s defenders fell last year.

  Stonewall brought them to a room with a low ceiling. Small compartments lined one wall in front of which stood a table apparently grown from the floor. Trevor recognized the kind.

  Reverend Johnny beckoned Nina, "Rest here my dear."

  "Do I need to get undressed or something?"

  Johnny shook his head ‘no.’

  "You will be on unconscious for a few seconds as we apply the counter agent. The devilish thing that has housed itself in your person will dissolve almost instantaneously and evaporate into nothingness."

  Trevor helped her ease onto the slab. He held her hand. Reverend Johnny produced a medicine bottle of chloroform.

  "This will start your journey," he poured a dab on a cloth and reached toward her. "Breathe deeply."

  Trevor grabbed Johnny’s wrist and found Nina’s warm blue eyes one last time.

  "Goodbye."

  She smiled nervously and squeezed his hand tight.

  Trevor released Johnny’s wrist and allowed the doctor to continue his work.

  The Rev spoke as Nina breathed the anesthetic. "O Lord, hear my prayer, listen to my cry for mercy; in your faithfulness and righteousness come to my relief."

  She breathed deeply, her eyes closed, and her body grew still. Her hand went limp in Trevor’s grip. He let go.

  Johnny extracted a line-about the size of a garden hose-from one of the compartments. At the end pointed a thin needle, the sight of which sent a shiver along Trevor’s spine.

  "What is that?"

  "It is The Order’s version of a hypodermic needle. The incision is tiny, almost microscopic. Yet, it will inject the counter enzyme directly into the implant. However, if she were awake she would feel intense pain. I believe it is designed for pain, to be honest. That is the way of The Order; pain and misery."

  Trevor swallowed hard and accepted the Rev’s explanation. Still, he hated the idea of such an ugly thing touching his Nina.

  Shepherd stepped forward. He would be the only face she knew when the deed finished.

  Johnny pressed the needle into the side of her head. Trevor heard a slight sound of liquid running. After a few seconds, he withdrew the vile contraption.

  "It is done."

  Johnny used a cloth to wipe the tiniest hint of blood from Nina’s scalp. Trevor saw no mark or scar; no wound whatsoever. Nothing left behind; no trace.

  The men hovered over her for several minutes until she stirred. Her eyelids flickered, and then opened to see Shepherd standing overhead.

  Nina tried to sit but wavered and nearly fell from the table. He steadied her balance.

  "Shep? Wh-what? What is happening?"

  Nina saw others in the room. Her eyes narrowed as she glanced at them one by one.

  Trevor found her blue eyes. Her icy blue eyes.

  She returned his stare and asked, "Do I know you?"

  He wore a stoic face, shook his head slightly, and answered through clenched teeth.

  "No."

  "C’mon, easy does it," Shep encouraged her to carefully step off the table. "This way," he said and she followed on wobbling legs.

  Trevor stared at the empty space on the table…

  …The Eagles’ anti-gravity circuits pushed off the earth and propelled all three ships skyward. The craft merged into formation and flew away from The Order’s empty base.

  Once they had cleared the outer walls, the charges placed throughout the dead complex detonated. Explosions ripped one after another after another. Destruction came in a series of blasts. Burning debris spew into the air like a volcanic eruption. Walls crumbled.

  Still more detonations followed. They would leave no piece of the place standing. No memory. No tribute. No clue. Nothing would be left of that nest of misery and torment.

  The sound of the explosions roared like an angry, forlorn voice shouting toward the heavens. The flames consumed everything. Fireballs rolled skyward. Complete destruction. Total annihilation.

  Disintegration.

  – Trevor did not fly home. He turned the ship over to another pilot and sat alone in the passenger area with only Tyr for company, curled in a ball by his Master’s side.

  He had promised to remember, and remember he did. He remembered seeing her sleeping on the bed in the guestroom…only to have her nearly break his neck. He remembered the furl of her brow the time she had tried to outwit him with hand signals…and the shock on her face when he announced he could fly an Apache.

  He remembered changing his morning habits to catch a glimpse of her at breakfast…he remembered her in the rain storm the night she tried to leave and how that scared him…then the overwhelming desire to bare his feelings to her and the joy of seeing those feeling returned.

  The disaster of their initial date but she had laughed…the night they made love for the first time…finding comfort in her arms after the disaster at the gateway…the fantasy that was New Year’s Eve as they had stood on the balcony and felt the world belonged to them.

  Memories of a dream…

  …Trevor marched to the command center and shut the doors.

  Nina Forest-the latest newcomer to the estate-had walked off with Shepherd after they landed. Shep had a lot of explaining to do. He had to tell her a lot of things. There were nearly as many things he could not tell her.

  As the day went on, he picked at dinner but could not eat. He tried to nap in an empty bed but her scent remained on the pillow. Instead, he stood on the balcony as the sunset behind the mansion bringing the darkness of a new night.

  – Shepherd pushed open the door to Nina’s apartment. Odin darted inside and slumped into his favorite corner.

  "This is your place; you’ve been living here since last fall."

  Nina stepped in to a stranger’s living room with a stranger’s furniture.

  "Here, huh? This is too much," she meant all the day’s revelations.

  He rested his hands on her shoulders.

  "I know. It’s going to take some time. You need to get a good night’s sleep. All your stuff is here. You know how to reach me."

  Nina pointed toward the Elkhound.

  "This dog is mine?"

  "K9," Shep corrected. "He’s not so much yours as he is a friend. You can trust him."

  She had so many more questions, eve
n after Shep spent hours telling stories. Yet even she knew her mind could take only so much. The rest would have to wait.

  "I ‘reckon I’ll be back in the morning. Everything is okay. You’re safe here. Just…just try and get some sleep."

  He smiled one more time, nodded, and then descended the outside stairs toward the driveway. Nina watched him go then closed the door.

  She had no idea where to begin or what to do, so she strolled around the living room snooping for signs: signs that this unfamiliar place could possibly be her home.

  Nina found weapons and tactical outfits and other clothes in the closet; clothes in her size but she doubted she would ever wear anything like the black party dress hanging there.

  Something caught her eye. A light from a cabinet on the far end of the living room. She stepped over there and leaned close. The light came from a button. She pushed it.

  The speakers of the stereo came to life and played a melancholy melody. I'm always walkin' after midnight, searchin' for you…

  What is this? Is it…the least bit…familiar?

  No. She had never heard this song before.

  Still…nice. Sad but kind of sweet. It made her feel a little better but, at the same time, it gave her a strange feeling in the pit of her stomach. She did not understand; she wasn’t hungry. Could she be getting sick?

  She stood there…listening…wondering. I go out walkin' after midnight,

  Out in the moonlight,

  Just hopin' you may be

  Somewhere a-walkin' after midnight, searchin' for me…

  36. Time

  The Humvee sped along the Cross Valley Expressway. Two escort vehicles followed at a respectful distance.

  Trevor sat in the passenger’s seat meandering through pages of reports, updates, and proposed plans attached to a clipboard. Jon Brewer drove the car and Tyr rode in the rear.

  Jon did not typically serve as Trevor’s chauffeur, but they had been in the middle of a meeting when Dante’s urgent call had been piped through to the new meeting hall in the basement of the mansion.

  Dante refused to explain the emergency, forcing Trevor to the road. With the new autumn offensive only two weeks away, Trevor and Jon could not afford to miss meeting time. Therefore, Jon volunteered to drive them from the estate to meet Dante in Kingston.