He hadn’t told Emma about that little complication.
He’d do that tomorrow. When they’d both had more sleep.
Emma woke at Andy’s demand just after seven. With the baby right beside her, it didn’t take much effort to feed her. And now that she knew she was returning to Ryan’s ranch, where Billy would care for them, she felt a little more confident.
She wished she could have Maria again, too, but knowing Ryan was having to pay extra, she couldn’t ask for Maria’s assistance.
After she’d fed Andy, she burped the baby. Then she propped herself up against the pillows and talked baby nonsense to her daughter.
“Does she understand you?” Ryan asked, surprising her. He was leaning against the doorjamb, a small smile on his handsome face.
“Probably not. I’m sorry we awakened you.”
“Don’t worry about it,” he muttered, rubbing his neck. “Your couch may be just fine as a couch, but as a bed, it lacks about two feet.”
She apologized again, refraining from telling him it was his fault. She guessed she should bear some of the blame since she’d left without telling him.
“Are you hungry?” he asked.
She’d gotten spoiled at Ryan’s. Billy’s breakfasts were wonderful. “I’m afraid there’s not much here for breakfast, but I can—”
“I didn’t mean you should get up,” Ryan insisted, taking several steps toward the bed, as if he needed to hold her down. “I’m calling Billy. I figure he should have breakfast ready about the time we get there, if you’re ready to go?”
“Yes, I didn’t get much unpacked last night.”
“Good. I’ll load the suitcases. You wrap up the baby and we’re out of here. Can you manage that?”
“Yes,” she agreed. It was amazing how much better she felt to be included in the planning. “But I’ll have to get dressed.”
“Oh, don’t bother dressing. Just put on your robe,” Ryan tossed over his shoulder as he headed to the baby’s room.
She started to protest. Then she stopped. Why not? She could save her energy once again. She sat farther up and reached for the robe she’d left on the end of her bed. She slipped her arms into the sleeves and pulled it close around her. Then she gingerly slid to the edge of the bed and stood up.
Ryan strode past the bedroom door, the baby’s things in his arms. Emma hoped he’d left a disposable diaper in the room so she could change Andy. To her relief, she discovered he’d left several. She freshened Andy, then wrapped her baby in a blanket. She took a second blanket, larger than the first one, to wrap her again.
It was spring in Wyoming, but that didn’t mean warm. Most days it was in the forties, occasionally the fifties. Emma didn’t want her baby catching a cold with all their traveling.
Once they were loaded in the car, Ryan carefully drove them out of town. “Maria will be waiting for you,” he said casually.
“No!”
He flicked her a glance before he turned his attention back to his driving. “You didn’t get along with Maria?”
“Of course I got along with Maria. But I can manage. I don’t want you paying any more money for—to take care of me.”
He drove without speaking for several minutes. She wondered if he was mad at her again.
“Well, I think it will be cheaper to hire Maria than for me to stop working to take care of you. I can, of course, but—”
Emma was faced with a difficult decision. Let Ryan spend more money on her and Andy, or have him taking care of her twenty-four hours a day.
“I—All right, hire Maria. But I want you to keep track of the money you spend. I will pay you back.” She had her pride.
“I’ve got a better idea. My grandfather was quite a reader. He left me his library, but I don’t have the time to sort through it. I thought when you get feeling better, maybe you could design a library in one of the spare rooms and organize the books. I could pay you—”
“No!” Emma exclaimed again. “I’ll be glad to do it, but I won’t accept pay. I already owe you too much.”
“Great. I’ve felt badly about not taking proper care of Gramps’s legacy.” He never looked at her, and she wondered if he was serious, or if he was making up things for her to do.
Which meant he understood her pride. A tiny glow, deep within her, warmed her all over.
When they reached the ranch, he got Andy from the carrier and put her in Emma’s arms and lifted Emma from the seat, as he’d done last time.
“I can walk now, Ryan. I don’t run any races, but—”
“No need for you to when I’m here. Neither of you weigh much. I’m going to have to accuse Billy of starving you to death.”
It was a shock to realize he was teasing her. She rewarded his efforts with a tentative smile and mild protest. She hadn’t done a lot of laughing in the past seven months.
Billy was holding open the back door and greeted her with enthusiasm.
Emma expected to be taken to bed at once, but, much to her surprise, Ryan sat her down in a chair at the big table in the kitchen.
“What are you doing?”
Ryan smiled at her. “We’re going to be more social, remember? I’m going to take Andy to her bed, and then I’ll come back and join you for breakfast. And Billy, don’t let her eat my share before I get back.”
Then he lifted the sleeping baby from her arms and left the kitchen. When she finally stopped staring at the door, she discovered Billy was as stunned by Ryan’s actions as she was.
He looked at Emma. “Everything all right?”
How could she answer? “Uh, yes, Billy. The doctor decided I needed more care and—and Ryan offered to bring me back to the ranch. I hope I’m not causing you too much trouble.”
“Heck, no. It’s good to cook for someone who appreciates what I do. That bottomless pit never seems to care what I serve him,” Billy said with a smile. “Besides, that little baby is so sweet, I was gonna miss her something fierce.” He turned to the counter and set a large glass of milk in front of Emma.
Then, as he took plates kept warm in the oven and carried them to the table, Ryan came back in. “Grab a cup of coffee, Billy, and join us. Doc said it’s time for Emma to be a little more social.”
Billy’s eyebrows rose, but he did as Ryan asked.
Ryan was relieved to have Emma and baby Andy back in his home. He wanted to be sure they were well-cared for, he assured himself. His mother always said life was more fun when there were babies—baby puppies, baby chicks, baby calves. And most especially real babies.
She was right.
But he was a little panicked about making conversation with Emma. That’s why he was pleased that Billy joined them. Billy was a real talker. There wouldn’t be any dead silences with him around.
Except for the one lingering on and on right now.
“Uh, this food is good, Billy,” Ryan finally said, sending a message toward his cook pleading for help.
Billy obliged. “Glad you like it. Maria said she’d be along around nine.”
“Oh, good. Did you tell her we’d just need her during the day? She’ll be able to go home to Tommy in the evenings.”
Emma looked up. “I’m glad. I think he’d been complaining a little about her being gone so much.”
“Can’t blame him, little Emma. A man likes to have his woman around.”
Billy’s wink and nod toward Ryan had Emma’s cheeks turning to fire. She quickly ducked her head, staring at her breakfast.
“Billy, have there been any problems last night or this morning? Anything I need to check on once Maria gets here?” Ryan asked, hoping to change the subject.
“Nope, nary a one.”
“Good. Emma, I thought I’d make a run into town. I think we’re getting a little low on diapers. Is there anything you want? A book to read? Or I could rent some movies.”
“Boss, we got plenty—” Billy began, but he stopped when Ryan kicked him under the table. “What did you do that for?”
“Well, as long as you’re so set on going, why don’t you stop by the grocery store and get some of that fancy decaffeinated coffee your mama likes? I discovered last night we’re out of it. I made a fancy cake for their visit tonight and she’ll want some.”
All the color faded from Emma’s cheeks. “Your parents are coming tonight?”
Well, he’d intended to break that news gently, after she’d had a good breakfast. But she’d only taken a couple of bites before Billy spilled the beans.
“I’m not sure that’s a good idea,” Emma said, staring at Ryan.
Billy frowned. “They’re fine people, Emma. And they’ll love little Andy.”
But they wouldn’t love what she’d done to their son. The first time she’d met them, his mother had taken her aside to express her appreciation for Emma’s dragging Ryan out of his mourning.
But Emma was pretty sure having his baby and keeping her a secret wasn’t what his mother had in mind.
“I think it would be better if I didn’t see them,” she said, hating the way her voice shook.
“We’ll talk about it later, after you’ve finished your breakfast and gotten back in bed,” Ryan said, glaring at Billy.
“I’m not hungry,” she murmured, staring at her food in dismay. A few minutes ago, she’d been hungry. Now she wanted to crawl in a hole and never come out.
“I knew Billy was starving you to death. I ought to fire you, you miserable old cur,” Ryan threatened, winking his right eye, the one Emma couldn’t see.
“Aw, Emma, eat something else so I can keep my job,” Billy pleaded. But he overdid his acting.
“You’re a fraud, Billy,” Emma protested. “You both are. You know Ryan isn’t going to fire you.”
“You never can tell,” the old man insisted. “Just to be on the safe side, can’t you eat a few more bites?” Then, as she picked up her fork, he launched into a long wandering tale about a time Ryan supposedly threatened to fire him.
Ryan ate his breakfast as Billy talked. Somehow, Emma found herself doing the same, almost forgetting the fact that her baby’s grandparents were coming over to see her this evening.
She hoped they’d be gentle. They could ignore her, as she figured she deserved, but she wanted Andy to have it all…for as long as she could.
Chapter Six
Much to Emma’s surprise, after breakfast Ryan apologized for not coming in for lunch, explaining that he had to go to the far pasture, and he wouldn’t get back for the middle meal of the day.
“I don’t expect that, Ryan. The doctor didn’t mean you had to give up your job. Just—just occasionally speak,” Emma said, her cheeks bright red as Billy stared at both of them.
“Yeah,” Ryan said, not looking at her. “I’ll be here for dinner, though. Mom and Dad are coming for dessert. Take a nap this afternoon so you’ll be rested.”
Billy didn’t hesitate to speak his mind. “Who died and made you king?”
Ryan had been on his way out the door. Coming to an abrupt halt, he faced his cook. “What are you talking about?”
“You’re giving Emma orders like she don’t have any sense at all.”
Ryan glared at Billy. “I’m trying to take care of her, like Steve said. She needs to rest.”
“I reckon she knows that. Don’t you be chasing her off again.” Billy stood and began clearing the table.
Emma stared at the two men, unable to believe they were about to fight over whether or not she took a nap. “Please…Billy, I will need a nap. Ryan is trying to show concern about my well-being. The doctor said—”
“I don’t need your protection, Emma!” Ryan ripped back.
“Then I don’t need your concern. In fact, I don’t need to be here. Billy—”
“Don’t you dare leave!” Ryan roared.
“There you go again, giving orders. She don’t belong to you. You haven’t married her in spite of giving her a baby.” Billy stacked the dishes in the sink, not looking at his boss.
“Now I really am going to fire you, old man,” Ryan roared again.
Emma leaped to her feet, intending to intervene before someone said something that couldn’t be taken back. But as before when she moved too quickly, she grew dizzy. A moan escaped her, startling Ryan, and he grabbed her before she hit the floor.
“Damn it! You don’t have any sense at all. You can’t go jumping around like that,” Ryan protested and he carried her down the hall to her bedroom.
“I didn’t want you and Billy fighting,” she whispered.
“Wouldn’t be the first time,” Billy muttered, following Ryan.
Ryan lowered her onto the bed. “We won’t fight anymore,” he said gruffly. “We’re both trying to protect you, each in his own way.”
“Please, I’m fine. I promise,” she said, looking first at Ryan, and then Billy.
Ryan backed away from the bed, glad Billy was behind him. It stopped him from kissing her. He wanted to reassure her of his—concern. Yeah, that was it. Concern.
“Uh, I’ve got to go to work,” he said, staring at her. “Billy and I will get out of here and let you sleep. Maria should be here soon.”
Her gentle smile was almost his undoing. She was blaming herself, he could tell.
Billy followed him back into the kitchen.
“Billy—”
“Boss—”
They both stopped and stared at each other until he waved for Billy to go first.
“I shouldn’t have interfered,” Billy said, ducking his head.
“Hell, Billy, I shouldn’t have let it get to me. You know you’ll always have a job here. I’d never find such a good cook anywhere else.”
“That’s true,” the old cowboy said, raising his chin. “But you haven’t been doing right by Emma.”
Ryan sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. “I’m trying, Billy.”
“Now, you are. But what you said to her—”
“When?” he asked, frowning, hoping Billy didn’t mean what he feared he did.
“When you sent her away.”
“Damn!” Ryan muttered. “Look, Billy, she surprised me—I wasn’t prepared to—to give up Merilee and Ryan, Jr. Afterward I wanted to apologize, but I was afraid she’d think I’d changed my mind. So I didn’t. But I had no idea she was pregnant.”
“You didn’t?”
“No.” He didn’t say anything else, but Billy’s words explained his attitude the last few months. He’d been crustier than ever, barely speaking to him.
The cook sighed. “Then, okay. But she’s a good woman, boss. You be sure you treat her right. Last week—”
“She hates me, Billy. I thought she wanted me to stay away from her. But it made her feel unwanted. I’m trying to find a middle ground here. So we’ll be sharing our meals when possible. Wait dinner for me tonight.”
“Right, boss,” Billy agreed, a smile on his face.
Ryan got out of there before Billy asked any questions.
In spite of her long nap, Emma wasn’t feeling more rested that evening. She and Maria had bathed Andy and dressed her in a clean nightgown, which was all she had there for her little girl.
She’d bought several little terrycloth footed suits for her baby, but they were at her apartment. In all the emotional turmoil when she’d returned to the apartment, she’d forgotten to pick them up.
She knew Ryan had come home a little while ago, but then he’d left at once to go to the store. Maria had gone home to her husband, and Emma looked at her bed longingly. It was tempting to crawl in and cover up her head.
But she wasn’t a coward. So, she gathered up a clean nightgown and her robe and headed for the bathroom for a shower. By the time she’d finished, she was shaking again from exhaustion. She was glad she hadn’t decided to dress up for her guests.
When she came out of the bathroom, her hair blown dry but not styled, Ryan was waitin
g.
“Are you okay?”
She nodded, not mentioning her trembling legs.
“You look like hell!” he muttered and scooped her up into his arms.
“Thank you,” she said stiffly, refusing to relax against him.
“I didn’t mean—you’re pale as a ghost. Didn’t you get any rest?”
“Yes, I took a nap. I just need to sit down a few minutes. Then I’ll be fine.”
“Do you want to take another nap or are you ready for dinner? Billy’s got it ready.” He’d stopped walking, waiting for her answer.
“I’m ready for dinner. It will make me stronger. I’m sorry I didn’t dress, but—”
“Don’t be silly,” he growled and reversed his direction.
“I can walk to the kitchen, Ryan. I’ve been managing all day.”
After settling her in a chair at the table and telling Billy they were ready to eat, he stared at her. “So, that’s the problem? You’ve been doing too much.” He glared at Billy.
“Don’t look at me,” Billy protested. “She said she was okay.”
“No, please don’t fight! Please.”
Billy grinned, surprising her. “Not to worry. We’ve been fighting ever since he was six years old. He was even big for his britches back then.”
Ryan, obviously making an effort, too, said, “He wouldn’t let me have all the cookies I wanted.”
“Couldn’t bake that many,” Billy returned. “Now, you, Emma darlin’, can have whatever you want. Just tell me.”
“I knew you favored her,” Ryan protested, grinning.
Emma raised a hand. “Okay, okay, I believe you. You don’t have to work so hard at convincing me.”
Ryan exchanged a rueful grin with his cook. “Guess we’re not too good at this acting thing.”
Emma smiled at both of them. She couldn’t believe the difference in Ryan’s behavior. Even when they’d been having an affair, he’d tried to maintain his mourning. Of course, she hadn’t known his story then. She’d thought he was normally morose. “You’ll do. Something smells wonderful, Billy.”
Newborn Daddy (The Baby Secret) Page 6
