Another Saturday Night and I Ain't Got No Body (A Page Turners Novel)

by Marts, Jennie

“You win,” Jake cried as he collapsed on the floor, the green shag carpet rough against his outstretched arms. He closed his eyes and was catching his breath when the offensive, crusted- and now wet with slobber- material dropped onto his chest. Jake’s eyes fluttered opened to see Beau’s giant head leaning toward him, a drop of slobber clinging to his lolling tongue as warm breath panted into his face.

  Jake grabbed the shirt and rolled just as the slobbery drop left Beau’s mouth and descended to the carpet below.

  He held the shirt gingerly in one hand as he carried it into the kitchen and got a trash bag from the box under the sink. Jake had hoped this was just an old work shirt and the brown stains were paint, but upon closer examination, Jake was fairly certain the sleeve was covered in dried blood. His worry and frustration deepened as he chastised himself for not getting here sooner.

  He dropped the shirt into the bag, tied it closed, and then grabbed his car keys before he opened the back door for himself and Beau.

  The dog raced outside and ran around the yard, sniffing bushes and spots of grass as Jake carried the trash bag to his car and locked it into his trunk.

  Heading back into the house, the dog at his heels, Jake looked up to see the curtains in Edna’s kitchen drop quickly back into place.

  “That nosy old woman sees everything,” he whispered to Beau. “Now, if I can only get her to trust me…”

  11

  Following Jeremy into the basement, Sunny prepared herself for a lot of things. What she wasn’t prepared for was walking into a room filled with six people and eight computer stations. The room was decked out in so much technology, it looked like NASA.

  As they walked in, a few of the men looked up and gave Sunny appraising glances, but the others were too intent on whatever action was happening on their screen to notice her.

  The basement was a large room with one side a typical living room complete with couch, coffee table, and television. The other side of the room was a wall of shelves with a counter that ran the length of the room at about desk height. Four cubbies were spaced along the wall and laptops or PCs were set into each one.

  In the center of the room, four cheap, particle board desks sat back to back to make a large workstation. Each desk also had a computer on it. Rows of cords and wiring snaked across the floor connecting computers to power strips and wall sockets. Some of the cords were duct-taped to the floor while others ran pell-mell across the room as if they were the tentacles of a giant computer beast.

  Three men and one woman sat at the desks in the center of the room. Two other men sat at the far cubbies against the wall.

  “Hey, everybody. This is Sunny, my date for the evening.” Jeremy nodded at her as he placed the overweight pooch on the floor beside the first man who sat at the desks against the wall. “Sunny, this is John, the owner of this fine establishment, and the proud papa of our beautiful Priscilla here.”

  John reached out to shake Sunny’s hand, and she passed the plates of pizza to Jeremy. John wore an open, friendly grin and had a warm handshake. “Nice to meet you. Thanks for filling in tonight,” he said, as he slipped one foot from his flip-flop and absentmindedly began massaging the dog’s back with his bare foot.

  “You’re welcome,” she said. “But Jeremy hasn’t filled me in yet on what we’re doing here this evening.”

  “We’re playing an MMORPG,” said one of the men at the desks, “and we need to get started.”

  “A what?” Sunny asked.

  “A Massive Multi-player Online Role-Playing Game,” said the woman, with a roll of her eyes. “They like to use technical jargon.”

  “I’m Rachel,” she continued, “and this is my husband, Mike, and his brother, Bill.” She pointed first to the dark-haired man who sat next to her, then across to a younger version of the dark-haired Mike.

  “Bill and Nick work with me at the office.” Jeremy gestured to the two men at the desks. “Bill brought Mike and Rachel into the game.”

  “This is our bi-monthly date night,” Rachel said. “We’ve all played this game every other week for over a year now. It’s something fun to do together and a date night away from the kids for Mike and I.”

  “The guy sitting behind John over there is Tim.” Jeremy waved to a short, heavyset man with thinning blond hair.

  “Nice to meet you, Sunny,” Tim addressed her with a nod. “Have you ever played World of Warcraft before?”

  “No, I’ve never even heard of it.” Sunny heard Mike let out a groan behind her. “But I like games, and I’m a quick learner.”

  “Well, you better be, because we’re all waiting for you two so we can start our raid,” Mike said.

  Sunny looked blankly at Jeremy who had set the pizza and beer on the counter and was setting up the two laptops closest to them.

  “It’s easy, Sunny,” Jeremy assured her. “You’ll catch on really quick. Here, have a seat.” He pulled out the chair between himself and John and gestured for her to sit. He moved the two laptops closer together.

  Sunny was intrigued by this game idea and everyone in the room seemed to think it was fun. Feeling a little intimidated by the closeness and experience of the group, she listened intently to Jeremy’s instructions.

  “World of Warcraft is a game played on many different realms. Everyone in this room has built a character and has played long enough to build up to be level eighty players,” he said.

  “Is that good?” she asked.

  “Yes, that’s very good. That means they’ve done countless quests and fought a ton of battles. We meet here every other Saturday night and play the game as a team with a bunch of other players online. We’ll do a ten-person raid tonight so we’ll battle together until we reach a Boss, or a really big dragon, then we’ll fight him and take him down together.”

  Sunny was fascinated by the images on the screen. The colors of the computer-generated world were vibrant blues, greens and purples, and the details of the castles and the trees and the animals were wonderful. Jeremy brought up a character on her screen of a dwarf with long reddish-blond hair wearing a purple shirt covered with gold stars, holding a shield and a mace. A black panther paced in the background behind the dwarf.

  “I’m going to let you play one of my characters tonight,” Jeremy said. “This is Hesiod. He’s a hunter, which means he specializes in ranged attack, which is bows and arrows and things you throw.”

  “Cool. He looks kind of like Gimley from Lord of the Rings.”

  “Yes, he does. That’s because Gimley was also a dwarf. Now, this beautiful beast behind him is his pet. Her name is Cocoa Puff.” This elicited a few snickers from the men around her, but Jeremy ignored them and continued his instructions. “I’ve set her so she will attack anyone who comes near you.”

  “Go, Cocoa Puff!” Sunny cheered. “But what if I get near one of you? Will she attack you?”

  “Good question, but no. We are all in an alliance together, and you or your pets can’t hurt any of your friends or your alliances you’re doing the raid with. You won’t fight us; you can walk right through us if you want.”

  He clicked on a box labeled Enter World, and Sunny’s dwarf suddenly stood in a village looking at a water fountain.

  “Wow. This looks just like Belle’s village from Beauty and the Beast,” she said, only to elicit another groan from one of the dark haired brothers.

  “My character is Stroszec, who is also a dwarf, but I’m a Paladin, which means I’m a Defender of the Light. I specialize in…”

  “Killing puppies and punching kittens,” John filled in.

  Sunny looked up at him horrified as the men in the room broke into laughter.

  “Be prepared for plenty of Junior High humor with this crowd,” Rachel told her, good-naturedly.

  “He’s teasing you,” Jeremy said. “Really, I’m speced for Retribution, so I carry a two-handed weapon, and I hit people really hard.”

  He used both his mouse and Sunny’s, and she watched as their characters ran
through the woods to a copse of trees where a group of assorted characters stood in a large huddle around a doorway that glowed with a bluish light.

  Jeremy pointed out each character as he introduced them to her.

  “So, this enchanting creature is Rachel.” He pointed to a tall, svelte woman dressed in blue and gold with long, flaming red hair. Quite the opposite of the cute, chunky five-foot two blonde who sat across the room.

  “My character’s name is Aliya and I’m a Mage, so I stand in the background and cast spells while my brave husband goes in and fights.” Rachel smiled over at her husband, who was currently wearing a scowl. “This is Mike’s character, Zeus.” She pointed to a tall, dark haired man whose outfit was adorned with spikes and skulls. “He’s a Death Knight, so he uses diseases to fight with. His brother is Prometheus, he’s the one next to him in blue, and he’s a healer. John’s character is a healer, too. John and Bill will help heal us when we get hurt in battle and restore our health levels.”

  “Tim’s character is this little gnome that looks kind of like him.” Jeremy razzed his friend. “His name is Bankerboy, which is clever because he is a loan officer at the bank, and he’s a warlock. In the game, not at the bank. So he creates soul stones to give you so you can come back to life if you die.”

  “Good to know.” Sunny was a bit overwhelmed by all the information, but loved how they were so into the characters and the game setting. She tried to keep track of the names and the traits of each player.

  “Nick’s character is a Night Elf Druid who can change into different animals. He’s our Tank so he’ll change into a huge bear, go into the fight first, and start killing everything in sight.”

  “Okay. I think I’ve got the gist of it. Who is this other woman?” Sunny pointed to a blonde woman dressed in blue and purple. She was holding a bow, and a white tiger prowled near her.

  “That’s Kynsya. She’s a human hunter, and that’s her pet, Chaos,” John explained. “We don’t really know who she is. Anyone can join your raid if you don’t have enough people, and she asked to play with us tonight. I hope she knows what she’s doing.” He looked pointedly at Jeremy. Sunny got the feeling not everyone was overjoyed at her joining the fun tonight.

  “John’s our group leader so he can let other people into our raid,” Jeremy said. “Kynsya is good. I’ve played with her before.”

  “Are we ever going to start?” Mike asked.

  “Let’s do it,” Jeremy said. “It’s on like Donkey Kong!” he cried to the others in the room before quietly telling Sunny, “I’ll help you as we go along.”

  The characters all grouped together, stepped through the portal, and the raid began. Jeremy showed her how to move forward and shoot her weapon at monsters. Mostly she just wandered around lost trying to figure out how to move her character. Sunny’s pet killed more monsters than she did.

  “Hey, look, if you press the space bar, you can jump,” Sunny said, excited with her accidental find and pressed it to jump her character up and down several times. Evidently, everyone else in the room knew this trick because no one seemed to achieve the same level of excitement she did.

  They spent the next two hours strategizing their game plan, going on quests, fighting different battles, and moving their characters from place to place.

  Sunny spent most of her time trying to find the battles, figuring out how to shoot her gun, and getting herself killed. The healers spent a lot of their time restoring her health each time she died. Jeremy tried to help her, and John and Rachel gave her a lot of helpful tips. Most of the others tried to pretend they didn’t know her.

  In the battles, Jeremy’s character tried to protect Sunny and so did, surprisingly, the new character to their group, Kynsya. She stepped in and saved Sunny several times, including once when she was facing the wrong direction.

  The game had a dialogue box in the corner where people could talk to each other and none of Sunny’s comments were flattering.

  As a grade school teacher, she was used to comments like, “You gave it your best!” and “I can see you’re really trying.” And simply “Good job!” The comments Sunny got were, “Why do you keep *#!*#! jumping up and down?!” and “Try not to get killed this time!” and “Fight or get out of the way!”

  The only ‘good job’ Sunny got was “Good job getting yourself killed again!”

  She was repeatedly called a Noob and Sunny leaned over to Rachel to ask her what that meant. “Do they think I’m playing like a girl? Is Noob code for Boob?” she asked.

  “No.” Rachel laughed. “Noob is short for new-bie because they can tell you’re new to the game.”

  “Basically, it means you suck,” Mike said.

  Rachel elbowed him in the side. “Be nice.”

  “Well, she does,” he mumbled. “You shouldn’t have shown her how to tell a joke. I was fighting three monsters and she was right beside me and all she did was jump up and down and tell me a knock-knock joke.”

  It was a fairly complicated game, and Sunny couldn’t remember all the keys and functions to fight and do damage.

  “I swear I don’t even know how I caused an ‘aggro’,” she said, but evidently her actions drew the giant dragon they were battling to attack and kill their whole raid, including the healers.

  “Well, that was just great,” Bill grumbled.

  “Sorry you guys,” Sunny said weakly. “You all were doing a really good job.”

  Her positive reinforcement comment was met with grumbles and sighs as they all began to shut down and pack up their equipment.

  “I think we’re gonna head out.” Jeremy guided Sunny toward the stairs before a lynch mob could form. “I’ll come by and pick up my stuff tomorrow.”

  “It was really great meeting you all. I had fun playing your game with you,” Sunny called as they headed up the stairs.

  John followed them up, and Sunny thanked him and apologized again for the whole dragon killing them and ruining the game thing. She had a surprisingly good time tonight. She loved watching the interactions of the friends in the room and how they worked as a team in the game. Her ego was a little bruised at how poorly she had played, but she was a World of Warcraft virgin, and the others had been playing for years.

  “Don’t worry about it. You added a whole new level to our game, Sunny.” He smirked at Jeremy. “See ya Monday, Bro.”

  The ride back across town was fairly quiet. Sunny tried to reassure Jeremy what a fun time she had, despite her obvious lack of gaming abilities. She thought he must have had a whole other idea of how this night was going to go in his head.

  They pulled up in front of her house, and Jeremy looked at his watch. “It’s only eight-thirty. It’s still pretty early if you want to do something else.”

  In all honesty, the allure of going into her house, taking a hot bath, and curling up on the sofa was pretty strong, but Sunny felt like Edna had tried so hard to set up this date the least she could do was give it another few hours. Plus Jeremy was kind of cute, and he seemed like a nice guy.

  “Okay. What did you have in mind?” she asked.

  “How about we go back to my house and watch a movie. I have a big screen TV and a pretty extensive movie collection. I think I even have some popcorn.”

  “Sure, let’s watch a movie.” That’s probably what she would do at home anyway. “Why don’t I get my car and follow you over so you don’t have to drive me home again.”

  “I don’t mind at all.”

  “It’s silly for you to leave once you’re already home.” Sunny pushed open the door and climbed out. “I’ll just follow you.” This also worked better for her, so if the date started to go south, she could make a quick getaway.

  Sunny got into her car and backed from the driveway, giving a longing glance to her house and the comfy afghan she could be curled under. Gazing at Walter’s house, her thoughts suddenly had Jake curled under that afghan with her, and they weren’t watching television. She envisioned that hot bath and leanin
g back into Jake’s soapy slick chest.

  Sunny followed Jeremy’s truck out of the neighborhood and tried to refocus her thoughts on her current date. She didn’t want to disappoint Edna, who had been really excited about Sunny meeting the grandson of one of her oldest friends. Jeremy had certainly been a huge step up from the last two dates she had been on, and he was trying.

  Besides, who knew how long Jake was even going to be in town? He could go home to wherever, or he could be going to prison for murdering her neighbor. Sunny resolved to put ‘dangerous’ Jake out of her mind and focus on ‘safe’ video game guy, Jeremy.

  They had driven into a newer, upscale neighborhood, and Jeremy pulled into the driveway of a large, beautifully landscaped house. Sunny parked on the street and met him at the front door.

  He ushered her into the foyer of a large living room tastefully decorated with man-sized, comfortable-looking furniture, nice artwork on the walls, and a thick Berber rug on the floor in front of an immense gas fireplace.

  Jeremy led her through the living room into a huge kitchen decorated in shades of maroon and gray, with gleaming black appliances and shiny Corian counter tops.

  “Wow! You have a gorgeous home,” Sunny told him as she planted her rump in one of the stools pulled up to the center island.

  “Thanks. My mom did a lot of the decorating.”

  “That’s nice. You two must be very close.”

  “Oh, we are. My parents divorced when I was in grade school, so growing up it was just my mom, my brother, and me. My mom is awesome. You want some wine?”

  “Sure.” She watched him smoothly slide wine glasses from a rack under the counter and pull a bottle of wine from a small wine cooler. He poured two glasses and set one in front of her.

  “So, action-adventure or chick-flick?” he asked. “I’ve got a ton of movies to choose from.”

  “Comedy.” She picked up her wine glass and followed him into the living room. A large flat screen television covered one wall and recessed shelving flanked either side of it. He did have a huge selection of movies, and she poked through his section of comedies and chose one with Hugh Grant. His dry sense of humor could always make her laugh.