Winter's Wrath: Sacrifice (Winter's Saga #3)

by Karen Luellen

  “Why did I risk trying to bring you back? I’ll tell you why, Cole Andrews, because I can’t have everyone I love die all around me, and just sit back and watch it happen!”

  Cole was watching Meg’s face now with a mixture of emotions dancing across his soft green eyes.

  So caught up in her emotional storm, she couldn’t sense him, so it was a complete surprise when he reached out and gently pulled her into his wide chest. His strong arms were shaking as he wrapped them around her. Shocked, Meg held rigid still for a moment, surrounded by his massive body, his warm scent enveloping her senses, his strong heartbeat pounding against her cheek.

  Then she melted.

  This was her Cole. This was the boy who shared his family’s home in Kansas with her, gave her quiet moments of laughter even as they were hunted, took care of her traumatized mother, cared for sick children at his dad’s hospital and stayed by her side to fight those who sought to harm her and her family—making her enemies his own.

  Then, in what could have been his final act of devotion, he tried to become the fighter he thought she needed. All of this Meg knew with her whole heart, and the sunlight hit her eyes for the first time.

  Cole.

  Cole would accept her no matter what, faults, enemies, uncertainties—all of it.

  His rough stubble scratched her temple, as he leaned down, wrapping his tall, handsome body protectively around Meg. She could feel his warm breath on her eyelashes. “You have every right to be furious with me. I never wanted to leave you, Meg.” He breathed deeply and she could hear his lungs fill with air. “I only want to be with you. Just tell me what to do to make it right. Anything. I’ll do anything for you.”

  Meg let her arms wrap around Cole’s wide back, and nuzzled her face into his chest, feeling a pull on her heart she hadn’t let herself acknowledge before. “Don’t ever put yourself in danger again.” She pouted against his shirt.

  Meg could sense the smile as it hit Cole’s face and heard it in his voice when he said, “I’ll make you a deal, Meg Winter. I won’t put myself in any more danger than you put yourself into.”

  She huffed.

  Cole chuckled a deep, handsome laugh.

  Chapter 17 Just a Girl

  Inside an hour, they had been cleared by the tower for takeoff and were making their ascent into the dark sky, heading even further east. Though they were crossing time zones faster than they could keep track, to their internal clocks, they had been up all night. The stress of all the events over the past few weeks was weighing heavily on everyone’s minds. They had taken seats throughout the cabin, and were quietly lost in their thoughts.

  Cole was sitting beside her, nodding off periodically. He didn’t want to leave her side since their talk. Truth be told, Meg wanted him right with her, too. She watched his profile in the dim light of the cabin. His head was tilted back against the headrest, jaw opened slightly; soft snores whispered rhythmically. His dark lashes stood in beautiful shadowed contrast against his light skin. She stared at his full pink lips, so perfectly formed and caught herself wondering what it would feel like to trace her finger around them.

  Blushing, Meg turned away from the object of her confusion and bit her lips together, as though chastising them for their naughty thoughts.

  Good grief, Meg! He may as well be your brother after all we’ve been through. What are you thinking?

  It was probably safer to look out her cabin window into the night sky, which is what she did with a sigh. She was tired, too, but sleep evaded her, so she allowed her thoughts to wander to her family.

  Alik had befriended Farrow during the flight, and Meg was glad for it. Farrow needed a friend, and Alik is such a gentle, constant. Meg knew Farrow had come a long way in her healing, but like Creed, Meg sensed Farrow had a desperate wish to feel worthy to be accepted into the family.

  She felt so sad for the two metahumans raised to think everything good had to be earned—that they weren’t enough to be loved and accepted just for who they were. Williams taught them their worthiness was directly equal to how perfectly they performed in the eyes of their superiors.

  Meg closed her eyes and quietly thanked God for her mother who gave up everything to save her and her brothers. If not for Margo, Meg would either be dead or raised in such violence and dysfunction that she would be as broken as Creed and Farrow. How many more were out there? How many souls were lost this very moment? What could she do about it?

  I’m just one girl.

  I’m not even a girl.

  I’m a mutated human.

  I was abandoned, unwanted as a baby.

  I was expendable.

  I was just a rodent in a room with a one-way mirror so cruel people in white lab coats could watch the torment they put me through.

  I was even branded like cattle.

  How was I going to do anything?

  I’m just one soul. Though it tears me up inside to know Williams is still hurting people, what can I do to stop him? What do you want me to do? Show me the way.”

  Meg waited, and opened her heart to be ready to receive wisdom or strength or something.

  But nothing happened.

  Instead, her ears popped as the plane changed altitudes.

  Well, she thought. I’ll just keep trying. Maybe you’ll make it clearer to me as I go.

  This flight was going to be three hours, so Meg leaned over and used Cole’s wide shoulder as a pillow. I may as well try to get some sleep.

  ***

  Meg woke thrashing.

  She was drowning in a pool of the blood spilled at the hands of Williams. Nondescript chunks of flesh brushed her skin, and she was screaming, flailing and fighting to swim, but her arms were as heavy as stone. She couldn’t breathe. Every time she screamed, the blood of the innocents slipped into her open mouth coating her tongue, gagging her.

  ***

  When Meg came fully awake, she was sobbing.

  “Meg? Are you okay?” It was Cole. She must have awakened him, too. He was rubbing his face, trying to figure out what was going on.

  Meg looked at him, wide-eyed and unrecognizing as the fog of the dream reached in to her waking world with boney fingers, calling her back into its clutches. She shook her head, trying to clear it. “Yeah, I’m okay, Cole,” Meg lied. “What time is it?”

  “What’s going on?” It was Evan. He had been resting with Maze in the seats behind them but was now hovering over his sister’s head, looking down at her with upside-down worry.

  “Meg was having another nightmare.” Cole kept watching her with a look of sincere concern on his handsome face.

  Meg scowled at him, and rubbed her eyes with her fists, trying to shake the rancid aftertaste of the dream.

  “Ev, what time is it?” she asked, changing the subject.

  Evan glanced at his watch. “Well, to your internal clock, it probably feels like four in the morning. We’ll be landing in about forty-five minutes.” He didn’t even try to hide his concern as he stared at her rumpled, sweaty clothes and still-wet face. He was still standing above her, assessing with his physician’s eye.

  Trying to redirect his attention, Meg started babbling. “I can’t wait to get out of these clothes and take a hot shower,” she yawned. “I could use a new toothbrush, too. Won’t it be nice to be back in Texas? Hawaii was lovely, but it was never home. I—”

  “Meg,” Evan interrupted, “I’ve wanted to talk to you, but I thought it important to let you sleep for a while first. Maybe I shouldn’t have waited.” Worry darkened the shadows across his youthful face. He scooted out of his seat and came around to stand next to her row.

  “Okay,” Meg said, trying inconspicuously to dry her cheeks of tears she hadn’t realized she’d cried in her sleep.

  It wasn’t working.

  “I need you to be honest with me. Tell me what happens to you when you use your evolved gift?”

  Meg stopped rubbing her eyes and felt her heart jump around erratically in her chest. “I’
ve already explained it to everyone.” She shrugged and tried to look very interested in adjusting the pillow behind her.

  “No, you haven’t. You’ve been very evasive. I don’t think you’re telling us everything at all. From what I’ve seen, it has a much more profound effect on you—a negative effect.” Evan’s stare was intense. Now she knew what a cell on a slide felt like when he zoomed in using his microscope to study it.

  “What do you want me to say, Evan?”

  “Stop being evasive, and start at the beginning. What happens when you begin the empath connection?”

  She rolled her eyes. Cole was sitting between Meg and Evan, quietly listening to the exchange.

  “What are you afraid to tell me?”

  “I’m not afraid of anything!” Meg snapped. Memories of the bloody nightmare still crisp and metallic on her tongue had her edgy.

  His brows rose. “You are afraid of something. What happened when you went into Williams’ psyche?”

  She couldn’t stop her body from shuddering.

  “Meg, you’re going to have to let us help you.”

  “You can’t.” She mumbled under her breath.

  “What do you mean?”

  “I mean you may be a brilliant scientist, Evan, but you can’t protect me from myself!” she blurted.

  He frowned. “What does that even mean?”

  Meg just shook her head, feeling fresh, hot tears slip down her cheeks. She smacked them away furiously.

  “You’re my sister, Meggie. I want to help you,” Evan said gently.

  “Meg, please talk to us,” Cole urged.

  She stayed quiet for a long time. The boys gave her time to think.

  “When I went into Creed’s emotions, I felt the blackness and could remove it from him. He said it felt like a warm, white blanket. I guess that’s a good visual to describe a completely emotional event. I wrap the blanket around the pain and blackness, gather the corners of the blanket to make a bundle, then I toss it into the sky with a prayer.

  “It worked fine with Creed. I mean, I didn’t know what I was doing, but it seemed to help him and…” Meg shifted in her seat—uncomfortable discussing such a private moment she shared with Creed, in front of Cole, “other than feeling dizzy, a little headache, and tired, I recovered from that without too much difficulty.”

  Evan sat quietly watching her as she spoke. Meg knew he didn’t want to interrupt, worried that if he did, she would stop talking entirely.

  “It was similar with Cole,” she nodded at him as he watched her talk. “Except with you being unconscious, I was working in more of a dreamscape. I threw my blanket out to try to find the pain I could collect away from your heart, but found more emotional memories.” She darted her eyes toward Cole feeling guilty, but knowing he had a right to be aware of what she was privy to when she was working inside his emotions.

  “Sorry, Cole. Please don’t think I was prying.” Meg looked up into his eyes hopefully.

  “Meg, you did what you had to do to bring me back. You weren’t prying. You were saving me.” He nodded encouraging her to go on with her story.

  She smiled weakly then continued. “Well, I found childhood memories connected to your mom. I used those to help me channel into the flicker of life I found in the darkness. I gathered some blackness and removed it, but it was different than my experience with Creed. This time, I woke exhausted, head pounding and had some blurry vision for a while. It was like my brain was having a hard time deciding through whose eyes to see the world, Cole’s or my own. Almost like vertigo, I guess. Pretty disorienting, really. I figured the more intense reaction was because I was deeper in Cole’s emotions for a longer period of time.”

  Meg stopped talking, choosing instead to chew on her bottom lip until she tasted blood.

  Evan was having none of it.

  “Okay, what about when you tried it with Williams?”

  She looked away entirely and stared out the oval window into a starry black sky, and imagined the brown patchwork quilt of Texas below.

  Meg had this overwhelming urge to hide. She wanted to curl up on the bottom of her closet and hide in the darkness; willing herself not to breathe so she wouldn’t make a sound. She just wanted to disappear.

  Without realizing she was doing it, Meg drew her knees up to her chin, curling up as she did when she was a little girl locked in that horrible room where Williams kept her trapped. Meg remembered staring at the drain in the floor. She was still afraid of it.

  What had slipped down those holes? Whose room was this before me?

  Her memory wasn’t nearly as acute as Alik’s, but she had lots of traumas branded as clearly in her memory as the infinite symbol was into her back.

  “Meg?” Evan was waiting patiently for her answer.

  Cole reached out and laid a warm hand on Meg’s arm.

  She looked over at her brother and thought, not for the first time how fortunate he was to have been rescued as a newborn. He had only been in the institute for a couple of weeks and had no memories of his time there. Meg quietly scolded herself for resenting his fortune.

  None of us had any choice in the matter. We were children, babies!

  As Meg looked into her brother’s honey eyes, she had to force herself not to lash out at him.

  Williams traumatized her. Meg wanted him dead. She wanted vengeance.

  “You have to know I would do anything for you not to have to know about what happened. I wish to God I never tried using my empath abilities on him. Do you understand what I’m saying to you?” She was desperate for Evan and Cole to understand, but terrified of their reaction, too.

  “What’s going on, guys?” Alik looked between his brother and sister, sensing something big was happening.

  “Ali, I’m glad you’re here. You may as well hear this, too,” Meg sighed, thankful she wouldn’t have to repeat her story to the brothers separately.

  Alik stood in the aisle, arms crossed, stern look on his face as he listened to Evan back up and tell how he awoke to Meg screaming in her sleep and finished with the descriptions of her evolved gift. Evan emphasized the concern he had for the physical toll it took on Meg.

  When he was done, Alik, Evan and Cole looked at her.

  “Meg?” Alik said softly. “We’re your brothers. Nothing you say will change how we see you or how we will do anything to protect you.”

  “And you know how I feel about you,” Cole said unabashedly. “Please let us help you, Meg.”

  She couldn’t help it. Her face started leaking, again.

  Meg’s brothers had seen her at her worst, most temperamental, angriest, weakest, broken, bleeding moments, and they still loved her. Those boys were her family. She had to remind herself if the roles were reversed, she would move heaven and hell to protect them, too.

  Meg could also sense Cole’s devotion to her.

  She sighed deeply and began.

  Meg began by telling them what she saw inside Williams’ mind. She told them about the vicious animal cruelty and the progression to the violence toward humans. Meg tried to control her nausea as she put into words the thrill Williams felt during his sadistic acts of depravity.

  Every few minutes she would glance at the boys, afraid she would sense judgment from them directed at her, but it never happened. She knew she didn’t do anything wrong. The actions Meg had witnessed inside Williams were his, not her own.

  But, the problem with her empath gift, or, the double-edged sword of it was that she felt everything so completely, so intensely, in her own mind. It felt as though she really had committed those heinous acts and felt an empathetic surge of Williams’ arousal from them. Meg felt changed, violated and altered by the evil she experienced in a way she should have never felt.

  So she told the boys everything.

  In the end, Meg even expressed her terror at being desensitized by all the death she had empathetically experienced. “Maybe that’s how I could kill the two metahumans on the motorcycles without even b
linking an eye back on the island.” She clenched her hands tightly and stared at them as if they belonged to someone else now that they had blood on them.

  “Meg, you were protecting your family. If you hadn’t taken out those two rabid dogs, they could have killed us all. I would have done the same thing,” Alik soothed. The look in his eyes was earnest.

  “As for the trauma you experienced, it’s no wonder you’re having nightmares. It’s a very common occurrence for those who suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder. The headaches, disorientation and exhaustion are worrisome, however.” Evan’s eyes were sincere.

  “They could be something you can control as you learn to wield your gift more accurately—then again, what if they get worse—like a pencil that gets used up every time it’s sharpened?” Alik offered.

  “Meg, I think you shouldn’t use your gift until we’ve had a chance to study it more closely. There are so many possibilities and variables,” Evan thought aloud.

  “What if your gift takes awhile to evolve and it’s not ready to be used yet?” Cole offered her a box of tissues.

  Meg hadn’t realized she was still crying she was so intent on listening to the boys’ assessment of her condition.

  “I agree with Evan. At this point, it’s too hazardous to your health.” Alik’s sky-blue eyes watched her carefully.

  “I have to try to find out what happened to Creed.” Meg muttered, softly—hoping that wouldn’t hurt Cole’s feelings, but knowing it still would.

  “I am not letting you dive back into the mind of that serial killer!” Alik’s voice was raspy with barely contained protective anger.

  “Meg, oh dear God, no!” Evan’s eyes were wide with fear.

  Cole was shaking his head, not out of anger, but dread. “Meg, no. You can’t do that to yourself.”

  She frowned and chewed her already swollen lip. Feeling cornered, she stood, stepped over Maze, who had joined them at the start of the conversation, passed Cole’s long legs and moved into the aisle. Hands on her hips, Meg paced three steps back and forth, still feeling like a trapped animal.