Roommates
Page 86
“We were just having dinner, if you’d like to join us,” Nell said, setting Naomi’s suitcase down.
“Oh, no I…I don’t want to impose,” Naomi said. She was feeling rather timid after the strange greeting she had just received.
“Nonsense,” Nell said. “You must be famished. I insist you join us.” She shot Daniel a look that clearly said we’ll talk later before heading into the kitchen and setting a place for Naomi.
A charged silence hung over the room as the three of them sat down around the table.
“We haven’t been properly introduced,” Nell said after a moment, extending her hand to Naomi. “My name is Nell.”
“Pleased to meet you,” Naomi said quietly, shaking Nell’s hand.
Silence once again fell over the room.
“If you’ll excuse me,” Naomi finally said, “I…I think I could use a breath of fresh air.” She stood up and let herself out the front door.
Nell turned to Daniel.
“What the hell?” she said. It was the only time that he could ever recall her swearing.
“I…I wrote her a letter. Like I told you I would.”
“And told her what exactly? Hi, nice to meet you, here’s a train ticket, why don’t you come out to California and we can get hitched?”
Daniel squirmed uncomfortably.
“Oh,” Nell said. “Oh no. You did didn’t you? What were you thinking?”
“Well,” he said defensively, “You did want me to find a wife.”
“What I wanted was for you to get to know someone and then maybe marry them. I never meant for you to send some strange woman a train ticket!” she hissed.
“I know, I know,” he said, squeezing his eyes shut and pinching the bridge of his nose. “I never thought she’s take me seriously. Who just jumps on a train to go and marry someone they never met?” Nell stared at him.
“Why did you even send her a ticket in the first place?”
“I don’t know,” he said. “I don’t know. It seemed like the thing to do at the time.”
“Unbelievable,” Nell said.
“I’ll set it right,” he said, standing up. “I’ll go and tell her that this was all a big misunderstanding. I’ll get her a train ticket home in the morning.”
Nell smacked him hard in the chest.
“You’ll do no such thing! You dragged that girl all the way across the country, you are not going to just stick her on the next train back just because it suits you!”
“Well, what do you suggest I do then?” Daniel shot back at her.
“Honestly? I suggest you marry the girl.”
Daniel stared at her for a long moment.
“You’re serious,” he said disbelievingly.
“You bet your boots I’m serious,” Nell replied. Daniel shook his head.
“I can’t think about this right now. I’ll put her up at the inn in town and we’ll figure this out tomorrow.”
“I think she’s travelled quite far enough for you already,” Nell said. “She’s staying here with us.”
Daniel threw his hands up in defeat.
“Fine,” he said.
He went to his room to collect his thoughts and left Nell to go talk to Naomi. The more he thought about it, the more he thought that maybe he should take Nell’s advice. It might be nice to finally have a wife by his side again.
He could do worse, he supposed. Naomi was a beautiful woman and she seemed to have a sweet demeanor.
And besides, anything was better than going back to the way he had been living after Catherine had left. Maybe it was time he moved on.
*****
Nell found Naomi standing on the beach, looking out over the waves. The sun had set, but the moon was full and it reflected off the waves like silver.
“Are you alright?” Nell asked. Naomi shrugged.
“I suppose so,” she said.
“I’m sorry about the way my brother acted tonight,” Nell said.
“He doesn’t seem too happy that I’m here,” Naomi replied. “It was a mistake to come.”
“No, he was just…surprised,” Nell said.
“Surprised isn’t what I’d call it,” Naomi said drily. She supposed that she had no right to be offended, considering the circumstances that had brought her here.
“He can come off as a bit…I don’t know. Abrupt, I suppose. And blunt. You get used to it,” Nell told her.
Naomi made no reply.
“Will you come inside?” Nell asked.
“I suppose I might as well. Don’t know what else I would do,” Naomi said with a wry smile.
Nell insisted that she eat, for which Naomi was grateful. She hadn’t realized how hungry she was. Then Nell showed her where to wash up. Naomi was glad to wash off the all the grime. Travelling was dirty work it seemed. Finally Nell showed her to where she would be sleeping for the night. Naomi was glad to finally have a comfortable place to sleep. Her trip had been a long and exhausting one.
Chapter 4
The following morning Nell fixed coffee for all of them and they sat in silence drinking it, none of them sure what to say.
“So,” Daniel finally said. “You really want to get married?” The question caught Naomi off guard.
“I…yes,” she replied.
“Well, let’s go then. There’s a justice of the peace in town.” Naomi blinked in surprise.
“Oh. I… alright then. Let’s go.”
Nell smiled a small smile as she took another drink of her coffee.
*****
The ceremony was over almost before Naomi even knew what happened. She was glad, in a way. She had been close to backing out. Now it was done, and there was no going back. She tried not to think of the rush she had felt when she and Daniel had shared their first kiss as man and wife. Well, their first kiss at all, she realized.
But it wouldn’t do for her to start thinking that way. She was here for Faith, she reminded herself.
Nell had departed the day of the wedding, saying that she wanted to give the newlyweds their privacy. Naomi had felt a pang of guilt as Nell had kissed her on the cheek and welcomed her to the family with a smile before boarding her train.
She had been nervous about the wedding night, sure that her new husband would want to consummate their marriage. It was something that she had been steeling herself for since she had first considered becoming a mail order bride. But Daniel had not made any advances toward her at all.
He seemed almost as unsure in the relationship as she was. It was, for all intents and purposes, as though they were sharing a bed simply because that was what married couples were supposed to do. They invariably turned their backs to each other each night before going to sleep.
Sometimes, Daniel would roll over in his sleep and drape his arm over her, waking her up. Her first instinct was always to snuggle in closer to him. But it seemed wrong to take comfort in his arms knowing why she had entered the marriage. She would roll away from him and drift back to sleep, guilt hanging heavy over her head.
During the day she busied herself with the tasks of the household and tried not to notice the tender way that he had begun to look at her when he didn’t think she was watching.
*****
They had just finished breakfast one morning and Daniel sat reading the newspaper. Naomi was working up the nerve to ask him for money. She hated to do it. But she had received a letter from Matthew. Faith was still getting worse. She would die soon if she didn’t receive the care she needed.
“I was wondering…” she began. Daniel lowered his paper.
“Yes?” he prompted her when she didn’t continue.
“I was wondering if I could have some money. For shopping.” The words came out in a rush. Daniel looked at her strangely and she braced herself for him to tell her no.
“Is that all?” he said. “You had me worried there for a second. Of course. Take whatever you need.”
Naomi blinked.
“Thank you,” she said, relieved.
Conflicting emotions raged inside her as she made her way back to the house on the beach. She was glad that she had finally found a way to help Faith. But guilt gnawed at her relentlessly. It worsened as Daniel smiled at her when she walked through the door.
“Didn’t find what you needed?” he asked her.
“Hmm?”
“I thought you went shopping,” he said. “Could you not find what you needed?”
“Oh. I…no, couldn’t find it.”
“That’s ok,” he said. “Maybe next time. I’ll come with you next time and show you around. Granted, I probably don’t know the town much better than you do. But maybe I can help you find what you were looking for.”
“That would be nice,” Naomi said, forcing a smile.
She was afraid for a moment that he would ask her to give the money back, since she hadn’t bought anything with it. But he didn’t mention it.
*****
Over the next several months Naomi continued to make weekly “shopping trips”, but she was careful to always buy something before returning. Her guilt had become almost too great to bear. But she couldn’t stop. Letters from Matthew assured her that Faith was now getting stronger, and might even make a full recovery. She didn’t dare stop.
One week, when she returned home, Daniel was waiting for her with a bouquet of wildflowers. Her heart almost couldn’t stand it.
“Here,” he said, offering her the flowers. He seemed, for all the world, more like a hopeful school boy than her husband.
She couldn’t force herself to take them. She didn’t deserve them. He lowered them awkwardly after a moment.
“Will you walk with me?” he asked after a moment.
Naomi nodded wordlessly, setting down the bundle that she had brought back from town. She followed Daniel and fell into step beside him as he walked along the beach. After a moment, he reached down and took her hand, keeping his eyes straight ahead as they walked together.
Naomi fought down the lump in her throat and tears stung her eyes. Why couldn’t he have been someone cruel, someone that she couldn’t have grown to love? And she did love him, she realized. She loved him and she would not lie to him anymore.
“Stop,” she said, pulling her hand from his. “Stop. I can’t do this anymore. Daniel, I have to tell you the truth. I came here to marry you for your money. I didn’t know what else to do. My sister – I have a sister back home, and a brother – my sister, she was sick. She was dying. I worked as hard as I could, but it wasn’t enough. I couldn’t get enough money for her treatments. I was desperate. I’ve been taking money from you and sending it to them every week. I’m so sorry. I know it doesn’t change what I did or make it ok, but I’m so, so sorry.”
Daniel hung his head and closed his eyes.
“I know,” he said hoarsely. “I saw the letters.”
Naomi was speechless.
“I know now that you didn’t come here for a marriage,” Daniel continued. “And I know now that you probably never considered loving me to be a possibility, I just… I don’t know. I guess I hoped that I could change your mind.”
He pressed the flowers into her hand. She stood in stunned silence as she watched him walk away. When she found her voice again she called after him.
“Daniel! Daniel, wait!”
He stopped and turned to face her.
“You did change my mind,” she said to him. “A long time ago.”
“Do you mean that?” he asked.
“I do,” she said. “Can you ever forgive me?”
“I do,” he said with a smile.
Naomi caught up to him and laced her fingers through his and they walked up the hill to the house together.
Anna’s Calling
Chapter 1
Anna could not believe this was happening again! How could God let this happen to her? Wasn’t once enough? As she stared into her new husband’s face, willing him to wake from unconsciousness even as he burned up from fever, she felt his faint heartbeat and saw the increasingly shallow rise and fall of his chest.
“Oh, God!” she cried out silently, "Please... please do not take Matthew from me...” She laid her head on his chest and sobbed uncontrollably; suddenly all her fears and reservations about coming West were being fulfilled. She heard her Aunt Jolene’s criticism from over four months earlier when Anna decided to leave Boston to answer a call for a mail order bride. She remembered it so clearly.
Chapter 2
Aunt Jolene had taken Anna in when Anna’s young husband Jake was lost at sea. He had been Anna’s whole world, the only relation besides her aunt, but he had loved her and understood her so much better than anyone ever could. Jake had helped Anna finish her schooling, which had been hard with her uncanny ability to switch letters and numbers into a completely incomprehensible mess of symbols.
Every time through her early teens, when Anna was ready to quit going back to the city school on the outskirts of Boston, it was Jake who had pushed her and helped her work through all the assignments. He had been so proud when she was able to graduate with him. She had felt so loved that day, even more so when he presented her with a tiny silver band as he asked her to marry him before he started his new job on one of the big fishing fleets that fished up and down the eastern coastline. It never crossed her mind that the boy who grew into a man, a friend who had become her husband, would leave only three days after their wedding and never come home to her.
When his ship was lost at sea, Anna felt like her world had come to an end. It was only her faith that God was still with her, even in the saddest time of her life, that kept her going. She tried to maintain the small upstairs room she shared with Jake with her little income from tailoring clothes and occasionally helping the midwife, but after a month, her landlady told her she needed the room for a young family who could pay the whole rent. So Anna was forced to move back to Aunt Jolene’s home.
It did not take Anna long to realize she could not stay there. Aunt Jolene meant well, but she was domineering and always thought she knew what was best for Anna. In most cases, Aunt Jolene and Jake had completely different opinions on Anna’s limitations. Aunt Jolene always thought Anna would never finish school and would end up doing nothing more with her life than being barefoot and pregnant. Now that Jake was gone, Aunt Jolene was convinced Anna had no prospects. However, Anna could not shake the whisper in her heart that sounded so much like Jake, telling her to leave Boston, to dare to believe in a new life.
That was how she stumbled upon the newspaper ad requesting the services of a young woman to move west as a bride for a rancher. The ad had not said much, but it had caught Anna’s attention. She knew she needed to respond, and while she doubted she would ever love anyone after loving Jake, she knew that as a widow her chance of marrying was minimal, and unless she embraced a life as a spinster, her choices were severely limited. So she’d had her friend, Rosie, help her write a reply to the anonymous rancher, explaining that she was a widow, but she was a great cook, was able to manage a household, and was eager for a new life. Anna and Rosie prayed over the telegram before letting the clerk send it. It was the longest two days of Anna’s life waiting for the reply. She had not told her Aunt Jolene yet, but her aunt could see something was bothering Anna and continually interrogated her. When the telegram came late the second day, Aunt Jolene stood imperiously overseeing Anna as she stared hard at the telegram, some words clear to her, others needing her intense focus to make sense of. Finally, not asking her aunt for help, Anna asked the messenger to confirm what she thought it said: “Excellent. Exactly the type of help I need. Ticket purchased. One way. Leaves June 3. Will meet you in Denver. Matthew.”
Anna had quickly directed the messenger what to reply in return. When the messenger had left
, Anna had turned to see her Aunt scowling at her in distaste.
“So you have sold yourself to some stranger. Is that really what you think your God would want? Your precious God who took your precious Jake?” Aunt Jolene threw her hands up in the air in exasperation and stormed into the kitchen.
Anna remained by the door and stared at the slip of paper in her hand, suddenly terrified even as excitement started to build in stark contrast to her fears.
“Oh, Lord, your will be done,” she whispered.
Three days later, Anna left Rosie and Aunt Jolene while she took a train to St. Louis, and from there a stagecoach to Denver. The trip ended up taking five weeks, the stage portion being much longer than anticipated due to broken spokes, collapsing horses, and even the threat of an Indian ambush, which had actually been nothing more than a stand-off until the Indians lost interest in the stage and moved on.
Chapter 3
Matthew’s breathing stopped for a split second, causing Anna to sit up sharply. She placed her hands on both sides of Matthew’s face as she leaned close and pleaded with him, not knowing if he could hear her.
“Please don’t leave me, Matthew. Please don’t abandon me out here. Whatever shall I do?” The tears threatened to fall again, but as Matthew started breathing shallowly but steadily again, Anna heaved a huge sigh of relief. She glanced around the room. This was the bedroom they were supposed to share as husband and wife. Matthew had been so proud to show her the room, she remembered, and she thought back to their first awkward meeting.
Chapter 4
When the stagecoach had stopped in front of the saloon and inn in Denver, Anna stepped onto the loose dirt and shielded her eyes in the bright sun. She was not yet acclimated to the higher climate, so she felt strangely lightheaded. The bustle all around her as men helped unload the stage made her self-conscious. She took her single carpetbag from the hands of the coach and moved to the safety of the covered porch in front of the inn.