Out of the Storm

by Avery Gale

  They’d explained topping from the bottom to her earlier in the week and she hadn’t really ever figured it would apply to her, but now it was crystal clear that was exactly what she had been trying to do. By attempting to figure out the best way to control the situation, she was indeed trying to take charge.

  “Kitten, I can tell by the look on your face that you’ve just had an ‘aha’ moment.” Kyle’s voice gave away the fact he wasn’t angry with her and she let out the breath she hadn’t even realized she was holding. “Now, even though we had something else entirely planned for you in the main room in a few minutes, we now have to address the issue of your misbehavior earlier this evening. Unfortunately you decided to act out in front of several of the club’s strictest members and I don’t doubt for a minute they are up there waiting to see if we are going to follow through and punish you in a way they will find suitable.”

  It was dim in the area where they were standing, but Tobi didn’t have any trouble interpreting the expression on Kyle and Kent’s’ faces. She’d backed them into a corner and they were now stuck in a classic lose-lose situation. Suddenly her trepidation shifted from worry about what they would do to her to feeling horrible for letting them down. “I’m really sorry I’ve put you in this situation. I didn’t think about the consequences for you or myself. I’ve let you both down and that is the part that bothers me the most. Do whatever you need to do to save face with your members and I’ll just accept it with as much grace and dignity as I can.” She didn’t even realize she’d dropped her gaze to the ground until Kent used his fingers to lift her chin.

  He studied her face for several minutes before nodding to his brother. “Let’s get this done. I don’t like it hanging over any of our heads.” When they reached the back door of the club Kent stopped her when she was a step above him and turned her so they were almost eye to eye. “Tobi, do you trust us?”

  “Yes, Sir. I trust you both.” She had tried to sound strong but she knew her words had sounded shaky, but at least they’d been completely sincere.

  “That’s all we’re asking for. Trust us, no matter what you see or hear when we go into the club keep your head down and don’t respond to anyone but one of your Masters, clear?” When she nodded, he pulled her forward and kissed her hard. Tobi assumed she’d pushed his control to the very edge and he was setting the tone for what was to come, but the longer he kissed her the more she decided it had been about something else entirely. He was trying to tell her how important she was and he was trying to drive the message in before they stepped through the door and everything changed.

  Kyle pulled her close and kissed her with the same fervor, but there was a bit more desperation in his. Her eyes filled with tears and when Kyle felt them against his cheek he pulled back and raised a brown in question. “Kitten?”

  “I just want to get this over with because then maybe you can forgive me for messing up so badly or at least I can start trying to regain the ground I’ve lost with you this evening.”

  He smiled and kissed her tear-streaked cheeks and then pulled her along behind him, “Come on. The sooner this is over the happier we will all be.”

  ****

  Kyle didn’t remember a time he’d been more reluctant to do something he knew was necessary and right. He and Kent were caught in that proverbial spot between a rock and a hard place. If they didn’t punish Tobi for her behavior they’d destroy the trust of every member of their club because the word would spread quickly to every member whether or not they were here tonight. It was also important that Tobi knew their word was golden and something she could always depend on, and they had explained the rules to her a couple of times during the previous week so she knew her actions had consequences. Sighing to himself as they stripped her and bound her to the St. Andrew’s cross, Kyle sent up a silent prayer they weren’t making a huge mistake.

  The small stage had a backdrop that was a series of faceted mirrored tiles and he caught the terrified look in her eyes as she watched the crowd gathering around them. What she didn’t know was that most of the people watching were likely more curious because he and Kent never played in this room than they were about seeing her punishment. The fact they had secured her in such a public location was going to attract a lot of attention even if the crowd didn’t all know what had happened earlier. Stepping over to the cabinet where supplies were kept, he picked up the black silk scarf and stepped in front of her. “Kitten, I’m going to blindfold you because you are going to get yourself in more trouble by meeting the gazes of those watching. Close your eyes, baby.”

  After he’d tied the cloth over her eyes he saw her muscles relax fractionally and barely heard her whispered “thank you” before he stepped away. He stepped back and kissed the end of her nose before moving up to the edge of the stage.

  “Some of you may have been witness to our sub’s misbehavior earlier this evening. My brother and I intend to deal with that misbehavior now. But before we do that, I’d like to remind you that everyone makes mistakes and I want you to know that Tobi’s only mistake was caring more about getting to her injured friend than about the consequences she is now facing for her behavior.” Several Doms and subs had been listening with almost gleeful expressions and he was pleased to see several of those smiles dim at his explanation.

  Kent had stepped in front of Tobi and placed his palm over her cheek. “What is your safe word, Tobi?”

  “It’s red, Sir.”

  “And when are you supposed to use it?” Kyle could hear the strain in Kent’s voice and knew they had to get this over with quickly for all their sakes.

  “If the pain is so unbearable that I can’t take it anymore or if I can’t take things emotionally any longer, Sir.” Kyle heard the catch in her words and knew she was already starting to come apart so he needed to get her mind refocused quickly.

  The first swat with the paddle hadn’t been hard enough to really be painful, but it certainly would have surprised her and as her yelp confirmed. “Don’t tense your muscles or it will just hurt more.” Kyle was sure Kent’s words were lost on her and she certainly would have felt pain from the second swat. Kyle had chosen a broad paddle to warm her up because it looked wicked but actually spread the impact over the entire surface so the pain was much lower than it looked or sounded like it would be.

  He continued swatting her until her ass cheeks were both bright red and hot to the touch. Even though he knew by the shuddering of her shoulders that she was crying, she hadn’t made a sound after the first swat. He hated how she was holding the emotion inside, and he was even more worried about why she was doing it. Newbie subs often thought they were making their Dom proud if they held everything in when in fact the opposite was actually more accurate. He wanted her to understand that grace and dignity during a punishment are about learning the lesson and accepting the punishment. She didn’t have to be silent to learn, hell, she actually hadn’t even needed the paddling to learn because she had already known what she’d done wrong. Her guilt wasn’t about her actions per se, but rather it stemmed from the fact she wanted to please them and knew she hadn’t. It was that desire to please that was at the very heart of submission. They had already witnessed her stoic response to a punishment and Kyle worried that not exploring the reaction was about to come back and bite them in the ass in a very big way.

  Kyle wished Tobi had more experience so she’d understand that Doms wanted subs to give them everything and that meant both the good and the bad. Submission is about handing everything that you are over to a person you trust enough to catch you when you fall. In his opinion, a Dom’s job is to coach and guide the sub so they can reach a place where they feel secure enough to be themselves. That security is only attainable when the submissive knows clear to their soul there will be someone behind them no matter what. Sure he and Kent knew plenty of Dominants who got off on the power they wielded over their submissive, but that wasn’t what it was about for them.

  Kent had been standing off
to the side warming up his arm and had timed his practice lashes with Kyle’s swats so Tobi hadn’t been alarmed by the sound of the single-tailed whip cracking. Kyle set the paddle aside and moved over to stand in front of Tobi. He took her tear-stained cheeks in his hands and pushed the blindfold up so he could look into her eyes and more accurately gauge her responses. His body was large enough that he was blocking her view of Kent and the crowd that was now almost ready to cheer at the thought of Tobi being whipped for their viewing pleasure. Kyle was literally almost physically ill at the thought of what they were about to do. He hoped like hell Kent pulled the lashes because he wasn’t sure Tobi was ready for that level of pain. When he’d run his fingers through her sex he’d found she wasn’t wet at all and that concerned him because it indicated that her body was only processing the sensations as pain and even though it was supposed to be a punishment, he had hoped to give her a release before they finished the scene.

  “Kitten, do you want to use your safe word?” Kyle watched as she blinked several times as if she were trying to process his words, but he knew from experience she wasn’t anywhere close to subspace. “Tobi? Did you hear the question?”

  “Yes, I heard the question, Sir. But, aren’t you finished? Oh God, is there more?” The bleak tone of her voice tore at his heart and he nearly called off the scene at that point. The expression on his face must have alerted Kent there was a problem because he dropped the whip and was at her side in an instant.

  Kyle looked at her for long seconds before answering, “No, that wasn’t all. You are supposed to get three lashes with the single tail whip but I’m not sure you can take that now.”

  She started shaking from her core and suddenly her entire body was being racked by nearly silent sobs. He could barely make out the words she was whispering, “No, no, I can’t do this again. I don’t ever want to do this again. It’s just like it always was, a big piece of wood hitting me over and over and over. Please just get it over with now because I won’t ever walk in this room again without remembering what has happened here tonight.” Tobi’s eyes were glazed, her pupils constricted and their movements frantic in a way Kyle had never seen before. He knew her father had used a lot of corporal punishment after her mother had died, but he hadn’t known he’d used a wooden paddle. Christ, how irresponsible could they have been? They hadn’t even discussed the punishment with her in advance and that might have given them a heads up to the trip wire they’d just stumbled into.

  Kyle was quickly unbuckling her and when he looked up at Kent, he simply flashed the sign for “doc” and watched his brother pivot and move quickly off the stage. By the time Kyle had finished unbuckling Tobi, Regi was already at his side holding open one of the club’s soft blankets. He nodded his thanks and wrapped it around Tobi just as she collapsed into his arms. Kyle was worried, and starting to become increasingly alarmed because Tobi’s eyes were wide open but he knew she wasn’t seeing a thing, and her total silence was absolutely haunting. After her initial sobbing and words, it seemed like she had just completely shut down emotionally. He fought back the anger he felt at his own arrogance and he wished like hell he’d listened to his gut feelings earlier and called this whole cluster fuck off.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Kent sat in the small chair he positioned in the shadows of the master suite’s bedroom and just watched Tobi as she slept alone in the enormous bed they’d shared with her so many times over the past week. After they’d rubbed anesthetic cream into her battered behind, he and Kyle settled her in the bed they’d hoped to share with her for the rest of their lives. Right now, he didn’t hold out much hope they were going to be granted that opportunity. He and Kyle were both terrified they’d broken something in her during their scene last night and neither of them was convinced they hadn’t damaged a part of her soul they would never be able to heal. How had they been so presumptuous? How had they missed all the signs? How had they ignored all their own teaching and failed to ask questions that were critical, particularly when they had already known bits and pieces of her background? How had they managed to put their own reputations as Doms and the owners of the club above the needs of the woman they had both fallen in love with?

  He was grateful that both Brian Bennett and Kirk Evans had both still been in the club and had come up to the apartment to evaluate Tobi’s condition. She had been virtually catatonic and both physicians had agreed that she’d had some kind of psychotic break and hadn’t hesitated to sedate her. Kyle had called Jax to see if Gracie would answer a few questions about Tobi’s background, and when he had relayed what had happened all Kyle heard was Jax’s cursing before he snapped “on our way” and disconnected the phone. Kent had gone down to meet them and Gracie had practically crawled up his ass during the short ride upstairs in the small elevator. Damn, Jax and Micah were going to have to be careful with that one or she might end up turning the tables on them.

  Kyle had been reluctant to leave Tobi’s side, but Brian agreed to sit with her while the rest of them talked quietly in the kitchen. Gracie’s voice was raspy and strained from her injuries, but she managed to explain the only reason she knew the details of Tobi’s childhood was the two of them had shared a couple of bottles of cheap wine one night, and Tobi had finally opened up. Gracie told them Tobi had recounted how her dad had often used her pantyhose to tie her to large nails in the wall and then he would beat her with a wide piece of unfinished wood until he ran out of steam or she passed out. By the time Gracie had finished she’d been crying for her friend and weaving on her feet. Jax had explained how they had given her painkillers earlier as he’d picked her up and cuddled her against his chest before handing her off to Micah.

  “Baby, you need to rest.” Micah’s words were soft and Kent had watched as the two men cared for Gracie and he hoped like hell they learned from the mistakes he and Kyle had made with Tobi. Micah turned to him and said, “We’re going to take her back to our cabin so we can make sure she rests. I’m worried about her staying alone after she’s taken the pain meds. Obviously they are hitting her pretty hard.” Kent and Kyle both thanked Gracie for her help and kissed her on the forehead before bidding their friends good night before returning to Tobi.

  Kirk had listened to Gracie’s story and he’d encouraged them to remember how strong Tobi must be to have survived so much trauma. “Don’t give up on what you want this relationship to be. Tobi is smart and obviously very resilient. Give her time to heal, but don’t let her forget how important she is to you both.” After they’d gone back in the bedroom to check on her, both Brian and Kirk assured them that she would sleep for several more hours. They promised to return later the next morning with more meds and to check on Tobi after she was awake.

  Before the two men left, Brian gripped his arm and spoke quietly, “This doesn’t have to break her you know. It may force her to confront some issues from her past that she’d rather leave buried, but she could well end up stronger in the end as a result of this. Don’t assume the worst. The best healing balms in the world are compassion and patience.” Kent had nodded his understanding and watched as their friends made their way out of the bedroom. Kent really hoped that Regi gave the two doctors a chance because he truly believed they were exactly what their resident tigress needed.

  Settling back into his chair, Kent knew that watching Tobi sleep wasn’t going to solve the problem of what they should do next, but he couldn’t seem take his eyes off her. He felt his brother stir beside him and noticed that his phone lit up. When he glanced at Kyle’s screen he couldn’t help but cringe when he saw their mom’s name. Kyle cursed softly and quickly made his way out of the room to take the call. Kent had actually considered calling their parents earlier, but the simple truth was he didn’t know how on earth he could explain how they’d made such a series of horrible decisions.

  Kent knew by the expression on Kyle’s face when he returned to the room the conversation hadn’t gone well. Running his hand over his face in frustration, he won
dered what their mom was going to do because it was safe to assume she wasn’t going to sit back and wait for them to fix things. For some reason she had taken a serious shine to Tobi from the moment they had met. Their mom had dropped by a couple of afternoons during the past week to visit and the two of them had enjoyed tea up on the rooftop patio. Both Kyle and Kent knew their mother had an amazing track record when it came to seeing into the hearts of those around her, and she was determined to have Tobi as a daughter-in-law. That had certainly been his and Kyle’s plan as well—until… He wasn’t even going to think about that at the moment. Right now he just wanted to watch the sleeping angel in their bed and hope that his own guardian spirit was willing to step in once again and pull his bumbling ass out of the fire.

  ****

  Kyle wasn’t sure he’d ever heard his mother as angry as she had just been on the phone. Of all the nonsense he and Kent had gotten themselves into over the years, he had never heard her sound as disappointed in them as she had when he’d finally calmed her down enough to talk with her for a few minutes. And as much as he hated the fact she was mad as a wet hen, it had been his dad Dean’s disappointment that had hurt the most. Dad Dell was passionate and full of fire like their mom, so fiery reactions weren’t all that uncommon from them. But the family patriarch, Dean West, was the logical, cool head who always prevailed in the midst of any storm. To hear the censure in their dad’s voice as he pointed out each and every wrong decision he and Kent had made had cut Kyle to the quick.

  Running his hand through his hair, he pulled a chair up alongside Kent and collapsed into it. Never taking his eyes off Tobi, he spoke softly, “Well that was fun. Christ. Thanks a lot for all your support by the way. Asshole.” Kent chuckled quietly but it sounded empty even to his own ears.