Amish Weddings

by Leslie Gould

  “Could that have affected your memory of the accident?”

  “Hold on,” Zane said. “What are you implying?”

  The officer closed his notebook. “She went through a traumatic event and had a brain injury. She wouldn’t be the first person not to remember an accident correctly.” He stood. “And I took a look at the horse. He seems pretty skittish.”

  “He was traumatized too,” Zane said.

  Lila tried to get his attention with her eyes, but he was staring the officer down.

  “Look,” the deputy said. “I’m just doing my job.”

  Zane crossed his arms. “Sounds like a he-said-she-said situation.”

  “Exactly,” the deputy said.

  “Unless there were other witnesses.”

  “That doesn’t appear to be the case.” The man stood. “I got the information I needed. I’ll see myself out.”

  Lila’s stomach clenched as he headed toward the front door.

  After the door clicked shut, Lila tried to keep her voice calm. “How odd.”

  “Intimidating is more like it.” Zane stared at the door. “We need to find you a lawyer.”

  At first she thought he was joking. “Zane?”

  He turned around, an angry expression on his face.

  “We’re Amish, remember? We don’t ‘find a lawyer.’ And we certainly don’t sue.”

  Zane’s stubborn look, the one that was so familiar from their childhood, settled on his face. “Yeah, but this is about justice. Plus medical bills that could easily top a hundred fifty thousand dollars.”

  She knew the bills would be expensive, but she wouldn’t have guessed that much. That could wipe out the district’s mutual aid fund, the collection of money they all contributed to in case of emergencies. “Let’s see what happens,” she said. “We can get advice from Gideon. Surely he’s dealt with this before.”

  Zane didn’t reply—instead he said he was going to finish the sanding in the bathroom.

  “Wait,” Lila said. “What’s going on with Trevor and Rose?”

  “Nothing,” Zane said. “Rose is courting Reuben.”

  “She seems awfully taken with Trevor. They took their time coming into the kitchen today.”

  “Oh,” Zane said. “I didn’t notice. There’s no way Trevor would let anything happen. I’m sure of it, but I’ll ask him.”

  She settled down into the bed. At least Trevor was staying at Eve and Charlie’s now—he wouldn’t be around as much as he had been.

  “Anything else?” Zane asked.

  She shook her head. Working on a house project wasn’t usually what one did on a Sunday, not even a non-church one, but the toilet was leaking.

  When she woke up a couple of hours later, Shani sat beside her reading a book but looked up as soon as Lila stirred. “How are you, sweetie?”

  Lila took a moment before she spoke. Shani stood and handed Lila her water bottle. After Lila took a long drink she asked where Zane was.

  “Trevor took him into town,” Shani said. “He needed a part for the toilet.”

  “Oh,” Lila said, sinking back against the bed. She couldn’t expect Zane to be at her side all the time, not when he needed to work, sleep, and get the plumbing working. He frustrated her when he was nearby, but she felt panicked when he was away.

  Zane had been right about the little house being the best place for her though. Dat hadn’t been over to see her at all—clearly he hadn’t wanted her at his house. She felt a stab of homesickness. She was thankful for Shani, she really was, but at the moment she felt a little lost.

  10

  That evening, while Rose helped with the milking, Dat asked her what time Reuben was coming by.

  “He’s not,” she answered.

  He stood with the feed shovel in midair. “You’re not going to the singing?”

  “No,” she answered. “I left him a message a couple of hours ago. I’m going to stay with Lila tonight.” Simon and Casey had headed back to Maryland, where she was stationed, an hour ago. Leave it to Simon not to stay and help with the milking.

  Dat gave her a questioning look, but she turned back to the cow. The less she said to Dat, the better. Maybe it would work for her to have a couple of weeks of running around, but that didn’t mean she had to tell her Dat what she was doing. A little bit of a break from Reuben would do her good.

  She knew he had been judgmental and critical of her family the evening before. True, they weren’t a typical Amish family, and she knew their chaos made him uncomfortable. But it was her family, and she loved them all dearly. His criticalness, combined with his high standards for himself, was beginning to rile her. It wasn’t that she didn’t think they had a future together. She did. But she was a hundred percent sure a break would do her good.

  After a supper of navy-bean soup and biscuits, Rose read to Trudy and then started a game of Scrabble with her. As they played, Rose thought of the ride home with Trevor from the little house that morning. He’d stopped the car at the end of the drive, where Dat couldn’t see them, and let the engine idle while they talked. He shared more about Afghanistan, about the day that Zane was injured and then later, after Zane had returned to the base, when their vehicle detonated the IED. Improvised explosive device, Trevor had to explain. A bomb. He’d been driving and took, along with their sergeant, the worst of the explosion.

  She listened and listened, but finally she said she needed to get going. She didn’t want Dat to come down the lane in the buggy and find her with Trevor. But when she reached the house, Dat was napping in his chair. As it turned out, he and Trudy didn’t go visiting at all.

  Dat simply said he needed a day of rest. Rose had noticed Dat was slowing down some, but he always seemed to perk up when he was around Beth. She was good for Dat—she kept him calm and centered and noticing what was going on around him in a way he’d never been capable of before. It really was a pity they couldn’t marry.

  “Rose?” Trudy had one hand in the air.

  “What?” Rose shifted in her chair, wondering how long she’d been daydreaming.

  Trudy exhaled as her hands fell to her lap. “Like I’ve said three times, it’s your turn.”

  “Oh,” Rose responded, looking at her tiles as Dat passed through the kitchen.

  “Guder Nacht,” he said as he reached the hall. “See you tomorrow.”

  Thankfully Joel would help him with the milking in the morning. And Trudy was going to make breakfast. It would be the first day Shani worked since Lila’s accident. Rose would care for Lila in the morning and then take Trudy to school. Then she’d return to Lila. It was a crazy schedule. Thankfully Shani had the rest of the week off.

  “Maybe I’ll make Dutch babies,” Trudy said.

  “Stick with scrambled eggs and ham slices,” Rose said. “That’s easy and it will fill Dat up.”

  After a couple more turns, Rose told Trudy it was time for bed. “I need to get over to help get Lila to bed.”

  Trudy’s lip turned down. She didn’t like sleeping in their room by herself. She’d shared it her entire life with both Lila and Rose.

  “I’ll see you in the morning,” Rose said. She already had her bag packed and by the back door.

  “Can’t I go with you?”

  Rose shook her head. “There’s only one cot.” There were other reasons too, but those didn’t concern Trudy. “Brush your teeth,” Rose said. “And don’t forget to say your prayers.” Trudy only had three years of school left, and then she’d be running the household for Dat. It was good for her to start taking more responsibility. They’d all spoiled her.

  As Rose walked down the lane under the light of a nearly full moon, she couldn’t help but hope Trevor would come along and give her a ride. Just the thought of him gave her a jolt as she passed the cedar tree and approached Shani and Joel’s house. Trevor’s car sat in the driveway. Maybe she would see him.

  The evening had grown crisp and cold, and she pulled her cape tighter as she walked slowly b
y the Becks’ home. When no one came out, she stepped around the side of the barn. A single lamp burned in the kitchen window of the little house. Perhaps Shani had already helped Lila get ready for bed.

  As she hurried onto the porch, the door swung open and Trevor stepped into the near darkness. “I was waiting for you,” he said. “To say good-night.”

  Rose smiled and stepped closer.

  He gazed down.

  “Who all is here?” she asked.

  “Just Zane and me. We’re ready to leave though.” He stayed in the doorway. “So did you go to the singing tonight?”

  She shook her head. “I played games with Trudy instead.”

  He smiled.

  “Ready?” Zane asked, coming up behind Trevor.

  “Yep,” he answered, stepping aside so Rose could enter the house.

  Zane wore an Englisch jacket over his Amish shirt. “Lila just had her pain meds.”

  Rose told the boys good-night, shut the door, and then took off her cape and hung it on a peg by the front door. The fire was roaring, and it was too warm in the little house. She approached Lila and after saying hello added, “Did Shani already get you ready for bed?”

  Lila nodded. Rose tucked the quilt around her sister, feeling she should do something, and then she moved the lamp and sat down in the recliner, pulling the latest copy of the Budget from her bag.

  When she was certain Lila had fallen asleep, she put her cape back on and tiptoed to the front door.

  Lila stirred. “Where are you going?”

  “To get some fresh air. It’s burning up in here.”

  “Rose . . .”

  “Honestly, Lila. I’m just going to stand on the porch for a minute and then change into my nightgown and get some sleep before you need your next pill.” She turned the doorknob. When Lila didn’t respond, she went ahead and stepped onto the porch, breathing in the cool air as she pulled the door closed. She could see a sliver of light coming through the apple trees from the Becks’ house. She continued on, knowing exactly what she was hoping for. She was sure it wouldn’t happen though. Trevor had probably gone over to Eve and Charlie’s as soon as he left.

  She walked along the barn and then stopped at the corner, craning her neck to see if Trevor’s car was still there. It was.

  “Hey.”

  She gasped and then giggled. It was Trevor, at the other corner of the barn. “Hey, yourself,” she said and then giggled again at the risk she was taking. But she wasn’t going to feel guilty about it. She should have spent some time running around two years ago. That was the mistake she’d made.

  “What are you doing?” He slipped something into his pocket.

  “Getting some fresh air,” she answered. “It’s a hothouse in there.”

  “Yeah,” he said. “Well, Lila was cold, and Zane kept stoking the fire. I told him we were all going to die from heatstroke, but he wouldn’t listen.”

  Rose smiled and then said, “I thought you would have left by now. What are you doing out here?”

  “I was hoping you’d come out to say good-night.”

  Her heart skipped a beat. “I already said good-night,” she teased.

  He stepped closer. “A second good-night, then.” His breath smelled a little sweet and a little peppery at the same time. He turned on the flashlight on his phone and nodded his head toward the barn. “We could sit in there.”

  “All right,” she said, leading the way, following the beam of light as Trevor pushed the door open. The Becks’ barn was mostly empty. Rose knew Lila and Zane wanted to raise a couple of calves and some chickens, but currently the family had no animals. There were a few bales of hay, probably from when Zane kept Billie there for a short time.

  There was a bench in front of one of the stalls. Trevor pointed toward it. Rose sat down, and Trevor sat next to her, on the far side of the bench. She scooted a little closer to him before she considered what she was doing. She stopped. It was one thing to flirt with him but another to be too forward. She’d never acted so un-Plain in all of her life.

  “Do you think Zane is doing all right?” Trevor asked. “I’m worried about him.”

  “Oh?” Rose hadn’t really given Zane much thought.

  “He’s upset about the other driver. And the deputy that questioned Lila. He’s afraid the insurance company is going to get out of paying.”

  “Doesn’t it take a while for those things to get settled?”

  “Sure,” Trevor said.

  “It hasn’t been very long.”

  “True.” Trevor placed his cell phone, the flashlight beam shooting upward, between them. “Zane always seemed so calm and level-headed in the Army. He seems like a loose cannon now.”

  “What do you mean?”

  Trevor shook his head. “I probably shouldn’t say anything. . . .”

  Rose leaned a little closer. “What happened?”

  Trevor didn’t answer right away, but then he said, “I think he feels helpless. Like there’s not a lot he can do to help Lila.”

  “Oh,” Rose answered. There really wasn’t much he could do. He couldn’t dress her or sponge bathe her or spend the night with her. She didn’t want to talk about Lila and Zane, but she wasn’t going to tell Trevor that.

  He sighed. “I can understand being frustrated about not being able to help someone you really care about.”

  “Oh?” Rose said again, but this time in a teasing way.

  He turned toward her, his eyes serious. “I’d care about you in a split second, if you weren’t Amish. As it is I can’t risk the wrath of your father. He seems pretty formidable.”

  Rose wasn’t sure what to say. Dat wasn’t anyone to make mad—that was for sure. Trevor picked up his phone and held it in his hand, partially blocking the light. Rose placed her hands in her lap and stared at him. His face was in the shadows, but he was still looking at her.

  “Jah,” she finally said. “We definitely come from different worlds.” And that was fine. She certainly didn’t want anything from him, except some fun.

  As he turned his body toward her, she leaned forward. He put his hand on her shoulder gently, then scooted closer. When his lips met hers, she wondered if perhaps she was only fooling herself. Perhaps she did want more. It was as if something was exploding deep within her. She couldn’t help but think that Reuben kissing her would never feel like this.

  She scooted closer to Trevor until they were hugging as they kissed, each pulling the other closer. His mouth was warm and then open and tasted both sweet and spicy, just like his breath smelled. He’d been drinking something by the barn. He held her tighter and kissed her harder. But then he pulled away suddenly.

  “Wow,” he said, standing quickly. She looked up at him, afraid she’d offended him somehow. “Look,” he said. “I didn’t mean for that to happen.” He inhaled deeply and then exhaled, shining the light toward the door. “I’ll walk you back.”

  Confused, she followed him out the door.

  “You okay?” he asked as he walked with her around the barn.

  “Jah,” she answered. “I can walk the rest of the way alone.”

  “No,” he said. “I’ll see you safely there.” When they reached the porch, he put his hand on her shoulder.

  She turned her face up toward his, longing for him to kiss her again.

  Instead of guessing at her wish he said, “Look, I shouldn’t have kissed you like that. I’m sorry.”

  “Don’t be,” she said. “I didn’t mind. Not one bit.” She smiled up at him. None of her kisses with boys she went to school with had been like that. She hadn’t known a kiss could be so passionate. That she could feel so—

  “No, I am sorry,” he said. “I don’t want to take advantage of you. Of your innocence.”

  She shook her head, feeling a frown spread across her face. She’d rather have him kiss her than talk down to her. “Good night,” she said and then hurried to the door, her heart aching.

  As she entered the house, Lila ca
lled out her name.

  “Jah,” she said. “I’m here.”

  “Gut,” her sister answered. “I can sleep now.” Rose wasn’t used to Lila being dependent on her. That in itself was unsettling.

  But what was most unsettling was the way Trevor’s kiss had made her feel. For a moment, she thought of Reuben and a wave of guilt washed over her. No, she’d ignore that. Trevor wouldn’t kiss her again. She’d pretend it never happened. Nothing would change between her and Reuben. The only thing that had changed was that she’d caught a glimpse of what she’d wanted before she’d set her sights on Reuben, before she’d joined the church. Jah, it had probably been a mistake to do both so young. She definitely should have done a little more running around before it was too late.

  Rose didn’t see Trevor for the next couple of days. She knew he picked Zane up and then dropped him off after work, but he wasn’t coming into the little house. He was probably avoiding her on purpose. She didn’t blame him. He was probably afraid Rose had fallen for him. She wouldn’t embarrass herself. She’d play it cool when she did see him, wouldn’t give it away that she was thinking about him every waking moment.

  Finally, on the third day, as Rose helped Lila from the recliner to the bed, she asked her sister what she knew about Trevor.

  “He’s from Delaware,” she said.

  Rose knew that.

  “It seems he had a girlfriend.”

  Rose nodded. He’d told her that.

  “Zane thinks he regrets breaking up with her—or maybe that they’re not entirely broken up.”

  Rose hadn’t gathered that from what Trevor had said before. Her face grew warm. No wonder he’d immediately regretted kissing her. She should have gone to the singing with Reuben on Sunday evening instead of sneaking out to see Trevor.

  “It’s time for me to go get Trudy,” Rose said. “Are you all right? Or should I go get Shani?”

  “I’m fine,” Lila said. “I’ll sleep while you’re gone.”

  Rose had parked the buggy outside Joel and Shani’s barn after she took Trudy to school that morning and had put the horse in a stall. She’d brought over a bale of hay and spread it on the floor. As she led the horse out, past the bench she and Trevor had sat on, she couldn’t help but remember their kiss.