Breaking Badger

by Shelly Laurenston

  “Which brother?” Max asked.

  “Jacob.”

  “Oh, I like Uncle Jacob.”

  “I’ll tell ya what. I’ll text him. Give him a heads-up you guys need to talk to him. Now I don’t know exactly where he is and he probably won’t tell me. I think he may be on a . . . ya know . . . job.”

  “Right,” Max said, knowing that among badgers the word “job” could mean a myriad of things.

  “Once he knows you need to talk to him, he’ll let you know where he is.”

  “Thanks, Uncle Carl. That’s really helpful.”

  Carl shrugged. “Honestly, sweetie, I’m just glad you’re not here to kill me for the insurance money.”

  Max glanced at Keane before asking her uncle, “Is that becoming a common thing in our family? Because I feel like it’s something I should be informed about.”

  * * *

  Mads was shooting baskets in Charlie’s backyard when Max and Keane returned from their meeting with Max’s uncle.

  “How did it go?” Charlie asked, handing plastic baggies filled with dark chocolate brownies out to the bears patiently waiting on the other side of the fence. The bears had originally been in the yard, but Finn and Shay began roaring at their presence when the first batch of brownies came out and there was a small scuffle that could easily have turned into a big scuffle. Mads became worried when Stevie scrambled up a tree, hiding in the leaves like a baby bear. Charlie had tried to calm everyone by telling them there were more brownies on the way, but no one was listening . . . until Streep had pulled out the scorpions.

  “You guys don’t want scorpions?” she’d asked, holding up a big, shiny black one. “They are soooo yummy! And putting up quite a fight. This one has stung me about six times!”

  That’s when the bears scrambled over the nearby fence while Finn and Shay jumped into the pool.

  “What?” Streep asked the bears. “You really don’t want one? The poison gives it a nice little zip. Especially with the crunch!”

  It always helped that none of the locals knew anything about scorpions and snakes. The really poisonous ones had to be secretly brought into the country and badgers would often build whole dinners around the event, pairing excellent wines and tequilas with the specific kind of scorpion they would be enjoying that night.

  Honestly, these big black ones might as well be wine in a can as far as the badger community was concerned.

  “We found out nothing,” Keane announced.

  “Not exactly true,” Max quickly cut in. “Uncle Carl didn’t have much to tell us. But he passed us on to his brother. I’m just waiting for a text from him. Hopefully he’ll have more info.”

  “Any info.”

  “I warned you it would be like this,” Max reminded Keane. “That we might have to talk to more than one badger. That we might have to travel a little bit. Especially since no one else has had any information about your father in all these years. You just have to be patient.” The cats all stared at her. Even Finn and Shay, who were still floating in the pool in their jeans, T-shirts, and boots. “I know. As soon as that came out of my mouth, I knew it was a stupid thing to say.”

  Max turned away and walked toward the house.

  “Where are you going?” Nelle asked.

  “I have to pee.”

  Keane closed his eyes. “She couldn’t just say I’m going to the bathroom?”

  No one replied because they all knew the answer.

  “Don’t feel discouraged,” Mads told Keane. She thought about patting him on the shoulder, but she didn’t feel like reaching up that high. “There are no straight lines when it comes to badgers.”

  “She’s right,” Nelle said, stepping back as Finn and Keane got out of the pool so she wouldn’t get the chlorinated water on her shoes. “And you guys should get a bag together with a change of clothes. You’ll probably have to travel.” She looked off for a moment, then added, “You know what? I’ll see if my father will loan us one of his planes.”

  She began to tap on her phone.

  “Your father has so many planes he can just . . .loan us one?”

  Nelle glanced up at Keane, and chirped, “Uh-huh.”

  “You going to come with us, too?” Finn asked Mads.

  “Until practice starts for the championships . . . okay.”

  “Seriously?” he demanded. “The championship is more important than—”

  “Yes!” she replied before Finn could even finish. What surprised her was that all her teammates joined in at the same time. Because they had no delusions about her loyalties either.

  Finn grabbed her around the waist and hugged Mads close, which she normally wouldn’t mind except that he was soaking wet from the pool. Laughing, she halfheartedly tried to push him off. Neither stopped until Max ran out of the house.

  “He texted me back!” she cheered. “I heard from Uncle Jacob! He said he’ll meet with us.” She stopped in front of the group and grinned.

  In fact, Max stood there and grinned for so long that Keane finally barked, “When?”

  “Don’t yell at me!”

  “That was not yelling. You’ll know when I’m yelling.”

  “Daddy says we can use any jet that’s available,” Nelle said, smiling. “And there are an array. Would you like me to list them?”

  “How rich are you?” Shay asked.

  “Very,” she replied, not missing a beat.

  Staring at her phone, Max asked, “Any that can do, well . . . long distances?”

  “Yes.” Nelle raised a brow. “Why?”

  She cleared her throat. “Uncle Jacob is not exactly around the corner.” Keane growled and Max immediately became defensive. “It’s not my fault!”

  Nelle placed her hand on Keane’s arm. “Everyone calm down,” she ordered, using her best soothing voice so that you never really knew it was an order. “Instead of making this a chore, we’re going to make this fun. Together. We’ll take one of Daddy’s best jets, we’ll go meet with Max’s uncle, get what information we can, and then we’ll go someplace fabulous for dinner. Like Paris. Or Rome. We’ll be back before you know it!” She looked over at Charlie, who was still handing out brownies. “Charlie, do you think you and Stevie want to go?”

  “Not me, sweetie. I think I still have a warrant out in Paris I haven’t dealt with. Stevie? You want to go with—”

  “No, thank you,” came from one of the trees. “I am currently attempting to manage a new and hopefully short-lived irrational fear of flying—you know, because of climate change? I fear sudden and brutal storms whipping up that will cause damage to the engines, and all the passengers plummeting to untimely deaths. As well as my more rational fear of terrorism in this current political climate.”

  When only silence followed that statement, the tree shook a little, and Stevie’s small head popped out from the leaves. “Not that you guys have anything to worry about,” she immediately backpedaled. “You guys will be fine. I’m . . . I’m . . . sure. Absolutely fine.”

  With still no reply, she cringed and ducked back into the solace of the tree.

  “Anyway,” Nelle continued, “everyone should go pack one overnight bag and meet me at the airport. I am this very moment texting you the address.” She looked up at Keane. “And stop looking so angry. I promise! This will be fun, fun, fun!”

  * * *

  “Is this really fun, fun, fun to you?” Keane bellowed before diving behind the remains of a blown-out building.

  “If you ask me that again,” Nelle yelled back, firing the submachine gun that had already been packed onto the private jet she’d borrowed from her father, “I will kill you myself!”

  Finn wasn’t sure how they’d actually ended up here, but here they certainly were. In the middle of a goddamn war. Not a known war. Not the kind of war you’d see on the nightly news while sitting down for dinner. This was some Eastern European thing that was sneaky and illegal and involved backhanded government deals that every government involved w
ould deny later.

  And Max’s Uncle Jacob was right in the middle of it. He apparently was a mercenary. That was the “job” his family meant.

  Finn heard screams and saw women and children trying to run away from a group of armed men attempting to chase them down. Finn looked at his brothers and they shifted.

  * * *

  Mads landed hard on the ground, her machine gun knocked from her hands. A full-human male grabbed her leg, dragging her close. She kicked him in the face, breaking his jaw. He stumbled back and she lifted her leg so she could grab a blade from her holster. Mads flipped forward and plunged the blade into the man’s chest, but immediately had to yank it out again because another man was coming at her. She was still low to the ground, so she cut his inner thighs, turned back to the man she’d stabbed in the chest, and cut his throat. Returned to the man standing and cut him low across the belly.

  As his insides fell onto the floor, she ran back to her gun and grabbed it up just as the door to the small house she’d run to was kicked in. She opened fire and dashed over the bodies in time to see three massive tigers take down armed men so that women and children could make a desperate run for safety.

  “This way!” Mads yelled out in very bad Russian, motioning with her hand. She knew the people she was yelling at weren’t Russian but it was the best she could do, and she hoped they understood enough. If nothing else, they seemed to grasp her gestures. Tock then used her skills with explosives to clear space behind them.

  When the dust settled, they heard Max shout, “Here! Over here!”

  The team ran toward her and Mads whistled for the big cats. To her surprise, Finn spun and faced her. He bumped his brothers and they followed her as she ran to Max.

  Inside a dilapidated office building, they found Uncle Jacob. He was tall for a badger, a true soldier. He kept firing out a broken window while casually conversing with Max and Keane.

  “I remember your father! Quite a cat. Big bastard! Mean! But knew how to get the job done! Can’t say I know who killed him. No one would talk about it! You. Bomb girl. Blast those boys over there, would you? Thanks, dear girl. Anyway, you know who might have more info . . . your Uncle Billy, Max! He was in Prague last I heard! Try him!”

  * * *

  “Exactly how many uncles do you have?” Keane asked as the private jet made its way to Prague.

  “More than I thought,” Max admitted.

  “Sure you guys don’t want to choose something from the Zhao family plane armory?” Tock asked, gesturing to the gun display. It had been hidden behind a panel, and it was not the only one. Apparently most of the family’s jets had them.

  The brothers politely declined. They knew how to use guns but such weapons always seemed excessive when they already had claws, fangs, and, when they shifted, nearly a thousand pounds. Finn didn’t hold it against the badgers for adding weapons to their fangs and claws, though. Not that they necessarily needed any enhancement. He’d watched them fight earlier. When they lost a weapon or ran out of bullets, they moved to hand-to-hand combat with ease and they kicked ass. He was guessing that it was a form of krav maga that Tock had taught them, modified to take advantage of their badger rage and willingness to strip off an enemy’s skin at a moment’s notice.

  “We’re not going into another war, are we?” Shay asked, staring out the plane window. “I am not in the mood for another firefight. That’s the second one I’ve been in, in . . . like . . . three days. I might get PTSD. I may have to get a support animal.”

  “You are not getting any more dogs!” Keane snarled.

  “Of course not!” He scratched his neck. “But I heard goats are good.”

  “You get a goat, I’m eating it,” Finn warned. “While it’s alive and screaming.”

  “You sick fuck—”

  “It’s not a war zone,” Max promised, probably thinking of her younger sister’s words and not wanting two tigers to get into a fierce battle on a plane that could suddenly go down. Sure, as badgers they might survive a crash . . . but they also might not. “I never knew my Uncle Jacob that well. But my Uncle Billy is definitely not a soldier, and he’s not going to be fighting for anyone.”

  “So we’ll be in and out?” Keane asked.

  “In and out!”

  * * *

  “Thirty seconds!” Billy Yang yelled, moving from case to case and smashing each one with a crowbar. “Go! Go! Go!”

  Mads refused to get involved, so she stood by Finn and his brothers, waiting while Max yelled questions at her uncle and her teammates . . . “helped” Billy’s associates.

  Streep and Max handled the watches. Nelle and Tock, the diamond necklaces and bracelets.

  “Twenty seconds!”

  “Do you know anything?” Max asked Billy again.

  “Um? Yeah! Bosnia.”

  Mads felt Finn’s entire body tighten beside her and all three brothers straightened up.

  “What about Bosnia?” Max asked. “Was he in the war there?”

  “No. Not at all. Ten seconds! Wrap it up! He was there for something else! I don’t know what! Maybe Larry knows! All right, team! We are out!”

  * * *

  Wearing a five-million-dollar-diamond necklace, two-thousand-dollar shoes, as well as designer sunglasses and dress, Nelle strutted through the art museum that was housed inside an old castle. She had a fur stole wrapped around her shoulders and yelled at everyone in Cantonese while the rest of them followed her in black suits and dark sunglasses.

  It was a brilliant performance Nelle was putting on, but at this point Finn wasn’t surprised by anything she might do. She’d managed to steal the necklace she was wearing from the Prague jewelry store’s safe while Max’s Uncle Billy and his team smashed the shop’s cases and grabbed its mid-level wares. She’d also come out with several diamond-encrusted watches and rose gold bracelets she knew her mother would like. How and when she’d gotten into that safe, Finn had no idea. He just knew he was impressed.

  While Nelle loudly interrupted what turned out to be an auction of works by the Swedish artist Carl Larsson, demanding to purchase a piece that had already been sold to a local billionaire, Max’s Uncle Larry was in the museum’s basement switching a recently loaned Monet out with a recently forged copy.

  “Niece!” he greeted, when he saw Max. “You’re not here to kill me for the insurance, are you?”

  “No! How common is this with you guys?”

  Laughing, he hugged Max. “What are you doing here? Hoping to get your own Monet, are you?”

  “No. We are not here to stay. Just to see you. Very quickly. Super quickly.”

  “About what?”

  She filled him in on why they’d flown to Sweden and the badger frowned. “Why did Billy send you to me?”

  “You don’t know anything?”

  “Honey, I don’t have to. Your Uncle Russ knew him. Sent flowers to his funeral and directly to the widow. I know he actually looked into what happened.”

  Feeling as if his heart had stopped in his chest, Finn turned to look at his brothers.

  “Are you sure?” Max pushed. “Russ knew him?”

  “Positive. He was really upset. But you know Russ. Ma always said he had that weak gene.”

  “You mean sympathy?”

  “And the other one.”

  “Empathy?”

  “Yeah. That one, too. But Russ is definitely the one you should talk to.” Larry shook his head. “I do not know why those boneheads didn’t send you right to him.”

  “Because both sides of my family are full of idiots?”

  “Pretty much.”

  “So any chance Uncle Russ is in Norway or Iceland or Valhalla? Or anywhere within a thousand-mile radius of where we are currently standing?”

  Max’s Uncle Larry cringed and Finn already knew the answer was a solid “No.”

  “Last I heard,” the older badger said, “he was in the Congo, protecting gorillas from poachers.”

  “Africa?” Max deman
ded, her voice breaking a little. “He’s in Africa?”

  “Even from here, that’s not a short trip,” Keane muttered.

  “Can we just call him there?” Max practically begged. “I mean, even if I felt like being in a jet for twelve to fourteen hours, my friends and I have some . . . lingering issues involving a few African countries. What?” she demanded when Finn and his brothers stared at her.

  “You think we’re paranoid?” Larry asked, looking at his cell. “Russ will never tell you anything over the phone. Now, let’s see. I’m looking at the last few texts with the family. Blah, blah, blah. About the gorillas. How amazing they are. Yeah, it looks like he is definitely in the Congo, fighting poachers”—he glanced up and added—“which I think we all know means wiping them from the planet. Okay. I think I have his exact location coordinates right here and . . . oh!” He lowered his cell. “Russ is in Brooklyn now.”

  “Sorry?”

  “Yeah. Got a little confused. Forgot he came back from the Congo about a month ago.”

  “And none of your brothers knew that?”

  “I’m not sure they cared enough to remember. You know . . .”

  “The sympathy gene again?”

  Larry shrugged. “Yeah.”

  * * *

  “Don’t go anywhere,” Max said into the phone. “Understand? Just stay there until we come to talk to you.” Suddenly Max’s fangs unleashed. “I am not coming there to kill you for the insurance money! Just do as I say and stay in New York! Okay, fine. Even better. We’ll meet you at your job. That’s perfect.”

  She disconnected the call and was about to throw her phone when Streep snatched it out of her hands. The last thing they needed was for her to lose their connection with her family.

  “Is your mother planning to kill all her brothers?” Tock asked as one flight-crew member poured wine and another put out cheese and cracker plates with sides of honey.

  “Dude . . . I honestly don’t know. I don’t know what she’s doing. But clearly they are all worried.”

  “But if she asked you . . . ?”

  “No, Streep, I would not kill my family for my mother. And the fact that I have actively attempted to kill my father several times does not count because that had nothing to do with my mother. I did that on my own. I also need to add there was no money to get when it came to my attempts to kill my father. Because he is a useless, worthless man.”