Kate, Finally

by Yeyet Soriano

  Jane, her younger sister, was the exact opposite. She was pro-Kate all the way, maybe because she could empathize. Jane was infatuated with Rob, as were most women/girls he encountered, and Jane could understand how Kate could have fallen head over heels in love with him. But even when Jane let Kate rant and rave about Rob and she commiserated, she also made it clear Rob was not wholly at fault. He never gave Kate any indication he would be able to commit to someone. The whole family, being Rob’s second family, knew how disillusioned Rob was about love—owing to the relationship between his own mother and father. They knew Rob was almost incapable of having a normal relationship because he always had in his mind the fear that he would be like his father, hurting his mother.

  Kate sighs. Of course, she didn’t tell her family the other things that happened between her and Rob. They would freak out and they might just distance themselves from Rob and he didn’t deserve that. Again, it was her fault for allowing Rob and her to reach that plane in their relationship. It was her fault that she allowed Rob to hurt her.

  When her mom leaves her alone, Kate stares again at her engagement ring. Rob had been true to his word. When she woke up the day after their engagement, he was right beside her, sleeping. They had breakfast together and spent the day together planning their wedding. They settled into a committed relationship, and it was all new for Kate, having Rob like this. They had set the date to exactly one year from the day of their engagement. One year. So many things to do!

  And no time to think about anything else. Or anyone else, for that matter.

  Seven years ago

  Nothing changed between them after that night Kate lost her virginity to Rob. They went back to their old rhythm. It was like that night was just a favor Rob bestowed on Kate because she asked.

  Rob remained unaffected. But Kate was shattered. She had lost Anton, and although she had one night with Rob, she realized that this just made her sink deeper into the hole of perverted love she had for her best friend who continually hurt her.

  Kate knew she was being stupid. She knew she had to escape. She knew she had to do something. But... she didn’t. She just continued being Rob’s friend and pined for him in secret.

  She tried dating other guys, but nothing ever worked out. Because... because Rob was always there, and he was always her priority.

  Kate knew she could not have a healthy relationship with another guy until she has flushed out Rob from her system completely. But she just couldn’t.

  Rob had also exercised his “rights” to call her when he needed her, and he always asked nicely too. And it was during one of those nights when the promise was discussed.

  “Hey, Katie, promise me something,” Rob said right after they had made love. They were tipsy with wine and still tangled in each other’s arms and legs in their full naked glory.

  “What?” Kate purred. She was happy. She was always happy when she had Rob to herself. She would feel down in the dumps the day after, but at that particular moment, she was happy.

  “When you turn thirty-five and we’re still both single, and there’s no one in our lives more worthy, we would get married,” Rob aid.

  Kate’s eyes grew wide.

  “What the—?!” She faced Rob. His hair was tousled and he was smiling his lazy half-smile.

  “You heard me. Agree?”

  “I...,” Kate didn’t know what to say. On the one hand, she was ecstatic—there was a chance she would end up with Rob! On the other hand, was this what she wanted? Was this the way it would be?

  “C’mon, Katie, admit it. We have something. We are so compatible in every way. We know each other’s deepest darkest secrets. We know each other’s strengths and weaknesses. We have sexual chemistry. Why can’t we make a go of it?”

  Katie wanted to cry. They had something. She loved him.

  She nodded.

  “Great, then it’s settled!”

  Kate counted in her head. It would be seven years before she turned thirty-five. She had been in love with Rob for longer than that. She could wait.

  I’m stupid, stupid, stupid, Kate thought.

  But she was happy.

  So screw it.

  Kate shakes her head at the memory. She had been young, stupid, and pathetically in love. And yet, here she was, about to marry the guy she was hopelessly in love with, who took her virginity without any remorse and who repeatedly hurt her. All because of a promise they made to each other while drunk and in lust.

  A sudden image of Layne’s smiling face comes to her mind, and she has to close her eyes to ward this off. But there it is, imprinted in her brain—the smile of a man who made her feel good, made her enjoy the simple things in life, without any complications, without any strings.

  But that’s the thing though. No strings. She isn’t getting any younger. And here is Rob, who she still dearly loves, offering her the commitment she had always craved for from him since the day they met. A Rob who seemed to have changed for the better.

  “Katie, are you okay?”

  Kate opens her eyes and looks up into the face of her father.

  Kate manages a smile. “I am more than okay, Dad.”

  “You better be, that rock costs a fortune!” Her dad points to the ring on her finger.

  Kate laughs. She stands and gives her dad a hug.

  “I hope you’re happy, Katie,” her dad whispers.

  “I am,” she whispers back, hoping her father believed her.

  “If Robbie hurts you, he’ll have me to deal with!”

  Kate laughs softly.

  Oh Daddy, if you only knew, you would have killed Rob long ago.

  4

  The Book

  “Kuya! Are you still working? It’s almost midnight! Or are you chatting with some woman?”

  Layne looks up from his laptop in the living room of his house, where he is finishing some revisions to the presentation he needed to make to a new client. Portia came from a birthday party of a friend of hers. From the flush on her face and the sound of her voice, she is a bit tipsy.

  “When have you known me to be chatting up some woman?” Layne asks, mocking frustration.

  Portia giggles, as she plops down on the living room couch. She is wearing tight black jeans, a dark emerald sleeveless blouse and black pumps. After a few seconds, she becomes serious. “Actually, Kuya, never. Which is weird. I know you’re not gay. I know you get a lot of action, if you know what I mean,” she smiles naughtily.

  “But you don’t have real girlfriends. I mean, you’ve never brought anyone over to introduce to us, and you don’t seem to go out on real dates. And... you don’t have any presence in social media! That is sooooo strange!”

  Layne smiles. He had resisted the pull of setting up any social media account—no Facebook, no Twitter, no Instagram, no nothing. He thought it was just a waste of time, plus, he just couldn’t be distracted, and couldn’t have any temptations to go into a deeper kind of relationship. He liked it that way. It meant he could focus on his family, and his career, which supported his loved ones. He did break that rule recently...

  “I’m serious Kuya. Are you putting your life on hold because of us?”

  “Where is this coming from?” Layne asks seriously.

  “I was just thinking. I don’t need to go to law school full time. I can start working. Ease off some of your load. I can then continue studying on a part-time basis. I am in no hurry.”

  “What happened? Too much pressure?”

  “No. I see you, Kuya. And I realize you’ve never lived,” Portia states, looking straight at him.

  “I have lived. I live,” Layne says, albeit pathetically. He can’t maintain eye contact.

  “Really? I’ve had four serious boyfriends and I’m ten years younger than you! Soph had two and even Gidge has had boylets left and right. But you... I don’t remember anyone.”

  Layne smiles sadly.

  “I’ve had girlets, lots of them,” Layne says smiling, as he uses the opposite of Por
tia’s term for the boy toy or boylets. “But never serious enough to introduce to you, guys.”

  “Have you ever been in love, Kuya?”

  Layne considers the question. He and Portia are close, regardless of the age gap. Layne doesn’t have really very close friends outside of his family, so Portia is the closest thing to a confidante he could have.

  “Would it be sad if I hadn’t?” he asks.

  “Yes, it would be sad. And it would also mean you are stopping yourself from falling because of us.”

  “No, don’t think that.”

  “I don’t have to. I know so.”

  “Stop, Portia. You’re drunk. And how did you get home, by the way? I hope you didn’t ride a cab by yourself or anything!” Layne goes on full older brother mode.

  “I am not drunk, and Michelle dropped me off, and no, before you even ask, she was our designated driver, so she hadn’t had anything to drink,” Portia says.

  Layne stays quiet, satisfied with the answer.

  “Kuya, please. Do us a favor. Don’t postpone your life because of us. I’m looking for a job tomorrow.”

  “Porsh...”

  “It’s my decision to make. I’m an adult.” Portia stands up, wavers a bit on her high heels, catches her balance, and stomps up to her room.

  Layne remains silent. Portia is all grown up. And she will indeed find a job, but she will continue to study. She always does what she says she would, even when she is tipsy.

  Strange though that she would talk about love. He has been thinking about it too. Why he never seemed to have fallen in love in the past. And he realizes he just never met the right girl before. Even Shan had never been the right girl, really.

  It has been a few weeks after Singapore, and he still feels sad... because he has met the right girl, and he just screwed it up.

  Layne feels a headache coming on. He massages his temples, although it doesn’t ease the discomfort. Plus, it brings on a swell of memories. Snippets of images of Kate, which leave him feeling the spectrum of emotions from happiness, to elation, to sadness, to regret, and to depression.

  He remembers her in Sydney, with her short hair, downing shot after shot, her face getting pinker and pinker, and her eyes becoming more and more playful.

  He remembers her in Vietnam caught in the middle of the street by the speeding motorbikes, then the way her face scrunches up while drinking the thick and strong Vietnamese coffee.

  He remembers her at the Great Wall of China, taking pictures with her clunky camera. He remembers the feel of her skin under his hands as he massages her sore muscles.

  One month after Layne’s China trip

  Layne’s sister Sophia was a voracious romance story reader, and she had just recently discovered local Filipino romance novels in English. She was gushing about a new story from a relatively new author she just bought entitled “Behind the Wall.”

  “Kuya, the guy in the cover looks a lot like you!” Soph gushed, staring at the book in her hand.

  Layne laughed. “What would I be doing in a romance story cover?”

  “You tell me...,” Sophia handed him the new book, and Layne looked at the cover.

  Flashes of the Great Wall encounter came back to Layne. Of Kate on her camera, of Kate taking pictures of everything, probably including him, looking out at the view from the Great Wall.

  “Shit,” he muttered.

  “I know, right? I didn’t know you could be romance novel material! And that there is another unfortunate soul who looks like you. I have to admit, the cover looks hot, but I do hope I don’t think of you when I read the book! Ha ha!”

  “You’re a strange girl, Soph!”

  “I am!” Sophia went up to her room and left the book in Layne’s hands.

  Behind the Wall. A novel by Kate Borromeo.

  Finally, I found her. Layne skimmed to the last page with the author details and found Kate’s social media information.

  He then broke his rule about social media and checked on her profile, and he just couldn’t stop.

  That’s where he found out about the details of her speaking engagement in a Mumbai writers’ conference. Although she did also drop this nugget during one of their conversations in China, she never did tell him the definite schedule; but her author profile did.

  He smiles at how he suddenly was lured into the world of social media because he wanted to see Kate again after China. He remembers her face as it lit up when she saw him and he gave her the bracelet in Mumbai. He remembers the night they spent together and how he realized at that moment he was already in love with her.

  He remembers the buffalo wings sauce at the side of her mouth at the SkyBar in KL, and how disappointed she looked by his inaction she had to get drunk.

  And of course he remembers Kate in her white dress in Singapore, and the way her face looked as she slept.

  Layne closes his eyes and smiles.

  Then he feels a sharp rap at the back of his neck. His eyes fly open.

  “Layney, daydreaming again?” Nina teases her firstborn.

  Layne raises a hand and strokes the back of his neck. His mother always does the sharp rap at the back of his neck as a sign of affection. She does it only when they were alone. She may be frail but she packs a punch.

  “No, ’Nay, just resting my eyes,” Layne says.

  “I know you, Layney. I know something is up with you. I’ve noticed it for a couple of months now. Sometimes you look so deliriously happy I am convinced you have finally found the love of your life. But sometimes you look so pensive and sad I am afraid you have lost that person even before you could explore a life together.”

  Layne stares at his mother with his mouth open.

  Nina playfully slaps Layne’s chin to close his mouth. “Surprised I could read you, huh?”

  Layne is silent.

  “Still not talking, are you?”

  Layne smiles sadly.

  “Fine, suit yourself, Layney. Let me just say that I am a woman, and I know how women think. I may not have made the greatest choices in life, but I have learned a lot from my experiences. If you need any advice, or even just to talk, I am here. And no topic is taboo, okay?”

  “No topic is taboo? Are you sure about that ’Nay?” Layne playfully says with a naughty smile.

  “Well, I don’t have to know all the details, Layney, but you get what I mean, right?”

  “I do, ’Nay,” Layne says with soft smile. He stands and hugs his petite mom and plants a kiss on top of her head.

  “I love you, Layney. I do hope you find your happiness someday.”

  “I have my happiness right here in this house.”

  “I know you think we are enough for you, but don’t kid yourself, you know we are not going to fulfill everything you need,” Nina says sadly.

  Layne stays silent.

  He thinks of Kate and how she makes his heart fill with happiness whenever they were together.

  “Okay ’Nay, I understand.”

  “And Layney?”

  “Yes?”

  “Once you find it, that happiness, don’t be too stupid as to let it slip through your fingers, okay? Or I’ll hit you upside of your head several times until you realize how really stupid that is!”

  Layne laughs loudly. But inwardly, he thinks, Ouch! ’Nay is always on target!

  Stupid, stupid, stupid!

  5

  The Confidante

  “Hey there, Kate, how are the wedding preparations going?”

  Kate looks up from reading a book and she is face to face with Rob’s mother. She gives the older woman a warm hug and a kiss. They had arranged to meet at a café in the middle of the afternoon to discuss the details of the wedding.

  Tessa Salcedo née Valenzuela, is a member of one of the oldest and richest real estate families in the Philippines. In her fifties, she still exuded the beauty and glamour she was famous for in her youth. She had a tumultuous romance with Ronald Salcedo, another member of an old rich family dealing
in shipping and other transportation businesses.

  The result, of course, is their only child, Robert Salcedo. Tessa and Ronnie obviously loved each other, but they were constantly fighting and constantly making up. Rob had confided in Kate that when he was young, the sight of his mother crying was usual, as was the sight of his father looking at his mother with so much love and sadness every time she cried.

  “Fine, Tita. The wedding coordinators you hired are doing such a good job that Rob and I just wait, and they do all the work,” Kate says with a giggle.

  Tessa suddenly looks into Kate’s eyes. “It’s good to finally see the two of you settled. I was afraid... I was afraid my son would be too stupid not to hold on to someone as special as you.”

  Kate blushes. “Tita...”

  “A lesser woman would’ve quit and left a long, long time ago, Kate.”

  Kate is silent, knowing she did think of quitting several times. “I know, Tita. But there’s something about your son I can’t seem to shake off completely.”

  Tessa smiles. “I’m glad he finally saw the light.”

  Kate is silent. A waiter arrives and takes Tessa’s order. Kate also asks for another coffee and a slice of apple pie.

  “Rob confides in me, you know. We are very close,” Tessa says, looking intently at Kate.

  Kate nods. “Yeah, he has always said you were his confidante.”

  “And I can read my son like an open book, so believe me when I say I may be the only other person who knows the extent of the struggles you went through because of your love for him.”

  Kate lowers her eyes. How much does Rob’s mom know?

  “I know there have been many times he disappointed you, Kate and he was always surprised why you didn’t leave his ass earlier.”

  Kate remains silent. Tessa’s espresso arrives and she takes a sip.