A Family's Heartbreak

by Kitty Neale

  ‘Mum, I don’t need this right now. I just want to know where my daughter is.’

  ‘What about the rest of them? You’ve got five kids, not one.’

  ‘Gloria is my priority at the moment.’

  ‘So it doesn’t matter to you that Henry has been knocking six bells out of Jenny and terrifying the life out of Pamela and the boys?’

  Lizzie knew she’d have to placate her mother and said, ‘Of course it matters, but I ain’t got room to take them all in. As it is Gloria will have to sleep on my sofa, but at least she won’t be living with a bloke and risking getting knocked up.’

  ‘Yeah, well, no thanks to you but the others ain’t living with their father now. Jenny moved them all out and already Pamela’s stopped wetting the bed, Timmy’s not having nightmares any more and Peter’s so much better. Jenny has done the right thing, but she’s only twenty-two and shouldn’t be forced to look after her brothers and sisters. That’s your job! You’re their mother!’

  Lizzie ground her teeth. She felt the urge to stick two fingers up at her mother and walk out, but she still hadn’t discovered where to find Gloria.

  ‘What’s this? No reaction. Nothing to say?’ her mother asked sarcastically.

  ‘Mum, I don’t know what you expect me to do. I’ve told you I haven’t got room for them so just tell me where Gloria is, and I’ll go. Me being here clearly upsets you.’

  ‘She’s living with a bloke called Dennis above Queenie’s fag shop.’

  ‘What, the shop under the railway bridge?’

  ‘Yes, that’s the one. She works in there too.’

  ‘Thanks, Mum. I’ll go and see her right now. Once I’ve got Gloria sorted I’ll go to see the rest of the kids. Where are they living?

  ‘They’re settled, happy, and they don’t need you turning up only to bugger off again for months on end.’

  ‘They’re my kids. I love ’em and I’ve a right to see them.’

  ‘Love! You don’t know the meaning of the word.’

  Lizzie could see her mother was in the mood for a fight, and that it would be pointless to argue with her. At least she knew where to find Gloria, and that would do for now. She smiled sardonically and said, ‘If you say so, Mum, but I’m going now.’

  Her mother sniffed and turned her head away, saying nothing as Lizzie marched out. Lizzie didn’t care. She had to persuade Gloria to live with her and planned how to achieve that as she hurried to Queenie’s shop. One thing was for sure, she wouldn’t shout and bawl like her mother. You could catch more flies with honey than spite.

  Gloria made no secret of her bad mood and had been rude to several customers that morning. Queenie wasn’t in the shop to hear her, not that it would have made a difference to Gloria if she had been. She was in half a mind to walk out. If Dennis wasn’t prepared to work, then why should she?

  As Gloria stacked some shelves behind the counter, she gritted her teeth when the bell above the door rang, signalling another customer. She turned around and was staggered to see her mother walk in.

  ‘Hello, sweetheart,’ her mum said cheerily.

  ‘Hello,’ Gloria answered, but she couldn’t bring herself to smile.

  ‘Your gran told me where to find you. I was wondering if I could have a word.’

  ‘If you want,’ Gloria responded, with a shrug of her shoulders.

  ‘What time do you get a break?’

  ‘I don’t. If you’ve got something to say, just say it.’

  ‘Oh … right …’ her mum answered awkwardly as she looked around the shop. ‘I hear you’re living upstairs with a man.’

  ‘Yeah, what of it?’

  ‘Look, I don’t know how to put this, especially coming from me. We both know I’m not exactly an angel, but, well … you’re too young to be living with a bloke. It’d be different if you were married.’

  ‘Yeah, you’re right, that is rich coming from you. I ain’t being funny, Mum, but it’s none of your business.’

  ‘I know, but surely you don’t want to ruin your reputation. Believe me, I know what it’s like. I’ve had women looking down at me, calling me a tart, and I don’t want that to happen to you. If you come and live with me, you can still see Dennis and … and it would be lovely for us to spend some time together. I … I miss you.’

  It was unlike Gloria to be lost for words, but she stood with her mouth open as she tried to digest her mother’s offer. The fact that her mother was missing her was the last thing she expected to hear.

  ‘I realise that me showing up out of the blue and asking you to come and live with me is probably a bit of a shock, but what do you say?’

  ‘Err … I don’t know,’ Gloria answered slowly.

  ‘I’ve got myself a smashing man, Gloria, rich too. He’s always spoiling me rotten with presents and I’m sure he’d do the same for you. He says you should be with us, under our roof, and not shacked up with a bloke.’

  ‘Oh, I see. So this is all your boyfriend’s idea, is it?’

  ‘Of course not. We both agree it’s for the best. Come on, we can have some proper girlie fun together and Dennis can call in whenever he likes.’

  Gloria would never admit it to anyone, but though she’d put a front on and acted like she hated her mother, in truth she’d missed her. She hadn’t allowed any of her siblings to see, but she’d often cried in the bathroom, longing for her mum’s comfort. Gloria also knew that what Jenny had said about Dennis was correct. He was lazy, and he wasn’t good enough for her. She’d had enough of him but living with Dennis was better than moving back into Craig’s cramped flat. Maybe her mother’s offer was the perfect solution. ‘Yes, all right. I’ll come and live with you,’ Gloria answered, and at last smiled at her mum.

  ‘Really? Oh, Gloria, that’s wonderful. What time do you finish? I can come back and help you pack your things.’

  ‘I don’t need your help. I haven’t got a lot to pack.’

  ‘If you’re sure, I’ll come back and wait outside for you. I’m so excited that you’re coming to live with us, and I can’t wait for you to meet Dwight.’

  Gloria frowned. Dwight? Surely not the American who’d offered her tickets to the dancehall? It had to be: there couldn’t be two Dwights in Balham. Gloria recalled the lustful look she’d seen when he’d copped an eyeful of her cleavage and was sure he’d been flirting with her. She shuddered. The man was old enough to be her father. Still, she reasoned, once he realised who she was he’d probably regret his behaviour in the shop. He’d behave himself, at least she hoped so. If he didn’t, Dwight would feel her knee sharply in his groin.

  Chapter 14

  That evening, Henry came home with a used handbag for Audrey. He’d found it in one of the dustbins and thought it looked in good nick. It was cream leather with a gold clasp. The only flaw Henry could see was a small ink stain inside. He hoped Audrey would like it or at least be appreciative of his efforts. His wife had never been grateful for anything he’d brought home, except his wages. The good stuff that people threw out never ceased to amaze Henry, yet Lizzie would always tell him to get the flea-bitten rubbish out of her house.

  ‘’Ere, love, I got you this today,’ Henry said as he sat at the kitchen table and slid the bag across.

  Audrey was busy stirring something on the stove, but when she turned to look, Henry saw her eyes well up. ‘What’s wrong? Don’t you like it?’ he asked.

  ‘Yes, it’s lovely, thank you,’ Audrey said as she ran her hand over the bag. ‘I’ve never had anyone bring me presents.’

  ‘It ain’t new, but I’m always finding quality stuff like this. If you like it there’ll be plenty more where that came from.’

  Audrey smiled at him, but the smile was weak. He noticed a small purple bruise on her left cheek, probably left by one of his fingers when he’d slapped her the night before. He felt bad about it now, but fuelled with beer and brandy she’d narked him when she’d accidentally knocked over his glass. ‘Look, I’m sorry I lashed out at you las
t night,’ he offered, talking to her back as she attended to the saucepan. ‘Just try and be a bit less clumsy in future.’

  ‘I’ll do my best, Henry,’ Audrey answered quietly.

  ‘Right, what’s for tea?’ he asked, satisfied that she didn’t seem to be harbouring any ill-feelings towards him.

  ‘Pork chops. I’m just making the gravy for you. Is that all right?’

  ‘Yeah, it’s fine,’ he said, fishing in his pocket. ‘Tell ya what, here’s a few bob to put in that handbag. Treat yourself to something tomorrow.’

  ‘Oh, thank you,’ Audrey said, then turned to quickly scoop up the coins.

  ‘Get a move on with my grub. Once I’ve got it down me neck I’m gonna have a quick wash then shoot out again. It’s darts night in the Bedford. Fancy coming? Most of the wives will be there.’

  ‘Err … yes … if you like,’ Audrey said as she placed his plate of food in front of him and a smaller one opposite for herself.

  Henry didn’t mind her tagging along. He used to enjoy having Lizzie on his arm to show off, but he’d always had to keep one eye on the dartboard and another on her. Audrey wasn’t a head-turner like his wife, so he didn’t have to worry about other blokes chatting her up.

  He picked up his knife and fork and looked from Audrey to his plate piled high with the chop, vegetables and boiled potatoes. He smacked his lips together and shoved a forkful of hot food in his mouth. ‘You turn out a good meal, Audrey. Once you’ve had yours, go and tidy yourself up a bit. Wear that cream dress you had on the other day, it’ll go nice with your new bag.’

  Audrey nodded, and after eating about half of her dinner she scampered out of the kitchen whilst Henry scoffed his. He’d suggested the cream dress as it was the only outfit he knew of that didn’t make her look quite as frumpy. He hoped she’d put on a bit of make-up too, but wasn’t there a saying, something about not being able to make a silk purse out of a sow’s ear? Yeah, he thought, that certainly applied to Audrey.

  Jenny leaned against the kitchen worktop and out of earshot from the boys she said to Craig, ‘My gran said that my mum called in to see her earlier.’

  Pamela had gone to a friend’s house for tea, and Timmy and Peter were playing in a camp they’d made in the bedroom from two old sheets and a broken broomstick.

  ‘Did Edith mention that we’re living up here?’ Craig asked quietly.

  ‘No, she refused to tell my mum where we are, but she was more interested in finding Gloria.’

  ‘Gloria, why?’

  ‘She said it isn’t right that Gloria’s living with Dennis. She wants her to move in with her and her new man Dwight.’

  ‘Really? She didn’t seem bothered when you told her. I wonder why she’s changed her tune.’

  ‘Who knows what goes on in my mother’s head? I just hope she has more success with Gloria than we did, especially after what Thelma said at work today. She threatened that if Gloria doesn’t move out by the end of the week, she’ll be sorry.’

  ‘I don’t like the sound of that.’

  ‘Nor me.’

  ‘Try not to worry. I can’t see Dennis letting his mother chuck her out, and even if she does, Gloria will have your mum’s offer.’

  ‘Yes, that’s true, and I suppose if Gloria is going to listen to anyone, it’s our mum,’ Jenny said, finding her smile again. ‘Guess what else happened at work today?’

  ‘You got a pay rise?’

  ‘No.’

  ‘You got an extra day’s holiday?’

  ‘No.’

  ‘I give up, but judging by that happy face it must have been something good.’

  ‘I told everyone about us getting married.’

  Craig chuckled, then said, ‘I wish I’d had someone to tell today. I’ve been bursting with it but seeing as there’s only me in my workshop … I have to keep pinching myself to make sure this isn’t all a dream. Honestly, Jen, you’ve made me the happiest man in the world.’

  Jenny felt the same, but unlike Craig, she wasn’t good at putting her feelings into words. ‘Me too,’ she whispered, and looked up at him shyly from under her lashes.

  He gazed at her longingly which made her stomach flip with excitement, then he embraced her and they kissed.

  ‘Yuk, that’s disgusting,’ Timmy said.

  Jenny pulled away from Craig to see the boy standing in the kitchen doorway, and smiling at him she said, ‘No, it isn’t.’

  ‘Peter, Jenny was snogging Craig,’ shouted Timmy over his shoulder.

  ‘What, again?’ Peter said as he turned up to stand beside his brother.

  ‘Yes, again. You two are always kissing and holding hands but I don’t know why. I kissed Maggie Yates when we was playing kiss chase, but it was ’orrible.’

  Jenny stifled a giggle, and Craig was obviously fighting to keep a straight face as he asked, ‘What was so horrible about kissing Maggie Yates?’

  ‘Her lips were wet and tasted of milk that had gone off. I ain’t never kissing a girl again.’

  ‘You will, Timmy, when you meet the girl you love.’

  ‘No way! But you must really love my sister ’cos you’re always kissing her.’

  ‘I do. I love her very much indeed.’

  ‘Can I have a biscuit please, Jenny?’ asked Peter, losing interest in what they were talking about.

  ‘After your tea. It won’t be long so get that camp in my room tidied up, please.’

  ‘Yeah, all right. Come on, Peter, you can be the Red Indian now,’ Timmy said as the boys went running off again, forgetting all talk of kissing.

  Jenny smiled at Craig. ‘They’re not used to seeing so much affection. I don’t recall my mum and dad having a cuddle in front of us, let alone a kiss.’

  ‘Well, they’d better get used to it, because I intend to kiss you as much as I can, Mrs Brice,’ he said, leaning over to gently rub his full lips on hers.

  ‘I’m not Mrs Brice yet,’ she whispered.

  ‘No, but you will be and the sooner the better.’

  ‘Should we think about finding a bigger place before we arrange our wedding?’

  ‘Yes, probably. Once we’re married we’ll need our own bedroom, and that’s impossible here.’

  Jenny was pleased that Craig was being practical. As much as she wanted to be his wife, she knew they needed more space. Their own bedroom, she thought with a shiver of excitement, wondering what it would be like to share a bed with Craig.

  Gloria had expected Dennis to beg her to stay – that he’d tell her things would be different and he’d get a job. Instead, as she’d packed her bags he’d sat on the bed reading a comic. She had stormed out, taking great satisfaction in slamming the door so hard behind her that it had rattled on its hinges.

  Now, as Gloria walked along Balham High Road with her mum, she wondered what she’d seen in him. She originally thought that as Dennis was older than her he was a real man, but he’d turned out to be idle and childish, even sulking when he didn’t get his own way. He might have dazzled her with his good looks, but he’d soon bored her with his lacklustre personality.

  Dennis was a part of her past now, Gloria realised, and she suddenly felt alive again. Maybe she would take Dwight up on his offer and accept tickets for the dance. It was a good place to meet young men and she felt confident that she’d attract plenty of attention.

  Her mother interrupted her thoughts, saying, ‘I don’t think you should leave Queenie’s until you’ve got another job.’

  ‘Maybe not, but I suppose I could ask Jenny to get me into the factory.’

  ‘I don’t think you’d enjoy working there, love. The women are a load of catty gossips.’

  ‘That’s not what Jen says. She reckons they’re a nice bunch.’

  ‘Your sister thinks everyone is lovely but take it from me, they wouldn’t be nice to someone like you.’

  ‘What do you mean by that?’ Gloria asked indignantly.

  ‘You take after me in looks, and you’ve got a great figure. W
omen don’t always take to people like us. I think it’s jealousy.’

  ‘If you say so, but I’ve never had a problem and I quite fancy working with Jenny. She’d be able to introduce me to all her mates.’

  ‘Are you having a laugh? Most of the women in that factory are old crones, and outside work Jenny doesn’t have any mates. No, I really think you’d be much better off at Queenie’s.’

  If Gloria was honest, she didn’t relish the idea of working in a factory, but if she stayed at Queenie’s she was bound to see Dennis and didn’t fancy that. ‘I dunno, Mum, it’s boring in the shop.’

  ‘It’ll be even more boring in the factory and longer hours too.’

  ‘Yeah, but I’d earn more,’ Gloria answered, beginning to wonder why her mother was so keen to talk her out of working with Jenny.

  ‘Yes, you’d earn more but you’d be working a damn sight harder for it. If I was you, I’d stay put. You’ve got a cushy little number there.’

  ‘What’s so cushy about it?’

  ‘You don’t have a boss breathing down your neck all day, and it’s good hours. I bet you get plenty of little bonuses too, eh?’

  ‘Bonuses, off Queenie, you’ve got to be kidding!’

  ‘No, not from Queenie. I mean the sort of bonuses you help yourself to … you know, packets of fags and that?’

  So that was it. Her mother wanted her to pinch cigarettes. She should have known. There was always a hidden agenda with her mum. ‘I don’t help myself to anything. That would be stealing,’ she lied.

  ‘Huh, if you say so, but I know you, Gloria Lombard. I bet you’ve got your hands in the till too.’

  Gloria had helped herself a few times, but she wasn’t going to tell her mother that. ‘You said this Dwight bloke is wealthy, so how come you’re looking for free fags?’

  ‘He’s shrewd with his money, and though generous in other ways, he thinks I’m a bit of a spendthrift so he sometimes keeps me a bit short. We live in his association flat because he doesn’t believe in wasting money just to put a roof over our heads. He prefers to spend his dosh on buying me nice things. You wait until you see the earrings he bought me – and look at this.’