Even Heroes Cry, Fords of Nashville, Book 1

by Hildie McQueen

  "You, of course," Cleve replied with a flirty smile. "Can't go long without checking on my girl."

  Tears sprung at his words, she'd not realized how lonely she'd been without her circle of friends. "How are Susie, Phil, and Amanda doing?"

  "Honestly I haven't seen them since you left. We're planning to do after work drinks later this week, but without you to corral us, we are a lost lot." He laughed. "I'll be surprised if we do meet."

  Tesha let out a breath. "Let’s go to town and have lunch. I have so much to tell you. I want to hear all about what you've been doing."

  Cleve motioned around the room. "Great. I'll look around while you get dressed."

  "Good idea. I'll be back in a few minutes. I'll just jump in the shower and change. Help yourself to a drink, the frig is stocked."

  Tesha hurried past the men who'd resumed working. Once in her bedroom she closed the door. It would be nice to spend time with Cleve, to forget about the house and be away from Adam for a bit. Although she knew he'd not meant to hurt her feelings, it was hard not be angry with him. To admit to herself, she had expected more from their encounter. She was madly attracted to the man and it wasn't his fault.

  Chapter Six

  The hammer landed squarely on his thumb. Adam let out a ripe curse that had more to do with his mood than the pain. Jerry Pike glanced over, but seemed to sense he'd not welcome any sympathy.

  Tesha's friend however was not as insightful. The man who somehow managed to look overdressed in a t-shirt and jeans, neared. "Ow, that's gotta hurt. Want some ice?"

  When he glared at him, the guy shrugged and walked down the hallway towards Tesha's bedroom. Adam narrowed his eyes at the retreating man's back. For whatever reason the Cleve character kept moving past her door, the entire time examining the walls and peering into rooms. Inspecting the workmanship no doubt. Adam had a hard time picturing the guy holding a hammer, much less installing drywall.

  Tesha emerged wearing a short yellow sundress and sandals. A tiny strap slipped off her shoulder. He remembered pressing his lips to the exact spot. Her eyes met his at that moment, as if she read his thoughts, she pulled the errant strap into place.

  She looked away. "Cleve?"

  Cleve? Really, what kind of a name was that? The guy appeared through a doorway. Together they went into a back room. Not wanting to overhear them, he began to hammer nails into the wall one after the other.

  A few moments later, the couple returned. From the corner of his eyes, Adam took Tesha in. Her hair was in place, her lip color intact. What an idiot her boyfriend was. After all these days apart, he'd not kissed her yet. Adam ignored the sense of relief at knowing he'd been the last one to kiss Tesha.

  She paused behind them. "Jerry, Adam, this is my friend, Cleve."

  Jerry did not hesitate to shake hands with her friend. Adam simply nodded at the guy, thankful for the hammer and nails he held.

  Tesha gave him a befuddled look. Maybe she feared her boyfriend would find out about the kiss. "We'll be back late so I'll see you both tomorrow then."

  He couldn't be a jerk to her. "See you tomorrow."

  They left in Cleve's car.

  "They make a handsome couple, don't you think?" Jerry asked and resumed humming.

  "Yeah, handsome," Adam grumbled under his breath.

  He wondered if the guy was spending the night.

  That evening, his house loomed empty and dark as he moved around the kitchen. He'd not cooked much since he'd begun helping Tesha. Admittedly since having a reason to get up every morning, he'd felt better, no flashbacks or nightmares in over a week.

  The doorbell rang and he wondered if it was Tesha. No one else ever visited. His brothers didn't count. They came in without knocking, each having a key to the house. When he opened the door instant regret at not looking through the peephole first slammed him.

  Valerie, his ex-wife, strolled past him not bothering to utter a greeting. She swung her long blond hair behind her shoulder and placed a hand on her hip. Valerie was tall, thin, and very attractive. Her shrewd green eyes scanned the surroundings before returning to him. "How are you, babe? I ran into Jensen in L.A. He told me you'd moved here. I am worried sick, had to rush over to make sure you hadn't totally lost your mind."

  She didn't seem worried, much less sick. "I'm sure Jensen would have told you if I had." He was going to kill his brother. They'd seen each other at their parents’ home, just a week earlier and Jenson hadn't mentioned running into Valerie. Then again, being the hottest leading man at the moment, Jenson Ford was in high demand. His brother jetted from one city to the next. Probably didn't think it important if he even remembered.

  Valerie's heels clacked on the wooden floors as she moved to the kitchen. Once she placed what was no doubt an exorbitantly expensive purse on the counter she perched on a barstool. She took in the empty space. "I can recommend a decorator."

  Before returning from Afghanistan, he wondered many times what he'd feel when seeing Valerie again. The letter ending their marriage was delivered to him at the medical unit right after he was shot and flown with the other injured men to safety.

  After he read the letter, it became a battle of what hurt worst, the wounds or her betrayal. Now three years later, he realized with relief, the only thing he felt at the moment was apathy.

  "Does your television executive know you're visiting me?"

  She gave him an indulgent smile. "I am not seeming him any longer. Didn't Jenson tell you?"

  "He didn't mention you at all."

  Valerie attempted to hide the surprise of his statement by rolling her eyes. But he knew her well enough to have seen it when she'd inhaled and frowned for a second. "Yes, well, it was a mistake. After everything was said and done, I found out he was a farce. His series was cancelled and the network let him go for unspecified reasons."

  "Your gravy train dried up." Adam almost laughed. He retrieved two beers knowing she'd balk at drinking from a bottle. "Beer?"

  "You know I don't drink beer."

  She rounded the counter and neared him. With an upward curve to her perfectly painted lips, Valerie ran her hands up his arms. The familiar aroma of her expensive perfume reminded him of better days with her. Of a time when she'd professed loving him. A love that ended when he'd decided to join the military. Although they didn't need the money since his investments continued to earn more than his Army pay, she hated losing the social status of being a CEO's wife.

  "Adam, let's try again. I never stopped loving you, not really. I made a mistake. You and I had a good thing. Our relationship deserves a second chance, don't you think?” She cupped his face with both hands. "I missed you terribly."

  "I've been back for almost three years."

  "I know. It’s just that it wasn't until I saw Jenson did I find out where you were. You changed your phone number and moved. I called both of your other brothers. Tristan said some horrible things and Caden hung up on me."

  He'd have to remember to buy his brothers a drink next time they got together. "I'm not interested, Valerie."

  "Are you seeing someone?" She blinked up at him attempting to draw tears. "If so, I am sure you'll never feel about anyone like you did about me."

  "I was a busy executive at the time, Valerie. Too blinded by your beauty and supposed feelings to analyze what exactly I felt."

  "You are hurting me." Valerie finally succeeded in producing a tear. "I won't believe you stopped loving me. I refuse to."

  He stepped away and drank deeply from the beer. Then motioned to the dining room table. "I was about to eat. You're welcome to join me."

  "I'll have to stay the night regardless. I didn't see anything other than a dingy roadside motel within hours of here." She went back to the barstool. "Do you have any wine?"

  She'd attempt to seduce him. It would be a colossal mistake to sleep with his ex-wife, not just because she'd come up with some ridiculous reason to remain longer, but also because it would send mixed signals. No, it was better no
t to prolong an already bad situation.

  Since the kiss with Tesha, his body had not stopped demanding release. However, release would not come with his ex-wife. His body might not be selective, but he was.

  They managed to make it past the evening meal. Valerie did not relent, constantly bringing up things they'd done together, hinted at their lovemaking while flirting the entire time.

  Dinner parties, travel to the Caribbean, jaunts to Napa Valley. It could have all been a movie. The Adam Ford who lived that life no longer existed.

  The doorbell rang and this time he prayed it would not be Tesha. He ignored it until Valerie stood. "I'll get it."

  "No." He moved past her. "Sit, finish your wine."

  Tesha looked up when he opened the door. He would have groaned, but held it in. She still wore the enticing yellow sundress. With a timid smile held up a small basket with two muffins. "I made muffins. Cleve loves them. I wanted to give you a check for what I owe you so far and also apologize for earlier..." Her eyes moved past him and widened.

  Valerie neared and placed her hand on his shoulder. "They smell amazing, good thing you brought two." She reached for the basket. "Although they are huge, I couldn't possibly eat an entire one."

  When Adam did not make to introduce them, Valerie nudged him on the shoulder and giggled. "I apologize for my husband. I'm Valerie Ford." She held out her hand. "He didn't used to be so awkward around people."

  Tesha managed to recover enough to shake Valerie's hand. "I'm Tesha Washington. I moved in next door a couple weeks ago."

  "Really?" Valerie stuck her head past the doorway and looked towards Tesha's house. "It looks like it needs a lot of work."

  Her expression told more than words of her disapproval of the house. "I suppose you got it for a steal."

  Tesha took a step back and attempted a smile, but didn't succeed. "I don't want to bother you two. Didn't realize you had company."

  "Seems to be a day for unexpected company," Adam replied.

  "I surprised him." Valerie kissed his cheek and Adam couldn't make up his mind if Tesha thinking he was married was a good thing or not. It would certainly keep her away and safe.

  Valerie however wanted to make sure Tesha understood he was off limits. "Adam and I are discussing renewing our relationship. We've been through a little thing, but our relationship is definitely getting stronger. Isn't it, sweetheart?"

  "If you say so." Adam leaned away from Valerie, but she remained plastered against his side. "Thank you, Tesha."

  "Oh, I almost forgot. Mr. Shanty returns tomorrow so..." Tesha left the rest of the sentence unsaid. "Anyway, thank you very much, for everything." She hurried down the porch steps and headed home.

  Adam didn't bother speaking to Valerie when the door closed. He went straight to his bedroom ignoring her pointed look. He didn't owe her any explanations, of course if anything, it was probably a good thing she'd been there when Tesha appeared.

  He was angry and truthfully jealous of the guy who was there alone with her. It tortured him not to be the one who sat in the kitchen and watched her bake while listening to music and possibly dancing for him.

  A growl escaped at admitting to himself how often his mind wandered to Tesha. More than attraction, he felt an emotion, closer to caring than anything else. Something he could not afford to ever feel.

  He glanced at the door and considered locking it. If his ex-wife planned to spend the night, she'd have to figure things out herself. His brothers always managed, so could Valerie. Especially since she'd invited herself.

  Through the window he saw lights on downstairs at Tesha's house. The silver Camaro was still present.

  What would have happened if Valerie had not been present when she'd come over? Would he have demanded clarification of who the guy, Cleve was? And probably make a total fool of himself. He wondered if Tesha's boyfriend had insisted he pay Adam and tell him not to return. It seemed convenient that Mr. Shanty was returning just after the guy appeared. Perhaps the Cleve guy suspected something.

  Adam lay on the bed atop the covers with his head on his hands. Footsteps sounded. Valerie came to his door and opened it. "Adam?"

  He grunted in reply. "Go away."

  In true Valerie fashion she ignored his reply and entered the room to stand over him. "Can I sleep with you? There aren't any other beds in the house."

  "No."

  She wore only a bra and panties. "I didn't pack any pajamas." Her lips curved when his gaze scanned over her fit body. "I am yours for the taking. You know that, don't you?" Valerie lowered onto the bed and inched over until she lay next to him. She pressed a kiss to his jaw. "I missed you."

  Adam closed his eyes. It would be so easy to give in, to have sex with her and to hell with the consequences. Why keep from enjoying what she offered? He placed his hand on her hip and looked down at her. "I don't love you."

  "But you want me." Valerie slid her hand past his stomach, her fingers surrounding his hardening length. "You're so big, Adam. I miss how good you feel inside me."

  Adam rolled over her and pinned her arms over her head and looked down at her. "Why did you leave me?"

  "Let's not talk about that now." Her eyes skimmed over his face to his lips. "Kiss me."

  He kissed the throbbing vein on the side of her throat. "Tell me."

  Valerie moaned and lifted her hips to press herself against his arousal. "You left me. Had to go and join the Army. It was the rashest thing. What was I supposed to do?"

  Like being dunked in cold water, he lost all desire and pushed up and away from her. Adam stood and glared down on her. "You never even tried to understand."

  "How could I? You're an idiot." Valerie sat up and yanked blankets over her. "Had to go and be a hero. What did it get you? It didn't bring your friend back, did it? Your friend is dead and the towers are still gone."

  Cruel words were Valerie's weapons of choice. Adam gestured to the bed. "You can sleep here. I'll take the couch."

  "Fuck you," she screamed as he grabbed a blanket from the closet and went downstairs.

  Echoes of the explosion vibrated in the air. Screams and smoke competed with the heat and searing pain surrounding him. Adam's side throbbed, the flesh ripped wide open, sliced by metal and who knew what else. A grimy hand stretched toward him out of the floating, swirling sand and he reached for it. "I can't help you."

  More hands appeared, every one begging to be saved and he tried frantically to move toward them, but his feet were so heavy. It felt as if one hundred pound weights were tied around his ankles. Drawing from within, he dragged himself forward inch by inch. When he clutched the first hand, it slipped from his grip. To the right, a dead soldier lay. His unseeing eyes locked to him and seemed to blame him.

  He could barely move, his sluggish body refusing to do as his brain commanded. Another soldier appeared. Drenched in blood, the man fell face first onto the ground. An explosion sounded, more screams.

  Darkness enveloped, closing over the scene and he screamed. Not yet. He had to help them. There were so many hands.

  Adam shouted digging into the darkness. "No!" A bright light burst overhead followed by a loud bang. He fell face first onto the ground and covered his head with both arms. "God, make it stop."

  A low moan came from his right side. Someone was there he was sure of it. If only he could help them, if only they weren't so far out of his reach. "Where are you?"

  There were no replies, no hints to where the wounded lay. How could he help them? Vinnie's face became visible and he hurled forward. "I'm here. Hold on." Tears fell, his eyes burned from the combination of smoke and despair. How was it possible? His friend was dead, yet he seemed alive, his hand reaching for him while mouthing for help.

  Every muscle trembled from the exertion of dragging himself toward Vinnie, he prayed to make it to his friend in time. Finally he grasped a handful of uniform and yank himself closer until he lay panting over his friend.

  "I've got you. I've got you." Adam lo
oked into his friend's eyes. They were still, unseeing, his mouth gaping open, blood oozed from his nose and ears. "No." Adam pressed his forehead against Vinnie's. "Don't leave me."

  "No!"

  Adam tumbled off the couch and landed on the floor with a loud thump. His heart banged against his sternum with so much force he wondered if it would break free. Air refused to fill his lungs, but he tried again and again to gulp it down. With shaky hands, he grabbed at the sheet tangled around him and wiped the sweat from his face.

  The buzzing in his ears was soft but grew louder. He covered them with both hands and scurried to the corner of the room. With his back to the wall, his widened eyes attempted to see into the darkness. Was someone there? The noise was too loud to know for sure, but those hands reached still. The screams although barely audible were there.

  "No. No. Stop." He gulped back the cry that threatened when his vision turned red. Streams of blood trailed down the walls in thick ripples and pooled on the floor. He recoiled, but the pool grew wider until he couldn't avoid his feet touching it. "God, please..." Adam rushed to the other side of the room and began to do push-ups, his eyes shut. "One. Two. Three. Four...."

  After his arms gave out, he flipped to his stomach and continued with sit-ups, one after the other, exhausting his body. The counting helped some, the visions dimmed until finally they were gone just as the sun crept out, lighting the room with the promise of a new day.

  "Adam?" Valerie walked into the kitchen a couple hours later. She'd taken great care with her appearance. Already make up in place and wearing jewelry, she looked ready to head out. Valerie lifted a brow and gazed to where he sat drinking coffee. "Oh, there you are." She paused waiting for him to acknowledge her.

  "Leave."

  "Why are you so damn mean to me? I came to try and reason with you. I traveled all this way to attempt to work things out." She plopped into a chair opposite him.