by Leslie Gould
“How about you?” Rose asked.
He looked at her blankly.
“Do you have a girlfriend?”
A frown crept across his face. “It seems I may have more in common with Wade than I thought, as far as committing.”
Rose wasn’t sure what to say, but once again she felt sad for Trevor.
“That’s why I came here,” he said. “I thought maybe Zane could help me—the whole ‘never leave a fallen soldier’ thing. But he obviously . . .” Zane came through the doors and Trevor’s voice trailed off.
“Hey,” Zane said.
“How’s she doing?” Trevor asked.
“A little better. The surgeon still needs to operate on her pelvis but wants to wait until some of the swelling goes down from the other injuries and from the surgery yesterday.” Zane turned to Rose. “Would you like to see her?”
“Jah, very much.” Rose did want to see Lila, but she suddenly felt hesitant.
Zane must have sensed her hesitation. “I’ll go with you,” he said.
“All right.” Rose stood.
“I’ll wait here,” Trevor said.
Zane nodded. “We’ll have time to talk soon.”
Rose asked if her Dat was with Lila as she followed Zane down the hall. “No, he’s filling out paper work. My mom’s with him.”
“Oh? I thought she had a meeting this morning.”
“She did, but it’s been over for a while.”
“Oh.” As Rose followed Zane through a door, she began to feel a little sick to her stomach. She looked up to see Lila propped up a little in a bed. Her face was cut and starting to bruise, and her blond hair was braided and draped over one shoulder. She wasn’t wearing a Kapp or a scarf. A tube ran under the skin of her arm, and something poked into her finger. Rose felt a little light-headed.
Lila opened her eyes and smiled—or maybe grimaced. Rose stepped to her side, and Lila reached out her hand. As Rose took it, tears welled in her eyes. Her usually capable sister was so small and helpless in the hospital bed. Besides the wounds on her face, cuts covered her arms too. One place was stitched. Rose had never seen her big sister so vulnerable. She’d always been so strong.
“How are you?” Rose asked.
“All right,” Lila answered, her face contorting some. Her blue eyes were bloodshot and heavy. She looked past Rose.
“I’m right here, baby,” Zane said, stepping to Lila’s other side.
Lila seemed to relax a little as Zane held her hand, and she focused on Rose again. “How did you get here?” she asked.
“Trevor gave me a ride.”
Lila frowned and looked at Zane. “Do you think that’s all right?”
Zane shrugged.
Rose bristled. “It was fine. He’s very nice.”
A machine started making a weird noise. Rose stepped back, feeling light-headed again.
“It’s just the blood-pressure cuff,” Zane said, pointing at Lila’s arm. Then Rose noticed the other machines.
A nurse came into the room, asked Lila how she was feeling, and then stood at a computer Rose hadn’t noticed and started typing. “How’s your pain?” the nurse asked.
Lila answered, “Maybe an eight.”
“Time for more meds, then,” the nurse said.
Rose concentrated on her sister. Something dripped from the bag and down through the tube into Lila’s arm. There was a second bag at the end of the bed. Rose turned, thinking maybe she should leave the room and go sit in the waiting room with Trevor.
She swayed a little.
Zane grabbed her arm. “Are you all right?”
Everything went black before she could tell him she wasn’t.
When she came to, she was propped on a chair, with Zane holding her in place.
“I thought someone was getting restless,” the nurse said. “Put her head between her knees.”
“No, I’m all right,” Rose replied, embarrassed. She tried to see the situation from Lila’s angle and feared her sister would think she was being overly dramatic, the way she used to act when she was younger.
“Let’s get you out to the waiting room.” Zane helped Rose stand.
“I’m sorry,” Rose said.
Lila frowned. “It’s disturbing, I know.”
Mortified, Rose leaned against Zane as they shuffled along to the waiting room. Trevor stood when he saw them coming. “Are you all right?” he asked.
Rose nodded. But she wasn’t. She began to cry as Trevor reached out to take her arm. She should have been strong for Lila—instead her sister was still the strong and capable one, even when she’d been horribly injured.
A half hour later, without seeing Dat or Shani, they were on their way home. Rose started crying again. She wasn’t sure if it was a reaction to the fainting or the shock of seeing Lila so hurt.
“There are napkins in the glove box,” Trevor said. “Help yourself.”
Feeling foolish, Rose opened it and grabbed one, noticing the fast-food restaurant logo on the tissue. It looked as if Trevor ate in his car a lot. She wiped her eyes, disappointed in herself. She’d been so sure she’d grown up these last couple of years and learned to put others before herself, but maybe she hadn’t as much as she thought. She’d been eager to see Lila and encourage her, but instead she’d made a scene and only made things harder.
“How about if we go to Strasburg?” Trevor asked. “I drove through there the other day. It’s charming.”
Rose smiled at his choice of words, not expecting a soldier to care about a historic village. But she agreed; it was charming. Her grandmother had a quilt shop, which Rose never spent much time at in the little town. Unlike Lila, she didn’t like to quilt. She’d rather cook.
“Sure,” Rose answered.
As they drove through town, Rose hunched down a little, especially past the quilt shop, not wanting her grandmother to see her riding with an Englischer in his red sports car. But there was no sign of her Mammi through the shop window.
A couple of minutes later, Trevor found a place to park on the street. “How about some food?” he asked. “You’ll feel better.”
Her head was pounding, and she thought a cup of coffee might help. “Sure,” she answered. She had some money in her purse to pay. “The Strasburg Creamery has a deli too—you could get a sandwich.”
Trevor hurried around to her door and helped her out.
“I’m all right.” She still clutched the napkin. “Just embarrassed. Really embarrassed.” And not just from fainting—she’d never done that before—but from the crying too.
“You don’t need to be,” Trevor said. “It could happen to anyone.”
Rose knew he was just being nice. Neither he nor Zane would ever faint in a hospital. Neither would Lila. She’d taken care of their grandmother after her cancer surgery, changing her dressings and everything. Just the thought made Rose feel light-headed again. She needed to get over this. When Lila came home, Rose would be the one caring for her, most likely.
Trevor opened the door to the Creamery and directed Rose to the first booth. “I’m buying,” he said as they sat down.
“You don’t need to,” Rose answered.
His face lit up. “It’s the least I can do.”
Rose only ordered coffee and a cinnamon roll while Trevor ordered a Reuben sandwich, which made Rose wince. Reuben. What would he think of her with the Englischer?
The Creamery served the best ice cream around, and the production of waffle cones filled the entire building with a sweet scent. Shani had brought all the kids into Strasburg for ice cream several times when they were little, which were fond memories now.
Once they settled into a booth with their coffee and food, Trevor asked how Lila was doing.
Rose’s eyes filled with tears again. “I’ve never seen her like that.” She inhaled sharply. “I’m so embarrassed I fainted. She used to think I was overly dramatic—and I was. I didn’t mean to be so today.” She dabbed at her eyes.
“
You? A drama queen?” Trevor shook his head. “I don’t see that in you at all.”
Rose tried to smile. “Well, I do have it in me.” She’d never been as bad as Lila thought, but she’d definitely been more dramatic than Lila ever was. She supposed she could still be.
“She wouldn’t think you fainted on purpose,” Trevor said.
Rose wrapped both hands around her coffee cup. She didn’t really think that—at least she hoped Lila wouldn’t go that far. “That would make me quite the actress, right?”
“Yes, an Academy Award-winning one.” He smiled again.
Rose had read about those awards in the magazines she sometimes bought, although none of it really made sense to her.
Trevor told Rose about the first time he’d heard about Lila. “I didn’t find out about this until we were in Afghanistan, but one of the other soldiers saw a photo of her on Zane’s phone. He teased him about it relentlessly.”
“Oh?” Rose didn’t know anything about a photo of Lila.
Trevor nodded. “We all thought it was pretty weird he had an Amish girlfriend.” He grinned. “I still think it’s weird, but I kind of get it now. I can tell they really love each other.”
Rose nodded and then said, “She wasn’t really his girlfriend back then. She was courting Reuben.”
“Oh.” Trevor tilted his head. “The guy who helped with the milking yesterday?”
Rose nodded and then, not wanting the conversation to stay on Reuben, asked, “Do you know how long you plan to stay in Lancaster?”
He shook his head. “Joel said I could stay for a few days. I’m hoping maybe I can help, considering everything that’s going on with Lila.” He seemed so caring and confident, nothing like the out-of-sorts man he appeared to be on Sunday.
Rose leaned back against the booth as Trevor continued to talk, saying he found Lancaster County fascinating. He went on to say that he’d grown up with just his dad. “My mom left when I was ten. She’d had a few affairs, and the whole town knew. She abruptly changed my world, stole my innocence, really. I ended up figuring out a lot about life at a pretty young age.” The guy liked to talk. He’d played sports in high school—football, basketball, and baseball.
“I found that same camaraderie in the Army,” he said. “Plus, chicks like guys in a uniform.” He smiled. “Just sayin’.”
Rose guessed Trevor looked pretty good in a uniform.
He kept talking. His dad had treated him more like a friend from early high school on, and they got along fine. Not that they talked a lot or anything, but Trevor said he knew he always had a place to stay with his father.
Jah, Rose was embarrassed she’d fainted, but now the day was going better. She liked Trevor. He was so open and honest. She felt a sense of freedom with him, as if she didn’t have to be careful about what she said and did. An entirely different feeling than when she was with Reuben.
Trevor paused a moment and took a drink of coffee. As he put his cup back down, he smiled at her again. She returned the smile, this time without her face growing warm.
She’d never had a running-around time. If Reuben wanted to postpone getting married because he cared more about others than about her, then maybe she should have a little fun while she waited. Nothing life-changing—just a few conversations with Trevor. A few smiles. A tiny bit of flirting. Just enough to distract her from thinking about Lila’s injuries and Reuben’s unselfish ways.
6
Lila knew they were all talking about her out in the hall—her doctor, Dat, and Zane. After two surgeries and over a week in the hospital, it was time for her next move. She hoped to go home. She realized it would be hard to get her in the house, but once she was inside she wouldn’t need to go back out. She knew it would be a stretch for Rose to care for her, and she’d definitely need Shani’s help, but Lila would certainly care for Rose if their roles were reversed. It would be good for Rose to step up and take more responsibility. She’d figure things out.
The nurse came in and checked her vitals. “How are you getting used to that thing?” the woman asked as she pointed to Lila’s hips.
Lila tried to smile, hoping she wouldn’t cry again. Maybe it was the pain pills. Or how broken she was. Or how uncomfortable. Anyway, she’d been crying a lot lately.
“Did you ever play with an Erector set when you were little?”
Lila shook her head. Zane had mentioned the same toy when he first saw the apparatus—it was bolted to both sides of her pelvis and was called a fixator. She had to wear it for six weeks, but it would keep her pelvis in place and allow the crushed bones to grow back together.
She wore a loose gown that rode up over the metal, and a pair of pajama bottoms that rode low on her hips. Shani had brought the bottoms for her, thankfully. Lila hadn’t worn her Kapp at all in the hospital, although Shani had brought her a kerchief to wear over her long hair. There was no use putting it in a bun when she was in bed all the time so Shani had been braiding it for her. That worked best.
Besides commenting on the fixator, Zane and others had compared her to Frankenstein. She didn’t really understand the similarities, even though Zane had tried to explain it, but it seemed they had to do with stitches on her face and arms, along with the bruises that had turned a yellowish purple.
The nurse handed her a pain pill, which Lila accepted with gratitude. She didn’t like taking them, but she couldn’t imagine surviving without them. She’d never experienced such excruciating pain. The swelling was finally going down in her abdomen, but between her internal injuries and her crushed pelvis, she was in constant pain.
The nurse watched her swallow the pill and then left. Lila prayed she could go home. Rose could care for her. A couple of years ago, Rose couldn’t have handled it, but even though her sister had fainted when she’d come to visit, Lila was sure she could handle it now. Fainting was a reaction to being in the hospital, not to Lila’s condition. At least she hoped so. Rose had definitely matured over the years. And she’d grown since she started courting Reuben.
The bulk of figuring out what to do had fallen to Zane, with Shani’s help. Dat didn’t seem to want to be involved.
Zane stepped back into the room. “Your Dat, the doctor, and I want to speak with you.”
Lila nodded. She’d be brave. She’d do what was needed. The worst was over.
But for a moment she was back in the buggy, going through the windshield, over the top of Billie.
“Lila?” Zane said.
She blinked and refocused. Sometimes it was hard to follow a conversation.
The doctor and Dat had stepped into the room.
“Go ahead,” Dat said, deferring to Zane.
His gaze fell back on her as he said, “We have a couple of options. A rehab center . . .”
Lila nodded.
“Or our house.”
She turned her head toward him. “Our house?”
“Getting you in and out of the front door won’t be a problem. We’ll move a bed into the living room—and a recliner, so you can be up part of the time. I’ll finish the downstairs bathroom, starting tomorrow. Not having a shower won’t matter. You’ll have to keep taking sponge baths until the fixator comes off, and by then you’ll be able to move back home. Anyway, I’ll move in with my folks. Gideon says that’s all right under the circumstances, and Mom and Rose will take turns caring for you.”
“Can I go home instead?” Lila asked.
Dat shook his head. “We’d have to carry you into the house, and that wouldn’t be safe with your injuries, not so soon anyway.”
“Can’t you build a ramp?” Lila asked. Dat and Charlie had built a ramp for Joel when he was in a wheelchair.
“The incline is too steep,” Zane answered.
Dat said, “Besides, it will be easier for Shani to care for you in the little house. It will be closer for her.”
“Rose could care for me at home.”
Dat shook his head. “She can help in the little house, but it would be too
much for her to do all of it.”
Lila frowned. If Rose was injured, Dat wouldn’t be sending her off somewhere else. But maybe it was more than that—maybe he didn’t want Lila in the house. Maybe he thought it would be too much for all of them. She blinked back her tears. Maybe if she were his biological daughter, like Rose was, Dat would feel differently.
“We need to decide tonight,” Zane said.
“I’ll go do some paper work,” the doctor said. “Send one of the nurses for me once you’ve made up your mind. Then I’ll write the needed orders.”
Lila and Zane both thanked the doctor at the same time. As he left, Shani stepped into the room. “What’s the matter?”
“Has anyone asked Rose? Maybe she would be fine caring for me at our house. It wouldn’t be too hard to carry me in, just once. Right?” Then again, even though the nurses were trained and had experience, they still jostled her in ways that made the pain worse. Getting carried into the house and having Rose care for her might mean more pain. Still, she wondered what Rose was willing to do. “We could call the barn phone,” she said. “And hope she’s still out there and answers.”
“She should be done with the milking by now,” Dat answered.
“Trevor said he planned to help today.” Zane looked at his mom. “You could call his cell—he could go tell Rose to call.”
“Who else was helping with the milking, besides Trudy?” Shani asked.
Zane’s face reddened. “I didn’t ask.”
Dat crossed his arms. “Maybe Reuben.”
Shani took out her cell phone. “I’ll call the barn first.” When no one answered, she dialed the second number, stepping to the corner of the room. Lila overheard her say, “Okay. We’ll see you soon.”
As she hung up, Shani said, “They’re on their way here.”
Lila shifted her focus to Dat. His arms were still crossed, and his lips turned down into a frown. “Where’s Trudy?” Lila asked.
