A Reason to Stay

by Melissa Ellen

  Surprisingly, it didn’t make us look as inconspicuous as I expected. It had a little more sex appeal than I would think after the lecture we received. I guess we were to be eye candy for the male guests. A look but don’t touch policy.

  I was struggling with what to do with my hair when Amber walked into the bathroom we were sharing to touchup her makeup. I had never seen her all glammed up before. She was a natural beauty with her long blonde hair and green eyes. The dress seemed to compliment her toned, petite body, which I never seemed to notice until now. She was a knock-out.

  “Amber, you look gorgeous!”

  She laughed uncomfortably, her cheeks blushing. “Thanks, but I wish I looked as good as you. I think that dress was made for you.”

  I brushed her compliment aside. It seemed we had modesty in common. “Ugh, I just wish they had brought in a hairstylist for us,” I joked.

  “I love doing hair! Let me help you.”

  “Really? Awesome. Have at it!” I passed her the curling iron letting her take over my wild mane.

  We gossiped as she curled and twisted my hair into a beautiful masterpiece. She gave my hair a final spritz of hairspray to make sure it held through the night before turning me to face the mirror. “All done!” she grinned.

  I loved it. She had swept my long brown hair into a loose, low messy bun that sat at the nape of my neck. She had left a few tendrils loosely curled and hanging around my ears and temples to frame my face. I thanked her profusely, finishing my make-up.

  Stephen knocked at our door as I was slipping on the black peep toe heels they had provided us. He escorted us both down the hall towards the chef’s kitchen to await for the party to start.

  The party seemed to spring to life without warning. One minute we were sitting in the kitchen impatiently waiting, and the next we were rushing back and forth between the great hall and kitchen to refill our trays. The number of guests was overwhelming. The arrival of limos and beautiful people seemed never ending.

  The great hall had been transformed into an elegantly decorated room for Mr. Blackwood’s fifty-fifth birthday. It turned out the couple I had assumed was Rhett’s parents were indeed the Blackwoods. But I was so focused on the job I was doing, I had completely forgotten all my nerves. It also helped that we were hours into the party with no sign of Rhett. Maybe they weren’t his parents or maybe he was a son who couldn’t be bothered with his dear old dad’s birthday party. Either way, I lucked out.

  My tray of champagne was down to four glasses with multiple empty ones sitting atop it. I maneuvered my way through the throng of people back towards the kitchen. As I passed the opening from the great hall to the main entry, my eyes caught sight of the one man that could disrupt my night, halting my body. Rhett was standing in the entrance, his arm linked with the same stunning blonde from the other night, greeting his parents.

  As if he felt my eyes burning into him, he turned his head, locking his eyes on mine. Knowing the effect his stare could have on me, I immediately looked away, rushing into the kitchen, my heart already racing.

  Stephen had been filling his tray and was turning to leave when he stopped, catching me by the arm. “What’s wrong? You have that look again.”

  I’d already told him about Rhett, and I was sure he’d figured out by now they were the same group that had visited Christopher’s the other night, so there was no point in lying.

  “Rhett, the guy I bumped into, is here… and of course, I’m stuck carrying delicate glasses of champagne which is a recipe for disaster,” I sighed my irritation.

  Stephen just laughed at me. “Ava Conner, if I didn’t know better, I would think you had a thing for this guy.”

  Exasperated, I exclaimed like a child, “I do not!” He arched his eyebrow with no other response. “He has a girlfriend or a fiancé. He’s with someone!”

  “Since when does that matter, as long as they aren’t married,” he taunted.

  “Well they could be married. I have no idea, and I don’t plan to find out,” I added decidedly.

  He was enjoying getting me all worked up. Thankfully, he finally decided to lay-off and be a friend. “Do you want to switch and run food instead of the champagne?”

  It was a nice offer, but I knew that would just mean admitting to myself and him that I did have a thing for Rhett. And I wasn’t prepared to do that. “No,” I declined, “It’s fine. I can handle it.”

  He shrugged his shoulders and gave me a wink, leaving me in the kitchen.

  I took a minute to calm down while watching Mike, whom seemed in his element. Christopher had specifically chosen Mike to come help him with the event. It seemed he viewed Mike as a budding chef. I knew Mike was a talented cook, so I was glad someone like Christopher was taking time to mentor him. I refilled my tray before wiping my clammy hands down my skirt. Picking up the tray, I took a deep breath as I exited the kitchen.

  I kept my distance from Rhett and the blonde bombshell, hoping that Amber would make her way over to them instead. He didn’t seem to notice me or look my way since that moment in the entry, and he made no effort to seek me out like he had in the pub. I spied from afar as they milled about the guest, making conversation - the blonde never letting him venture far from her touch. I couldn’t help feeling jealous. I didn’t blame her, though. If he were mine, I would probably be just as possessive.

  When my bladder started to fail me, I worked my way through the room back into the kitchen, asking the head housekeeper if it was possible to take a restroom break. She gave me a nod, telling me to be quick. After using the restroom in the server’s quarters, I took a minute to freshen my makeup before returning to the party. I closed the bedroom door to leave, turning around to find I wasn’t alone. The light pounding in my chest increased in force as I clang to the door knob like a safety net.

  There in the server’s hallway stood Rhett. Neither one of us spoke. He was so close I could smell him. He smelled sinfully good and was looking at me with a fiery expression, unwillingly I was doing the same to him. He was dressed in a black tailored suit from head to toe, his dress shirt and slacks fitting him in all the right places, hinting at the masculine body underneath. I was enjoying my view of him when I felt his finger under my chin, slowly lifting it so my eyes would meet his.

  “I’m not with her.” His voice was like an expensive bourbon, filling my body with warmth and tingles. I barely comprehended what he’d said.

  Stunned, all I could spit out was, “What?”

  “The girl. We aren’t together… She’s only a family friend.”

  “Why are you telling me this? ...It’s none of my business, and you don’t owe me an explanation.” My voice was shaky as I spoke. I was afraid I already knew the answer to my question. It was not the answer I needed. I wanted it. I didn’t need it. I needed to stay as far away as possible. Nothing good could come of this. I knew that after what happened with Chris.

  “I know I don’t owe you an explanation,” he took a step closer, his voice more controlled than mine, “I wanted you to know.”

  “Why?”

  I was a masochist. Something was seriously wrong with me. It’s like the wall I had put up around my heart was slowly losing its strength, cracking due to the weight of Rhett’s stare. His face stretched into a slow smile, his firm body pressing gently into me, pushing me up against the closed door as he looked down into my eyes. My desire intensified.

  “I think you know why.”

  I did, damn it. His sexy voice had me wanting to strip him right there in the hallway. Before I could respond, I heard my name spoken by another voice I recognized.

  “Ava? Is everything okay here?”

  Stephen was standing in the hall with an angry, protective glare that told me he was ready to fight if I gave him the word. It seemed I’d been gone too long, and he had been sent to retrieve me.

  I pushed my body forward, Rhett willingly backing away but not too far. I could see the tension spread through his body as his fists clenche
d at his sides. Afraid both men were interpreting the situation wrong, I spoke before it got ugly.

  “Yes, I’m fine. I was just headed back.” I turned, walking away from Rhett to leave with Stephen when Rhett grabbed my elbow to stop me, his touch, igniting my body.

  “I’ll find you,” he promised in a voice low enough that only I could hear.

  I didn’t respond. Part of me hoped he would. Another part of me pleaded he wouldn’t. He released me. I glanced over my shoulder to look at stoic expression one more time as I left with Stephen.

  When we got to the kitchen, Stephen’s eyes were full of concern as we picked up our trays to return to our task.

  “Ava?” His voice stopped me.

  “I’m fine,” I smiled reassuringly, pushing through the swinging door, heading back into the great hall.

  The rest of the party my body felt energized from Rhett’s words. I could feel him watching me from across the room. I still kept my distance, afraid of losing my job.

  Rhett seemed to try his best to keep his distance from the blonde, yet she seemed to always reattach herself to his side, nurturing my contempt. Knowing he no longer belonged to her, only magnified my jealousy.

  The party died down around midnight with most of the guests leaving except for a few remaining stragglers. We were directed to make a sweep through the great hall, picking up any remaining empty glassware. I inconspicuously watched Rhett with his parents and some of the remaining guests on the veranda through the floor to ceiling windows that separated the great room from the outside, admiring the way he carried himself – relaxed and self-assured.

  He intrigued me, not only because he was attractive, but because of the way he seemed so self-possessed. I contemplated his age - he was young, though definitely older than me - guessing he was in his mid to late twenties.

  Amber walked up next to me, startling me out of my thoughts, “Enjoying the view?” She grinned. I blushed with embarrassment, turning my head back to the table full of empty glasses in front of me. She laughed, “I don’t blame you. He is gorgeous. I’m pretty sure he’s the guy from the pub that night. I had no idea he was a Blackwood at the time.”

  Not wanting to respond to her theories, I bumped her shoulder with mine and smiled, “Let’s get out of here and head to the beach.”

  She gave me a big smile, following my lead to leave.

  With only a few hours left in the Hamptons, none of us wanted to spend it sleeping. We decided to pull an all-nighter on the beach, watching the sunrise. When we arrived back at the hotel, the guys changed quickly before heading down to the beach to set up a bonfire. Amber and I changed into some warmer clothes, packing up some blankets and a bottle of wine we still had left over from the night before.

  Everyone relaxed around the fire, joking and laughing while reminiscing about the party and the famous people we saw. I was only half listening, continually glancing over my shoulder, watching for Rhett. Waiting.

  The words he parted on me seemed so demanding and final. He never said when, so I didn’t know when to expect him. Maybe that was what he wanted - me waiting in anticipation. He was already playing games with my head. I needed to end this before it started.

  “You look deep in thought,” Stephen took a seat next to me in the sand. He put his arm around me, pulling me closer to his side. I laid my head on him. “Want to tell me what’s going through that pretty little head of yours?”

  “Not really,” I stared at the fire without looking up at him. He didn’t press. He just kissed the top of my head and squeezed me tighter. I continued to watch the flames dancing around. I was entranced by their graceful movement. The smell of the fire, the sound of the waves, the wine and warm embrace of Stephen’s arms, making me feel safe. Content.

  “Just promise me you’ll be careful,” he interrupted our silence.

  Looking up at him, I smiled endeared by his protectiveness. “There’s nothing to worry about,” I assured him. And there wasn’t. Rhett Blackwood no longer existed in my mind.

  CHAPTER 6

  The rest of the week I buried myself in school and work. It was the only way I knew how to keep moving forward and put Saturday night behind me. The more time that went by with no contact from Rhett, the more confident I was in the choice I made to forget him. It just proved, had I let him, he would break me in the end.

  It wasn’t too hard to keep my mind pre-occupied. With only a few weeks left in the semester before Thanksgiving break, I was inundated with completing my final studio project and studying for final exams. I was looking forward to the spring semester. I knew I would be able to relax more since grades from the final semester of college didn’t count towards my GPA.

  For now, I focused on my grades and applying to graduate school. I didn’t know where I would end up. I was planning to apply to the top schools in the area - Harvard, Columbia, MIT, Yale, Cornell - but I also dreamt of maybe going across the country to California.

  Lizzie and I pow-wowed on the couch in our living room about what to do with our evening. We were done with our classes for the semester and we wanted to celebrate. It was the first Friday night I had off from work in months.

  “Let’s go dancing,” she exclaimed, “We can invite Stephen and Mike. And go to The Alley in Boston!” She looked so happy about her idea. I didn’t have the heart to tell her no, even if I wanted to.

  “Let’s do it!”

  “Seriously?” Her eyes widened with skepticism. “I don’t have to twist your arm or anything? …This is way too easy. What’s going on?”

  She had been really patient with me over the last few weeks. She knew my tendency to distract myself with school, work and whatever else I could to avoid whatever was weighing on me. She hadn’t pushed me this whole time. It was her first attempt to find out. I knew if I denied there was an issue, she would let me. But I wanted to tell her.

  “Do you remember that night I ran out of the pub?”

  “Yeah, you couldn’t get out of there fast enough.”

  “Well…,” I proceeded to tell her the whole embarrassing story about Rhett. From the moment at Brewed, to that intense moment in the Hamptons and the fact that I hadn’t seen him since.

  “Dickhead.” Was her first response when I finished. “He’s a sexy bastard, I’ll give him that, but definitely a dickhead,” she added. I couldn’t help but chuckle. “I think, tonight is definitely what you need. And I get to pick out what you’ll wear.” She paused for a moment as if in thought, “From my closet.”

  I rolled my eyes at her, shaking my head as she stood up, pulling me with her. I texted Stephen to make sure Mike and him were off work for the evening, asking if they wanted to join us. He responded immediately.

  S: Hell yeah!

  I smiled to myself, excited for a night out on the town with all my besties. It was just what I needed before leaving to go home for Thanksgiving.

  I jumped in the shower, letting the warm water massage away all the stress and pent up feelings I’d been carrying. It felt good to talk to Lizzie about everything. Even though Stephen had known the story, it was different having a girlfriend relate.

  I toweled off, covering myself with my robe. After drying and straightening my thick, brown hair, I took my time putting on my make-up. I applied a little more than usual, since we were going clubbing in Boston, choosing an eye-shadow that made my blue eyes pop. I finished adding an extra coat of mascara before strolling into Lizzie’s room to see what she had picked out for me, hoping it wasn’t too revealing.

  Lizzie was busy in her bathroom, getting ready for the night. I walked over to her bed where she had a dress draped across. It was a skin-tight, red dress with a plunging neckline and a back that did the same. Nervous that she would argue, I picked it up, turning it to her, “Lizzie, there is no way in hell you’re getting me to wear this.”

  She just laughed at me, looking at me through the mirror. “Ava, I know you better than that. You should see the fear on your face right now.” She walked
over snatching the dress from me. “This one is for me,” she winked.

  She opened her closet where on the inside of the door hung a black sleeveless cocktail dress with a scoop neck. It fit tighter than I normally would prefer, but it was modest compared to the first dress. I lifted the hanger from the door, turning it around to see the back. It was basically non-existent. I eyes widened in fear while she pushed me towards the door to go put it on.

  “I can’t even where a bra with this!” I exclaimed.

  “You don’t need one, you prude! Don’t look at me like that.” She put her hands on her hips. “There are cups sewn into the lining.”

  “Fine, I’ll put it on, but if I don’t like it, I’m wearing my own clothes.”

  “Just go change, Sister Ava. I’ll pray for forgiveness for you in the meantime,” she taunted me. I grabbed a pillow from her bed, throwing it at her as I walked out with the dress, her evil laughter echoing behind me.

  She was right. The dress looked good on me. I felt confident and sexy. I hated when she was right.

  “Well….what do you think?” She was waiting in my doorframe dressed, ready to go.

  I looked at myself one more tin in the mirror before turning, shrugging my shoulders flippantly as I held in my smile, “I have it on. Might as well wear it.” She rolled her eyes at me. I giggled.

  “I just wish we wore the same size shoe.” I dug through my closet, suddenly remembering buying a pair of stilettos my freshman year for clubbing. They were bright red peep toe pumps which I figured would go well with my black dress, adding a touch of color to my ensemble. Finding them, I slipped them on.

  I ran into my bathroom, rubbing off the lipstick I had on and reapplied with a bright red one I’d buried in my make-up drawer. I bought it on a whim awhile back and had never had the nerve to wear it. Tonight was as good as any. I walked out of the bathroom, finding Lizzie with the biggest smile plastered to her face.