by Amity Cross
“What can I say?” I said, looking him over in his character Jax’s ensemble. “I was intrigued.”
“I’m glad to see you, actually,” he said, making my heart flutter.
“You are?”
“I could use the distraction.”
Trouble in paradise? I wondered if he was fighting with Tessa again and if it had anything to do with him being at my apartment yesterday. At the thought of being a target for another catty attack, I felt a little sick to the stomach.
“Well, tell me about all this,” I said awkwardly, waving my hand at the chaos around us.
His lips curved into a smile. “Outside shoots are a little more elaborate than indoors,” he explained, pointing to the lighting rig. “Especially at night.”
“Candy gave me the rundown about that part. She said you need to do stuff in as little takes as possible.”
“Yep. Time is money.”
“If time is money, how do you learn your lines so fast?”
He winked. “Practice.”
I was about to cheekily ask him if he needed help when a man came up and tapped him on the shoulder. “Jude, we need you in five.”
He nodded, not taking his gaze off mine. “You can watch from behind the camera,” he said. “Just keep out of the way of the crew, and you’re set.”
Turning, my gaze crossed Tessa’s. She was wearing what looked like pajamas—a tank top and shorts, her feet bare—and her face was twisted into a scowl at the sight of Jude talking to me. Great.
“Break a leg,” I said to him, silently wishing Tessa would snap a femur.
He smiled and backed away toward his mark. “I hope not.”
I wrapped my arms around my middle and shivered even though it was still warm out. The summer air felt different than it did back in Australia, but that had nothing to do with how I felt right then. It had everything to do with falling into the middle of Jude and Tessa and not knowing where I stood.
The director called action, snapping me back to reality, and they began to film the scene.
As Tessa ran through the trees, the camera slid across the track, smoothly following her flight. I knew the part they were filming. It was the bit where Skye finds out that she came back as a demon and can’t control her powers. She freaks out and tries to run away, but Jax follows her.
Tessa ran for about thirty meters, frantically looking back over her shoulder and stumbling, then they paused the take, and Jude got into position, the effects for his vampire super speed to be added in during editing.
When they resumed, he grabbed Tessa around the waist, pulling her against his chest.
“I could kill you,” she exclaimed. “I could rip your heart out before I realize what I’m doing.”
Jude held her tight as she struggled and beat her fists against his chest.
“Let me go, Jax!”
He backed her against a tree, pinning her in place with his hips. “No.”
Lowering his face, he pressed his lips against her neck and began kissing her softly.
“We’ll figure it out, Skye,” he murmured. “Whatever’s inside of you...we’ll figure it out. I’m not giving up.”
Tessa raised her hands and pulled his mouth to hers. They kissed softly before pulling away and staring into each other’s eyes.
“I’m afraid,” she murmured, her eyes brimming with tears.
“I know,” he replied, his brow furrowed. “I know.”
They looked at each other poignantly for another few seconds.
“Cut!” the director shouted. “That’s a wrap on the scene. Take a break.”
Instantly, Jude stepped away from Tessa and stalked off the set toward me.
“Jude,” Tessa exclaimed after him, but he didn’t acknowledge her.
“Jude,” she cried again, and it was a wonder she didn’t stamp her foot like a child chucking a tantrum.
I shied away as he sidled up alongside me, feeling like a pawn in a game I didn’t want to be a part of.
“You and…” I began.
“We’re off,” he said with a shrug. “Have been for a couple of days.”
Ah, the whiplash thing Candy was talking about. Then that must mean he was in the single category when he came over yesterday. That screamed opportunity, and I wondered if I should be disappointed that I didn’t make a move, but a couple of days wasn’t kosher anyway. Realistically, I didn’t have the courage to make a move on anything.
“That must be hard,” I said, nodding toward the set.
Jude narrowed his eyes and shook his head. “That’s work.”
I understood, but I wasn’t sure I was the kind of woman who could handle having a boyfriend who had to act out kissing and sex scenes. Considering how I felt about him, that was yet another thing that drove a wedge marked ‘dysfunctional’ between us.
“Ah shit,” he said with a groan.
“What?” I was confused for a moment, and then I caught sight of Tessa leaning up against a tree, her eyes on us. She looked pissed. Seriously, her face looked like a cat’s bum, and the threat she’d delivered at the office came back to me with shocking clarity. “I can go and—”
“No,” Jude said. “I don’t want to get into it with her just yet.” He said just yet like they’d talk it out before they hooked up again, and it made me want to puke. “Wanna go for a walk?”
I raised my eyebrows. “In the dark?”
“Yeah, in the dark,” he shot back. “We’ve got a good fifteen, maybe twenty minutes.”
When I hesitated, he reached out, grabbed my hand, and pulled me through the trees, away from the lights and away from Tessa. His skin was warm against mine, his hold was firm, and it sent my thoughts scattering. Right then, I would’ve gone anywhere he led me. Seriously, he could be a serial killer luring me out into the forest to chop me into little pieces, and I’d still go.
I was still unsure about how I was meant to take him. Were we friends or just coworkers? I had the feeling that he still thought I was that awkward girl in the elevator or that I just wasn’t interested in him as more. That couldn’t be any further from the truth. Was I shooting myself in the foot by trying to play it cool? Did I have to play?
All I ever did was think about it, but deep down, I knew I wanted him to want me for the person I was. I knew I was into him, and it was more to me than just his looks or his job. I’d never considered it from my point of view. From his though, I definitely had.
Celebrities hooked up with celebrities. The beautiful walked hand in hand with the beautiful. It was all about the outside, and who you wore on the red carpet, and what was said in the gossip magazines. That life was all about the package and the marketing. I didn’t have any place in that world, and no amount of makeovers would ever put me there.
Stumbling through the leaf litter as Jude pretty much dragged me through the forest and into the darkness, I began to have heart palpitations. Maybe he was taking me out here to do away with me.
“If you’re bringing me out here to murder me, I assure you it’ll be a total downer,” I said. “I don’t think I’d scream, let alone struggle. Serial killers like the struggle. Or so I hear.”
Jude stopped and turned to face me, his grasp still firm on my hand. “I’m not going to kill you, Lux,” he said with a smirk. “You writer types and your crazy stories.”
I scowled. “You say it like I have an affliction.”
“Ha,” he declared, dropping my hand. “Maybe it’s a curse, living in your head, but I think it’s pretty damn awesome.”
I shrugged.
“Just take the compliment, Lux.”
“Fine,” I shot back. “Compliment taken.”
“Why do you do that?”
“Do what?” I asked, playing dumb.
“Shrug things off?”
I took a deep breath, not wanting to get into a discussion about my up and down past with the guy. So I’d been in a bunch of foster homes and had a shitty time. So what? Things were good now, and I only
wanted to look forward.
“Okay, let’s talk about something else,” Jude went on when I wasn’t forthcoming.
“Like what?”
“Anything you want,” he said. “What do you want to know about me?”
I cocked my head to the side. “That’s not already on Wikipedia?”
“You read my Wikipedia page?” His head angled to match mine, and I noticed his eyes seemed to have changed color again in the moonlight. “What do you know?”
“You’re twenty-six, grew up in Brisbane, and worked as a laborer before you moved to LA.”
He nodded appreciatively. “Impressive.”
“I wanted to know who I was working with,” I said, implying that I’d read everyone’s. Which I hadn’t.
He grimaced like he was disappointed and said, “Well, what do you want to ask?”
I thought for a moment, my mind going back to the kiss that Jude and Tessa had just shared against that tree. It was in the script, but it had looked pretty real to me. Real as in tongues and spit and the whole nine yards.
He laughed and shook his head. “Spit it out, Lux.”
“What’s the deal with on-screen kissing? Do you kiss kiss, or…”
“That’s your question?”
I shrugged. “I guess.”
“Well, there’s the whole closed-mouth kiss in old movies,” he said with a grin. “You know, where the actors would just press their lips together and move around.”
“Classy.” I felt my cheeks heat and wondered if it was dark enough to mask my embarrassment.
“Want a demonstration?” he asked.
“Uhhh…” I glanced back over my shoulder toward the set. Was he serious?
“Lux,” Jude said, trying to mask his amusement. “It’s cool.”
“Glad you find my awkwardness funny.”
He narrowed his eyes and scuffed his toe into the leaf litter.
“I’m not a virginal princess,” I shot at him.
“Didn’t say you were.” He stepped closer.
My gaze caught on his, and for a moment, I was stuck. I couldn’t look away. I could look at him for hours and not get bored, but he was staring at me with unknown thoughts swirling through his mind. Thoughts I desperately wanted to know. Then, all too suddenly, I broke under the intensity of his gaze and dropped mine.
“Lux—”
“How can you separate it?” I asked, returning my gaze to his, the kissing still well and truly playing on my mind.
“Why?” He tilted his head to the side, watching me carefully.
I shrugged. “It seems like an occupational hazard if you were seeing someone else.”
“I wouldn’t know,” he said after a moment. “I’ve not been with anyone else since I started acting.”
“No one?” I found that hard to believe. I was positive that women were bashing down his door and throwing themselves at his feet everywhere he went.
“I don’t…” He shrugged before taking a deep breath. “I just don’t like the whole revolving door thing. I want to know people.”
I bit my bottom lip. I wondered if he wanted to know me. Not just hang out but hang out. The more I talked with Jude, the more I wanted to know, and the more I wanted to be in his presence. My crush was spiraling out of control.
“You take me as the kind of woman who wants to know people,” he said, his voice low.
I nodded, my heart beginning to beat erratically. “I think a lot,” I murmured. “I like to know what’s underneath the surface. Why people do the things they do.”
He smiled like I’d just confirmed the million-dollar question.
“Jude!”
Blinking hard, I stepped back as the director’s voice boomed through the trees, my heart beginning to race.
“Shit,” Jude hissed, running a hand over his face. “We better go back.”
“Yeah,” I murmured in total agreement. “Yeah, we should.”
We ventured back toward the light in silence, my thoughts filled with Jude’s lips. Did we just have an ‘almost kiss’ moment? Our conversation had gone into the danger zone right from the get go, and his innuendo was becoming a recurring thing every time we were together. Maybe he was just trying to be nice and make me feel like a part of the crew.
If he tried to kiss me, would I let him? Did I want to get into that? I wondered what he’d taste like…spice, sweat, and dominance. I bet he was a take-charge kind of guy in bed. Overwhelming, obliterating… I was so deep in my lusty thoughts, I didn’t realize that my breathing had become shallow and my lady bits tingly. If Jude could read minds, it would be positively scandalous, not to mention mortifying.
Hell, did they make those nicotine patches for people with incurable lust? I needed a whole box, stat, so I could kick my bad habit.
“Lux!”
I glanced over to the trailer where Candy was waving me over, a little relieved that I was probably about to be saved from revealing my unrequited lust.
“I’ll catch you later,” Jude said absently before wandering off.
What the hell? I paused, watching him walk across to the director, confused at his brisk dismissal. Talk about an epic brush-off. It confirmed my earlier thought that he was just being nice. I watched him walk away, running my gaze over the strong lines of his back before going to meet Candy. She was in full costume, waiting for her call to set and was looking pretty bored.
I loved Candy’s costuming. Her character was this bohemian witch with crazy good style. She wore an assortment of raw crystal necklaces and rings, her hair was curled and long, and her makeup was natural with a slight tint of pink on her lips. Her clothes were a hybrid of skinny jeans and boots, and a long, flowing floral top with a black leather waist cincher over the top. In short, she had this wild, earthy vibe about her that had me wishing I looked exactly like that.
“You look great,” I said, standing beside her.
“They’re off again,” Candy declared, nodding toward the spot I know Jude and Tessa were probably standing, waiting for the director to call action.
“He told me,” I replied absently, my head still fuzzy.
“He told you?”
I glanced at her and shrugged.
“He told you on your little moonlit walk in the forest?” she asked again, trying to dig for more information.
I didn’t know what to tell her. There was nothing juicy about it.
“Candy, stop trying to make more out of it. It was nothing.” If I made more about it and there was nothing in it, then I wasn’t sure how I would be able to handle it.
But Candy didn’t seem as convinced as I was. Nothing my ass, she mouthed as the director called action.
Watching Jude and Tessa act out their next take, I tried to distance myself from the whole scene. I hadn’t even been here a month yet and heartbreak was not on the agenda. I couldn’t get hooked up on a maybe. When it didn’t pan out, I’d be the one who’d get hurt.
It would always be me getting off the elevator at the sub-basement.
Episode Eleven
This is a Montage
On August 18, 2016 at 11:38 PM, Lux Dawson
Hi Mel,
Sorry it’s taken me a while to email you back. Things have been seriously out of control over here. I didn’t realize that TV worked to such strict deadlines, and they’ve been killing me. If it wasn’t for the money, I would’ve taken a hike ages ago. ;)
BUT things have settled down a heap now that I’m used to how things go. I’ve got a routine going, which helps with catching up on sleep. I’ve written four solo episodes so far, and that was the ultimate pressure test, you know? I never thought I’d say it, but I enjoy the part where everyone rips it apart and sticks it back together. It’s like scriptwriter boot camp. It doesn’t feel weird because we do it to everyone, and I can see the improvement in my own work because of it.
Hmm… what else can I tell you?
I’ve been working on the next Scarlett Raven
wood book in my downtime, so that’s coming along.
Candy and I have been hanging out a lot, too. I reckon you’d get along well with her. She has this instant best friend vibe about her and is pretty much the most down-to-earth actress I’ve met so far. I haven’t met a lot of them, but next to Tessa Donahue, she’s a perfect angel.
Did I tell you about Tessa? She’s got it out for me big time because of Jude. Seriously, I can feel the daggers in my back even when she’s not here. They’re on and off again so many times no one can keep up with them. They’ve broken up twice since I’ve been here, and it’s only been four months. Talk about breaking a girl’s heart.
AND everyone has long forgotten that silly elevator thing…everyone except Tessa. UGH.
Anyway, I’m loving it here. It’s hard work, and the learning curve has been steep, but I love it.
Talk soon.
xoxo
Lux
* * *
On August 19, 2016 at 12:38 PM, Melody Andrews
OMG.
Tell me more about Tessa the epic bitch. And tell me more about that hottie JUDE. Spare no detail!!!!1!!
-Melody
* * *
On August 22, 2016 at 10:13 PM, Lux Dawson
Trust you to go straight for the juicy parts. ;)
I’ve hung out with Jude a couple of times now. He actually wants to talk to me, which keeps throwing me for a loop. He asks me all kinds of questions and listens to the answers. Is this guy for real?
Can I tell you a secret? It’s been killing me holding onto it, and you’re the only person who will understand. You know, me being an awkward Nigel No Friends and all.
I like him.
Just so you know, that sentence was epically hard to write.
I like being around him, but I fear the inevitable rejection if he ever found out I was attracted to him like that. If he knew, then he would steer clear. I think I’d miss our weird-ass friendship. I’d live with the unrequited love thing just for that. It would be agony, but I’m a junkie.
