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Complete Plays, The

Page 331

by William Shakespeare


  Bianca

  Ay, but not frighted me; therefore I’ll sleep again.

  Petruchio

  Nay, that you shall not: since you have begun,

  Have at you for a bitter jest or two!

  Bianca

  Am I your bird? I mean to shift my bush;

  And then pursue me as you draw your bow.

  You are welcome all.

  Exeunt Bianca, Katharina, and Widow

  Petruchio

  She hath prevented me. Here, Signior Tranio.

  This bird you aim’d at, though you hit her not;

  Therefore a health to all that shot and miss’d.

  Tranio

  O, sir, Lucentio slipp’d me like his greyhound,

  Which runs himself and catches for his master.

  Petruchio

  A good swift simile, but something currish.

  Tranio

  ’Tis well, sir, that you hunted for yourself:

  ’Tis thought your deer does hold you at a bay.

  Baptista

  O ho, Petruchio! Tranio hits you now.

  Lucentio

  I thank thee for that gird, good Tranio.

  Hortensio

  Confess, confess, hath he not hit you here?

  Petruchio

  A’ has a little gall’d me, I confess;

  And, as the jest did glance away from me,

  ’Tis ten to one it maim’d you two outright.

  Baptista

  Now, in good sadness, son Petruchio,

  I think thou hast the veriest shrew of all.

  Petruchio

  Well, I say no: and therefore for assurance

  Let’s each one send unto his wife;

  And he whose wife is most obedient

  To come at first when he doth send for her,

  Shall win the wager which we will propose.

  Hortensio

  Content. What is the wager?

  Lucentio

  Twenty crowns.

  Petruchio

  Twenty crowns!

  I’ll venture so much of my hawk or hound,

  But twenty times so much upon my wife.

  Lucentio

  A hundred then.

  Hortensio

  Content.

  Petruchio

  A match! ’tis done.

  Hortensio

  Who shall begin?

  Lucentio

  That will I.

  Go, Biondello, bid your mistress come to me.

  Biondello

  I go.

  Exit

  Baptista

  Son, I’ll be your half, Bianca comes.

  Lucentio

  I’ll have no halves; I’ll bear it all myself.

  Re-enter Biondello

  How now! what news?

  Biondello

  Sir, my mistress sends you word

  That she is busy and she cannot come.

  Petruchio

  How! she is busy and she cannot come!

  Is that an answer?

  Gremio

  Ay, and a kind one too:

  Pray God, sir, your wife send you not a worse.

  Petruchio

  I hope better.

  Hortensio

  Sirrah Biondello, go and entreat my wife

  To come to me forthwith.

  Exit Biondello

  Petruchio

  O, ho! entreat her!

  Nay, then she must needs come.

  Hortensio

  I am afraid, sir,

  Do what you can, yours will not be entreated.

  Re-enter Biondello

  Now, where’s my wife?

  Biondello

  She says you have some goodly jest in hand:

  She will not come: she bids you come to her.

  Petruchio

  Worse and worse; she will not come! O vile,

  Intolerable, not to be endured!

  Sirrah Grumio, go to your mistress;

  Say, I command her to come to me.

  Exit Grumio

  Hortensio

  I know her answer.

  Petruchio

  What?

  Hortensio

  She will not.

  Petruchio

  The fouler fortune mine, and there an end.

  Baptista

  Now, by my holidame, here comes Katharina!

  Re-enter Katharina

  Katharina

  What is your will, sir, that you send for me?

  Petruchio

  Where is your sister, and Hortensio’s wife?

  Katharina

  They sit conferring by the parlor fire.

  Petruchio

  Go fetch them hither: if they deny to come.

  Swinge me them soundly forth unto their husbands:

  Away, I say, and bring them hither straight.

  Exit Katharina

  Lucentio

  Here is a wonder, if you talk of a wonder.

  Hortensio

  And so it is: I wonder what it bodes.

  Petruchio

  Marry, peace it bodes, and love and quiet life,

  And awful rule and right supremacy;

  And, to be short, what not, that’s sweet and happy?

  Baptista

  Now, fair befal thee, good Petruchio!

  The wager thou hast won; and I will add

  Unto their losses twenty thousand crowns;

  Another dowry to another daughter,

  For she is changed, as she had never been.

  Petruchio

  Nay, I will win my wager better yet

  And show more sign of her obedience,

  Her new-built virtue and obedience.

  See where she comes and brings your froward wives

  As prisoners to her womanly persuasion.

  Re-enter Katharina, with Bianca and Widow

  Katharina, that cap of yours becomes you not:

  Off with that bauble, throw it under-foot.

  Widow

  Lord, let me never have a cause to sigh,

  Till I be brought to such a silly pass!

  Bianca

  Fie! what a foolish duty call you this?

  Lucentio

  I would your duty were as foolish too:

  The wisdom of your duty, fair Bianca,

  Hath cost me an hundred crowns since supper-time.

  Bianca

  The more fool you, for laying on my duty.

  Petruchio

  Katharina, I charge thee, tell these headstrong women

  What duty they do owe their lords and husbands.

  Widow

  Come, come, you’re mocking: we will have no telling.

  Petruchio

  Come on, I say; and first begin with her.

  Widow

  She shall not.

  Petruchio

  I say she shall: and first begin with her.

  Katharina

  Fie, fie! unknit that threatening unkind brow,

  And dart not scornful glances from those eyes,

  To wound thy lord, thy king, thy governor:

  It blots thy beauty as frosts do bite the meads,

  Confounds thy fame as whirlwinds shake fair buds,

  And in no sense is meet or amiable.

  A woman moved is like a fountain troubled,

  Muddy, ill-seeming, thick, bereft of beauty;

  And while it is so, none so dry or thirsty

  Will deign to sip or touch one drop of it.

  Thy husband is thy lord, thy life, thy keeper,

  Thy head, thy sovereign; one that cares for thee,

  And for thy maintenance commits his body

  To painful labour both by sea and land,

  To watch the night in storms, the day in cold,

  Whilst thou liest warm at home, secure and safe;

  And craves no other tribute at thy hands

  But love, fair looks and true obedience;

  Too little payment for so great a debt.

  Such duty as t
he subject owes the prince

  Even such a woman oweth to her husband;

  And when she is froward, peevish, sullen, sour,

  And not obedient to his honest will,

  What is she but a foul contending rebel

  And graceless traitor to her loving lord?

  I am ashamed that women are so simple

  To offer war where they should kneel for peace;

  Or seek for rule, supremacy and sway,

  When they are bound to serve, love and obey.

  Why are our bodies soft and weak and smooth,

  Unapt to toil and trouble in the world,

  But that our soft conditions and our hearts

  Should well agree with our external parts?

  Come, come, you froward and unable worms!

  My mind hath been as big as one of yours,

  My heart as great, my reason haply more,

  To bandy word for word and frown for frown;

  But now I see our lances are but straws,

  Our strength as weak, our weakness past compare,

  That seeming to be most which we indeed least are.

  Then vail your stomachs, for it is no boot,

  And place your hands below your husband’s foot:

  In token of which duty, if he please,

  My hand is ready; may it do him ease.

  Petruchio

  Why, there’s a wench! Come on, and kiss me, Kate.

  Lucentio

  Well, go thy ways, old lad; for thou shalt ha’t.

  Vincentio

  ’Tis a good hearing when children are toward.

  Lucentio

  But a harsh hearing when women are froward.

  Petruchio

  Come, Kate, we’ll to bed.

  We three are married, but you two are sped.

  To Lucentio

  ’Twas I won the wager, though you hit the white;

  And, being a winner, God give you good night!

  Exeunt Petruchio and Katharina

  Hortensio

  Now, go thy ways; thou hast tamed a curst shrew.

  Lucentio

  ’Tis a wonder, by your leave, she will be tamed so.

  Exeunt

  Twelfth Night

  or, What You Will

  TABLE OF CONTENTS

  CHARACTERS OF THE PLAY

  ACT I

  SCENE I. DUKE ORSINO’S PALACE.

  SCENE II. THE SEA-COAST.

  SCENE III. OLIVIA’S HOUSE.

  SCENE IV. DUKE ORSINO’S PALACE.

  SCENE V. OLIVIA’S HOUSE.

  ACT II

  SCENE I. THE SEA-COAST.

  SCENE II. A STREET.

  SCENE III. OLIVIA’S HOUSE.

  SCENE IV. DUKE ORSINO’S PALACE.

  SCENE V. OLIVIA’S GARDEN.

  ACT III

  SCENE I. OLIVIA’S GARDEN.

  SCENE II. OLIVIA’S HOUSE.

  SCENE III. A STREET.

  SCENE IV. OLIVIA’S GARDEN.

  ACT IV

  SCENE I. BEFORE OLIVIA’S HOUSE.

  SCENE II. OLIVIA’S HOUSE.

  SCENE III. OLIVIA’S GARDEN.

  ACT V

  SCENE I. BEFORE OLIVIA’S HOUSE.

  CHARACTERS OF THE PLAY

  Orsino, Duke of Illyria.

  Sebastian, brother to Viola.

  Antonio, a sea captain, friend to Sebastian.

  A Sea Captain, friend to Viola.

  Valentine and Curio, gentlemen attending on the Duke.

  Sir Toby Belch, uncle to Olivia.

  Sir Andrew Aguecheek.

  Malvolio, steward to Olivia.

  Fabian and Feste, a Clown, servants to Olivia.

  Olivia.

  Viola.

  Maria, Olivia's woman.

  Lords, Priests, Sailors, Officers, Musicians, and other Attendants.

  Scene: A city in Illyria, and the sea-coast near it.

  ACT I

  SCENE I. DUKE ORSINO’S PALACE.

  Enter Duke Orsino, Curio, and other Lords; Musicians attending

  Duke Orsino

  If music be the food of love, play on;

  Give me excess of it, that, surfeiting,

  The appetite may sicken, and so die.

  That strain again! it had a dying fall:

  O, it came o’er my ear like the sweet sound,

  That breathes upon a bank of violets,

  Stealing and giving odour! Enough; no more:

  ’Tis not so sweet now as it was before.

  O spirit of love! how quick and fresh art thou,

  That, notwithstanding thy capacity

  Receiveth as the sea, nought enters there,

  Of what validity and pitch soe’er,

  But falls into abatement and low price,

  Even in a minute: so full of shapes is fancy

  That it alone is high fantastical.

  Curio

  Will you go hunt, my lord?

  Duke Orsino

  What, Curio?

  Curio

  The hart.

  Duke Orsino

  Why, so I do, the noblest that I have:

  O, when mine eyes did see Olivia first,

  Methought she purged the air of pestilence!

  That instant was I turn’d into a hart;

  And my desires, like fell and cruel hounds,

  E’er since pursue me.

  Enter Valentine

  How now! what news from her?

  Valentine

  So please my lord, I might not be admitted;

  But from her handmaid do return this answer:

  The element itself, till seven years’ heat,

  Shall not behold her face at ample view;

  But, like a cloistress, she will veiled walk

  And water once a day her chamber round

  With eye-offending brine: all this to season

  A brother’s dead love, which she would keep fresh

  And lasting in her sad remembrance.

  Duke Orsino

  O, she that hath a heart of that fine frame

  To pay this debt of love but to a brother,

  How will she love, when the rich golden shaft

  Hath kill’d the flock of all affections else

  That live in her; when liver, brain and heart,

  These sovereign thrones, are all supplied, and fill’d

  Her sweet perfections with one self king!

  Away before me to sweet beds of flowers:

  Love-thoughts lie rich when canopied with bowers.

  Exeunt

  SCENE II. THE SEA-COAST.

  Enter Viola, a Captain, and Sailors

  Viola

  What country, friends, is this?

  Captain

  This is Illyria, lady.

  Viola

  And what should I do in Illyria?

  My brother he is in Elysium.

  Perchance he is not drown’d: what think you, sailors?

  Captain

  It is perchance that you yourself were saved.

  Viola

  O my poor brother! and so perchance may he be.

  Captain

  True, madam: and, to comfort you with chance,

  Assure yourself, after our ship did split,

  When you and those poor number saved with you

  Hung on our driving boat, I saw your brother,

  Most provident in peril, bind himself,

  Courage and hope both teaching him the practise,

  To a strong mast that lived upon the sea;

  Where, like Arion on the dolphin’s back,

  I saw him hold acquaintance with the waves

  So long as I could see.

  Viola

  For saying so, there’s gold:

  Mine own escape unfoldeth to my hope,

  Whereto thy speech serves for authority,

  The like of him. Know’st thou this country?

  Captain

  Ay, madam, well; for I was bred and born

  Not three
hours’ travel from this very place.

  Viola

  Who governs here?

  Captain

  A noble duke, in nature as in name.

  Viola

  What is the name?

  Captain

  Orsino.

  Viola

  Orsino! I have heard my father name him:

  He was a bachelor then.

  Captain

  And so is now, or was so very late;

  For but a month ago I went from hence,

  And then ’twas fresh in murmur,— as, you know,

  What great ones do the less will prattle of,—

  That he did seek the love of fair Olivia.

  Viola

  What’s she?

  Captain

  A virtuous maid, the daughter of a count

  That died some twelvemonth since, then leaving her

  In the protection of his son, her brother,

  Who shortly also died: for whose dear love,

  They say, she hath abjured the company

  And sight of men.

  Viola

  O that I served that lady

  And might not be delivered to the world,

  Till I had made mine own occasion mellow,

  What my estate is!

  Captain

  That were hard to compass;

  Because she will admit no kind of suit,

  No, not the duke’s.

  Viola

  There is a fair behavior in thee, captain;

  And though that nature with a beauteous wall

  Doth oft close in pollution, yet of thee

  I will believe thou hast a mind that suits

  With this thy fair and outward character.

  I prithee, and I’ll pay thee bounteously,

  Conceal me what I am, and be my aid

  For such disguise as haply shall become

  The form of my intent. I’ll serve this duke:

  Thou shall present me as an eunuch to him:

  It may be worth thy pains; for I can sing

  And speak to him in many sorts of music

  That will allow me very worth his service.

  What else may hap to time I will commit;

  Only shape thou thy silence to my wit.

  Captain

  Be you his eunuch, and your mute I’ll be:

  When my tongue blabs, then let mine eyes not see.

  Viola

  I thank thee: lead me on.

  Exeunt

  SCENE III. OLIVIA’S HOUSE.

  Enter Sir Toby Belch and Maria

  Sir Toby Belch

  What a plague means my niece, to take the death of her brother thus? I am sure care’s an enemy to life.

  Maria

  By my troth, Sir Toby, you must come in earlier o’ nights: your cousin, my lady, takes great exceptions to your ill hours.

  Sir Toby Belch

  Why, let her except, before excepted.

  Maria

  Ay, but you must confine yourself within the modest limits of order.

 

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