He scowled at her. “At least you had the good sense to do that much.”
A blinding wall of outrage rose up to block her vision, making her inhibitions about speaking of what had happened between them evaporate like dew. “You…you have gone too far. How can you possibly have the gall to tell me that I am safer with you than anyone else?”
She made to go around him.
But she was halted when his hand closed around her arm. “Victoria… I…”
The subdued, remorseful tone of his voice penetrated the fog of her ire, and she looked up into his green eyes, and was lost. Never could she stay angry with him, when he appeared so clearly tormented by what had happened himself.
He went on softly. “I did not mean for that to happen. I can only think we were both overcome by our relief that you were safe. And you are absolutely correct to reproach me. I had no right to speak to you as I did. I reacted badly to my own guilt.”
She did not know what to say. She wanted to believe that he was right, that she had felt those stirrings of desire only out of her relief at being saved a second time. Somehow there remained a trace of doubt that she could not quite dismiss.
Firmly she brushed it aside. They had to find some way to go on from here. Because of their agreement, they must remain in close proximity to one another over the next while. Squaring her shoulders, she nodded. “Yes, I believe you must be right. And I accept your apology.”
He looked at his hand on her arm, as if only just realizing that he held her. He let go and stepped back. “Thank you. It will not happen again. Especially not after we have those two arrested.”
Victoria’s eyes grew round with amazement. “Arrested? I do not see how anything would be solved by that.”
He stared at her in shock. “You can’t mean to let them go a second time.”
She frowned. Arresting Reginald and Lloyd would serve no purpose. They were cowards, the both of them. Because they were aristocrats, there was little likelihood either of them would be suitably punished, for what, in truth, had they done? She had come away safely each time they accosted her. It was not worth the scandal that would be brought on the name of Thorn.
She didn’t even wish to discuss the situation, but Jedidiah McBride continued to stare at her in amazement.
Why did he have to be so obstinate? As soon as they settled their differences on one matter, he was on to the next. With deliberate politeness, she said, “I thank you for your concern, but I have no wish to make any of this public. Neither Reginald nor Lloyd is very brave, nor indeed very bright. They had no idea that you were still with me, and so thought I would be an easy mark for their schemes. Finding out that I have someone to protect me will have completely changed their thinking.” She paused for a moment, then shrugged. “After I am married, they will no longer feel they might gain by taking me.”
Jed looked down at her in consternation. Could she not see that she was as beautiful and desirable as a summer morning? He knew she believed Reginald was only after her money, but the man would have to be even more of a fool than he seemed to not see Victoria for what she was. Intelligent, kind, courageous—and, God help him, passionate.
But he knew she would not listen to him now that she really felt that the threat was past. Why she did not want to see the two men punished for what they had done was lost on him. But this time he would bow to her wishes.
After what he had done the previous day, he felt he had little right to press her about this.
Without meeting her gaze, he nodded. “Very well, Victoria. It will be as you wish.” But even as he acquiesced, he made a mental vow not to relax his guard until she was safely married.
Then he realized that thinking of her safely married made him even more uncomfortable than he felt about any possible danger from the two would-be kidnappers. He was saved from having to contemplate just what this might mean by the arrival of one of the footmen.
He approached them hesitantly. “My lady?”
Victoria looked to him in question. “Yes.”
He flushed, looking decidedly uncomfortable about disturbing her. “We are having some difficulty in repairing the eaves that were broken in the recent thunderstorm.”
Jed watched as she immediately became the mistress of Briarwood, putting her personal concerns aside. Victoria motioned for the man to lead the way. “We’ll come and see what can be done, John.”
Having been included, Jed followed them around the side of the huge sandstone mansion. They came to a halt at the rear of the right wing. Looking high above them to where John the footman pointed, Jed saw two of the other male servants standing on the slate roof.
John addressed his mistress. “See there, right above the third-floor window. It’s that piece of the eaves. We can’t get to it from above, and it’s too far for any of the ladders to reach from below.”
Jed took in the situation with a frown of concentration.
He then turned to Victoria, who was tapping her lips with a fingertip.
She said, “I see. Well, it appears that we will have to call in someone who can repair the damage.”
Jed spoke up. “Not necessarily.”
She looked at him in surprise, and he said,”If they were to rig up a bosun’s chair, the house servants could easily reach the damaged section, and in perfect safety.”
Victoria smiled at him with dazzling brilliance, and Jed felt his heart contract. She was so very lovely with her gray eyes shining up at him like that. He forced himself to think about where they were and who they were, even as she answered him. “Can you tell them how to go about this?”
He shrugged, looking up toward the roof at the footman, at the sky, at anything but her. “Of course.”
He addressed John directly, telling him exactly what would be required. In minutes, the servants had done as he instructed and one of them was soon lowered over the side in the bosun’s chair.
Once they had seen that the contraption would indeed work, the men waved down cheerily, then went about fixing the eaves. Jed could see their smiles from the ground.
Victoria then turned to him again. “Thank you so much. Never would I have thought of such an ingenious idea.”
He felt uncomfortable with her praise. “It is a common enough sight on a ship, used for repairing sails and rigging. Not a great invention of my own, by any means.”
She would not be put off. “No, really, it may seem so to you, but I am grateful for your help. It is sometimes difficult to look on a situation in a new way. You bring a fresh perspective to the problems of running an estate because of your many experiences at sea. Twice now you have come to my aid in this way. I shall certainly miss your assistance when you have gone.”
She suddenly became very quiet, and Jed would not allow himself to wonder why. It could do neither of them any good.
With a shake of his head, he swung around, just walking, doing anything to keep from thinking about her. What Victoria might make of his abrupt departure, he did not know. Firmly he told himself he did not care what she believed. He was using her for no other reason than to find his son.
To his surprise, he realized that Victoria was with him. Glancing over at her, he could tell she was preoccupied with something, her expression faraway as she walked along at his side.
Even as he watched, she turned to him with a thoughtful expression. Her face was also undeniably weary, despite her beauty, as she wiped a stray curl from her forehead. “I really don’t think you understand how good it is to have someone to take even a small amount of the responsibility of taking care of all this.” Her hand swept the air around her. “There is always so much to do, especially at this time of year.” A harried laugh escaped her. “At any time of year. Old stores have to be sold or transferred to make way for new crops in the spring. Everything must be nursed along in summer. Then comes the harvest in the fall. The problems of cold and hunger in winter. And that is making no mention of the estate’s other business interests, the mills, the mines
, the potteries.”
“Don’t you have people to manage such things?”
“Oh, yes,” she replied, “but my father preferred to have a close hand in everything that happened on his estates. It is the way our family has done things for generations. The best way to make sure everything is done as you wish, is to do it yourself.”
He could see the sense in this. It was the way he had made his own not-inconsiderable fortune. He realized his assets were probably meager in proportion to what Victoria was responsible for, yet the principle was the same. Jed felt an almost unwilling admiration for her. Unwilling because he didn’t want to feel any such emotion toward her. The physical desire that drew him to her with nearly irresistible strength was enough.
At the same time, he couldn’t help thinking that fate had dealt a cruel hand to Victoria, in spite of her obvious advantages. It seemed she had little time for any activities other than work. No wonder she wasn’t married. He only hoped that she would find a husband who would take some of this burden from her.
She deserved the things that other women took for granted, such as having children. Jed knew that, given an opportunity, Victoria would make a good mother. She was gentle and patient with children, as he had seen in her treatment of little Sarah. A dedicated and loving husband would free her to have that.
But Jed did not want to think of Victoria as a mother. Especially not as the mother of another man’s children.
To his surprise, he heard himself saying, “If you need anything else while I am here…”
She looked up in astonishment, her gray eyes studying him closely.
He went on quickly, feeling inexplicably uncomfortable. “I mean, if there is anything I can do to help with things…” Jed motioned around them absently, all the while wondering what was going on inside that head of hers as she continued to watch him.
Victoria smiled then, and he felt his heart come to a halt, then start again. Good Lord, he found himself wondering, how could she do that to him so easily, even as he made an attempt to focus on her words.’ “Thank you so very much, Jedidiah. You have already helped me more than you know just by making such a kind offer.” Her smile faded, and she looked down at her riding crop as she tapped it with seeming absentmindedness against the toe of her white leather boot. “But I could not trouble you further. My problems are not yours, and I would not dream of taking any more advantage of your good nature than I already have.”
Jed wanted to tell her that she hadn’t taken advantage of anything, that he wanted to help her, to take some of her burdens from her. He held his tongue. He had been hired to protect her from harm, not to offer advice about her affairs.
Jed looked up to see that they had come to the patio at the back of the main section of the house. From inside, it was accessed by going through the French doors that lead from one of the formal sitting rooms. The patio itself curved around the back of the house and was edged by a series of wide steps that lead down to the formal gardens, which now lay in glorious splendor before them.
They continued on without speaking, seeming to anyone else, he was sure, to be taking a pleasant stroll together. The truth was that Victoria appeared to be lost in her own thoughts again, and Jed was somewhat reluctant to break into them. He was feeling things he did not want to feel toward the woman at his side, feelings of protectiveness and sympathy that he wished would simply go away.
They did not. He passed through the perfectly maintained rows of roses, lilacs, lilies, various ground covers and hedges without really appreciating them.
They reached the end of the gardens without having exchanged another word, halted only by the simple fact that they had reached the edge of a large ornamental pond. As he stood there Jed heard her sigh as she gazed out over the water. Damn, for some reason he was suddenly overwhelmed by the wish that he could in some way lighten the burden that had been placed on Victoria’s slight shoulders.
To his complete amazement, he found himself reaching toward her, placing his hand on her arm. “What do you do to relax, to forget your troubles?”
Victoria looked at Jedidiah in astonishment. She had been lost in her own thoughts, wondering if she would ever find someone to share her life with. Trying with all her might not to picture the man beside her in that role.
Then he touched her. All her efforts to forget how attractive and strong he was, to forget how much she liked having him to lean on, dissolved.
Collecting herself with difficulty, Victoria shook her head, unable to ignore the warmth of his fingers through the thin fabric of her sleeve. “I…do not know.” She tried to think, to answer him, anything to get him to take his hand away. “It has been some time since I even thought of such a thing.”
“Think back, then,” he insisted. “When was the last time you remember doing something just for amusement?”
Prodded by his obvious determination, she cast her mind back. The image that entered it was the memory of the day her father had taken both her and her mother rowing on the pond. She pointed out over the water. “My father took my mother and me out in the rowboat one afternoon. I haven’t thought of it in years, but that was a wonderful day.” In spite of the fact that the memory was poignantly sad, considering that the incident had taken place not long before her parents died, she felt herself smiling in fond remembrance.
“Then let’s get moving,” he told her. “I believe I can find my way around a rowboat.”
Before she could form a reply, or even question why Jedidiah McBride would care about her lack of diversion, he led her toward the small dock that jutted out over the water. The next thing Victoria knew, she was climbing into the rowboat that was moored at the end of the dock.
Jedidiah removed his coat and slung it across the seat for her to sit on. Without even understanding why she was going along with this foolishness, she sat down on it. It was impossible for her to relax. There was so much she had to do. Already she’d spent too much time walking with Jedidiah. Mr. Jameson, the overseer at Riverview Farm, was coming to see her later this very afternoon.
More than that, this small craft was just too intimate a space to contain both herself and the handsome American. She allowed herself a brief glance at Jedidiah as he undid the rope that held the boat to its mooring.
Why was he doing this?
Jed seemed completely unaware of her tension as he settled in and reached for the oars with an expression of determination. Only moments later, they were off, gliding across the small lake.
Neither of them broke the silence that had fallen between them. Looking over at Jedidiah from beneath her long dark lashes, Victoria was amazed anew at just how attractive he was. He stopped rowing for a moment, rolling up the sleeves of his white shirt to expose strong forearms. He then reached up to unbutton the gray waistcoat he wore, and she found her gaze drawn to the wide expanse of his chest beneath his white cotton shirt as he began to exert himself again. His long legs were stretched out before him, and she realized that the tip of his black shoe was touching the tip of her own small boot. There was something unsettlingly intimate about the contact, and Victoria knew she must think of something, anything, other than the man seated across from her.
It was a hazy day, with a hint of dampness in the air, but for the piercing sweetness in her heart it might have been sunny. “Victoria leaned back, telling herself that it was completely foolish of her to take so much pleasure in being with him, in the fact that he was being so nice to her. But she could not totally expel the swell of pleasure inside her.
Trailing her fingers in the cool water to distract herself, she focused her thoughts on a family of swans as they glided past them. The pair were busily attending a group of small, unattractive offspring, and she watched their antics for a moment.
Unexpectedly her mind drifted back to that day with her family. The swans had just hatched their young then, too.
Mother had brought a book of poetry, and she and Victoria had taken turns reading from it in their most thea
trical voices. Her father had teasingly told them that if he should ever lose his fortune he would place them on the stage and they would earn his keep.
The memory was deeply poignant, and her eyes glittered with unshed tears. She did miss them so.
Jedidiah’s voice interrupted her thoughts. “What is wrong, Victoria? Are you so conscientious that it distresses you to leave your work for an hour?”
She looked at him in surprise, at first not comprehending the question, because of her own distraction. Then she saw the teasing glint in his eyes, and could not prevent herself smiling, in spite of her sadness. “No. I’m afraid I was thinking of nothing so noble as that.” She looked around her, waving a hand to indicate the idyllic scene. “I was simply thinking of the last day my parents and I spent some time here. It was shortly before their deaths.”
He stopped rowing, his eyes growing dark with compassion. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you by reminding you of something painful. I’ll take you back in.”
Victoria found herself drowning in the warmth of his gentle concern, unable to look away. It was the very thing that had attracted her to him on the night they met, that and his strength. She had responded to it the same way every time she really needed someone since, such as when Sarah had been burned. He showed her just how kind and gentle a man lay beneath the tough and overconfident exterior. Just as she had been those other times, Victoria was drawn to the sea captain, in spite of the fact that she knew it was sheer madness.
She held out her hand to him. “No, don’t go back. I’m not upset. I was only remembering. And the memory is a happy one, for all that I miss them terribly.”
He hesitated, watching her closely. “Are you sure? Don’t try to spare me.”
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