Begin Again (Home In You Book 2)

by Crystal Walton

  Drew tossed the shell in the water. “Maybe I got it all wrong.”

  “Not possible.”

  Confident as ever. He laughed. “What makes you so sure?”

  “Our daughter.” Annie twisted what looked like a non-traditional wedding band on her ring finger. “I got remarried a few years ago,” she said slowly. “Have really tried to turn things around. Do them right this time.”

  After an uncertain shake of her head, she faced him. “Maybe we both lost our way, Drew. But you’ve never stopped being an anchor for Maddie. If you ask me, that one right choice trumps a whole lot of wrong ones.”

  It wasn’t about being right or wrong anymore. He had to let go of his pride. “Annie, Maddie deserves the choice to know her mom. And I know I can’t protect her from every hurt she’ll experience. But I only want to open this door if you’re going to keep it open.”

  “Does she want it open?”

  “That’s for you to ask her.”

  Annie curved a curl around her ear. “What if she says no?” Her voice barely crested the splash of the waves.

  “Luckily for both of us, she inherited my dad’s compassion.” Drew wiped the sand from his palms as he rose and then helped Annie to her feet. “The better question is what happens when she says yes?” He nudged her on. “I’ll let Cooper know you’re coming.”

  Fiddling with the hem of her shirt, she dawdled a moment longer. “For what it’s worth, your dad would be proud of who you’ve become.”

  He dipped his head without replying.

  “And Drew?” A few steps away, Annie turned. “Don’t let the right girl slip away. Ti left you something in the shop.”

  He stumbled over his board and the words he had to have misheard. “Wait, what? You talked to her?” The girl who hated getting up before noon had already gone to see Annie, of all people, before seven o’clock? This was bad.

  Annie spun and waved behind her. “Don’t take all day.”

  Thirty seconds of standing there, blinking, finally launched Drew toward the parking lot. He didn’t slow down until he crossed the shop door’s threshold.

  From behind the counter, Chloe didn’t bother thwarting a grin. “About time you got here.”

  Had Ti seen everyone today but him?

  Chloe motioned to an easel in the corner with her eyes.

  Drew’d sprinted the entire way here. But now that the gift Ti had left was only a few feet from him, it might as well have been an ocean’s length away.

  Chloe slid her purse strap up her arm. “I’m gonna go grab some coffee.”

  The door must’ve closed behind her, but his heartbeat overpowered every other noise. Uneasy strides brought him to a painting wrapped in brown paper on the easel and a photo album beneath it. An envelope taped to the front read, Open painting first.

  He ran his fingers along the canvas’ top ledge and tore into a corner of the paper. Strip after strip unveiled the sunset’s myriad colors blending into the ocean’s endless layers. In the center of the painting, Drew stood, gazing across the waves with Ti in his arms as they’d been the night he first took her to Springer’s Point.

  He padded beside him for a chair and folded into it, unable to look away from the moment she’d freeze-framed in time. Her back nestled into him, her soft hair billowing against his skin, the longing to care for her. It all welled up from a place inside—where she belonged.

  Drew slowly opened the photo album in his lap. Ti’s gift of seeing what others missed danced from each page with images he wanted as more than just memories.

  A spiral of nerves and desires kept him turning the envelope in his hands until the urge to hear her words trumped the fear of what she’d say.

  Drew, I’ve spent my life capturing moments I wished I could be a part of, always from behind a distant lens. Until this summer. Thank you for giving me moments I can paint from memory. Not as an artist, but as a girl who found love for the very first time.

  The note sank to Drew’s lap. The real-life details in the painting awakened every thought and feeling from that night. Including the choice he’d known was right even then.

  Not wasting another second, he grabbed his cell and tapped the last number he ever planned to call. “Marcus?” He didn’t wait for a response. “You still interested in buying my shop?”

  Chapter Thirty-one

  Home

  Ti scanned Livy’s room one more time. Clothes, toiletries, jewelry. She’d packed everything, hadn’t she?

  In front of the dresser mirror, Ti laid down the plane ticket Carter had given her and dodged her reflection. Good thing Livy had an early shift. Ti could hardly face her own sad eyes. Forget Liv’s. She turned the sea glass bracelet she’d made with Maddie around her wrist, the ache of already missing her twisting with it.

  One deep breath followed another and finally steered her focus to her suitcase at the foot of the bed. Shoes! How could she forget her shoes?

  A gentle knock on the door drifted into the room. Grandma Jo poked her head inside. “Thought I might find you here.”

  Ti clutched the closet door handle. “Please don’t make this any harder.”

  “Oh, I think you and Drew are doing a good enough job of that on your own.”

  Ti froze at her words but then squatted to the bottom of the closet and piled pairs of shoes in her arms. She stilled when she came to her flip-flops. She braced the doorframe with one hand, her balance lost in so many ways.

  The shoes in Ti’s arms clattered to the floor. Competing emotions drove her to her knees in a scramble to keep the broken pieces inside her from scattering across the carpet, too.

  Grandma Jo knelt beside her and helped her gather up the mess. “You know, when Maureen died, I questioned whether I had any right to stand in her shoes. Took me a while to figure out I wasn’t. I was stepping into my own.” She raised a brow at the spiky pair of heels in her hands and smiled. “Thankfully, mine didn’t come with a death wish.”

  Laughing softly, Ti took them from her and tucked them into the side of the bag.

  Grandma Jo sat back. “I’ve wrestled my share of doubts through the years, sugar. Not saying I still don’t question life at times. Might even be tempted to run when things get hard. But I’ll tell you what’s as true now as it was the day the Andersons took me in.”

  She covered Ti’s forearm with an age-spotted hand. “You sure enough can’t outrun the Father’s love. You get a hold of that truth, young lady, and you won’t be running no more.”

  The dam in the center of Ti’s chest finally broke. She darted up from the carpet. “I have to go.” She couldn’t let this woman who’d blindly welcomed her like a daughter see she was a child no father wanted.

  An echo of the assurance she’d felt in the ocean yesterday swept in as if countering the thought. But the harder she tried to soak it in, the harder the scars around her heart resisted. She grasped at Grandma Jo’s words like a life jacket. So many times, she’d almost given in to Drew’s pursuit, accepted a place in the family she’d always wanted.

  But how could she? Even if she wasn’t abandoned all those years, that didn’t erase them. Nothing she’d done since coming here had changed that. They followed her, lurking in the shadows as her dad had last night. She wouldn’t let guys like him near Maddie. She’d do anything to protect them.

  Chin down, Ti toyed with the clip on her bracelet again. “I know you don’t understand, but this is best for Drew and Maddie. That’s all I’ve ever wanted for them.”

  “Then take it from someone who wants the same. You’re what’s best for them. Your sins don’t change that. Neither do your daddy’s.”

  Ti whipped her head up. “How do you . . . ?”

  Grandma Jo patted Ti’s hand, rose, and strode toward the picture frames on the windowsill. “You don’t get to be my age without gaining a few insights.”

  While wedging the last sandal into her bag, Ti scoffed at the image of her dad having the nerve to show up here. “He said he came to
make amends.”

  “And you don’t believe him?”

  “Hard to believe even a decade of jail time could change the only thing that ever drove him. Doesn’t matter, anyway. He doesn’t deserve amends.” Ti shook her head and stood. “Regretting his mistakes shouldn’t keep him out of prison.”

  “And you think holding onto bitterness is going to release you from your own?”

  “It’s not that easy.”

  “Forgiveness never is.”

  Ti clenched her bag handles. “You don’t know what you’re asking.”

  “I’m not asking anything. I just want you to remember this.” At the dresser, Grandma Jo set a picture of Ti with Drew and Maddie from the day at the harbor on top of the plane ticket. “No one earns love, sugar. That’s what makes it a gift.” She gave Ti’s arm a good squeeze, turned, and left the imprint of her motherly touch behind.

  Ti gripped the edge of the dresser and pressed her lashes together. But instead of seeing the scene behind the picture frame, she saw it behind her eyelids as if reliving the day. Maddie’s sweet laughter blending into Jasper’s splashing in the water. Butterflies mixing with the safety of being in Drew’s arms.

  Livy’s words from the beach pressed in with Grandma Jo’s. Was she the one holding herself back? Ti had tried to do everything she could to love this family, but maybe she didn’t even know what love meant. She’d been too afraid to accept their affection. So certain she wouldn’t be enough to keep it. Even now, fear raged against hope.

  “No one earns love, sugar. That’s what makes it a gift.”

  Light stretched through the windows and curled around Ti’s shoulders with another answer she hadn’t expected. The Father’s love had been with her all along, hadn’t it? In the sunsets. In art, friendship. Even in . . . bringing her to Drew.

  Tears coated her cheeks as she looked from the plane ticket to her bags. Breathing in, she grabbed her cell and scrolled to the unknown number that’d been calling her. No matter what happened next, she at least knew where she needed to start.

  “Slow as midtown traffic.” Drew didn’t fully appreciate Ti’s annoyance at how slowly people moved around the island until today.

  In his Jeep, he let up on the gas before he ended up bulldozing the van in front of him. Wasn’t a bad idea, actually. He stuck his head out the window to get a look around the Toyota.

  Drew slumped back in his seat and banged the steering wheel. “Come on, already.”

  The radio clock practically laughed at him. He could tease Ti all he wanted for being free-spirited, but a lot of good his anal retentiveness was doing him now. He should’ve gone straight to the ferry first thing this morning, not to the beach. Now, he might miss her.

  Another glance out the window to the second lane revealed enough space to make the pass. Drew didn’t flinch. Gunning it, he swerved around the family van and cut back in front of them. “Sorry,” he said to the rearview mirror, as if they could hear him.

  With less than half a mile separating him from the ferry docks, Drew’s stomach groaned with his Jeep’s overworked engine. Even if he hadn’t missed Ti, would the things he came to say make a difference?

  A flock of seagulls trailed the edge of the island like they always did when following a ferry leaving port. The horn blew. He was too late.

  His Jeep coasted into a parking space, his heart somewhere behind him on the highway. Stomach still lurching, he left his door open and jogged up to the dock, where a state worker stopped him with an outstretched arm. “Sorry, sir. Can’t have you crossing that white line there.”

  The strip of faded paint stared at him from the concrete, but all Drew saw were the stains of missed opportunity.

  “Sir? You all right?”

  Drew blinked up from the ground, forked a hand through his hair, and backed away. “Fine. Sorry.”

  The man returned to his work while Drew scoured the docks for some means to get on the water without being arrested.

  “I hate to break it to you,” someone said from behind him. “But you probably won’t score a very successful ferry heist without a skilled partner.”

  An inch at a time, his feet managed to turn his legs around.

  Blonde again, Ti clipped her hair to keep it from blowing in the wind. “New Yorkers make the best accomplices. Especially when they’re hopped up on coffee. Gives ’em an edge.”

  “Is that right?” He sauntered toward her.

  “So I hear.” Her smiled stretched as wide as her giant hoop earrings.

  Maybe all hope wasn’t lost.

  Drew ran a knuckle over his jaw. “I’m kind of in a hurry. Know where I can find one?”

  “I might have some connections.” A gradual frown ransacked the sassy look in her eyes.

  Why wouldn’t it? He’d transferred his resentment of Annie’s choosing New York over him onto Ti so many times. In nursing his own wound of inadequacy, he’d unintentionally fed Ti’s. His shoulders fell. “Ti—”

  “My father was here.”

  “What?”

  “Last night, I saw him when we were driving back from getting Maddie.”

  His jaw ticked at the thought of the man anywhere near her. “Why didn’t you tell me? I would’ve gone with you.”

  “It’s my battle.”

  Drew knew those words inside and out. Had carried them around his neck for years. Staring at the reflection of what they cost had never struck deeper.

  Ti bit her lip and looked out toward the sound. “I worked so hard to prevent my past from owning me. Even moved back to Astoria last summer to open my art studio like I was really brave.” She released a terse laugh. “One phone call. One sound of my dad’s voice. That’s all it took for me to run again.”

  Everything in him wanted to hold her and make it all right. The pavement barely kept him in place.

  “I came to Ocracoke to hide, Drew.” She faced him then, hints of shame trapped in her blue eyes. “I never meant to dump my baggage on you.”

  Seeing the consequences of her dad’s choices taint her self-image stoked the slow burn already building in the pit of Drew’s stomach. If anything, it was the reverse. That two-hundred-ton ferry couldn’t hold all of his baggage.

  Ti ran her hands along her arms. “I thought he was looking for drug money, and if I stayed away for a while, he’d give up and move on. I should’ve told you from the beginning. I’m sorry.”

  She wasn’t the one who should be sorry. The veins on Drew’s arms throbbed above his balled fists. “What was he doing here? Did he hurt you? If he’s still here, I swear I’ll—”

  “He came for forgiveness.”

  Drew almost fumbled his keys. “What?” Of all the four-letter words that tore through his mind, that was all that came out.

  Ti nodded toward the distant ferry. “I just sent him off.”

  “What’d you say to him?”

  “You don’t want to know.” The ghost of her usual cheeky grin flittered across her lips. She stared at the water, sobriety taking over. “I told him I didn’t know where to start or how long it’d take, but . . .” A slow exhale through her mouth lowered her shoulders. “I’d pray for the strength to try.” She shook her head. “Grandma Jo’s words of wisdom can be annoyingly convincing.”

  She had no idea. But Grandma Jo wasn’t the only wise one. Strong and heart-achingly beautiful, this amazing woman stood before him, unaware of how courageous she truly was.

  It was past time for him to be the same. A deep breath closed the last few feet between them. He held out a hand. “Can I see your phone?”

  Ti cocked her head. “Why?”

  “I have some notes to make.” He motioned for her to hand it over.

  Reluctantly, she set it in his palm, still eyeing him like he was a crazy person. Maybe he was. Crazy enough to risk everything for the girl he loved.

  Drew scrolled to the voice recorder app, lifted it to his mouth, and flaunted the impish look she’d given him dozens of times. “The artist is one
seriously bossy New Yorker who can’t pronounce coffee to save her life. She challenges everything the owner says, always knows what he’s thinking, and is infuriatingly right all the time.”

  Ti perched her hands on her hips and scrunched her face at him.

  Forcing his gaze off her lips and back to her eyes, he inched nearer. “Her hippie-chick, free-spirited drive presses the owner’s buttons in every way possible. And heaven knows she drives him crazy, singing to herself nonstop.”

  When she gave him a shove, Drew kept her hand on his chest and edged closer still. He studied her face, his heart racing. “But he can’t imagine a day without her voice in his life. Without arguing over who has better dance moves, or watching her care for Maddie as her own daughter.” He swallowed hard. “Because no matter how scared he’s been to admit it, the truth is, the owner’s in love with the artist.”

  His ribs barely restrained his heart when he returned her phone. He brushed back the untamable strands of hair dancing across her cheeks in the perfect picture of who she was. The woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with.

  Drew searched her watery gaze filled with questions about all the unknowns. “Queens is your home, Ti. I respect that. And I know this opportunity in San Francisco is important to you. I’m not asking you to give any of that up. We’ll move wherever you decide to go. I’m selling the shop.”

  “You’re what? Drew—”

  “The shop was my dad’s dream. I took it on, trying to live his life, when really, he wanted me to find my own.” Sunshine warmed the back of his neck. “You know the real reason I chased the sunrise every morning? Because I needed to know how it got to start over every day when I couldn’t. I wanted to figure out my past. Why things happened the way they did.”

  He inhaled slowly. “Honestly, I don’t know why we’ve had to go through the things we have. I still haven’t found all the answers, but I know I’m not ready to let go of the one that matters most.”

  He angled his head and tipped her chin. “I’m sorry for the times I failed to love you the way I should have. And I can’t swear I’ll never make mistakes in the future, but I promise to spend every day learning to be the man you need me to be.” He curled his fingertips under hers. “For our family. Through every storm.”