[My Paper Heart 01.0] My Paper Heart

by Magan Vernon

"Since I was so painfully shy in high school, and since my mom and sister were in sororities in college, they thought I should rush. Of course the only reason any sorority even looked at me was because my mom and sisters were legacies." I took a deep breath.

  "And then along came Beau. He was treasurer of Alpha Mu, one of the biggest fraternities on campus, and after meeting me at a party he immediately dubbed me Legs. He decided that my long legs and blonde hair where something that was actually desirable, instead of something that belongs on PBS."

  A stray strand of hair poked in front of my face and I pushed it back.

  "So basically if I hadn't met Beau I would still be Big Bird, and instead of being the sorority ditz I would have just been another dumb blonde girl."

  "Wow." Britt breathed. "You actually are human after all."

  I laughed. It was the first time all day that I think I had.

  "Well, I guess I am if you say so. I guess I am just another broke human."

  "So, do you think Blaine is going to be anything like Beau?" God she was full of questions.

  "What do you mean?" I glanced at my blind spot before switching lanes then glancing back at Britt.

  "He kind of has that player reputation and so did Beau. Aren't you worried about that?"

  It was actually something I was very worried about. I didn't want to get hurt again like I was with Beau, and even though Blaine assured me over and over again that he was nothing like Beau and his playboy days were over, it was still always in the back of my mind.

  "No...I mean yes...I mean." I took a deep long sigh. "I mean I really don't know. I'm always worried about it no matter how many times he tells me he's over that."

  "Are you doing him?"

  "BRITTANY!"

  "Well it's an honest question." She laughed.

  "What's with all the questions anyways?" I spotted the exit for Elsbury up ahead and veered over into the right lane.

  "I just want to know. I mean we haven't really talked lately, and you know, just catching up."

  "Well if you really must know. No, no we haven't slept together."

  She leaned in closer. "Does that worry you?"

  I shook my head and tilted it to the side. "Why would that worry me?"

  "Do you think he could be getting it somewhere else? Or maybe he doesn't find you attractive or something?" Britt rattled off.

  "So I tell you that I get called Big Bird in high school and you go and tell me that my boyfriend won't sleep with me because he's cheating on me and thinks that I am ugly?" I was visibly upset now. My hands tightened on the steering wheel as I started speaking through clenched teeth.

  Maybe Britt was right. Maybe Blaine just wanted to get with the most interesting new thing in town and would dump me once I got old. I had hoped it wouldn't take me that long to figure it out.

  Chapter 12

  "Libby, you got mail!" Britt shouted from the living room.

  It had been two days since we went to New Orleans, and I couldn't get what Britt had said out of my head. I had avoided even seeing Blaine. It had been three days without seeing each other and I was wondering if by now he had found someone new.

  He would come to the office with lunch and I would tell him that I was too busy, or he would want to come over to Aunt Dee's after work and I would make up some excuse. I promised him I would still go over there for Sunday dinner and maybe then he would break up with me, or just keep me around as a trophy girlfriend.

  I put the last of the pillows on my new bedspread (black and red, no more bubblegum pink), and walked out to the living room. Brittany handed me a big white envelope with my name scribbled out in a fancy writing on the front. I opened it up to find another envelope reading 'Libby and guest.' It was Kristi's wedding invitation.

  "Guess what I got in the mail?" I teased, dialing Kristi as soon as I opened the invitation.

  "Oh Em Gee, you finally got it! I was started to think I had the wrong address!" Kristi squealed on the other end, for someone getting married she still talked like a teenage girl.

  "Yep, I couldn't let you be down a bridesmaid." I smiled. Britt rolled her eyes at me as she grabbed a cookie from the jar in the kitchen.

  "And are you bringing Mr. Louisiana with you? I think I have to approve of my little sister's new boyfriend!"

  I didn't even think about asking Blaine, okay the thought had crossed my mind a few times, but would he really want to go? Even if he did what would he think of me with all my friends? A bunch of Chicago girls in designer dresses talking about shoes and makeup? I was sure that he would love that. He'd probably love to meet Beau even more. I could just imagine how that one would go over.

  "I'll be sure to ask him." I beamed.

  What could it hurt? If he really did want to be with me, not Big Bird, not Legs, but Libby, then he would have to go to this wedding.

  "Well you know Beau has been asking a lot about you ever since you made it Facebook official with Mr. Louisiana." Kristi added.

  "Really? I honestly didn't think he would care. He was the one who cheated on me and broke it off." I honestly couldn't imagine Beau caring in the slightest. At first I wondered if Kristi had made it up, but then remembered her fiancé, Gabe, and Beau were frat brothers so they probably had talked about it.

  "It came up between him and Gabe one night."

  That didn't really give me much to go off of, so I pressed for more.

  "What did he say exactly?" I pushed.

  "Like, okay. We were hanging out at the lake and he was all, 'well it's kind of skanky or whatever for her to move on so quickly'. And I was just like whatever." You could hear Kristi chomping on her gum as she talked. It really made her seem like a teenager between all the chomping.

  "Well he doesn’t have any reason to be upset. He is the one that broke it off with me," I quipped.

  "I don't know. He's probably just jealous or whatever. But hey sweetie I gotta go! Say hi to Mr. Louisiana for me!" She hung up before I could even get a goodbye in, which was actually alright because my mom quickly buzzed in.

  "Hey Mom."

  That was a surprise. It was the first time that I had heard from her since I'd gotten to Louisiana. Well except for a few e-mails.

  "Okay, listen."

  "Hello and how are you, to you too."

  I heard my mom groan. "Libby I don't have much time and this is important."

  "Okay let's hear it."

  "So I got off of the phone with your advisor and he just informed me that you can file for an appeal to get back into school for the fall." My mother, the non-stop lawyer.

  "Well wouldn't that take a lot of work?" I twirled a strand of hair.

  "Libby, if you had put a lot of work into your schooling in the first place we wouldn't have this problem. Don't you want to go back to school?"

  It was something that was constantly on my mind. I knew I wouldn't have much of a future if I didn't go back and I knew it was what was best for me. I also never thought that I would actually be starting to enjoy Louisiana. On the other hand it wasn’t like Blaine was really giving me much of a reason to stay, and it would make Beau even more pissed off if I came back.

  "Alright Mom, what do I have to do?"

  Chapter 13

  I was never nervous on our first date, but I was sure as hell nervous to meet Blaine's family. I never actually met Beau's family, even on family weekend. He said I didn't have to, that it was too much of an inconvenience. Even though he met mine right away. I should have really listened to my sister when she said he was nothing more than a juiced-up dirt bag.

  "Can you zip me up?" I turned my back toward Britt.

  I decided to go with a sleeveless, violet baby doll dress. It wasn't anything too fancy since I definitely couldn't afford that. I also thought it looked okay to meet Blaine's parents.

  "Yeah, I guess." Her chubby little fingers struggled with the zipper as she slowly fastened the dress. Clearly I needed to do something before Kristi's wedding. I never gained weight in schoo
l and as Kristi told me earlier in the week, I may have to start praying to the porcelain god if I wanted the bridesmaid dress to fit.

  "Do I look alright?" I did a little twirl, holding my arms above my head.

  "Yeah, you do Libby, you really do." Britt couldn't look me in the eye. She just stared down at her feet.

  "Look Libby, I'm sorry for what I said about you and Blaine. I was really jealous, and well I thought if I started making you second guess your relationship. I don't know." She stopped and shifted her weight again. "I do think he really does like you Libby, and I’m sorry. I really am."

  I smiled and leaned down to kiss Britt's forehead. She cocked an eyebrow in response.

  "Britt, you're fine. I can understand how you felt and no matter what, you're my favorite little cousin."

  This girl needed some kind of a role model in her life. I knew Aunt Dee could do all the motherly stuff, while I could do the girly things.

  "So, you're not going to break up with Blaine and he'll start coming over again?"

  I cocked my head to the side. "You want Blaine to start coming over again? So you can watch us cuddle on the couch and watch Sports Center?"

  "Well, if I can't have him I at least need something good to look at!"

  We shared a laugh, an actual hard laugh.

  "Girls?" Aunt Dee knocked on my door frame and interrupted our laughter.

  I took a deep breath in trying to stop my laughter. "Yeah Aunt Dee?"

  She moved to the side and Blaine stepped out from the living room. There I was on the floor of my bedroom, holding my stomach from laughing with Britt lying down in front of me. Of course as soon as we saw Blaine we both quickly stood up.

  "Hey Blaine." I smoothed out my dress.

  "So this is what you do in the bedroom." He leaned his arm above his head on the door frame, and then tilted his whole body against it. "No wonder I’m not allowed in here."

  "Sorry, I thought you heard him." Aunt Dee was wringing her hands together, like she was trying to squeeze water out of them that would never come.

  "It's fine Aunt Dee." I smoothed the wrinkles out of my skirt and hopped over to Blaine. "So are you just going to make fun of me all night or are you taking me over to your parents?"

  ∞

  Blaine’s parent's house was only a few miles from Aunt Dee's, and even more off of the beaten path than I thought was possible. But his house was definitely like something out of a magazine.

  It was a cute, little, white Plantation style home, but definitely smaller. Like a Cape Cod with a big front porch, complete with a wooden porch swing. It wasn't anything like a grand Antebellum home that you would see in the movies, but it definitely had character. He pulled his truck over to the side of the house and turned off the engine.

  "Do you think they're actually going to like me?" I bit my lip, twirling my thumbs in my hand.

  "Do you think you're going to stop ignoring me like you have been?"

  I abruptly turned my head toward him. "What?"

  "Libby, you've been ignoring me for days now, with the lamest excuses. Headaches, Jeopardy, and I just want to know what's going on." He cupped my face in his hands and pulled me closer to him.

  "If you are going to break up with me, please just tell me now, so I don't have to introduce you to my parents. Then have my crazy sister, Meg, try and put a curse on you or something."

  I giggled, but he looked at me with eyes of steel. "I’m serious, Libby."

  "Well, are you breaking up with me?" I cocked my head, as much as I could with it being in his hands.

  "What? Libby why would you even think that?" He put his hands down and unbuckled his seatbelt. "You know I'm crazy about you."

  "Yeah, but how many other girls have you told that to? I mean, UGH." I slumped down in my seat and put my head in my hands. "I don’t know what to think! I think I probably think too much."

  "Libby." He pulled me, by the waist, close to him and slanted my chin up toward him. "Look, I care about you, and just stop thinking about your ex. I'm not like him. The past is all you have with him, and the past is the past the future is now."

  I grinned. "Did you just quote Christopher Walken?"

  "Yes. Yes I did. Does it do anything for you?" He pressed his forehead against mine.

  "Oh yeah." I leaned in and kissed him lightly on the lips, and then he pulled me closer into a full blown tongue-in-cheek kiss.

  But before we could get too into it I heard a rap on the window. I jumped almost across the seat after looking out to see a little pigtailed girl staring back at me.

  "Uncle Blaine's eatin' da blonde lady!" The little girl squealed. A pair of bronzed arms pulled her off of the hood of the truck.

  Blaine threw open the truck and grabbed the pigtailed girl. "Abby Cadabby!" he screamed, throwing her up in the air as she squealed.

  "We were wondering where y'all was at!" The bronzed woman said. She threw her arms around Blaine and the little girl.

  "You may be sittin' outside suckin face with your girlfriend, but that ain't gonna stop you from giving your sister a hug." She had one of the thickest southern accents that I had ever heard. I felt like that was my cue to get out of the truck. I slowly opened the door and saw a freckle-faced little boy staring up at me.

  "Um...hi…" I waved down at the little boy.

  His response was just to shriek loudly. Blaine and his sister ran over with the little girl in tow. Blaine's sister knelt down in front of the little boy.

  "Shh, Braiden it's okay." She ran her hands through his hair and stroked his cheek. Her bright blonde hair fell in a mess all over her face as she wiped the boy's runny nose.

  "What'd you do to him, Libby?" Blaine nudged my elbow, the little girl was still in his arms.

  "I didn't do anything." My face heated up. I bit my bottom lip, unsure of what to do next.

  "Oh, I'm kidding with you, Libby." Blaine put an arm around me and kissed my forehead.

  "Ew, gross Uncle Blaine!" The little girl shrieked. I realized she was in a big pink tutu and had a sparkly purple tiara on top of those brown pigtails.

  "Libby, meet my niece Abby." He held the little girl up in the air as she giggled. "And the little boy that you scared is Braiden. And this is my sister Meg," he exclaimed as Meg picked up Braiden and stood up, looking me up and down.

  "So you're the girl that finally nailed down my brother." She had an aura about her that could scare the crap out of you. I knew she could probably toss me around without me having known what hit me.

  "Um." I looked over at Blaine for some back up and he just shrugged. I looked back at Meg. "I guess."

  She threw her arms around me and embraced me in a big hug, all the while Braiden was still in one arm.

  When she let go she just looked at me. "Any girl who could rope my brother in a relationship is a good girl in my book."

  I smiled weakly as she let go of me.

  "Now come on, let's get you two in the house so you can meet the rest of the zoo." That syrupy thick accent flew out of Meg's lips.

  I grabbed a pie that Aunt Dee had made and carried it in the house with us. I firmly believed that no matter where you were going, if you were invited over to someone's house you should always bring something. And since my mom was an attorney, she didn't cook, it was usually wine or catered by the grocery store bakery. But I thought it would be better if Aunt Dee made one of her pecan pies than me bringing something from the grocery store.

  A short stocky woman in an apron with bright blonde hair (what was with these Crabtrees and their hair?) stepped out onto the porch as we approached it.

  "Grandma!" Abby squealed as she jumped out of Blaine's arms. She ran up to the lady and pulled on the bottom of her shorts. "We found Blaine. He was eatin dat girl's face in his twuck!" Abby exclaimed proudly.

  "Is that so?" The woman cooed in a thick southern accent. She looked down at Abby then at Blaine and me. "So, this is why we were waiting on you for dinner!"

  I bit my bottom li
p as Blaine put an arm around me, edging me toward the front porch. "Ma, this is my girlfriend Libby, and Libby this is my mom, Vicki."

  I thrusted the pie out toward Vicki, not even looking up and blurted, "My Aunt Dee made pie."

  Meg and Vicki shared a loud laugh. It was almost melodious with their thick country accents.

  "Why, aren't you just a peach?" Vicki exclaimed as she took the pie. "Your Aunt Dee makes the best pecan pie in three Parishes."

  I nodded, looking up at Blaine for reassurance. He kissed my forehead and looked down at me.

  "Come on, let's get inside."

  We entered into a small foyer with a little fireplace directly in front of us and a large picture of the family, from when Blaine had to be about ten, stood directly facing me. Off to the side I could hear men screaming. They were around a TV that couldn't have been more than 30 inches, and the three men were crowded around it sitting on worn out floral print couches.

  "Boys!" Vicki shouted with determination.

  "Oh man is that the LSU game?" Blaine peered over my shoulder.

  "Yeah, they're going into extra innings!" A younger looking man with a trucker cap and a five o’clock shadow glanced over at us, then went straight back to looking at the TV. I figured he must have been Braiden's dad the way that Braiden ran over to him.

  I was starting to think this time I was the one that was overdressed. Besides Abby's tutu, everyone else was in shorts and t-shirts. I wanted to make a good impression, but this time I was starting to feel a little self-conscious.

  "Arthur." Vicki bellowed.

  "What is it, Vicki?" A man looking to be about in his mid-forties with thick brown curly hair, that held specks of gray, and a Colonel Mustard mustache looked over at us. He was about to turn back toward the TV, but then he got up when he realized I was standing there.

  "Oh, pardon me." He stood up and slowly walked over to us. He had a voice that sounded almost like John Wayne. "I'm Blaine's dad, Arthur." He extended his hand out to me and I shook it weakly.

  The man with the trucker hat came darting behind Blaine's dad, and a shorter tanned guy with jet-black hair and a baby face came in flying behind him.