He took another pine-scented breath and tried to still the rumblings inside him, his gaze fixed on the long-forgotten nativity. Ben had carved that set himself when Jake’s mother was just a girl. When he was a kid, Jake had done the same things that Luke was doing now. Funny, he hadn’t thought about that nativity set in years. But then, he didn’t spend a lot of time thinking about the past or Christmas in particular.
Still, he watched Luke move the cows and sheep around on the table and he found himself smiling again.
“Good. You don’t mind that I set it up. Luke loves it. He’s been playing with it all afternoon.” Then she looked up at him and seemed to see him for the first time. “You look tired. Are you hungry? Anna left a pot of stew cooking before she went home. She said since the blizzard hadn’t hit yet, there was no reason for her to stay.”
“Yeah, the men will be out working in this mess tomorrow so Anna will probably spend the next few days cooking here for everyone. So it’s good she went home to rest up.”
“So many words,” Cass said with a smile. “You must be hungry.”
“Yeah. Hungry.” That was probably the reason his defenses were down enough that he wasn’t telling her to take away the pine branches and pack up the nativity. Had to be the reason, he assured himself.
“Come on,” she said, scooping up Luke and heading for the kitchen without waiting to see if Jake was following. “You can eat and tell me what it’s like out there.”
He fell into step behind her and his gaze dropped unerringly to the curve of her behind in her faded jeans. His body tensed and despite the exhaustion pulling at his every cell, he found he might not be too tired. Whatever else lay between them, there was passion, bright and burning and damned hard to ignore.
Shaking his head, he walked into the kitchen and stopped her before she could take down a bowl and spoon. “I can serve myself. You don’t have to do it.”
Cassie set Luke into a high chair—no doubt also rescued from the attic—strapped him in and said, “I don’t mind. You’ve been out in this mess all day.” She glanced out the window at the wall of snow getting thicker by the minute and shivered. “Sit down.”
He sat beside his son and kept his gaze locked on the boy because he figured that was safer than watching Cassie making herself at home in his kitchen. Memories of Lisa and his failed marriage rushed up to nearly choke him. He didn’t remember a single time that Lisa had come to the kitchen to serve herself. His memories of her were more about what others could do for her. At Christmastime especially, it had been about gifts she expected, the more expensive the better. She never would have gone into the attic after an old nativity set. Never would have strung pine branches around the house.
Cassie wasn’t like her, he told himself, and yet the mistrust was still there. He was waiting, he knew, for Cassie to fail. To show him that underneath her facade, she was another Lisa. She was another invitation to misery. Cassie had come into his life, turned it upside down and shaken it like a child’s snow globe, and then left—only to return with a baby she hadn’t bothered to tell him about.
Didn’t that prove that she couldn’t be trusted?
His heart iced over as he watched her. He couldn’t afford to trust again. Couldn’t risk making another huge mistake. And yet...there was Luke to consider in all this. His son. Jake wouldn’t lose the boy—so that meant finding a way to deal with his mother.
Cassie was humming under her breath as she moved about the room and Jake’s instincts went on high alert. She was too damn cheerful. Here she was, trapped at the ranch, and judging by the strength of this storm she wasn’t going anywhere for quite a while. Yet she was humming. Acting as though she was happy. Why?
“Ben tells me you went out to lay down hay for the cattle before the storm hit.”
“Yeah. Made it back here just in time, too.” He ran one hand through his hair and handed the baby a cracker from the tray on the table. Smiling to himself, he watched as Luke took a big bite and then reached over the edge of the chair to try to share with Boston. Better, he thought, to talk about ranch business, the storm—anything other than what lay between them.
Sighing a little, he explained, “Rather than dig through snow to find grass, cattle will just stand there and starve to death. We laid out hay near a series of caves that will give them shelter if they want it. Best we can do for now.” He glanced out the window and hissed in a breath at the sight of a white wall flying horizontally past the glass.
Mid-afternoon and it was dark outside. He couldn’t see the lights from Ben’s house or the other cabins. The storm was a big one and was bound to get even worse. “After I eat, I’ll check the generator again, make sure it’s good to go if the power gets knocked out.”
“Ben and one of the guys did that earlier while you were gone,” she told him as she served up a bowl of stew that smelled like heaven. “They checked every one of them and they’re all good. Ben says you bought top-of-the-line generators to make sure everyone would stay warm during a power outage.”
Even as pleased as he was at the prospect of a meal, he felt a stab of irritation that she was so at home here. She was close with his grandfather. Had made friends with Anna and the hands who worked on the ranch. He’d seen it for himself the last time she was here. Again, one word echoed in his mind. Why?
Pushing all of his doubts aside for the moment, Jake picked up a spoon and dug in, relishing the warmth that spilled through him at the first bite. When he’d eaten half a bowlful, he glanced up at Cassie, who sat opposite him. Time to get a few things clear. Let her know that she couldn’t just rearrange his house and life as she wanted.
“Maybe you didn’t know this, but I don’t celebrate Christmas.”
“I know,” she said, handing Luke another cracker. “Ben told me.”
“Ben’s got a lot to say.”
“In fairly long sentences, too,” she added with a quirk of her lips.
He sighed, then his gaze fixed briefly on her mouth and the memory of the taste of her swamped him. She was the one woman he couldn’t forget. The one he couldn’t stop wanting. And the one who could make his life the hardest—just by being her.
“If you knew how I felt,” he blurted out, “why all the pine?”
“I didn’t put up a tree,” she pointed out, then reached across to smooth Luke’s hair back from his face.
“That’s not what I asked.”
Shaking her head, she looked at Jake. “This is Luke’s first Christmas and my first Christmas away from my brother and sister. Until we can get back to Boston—” the dog looked up hopefully “—I’m going to do what I can here.”
Back to Boston.
Those three words wiped out any other argument he might have made about the Christmas decorations. A sinking sensation opened up in his gut. It felt as cold as the storm raging outside the warmth of the house.
The thought of Cassie’s leaving wasn’t something he was willing to consider. Whether she liked it or not, she was staying. So before anything else was said, they had to get this one thing straight between them.
“You’re not going back,” he told her, his gaze locked on hers, so he saw the flare of outrage spark in those gray eyes. “At least, no time soon. So you might as well put through a call to whoever you work for and tell them you’re gone until at least January.”
She stiffened in her chair. “You can’t order me around, Jake.”
“Just did.” He set his spoon in the bowl and though he’d like more of that stew, this conversation had priority. “I want time with the son I just found out I had.”
She flinched. Good. Even better if she really thought he was willing to let her leave come January, because it would keep her defenses down. The truth was, he would do whatever he had to do to make sure that she and Luke never left this ranch. He might not be husband and father ma
terial, but that didn’t matter anymore, did it? Trust each other or not, the two of them were linked by a son they both wanted. For now, that would be enough.
Sighing, Cassie said, “I work for myself. From home. I do billing for several small companies in Boston.”
Again, that tail thumped against the floor.
“Good. So you can stay with no worries.” He carried his bowl to the sink and rinsed it out. Turning, he braced both hands on the counter behind him and looked at her. Jake had the feeling he could stare at Cassie forever and never tire of the view.
When that thought sailed through his mind, he told himself he should probably be worried. But he wasn’t. He might not trust her completely, but he could admit, at least silently, that she tugged at strings inside him he hadn’t even known were there. She was thawing a heart that had been cold for so long, it was a wonder it could beat.
Even when her fog-gray eyes were flashing with indignation, as they were now, she was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen in his life. And he wanted her now more than he wanted to go on living. Everything in him itched to take her. To lose himself in her heat and scent.
“I’ll stay,” she said shortly as she pushed up from her chair and crossed to him. “For now, anyway.”
At least they agreed on that much, Jake told himself, looking down into her eyes, feeling himself fall into that smoky fog.
“But this isn’t settled, Jake,” she whispered.
Giving in to instinct, Jake reached for her, dragged her close and kissed her, hard and deep. His head swam, his blood rushed and his heartbeat pounded so hard it should have sounded like a drum in the stillness of the room.
She yielded to him, bending her body into his, wrapping her arms around his neck and parting her lips for his tongue. Desire sizzled into a blistering arc between them. When he pulled his head back after what felt like an eternity, he stared at her and agreed, “Not settled.”
* * *
When his phone rang, Ben picked it up, smiling. “Hello, honey.”
“Hi, Dad,” Elise said. “How’s it going on your end?”
Ben looked through his windows at the main house and imagined the three people inside it. Cassie and Jake were making this so much harder on themselves than it had to be. Ben had seen for himself what was shining in the air between those two. And with the baby they shared, they had the beginnings of something wonderful—if they chose to take the chance.
“It’s...interesting,” he finally said, settling into his chair. “That baby is a cutie.”
“He is, in the pictures Cass’s sister showed me.” She sighed a little. “Luke looks just like Jake at that age. I can’t believe I have a grandson I’ve never even met. And now, with Cass as angry at me as she is, who knows when I will meet him?”
“You did the right thing, Elise,” Ben told his daughter. “Threatening to take the baby. Jake and Cassie both were too stubborn to see what was right in front of them until they were faced with a common enemy.”
“That’s me,” Elise Hunter said with a sigh. “The enemy.”
“It’ll work out, honey. Now, let me tell you about your grandson...”
* * *
The blizzard raged for the next three days.
Cassie had never seen anything like it. Every time the wind died down long enough for the men to get out and run the snowplows across the yard—as soon as they were finished it all began again. Trees were bent with the weight of the snow on their branches. Drifts piled high against the sides of the ranch buildings and the wind howled. It was like living in the middle of a disaster movie.
And yet, in a weird way, the storm forced a closeness that she and Jake might have spent months building between them otherwise. She worked day and night, just as he and the hands did, catching brief naps whenever she could. She brewed coffee by the gallon, made hundreds of sandwiches and oceans of soup. The men came in and out of the house at all hours, looking for food or just a chance to get out of the wind.
Whenever they showed up, she was ready. There was hot soup, cookies, slow-cooker meals. The kitchen stove never cooled off and she was busier than she’d ever been before, and yet Cassie couldn’t remember a time when she’d enjoyed herself more. She was needed here, and seeing approval and surprise in Jake’s eyes was as good as a medal to her.
She knew he’d half expected her to sit out the storm hiding in her room or concentrating solely on Luke. But as she jumped in to help, she saw that he was grateful. And that made the hard work worth every minute.
Of course, she also found time to torment him, too. She knew he didn’t like Christmas, but she didn’t know why. And since he wouldn’t talk to her, tell her what he was feeling, she went right on, building Christmas piece by piece. Every night, when he came back to the ranch house, there were more decorations spread around. She found old strings of lights in the attic, and hung them around the main room, draping them over the pine branches. With the generator’s help, they cast a multicolored glow over the big room.
In the attic she’d also found an abandoned, threadbare quilt that she’d cut up and, in snatches of time when she wasn’t cooking, sewn into Christmas stockings. Three of them. She hung them from the mantel and couldn’t help but be proud. And today, with what looked like a break in the storm, she’d liberated an old box of ornaments from the attic. They might not have a tree, but she could hang the decorations from the pine boughs, adding to the determinedly cheerful picture she was trying so hard to create.
“What’ve you got there?”
Cass jumped, startled, and looked up at Jake as he walked into the great room. She was seated in front of the hearth, where a fire snapped and hissed, sending heat out into the room. The box of ornaments was in front of her and she’d already unwrapped several layers of tissue paper to reveal toy soldiers, a miniature fire engine that Luke would love, and a Christmas star.
“I went up to the attic a little while ago and found this.”
“That attic must be about empty by now.” Shaking his head, he crouched beside her and picked up the fire engine. The ornament looked even smaller on the palm of his big hand, but he stroked the tip of one finger gently across its chipped paint. “I remember this.”
Her heart twisted a little at the tenderness in his eyes and the bemused smile on his face. He kept so much of himself locked away that seeing even a small part of him revealed was like opening a Christmas present and finding exactly what you had hoped for.
As she watched, he eased down to sit on the floor beside her, his back to the fireplace. “I was five or six, I guess, and wanted to be a fireman. Mom bought this for me at a store in Whitefish. It was the ornament I always hung on the tree. My sister’s was a stupid dancing bear and—”
“This one?” Cass held it out to him and he nodded, taking the little bear standing on her toes in ballet shoes and a ragged tutu.
“Yeah. She wanted to be a dancer.” He snorted. “Beth is so clumsy she trips over her own feet, but she was always trying to dance.”
“Dreams are a good thing,” Cass said quietly, trying not to shatter the moment.
“Yeah,” he said, frowning as he looked at pieces of his past for another long moment before shifting his gaze to her again. She saw emotion crowd his eyes before he shuttered them and asked, “Where’s Luke?”
Disappointment curled in the pit of her stomach. The chance for a deeper connection was lost as he stepped back behind the wall he kept between them. Even loving him wouldn’t be enough to keep her here, Cass told herself. Not if he couldn’t give. Bend. Not if he insisted on maintaining emotional distance from her.
“Sleeping,” she said, letting go of the hurt wrapping itself around her heart. “Boston’s lying under the crib. I swear that dog’s better than a baby monitor. He lets me know instantly when Luke wakes up.”
“Good. Th
at’s...good.” He stared down at the ornaments in his hands and she could tell he was mentally miles away from this room. And her. He didn’t want to open up with her, she knew that. But maybe if she pushed a little, at just the right time...
“Why’d you get him? Boston?”
He lifted his eyes to meet hers. A second ticked past. Then two. Then a few more, before he finally answered on a gusty sigh. “Because the house was too damn quiet after you left.”
Warmth stole through her like a whispered breath. “You missed me.”
Scowling, he set the ornaments back into the box with a gentleness that told her he still treasured those reminders of his past, whether he wanted to admit it or not. “Yeah. Didn’t expect to. Wasn’t happy about it. But yeah.”
“I hoped you might call me, but you didn’t.”
He sighed. “Thought about it. A lot. I did miss you, though.”
“I missed you, too.” God, she had missed him. The sound of his taciturn voice. The heat of his body coiled around hers in the middle of the night. She’d missed hearing his boots on the hardwood floors. Missed seeing his hat hanging on a peg by the door. She’d missed the rare, treasured smiles he gave her and the way he fought against the tenderness that was a part of him. She’d missed everything about him.
His smile faded until his features were still and if she hadn’t seen the suddenly churning emotions in his eyes, Cass might have thought he hadn’t even heard her. “You should have called me, Cassie. About Luke. You should have called.”
“I should have,” she agreed and leaned closer, drawn to this man as she had never been drawn to another. But was that enough to build a lifetime on? Shared passion? Could she take that risk not only for herself, but for her son?
Jake leaned in, too, and then they were kissing and Cass’s body lit up like the flickering lights ringing the room. She felt a blast of awareness sizzle through her system, trailing sparks through her bloodstream. She reached for him, linking her arms around his neck and holding on, as if afraid he would pull away, pull back.
The Cowboy's Pride and Joy Page 13
