The Viscount in Her Bedroom

by Gayle Callen

  He didn’t remember, and he kept reminding himself not to squeeze her frail arm. He concentrated on every step, and to his relief, his cane found the top stair before his grandmother could even speak.

  “Oh dear,” Grandmama said, “that silly Margot is having everyone introduced like this is London. Try not to think too poorly of her, Simon.”

  A moment later, he understood her concern.

  “The Dowager Viscountess Wade and Viscount Wade.”

  The room fell to complete silence.

  Simon didn’t have to wonder who was looking at him, because they all were. Mumbled voices rose like the buzzing of insects.

  “So how many people are here?” he asked softly, keeping a pleasant expression on his face.

  “Perhaps forty,” she answered. “I am so sorry.”

  They waited while Georgie and Leo were introduced.

  “You have nothing to apologize for, Grandmama,” Simon continued. “Just guide me to the receiving line.”

  “Lady Wade, where would you like me to wait until you need me?”

  He was startled by Louisa’s voice. He’d been so caught up in his own misery, he’d forgotten she was right behind him.

  “I can stay with you, Grandmama,” Georgie said.

  “Oh no you don’t,” Leo said. “I’ll take my little sister off your hands, Grandmama. Come along, Georgie.”

  “Georgiana!” she said with a groan.

  “Leo,” Simon began in a warning voice.

  “Don’t worry, big brother,” Leo said. “I’ll never let Georgiana out of my sight.”

  “Leo!” Georgie said, exasperated.

  They continued to exchange heated whispers until their voices faded away.

  His grandmother said, “Miss Shelby, I could use your help right now. After we say hello to Margot—and it will take all I have not to berate her for her foolish announcements—I need to speak with another of my friends. You and Simon can wander the party for refreshments, if you don’t mind.”

  Softly, Louisa said, “If Lord Wade doesn’t mind.”

  He smothered the last of his self-pity and remembered that Louisa needed his help tonight, too. If she weren’t with him, she would sit in a corner with the companions and chaperones and old ladies, where lascivious men would look her over. She deserved more than that.

  Their hostess greeted Simon cheerfully, if a bit forcefully. She made sure to tell him that her granddaughter was almost engaged. He got the impression he was supposed to stay away from her, which was fine with him. He might forget houses, but he remembered women. When the granddaughter had visited him in London after his accident, she had shouted every answer, and had made it plain that she was only visiting because she’d been forced.

  When Louisa took over for his grandmother, there was an awkward silence as they began to move into the room. People greeted him in passing—some shouting, some sounding hesitant, as if he might not want to talk.

  Most of the time, conversations were awkward: the women didn’t seem to know what to say, and the men laughed too forcefully at any word out of Simon’s mouth. But Louisa was able to turn every conversation to something pleasant, and he found himself appreciating her thoughtfulness.

  When they left a couple behind, Simon leaned close to Louisa and whispered, “Find me a glass of anything, and then let’s stand in the corner somewhere—or even better, behind a palm.”

  She laughed softly, and soon there was a glass of champagne in his hand. They retreated to a corner of the ballroom, where the air was cooler and the voices softer.

  “It will get better, Lord Wade,” she said. “People are just not used to you yet. Another party or two, and they’ll be back to normal.”

  “I’m not sure I’ll make it through another party or two.”

  “Shall I tell you about your sister?”

  He tensed. “Is something wrong?”

  “I don’t think so. She’s attached to your brother, which means she’s meeting people. I saw her dance a quadrille, although I do wish she wouldn’t look like she’s concentrating so hard.” She paused. “She’s seen us and is coming over.”

  Simon heard his sister breathing hard as she approached. “Georgie, have you even rested this evening?”

  She laughed. “Of course I have. I am not as popular as some of the ladies here, although maybe this is a little more enjoyable than I thought it would be.”

  Louisa squeezed his arm, but Georgie’s words weren’t exactly a ringing endorsement for success.

  “My dance card is almost full,” Georgie said dubiously.

  “You can’t be surprised by that,” Louisa said. “You’re a lovely, eligible lady.”

  “Perhaps, but some of these men are strangers to me, recently arrived from London. When one of them heard that I was acquainted with you, Louisa, he signed my card right away. I thought that was nice of him, though I can’t seem to remember his name just now.”

  As Simon listened to his innocent sister, his smile faded. Men from London who knew Louisa?

  “You’ll have to point him out to me,” Louisa said.

  “When I see him again, I will. Simon, even Lord Keane wants to dance with me—and a waltz, yet. Oh, the music is starting. I have to go!”

  “Damn, of course he chose the waltz,” Simon said grimly after his sister left. He was so upset that he spoke without thinking. “Louisa, this is what I’ve been worried about from the moment of your arrival.”

  When Louisa said nothing, he realized what had come out of his mouth.

  “You know what I mean,” he blundered on. “She would meet a rake and then—”

  “You equated that to my arrival,” she interrupted. “Why is that?”

  “I just meant that your London ways might be too much for Georgie.”

  “My London ways? Wasn’t that what your grandmother hired me for?”

  His face felt hot. He hadn’t imagined what it would be like to say such a terrible thing to her.

  “My lord, talk to me,” she said softly. “Surely it doesn’t need to be the dark of night for us to tell each other the truth. Since my arrival, you’ve managed to be with Georgie and me during every lesson, when a busy man such as yourself must have other duties to occupy him.”

  He took a fortifying sip of champagne. “Nothing is more important than my sister.”

  She waited.

  “Grandmama hired you for a good reason, but she didn’t know—” He broke off. If only he could see her face. “Louisa,” he murmured. “God, this is hard. Can anyone overhear us?”

  “No,” she whispered faintly. “It’s so loud and there are so many people and—Simon, please.”

  “Louisa, you have a certain reputation among some men of my acquaintance.”

  Were her eyes swimming with tears? Was she so pale she might faint? He wanted to hold her, needed to hold her.

  “Reputation?” She sounded shocked and full of disbelief.

  “As someone who is fast, who is willing to kiss, and maybe more.”

  She gasped. “But Simon, I never—you know I would never—before you—”

  “I know that now, believe me.” He wanted to touch her, thought her arm would be safe, but he missed and reached her hip covered in layers of skirts and petticoats. If they were seen, his blunder could only make everything worse. He pulled back. “It’s all lies but—”

  “But you…you thought that I would…that’s why you were…with me,” she finished in a hoarse whisper.

  Did she actually think he had kissed her because of those rumors, because he thought he could?

  “No, Louisa!” he said forcefully. He winced, wondering how loud he’d sounded. “We can’t discuss this here. I can’t even see who’s looking at us.”

  “No one, my lord.” Her voice didn’t sound like her own, so distant, so bitter. “Everyone is surely assuming that you are with me because of what you can get.”

  “That’s not true!”

  “I can’t talk, I can’t—�
�

  He felt her brush by him, and then she was gone.

  “Louisa?” he said her name, but already knew she wouldn’t be answering.

  He was alone.

  “Simon?”

  He was almost ashamed by how relieved he felt hearing his sister. “Georgie, thank God you’re here.”

  “Louisa didn’t even talk to me when she walked by. And I think she was trying not to cry.”

  “It’s all my fault. It slipped out and I—”

  “What slipped out?”

  “I…heard something about Louisa a long time ago. Now that I know her, I don’t believe it, but—”

  “Just stop,” Georgie said. “Tell me what you’re talking about, or I won’t be able to help.”

  “There’s a rumor that Louisa is…fast.”

  When Georgie said nothing for a minute, Simon said, “Georgie?”

  “I’m just trying to think what name I can call you in public.”

  “I get the idea.”

  “How could you think such a thing about Louisa?” she demanded.

  “I heard it from more than one source. I was worried that you being seen with her might…tarnish you as well.”

  “You treated her like this because of me?” she hissed.

  “Now that I know her, I don’t believe it anymore, but that doesn’t mean that others won’t. I was just trying to protect you.”

  “That’s why you’re here tonight, isn’t it,” she said angrily. “And now she knows. I didn’t think you were this much a fool, Simon. I have to go find her.”

  Simon said nothing when his sister left, even though he was now alone. For a minute he waited, hoping his grandmother or brother were looking for him, but nothing happened. Conversations swirled around him; someone he didn’t recognize called a greeting in passing.

  From the moment he’d become blind, this was what he had dreaded the most. Words were stuck in his throat; perspiration broke out on his forehead. How could he ask for help like a child? He didn’t even know if he was truly near a wall, which at least he could follow to a door and get the hell away from this mob of curious people.

  He was just about to risk stumbling toward where he thought the wall was, when he heard his name called again, and this time he recognized the voice.

  “Paul,” he said, knowing he sounded warm with relief.

  “I’m glad to see you here tonight,” Paul said. “I’m surprised none of your family is with you.”

  “Oh, they’re here,” Simon said. “But there’s a minor crisis, and Georgie had to take care of it.”

  “And she didn’t take you—I mean, you didn’t go with her?”

  Simon smiled grimly. “We’re still not used to the logistics of my needing a constant companion.”

  “Well, you have one now. Shall I take you to your sister? If you don’t mind my saying, I had a dance with her earlier, and she looks lovely this evening.”

  “Thank you for telling me, but much as I would like to be of help to her right now, it’s best I stay away. I’m at your disposal, Paul, and you have my thanks.”

  “There’s a card game in the library. Would you like to come?”

  “As long as you don’t need me as a partner.”

  Paul chuckled. “No, but as usual, they’re talking politics, and you’re more well versed than I am.”

  “Then lead on. I need something else to think about.”

  Chapter 16

  Louisa ran across the shadowed terrace, not stopping until she reached the balustrade. She hit it hard, and her hips ached and her breath came in gasps, but at least that pain was preferable to the one that soaked clear into her soul.

  She had a fast reputation.

  Everything seemed starkly clear now. What she had thought of as a good rapport with men, was only because they thought that she was easily…seduced. The rumors must have spread to the family of her first employer, because once she didn’t have the protection of her own wealthy family, they had treated her like she was fair game for anything.

  Her stomach twisted with bitterness, and she was glad she had eaten nothing so far, or it might have crept up her throat.

  Every memory of her happy life as a popular woman of Society was tainted. Every meaning, every motive was suspect now, and memories flashed in her head at a dizzying pace. She had thought herself so happy, so popular, so at ease, and instead, everything was a lie.

  And since nothing had happened with any man—not even a kiss, until Simon!—she couldn’t tell herself that even memories from an earlier time were all right. She had to disbelieve it all.

  No wonder Simon didn’t want to leave her alone with his sister. No wonder he questioned his grandmother’s motives. Louisa shuddered. Lady Wade couldn’t possibly know…could she? But no, Louisa would have been let go if the dear lady had thought she could harm her granddaughter.

  Her newest dreams for the future were dead now. She could not in good conscience ask innocent families to hire her to help their daughters. She let out a hoarse laugh. As if she even trusted herself to have anything worth teaching. Simon had said he heard these rumors from a few men, but might they not have told women, too? She hugged herself forlornly.

  Simon had known the truth about her reputation, and said nothing. He’d obviously meant to protect Georgie—that was his reason for being here tonight, Louisa thought bitterly. He wasn’t recovering, as she’d hoped; he was desperate. Now she understood why he’d questioned Leo’s protection of Georgie at the dinner party a few days ago, and why he’d had to take over himself.

  Had Simon allowed Louisa to remain at Enfield Manor for a different purpose? Her stomach convulsed with nausea, and she grasped the balustrade for support even as her tears continued to flow unchecked. Was she truly even more convenient than she’d thought? Had he considered her an easy way for a blind man to—

  She couldn’t even think the words.

  She found herself questioning everything anyone had said to her these last weeks.

  “Louisa!”

  Hastily, she wiped the wetness from her face and hoped the torches that lit the terrace hid much. Struggling for calm, she turned to face her student. With a shiver, she realized she shouldn’t even call Georgie that anymore.

  Louisa put on a smile. “Are you enjoying yourself, Georgie?”

  Georgie studied her with worry, and Louisa realized that she wasn’t hiding her own emotions well.

  Georgie briefly touched her arm. “I was doing fine until I saw your face when you left Simon.”

  “Left—” And then she realized that she’d left him alone. “Oh, Georgie, is he all right?”

  “I can’t believe you’re worried about him after what he said to you. He’s not helpless.”

  Louisa looked away. “He shouldn’t have told you,” she said in a hollow voice.

  “I forced him to. I hope you don’t judge us all on his idiocy.”

  Louisa gave her a faint smile. “He only wants you safe, Georgie. None of this is his fault.”

  “Hurting you is. He certainly didn’t have to tell you about these foolish lies.”

  “He didn’t mean to.”

  “That’s no excuse.”

  “And I can’t even call them lies, not anymore.” The words shuddered out of Louisa.

  “You’re talking about you and Simon,” Georgie said flatly.

  Louisa closed her eyes. “Am I that obvious?”

  “He can’t keep himself from being near you. I’ve thought it was wonderful.”

  “And now you know that there was a darker reason. He must have thought that I—”

  “Louisa, I’ve known my brother a lot longer than you. Even if he believed those lies, he would never treat you like that.”

  “Maybe we don’t understand what it’s like to be trapped in the dark forever, feeling desperate.”

  “He can be a fool, but I won’t let you think the worst of him. Whatever you two have together, it is not a sordid, ugly thing. I’ve been hoping,�
� she lowered her voice, “that you might someday be a sister to me.”

  Louisa choked back a sob. “That won’t happen, Georgie. He does not want to marry.”

  “He’ll get over that.”

  “I don’t think so. And after tonight, now that I know the truth…how could you think I would inflict myself on your family? I’ve always known that my Society is below yours, but this—”

  “Don’t talk like that! You’re not leaving us. I don’t give a fig what some ignorant men say to one another. Anyone who knows you understands the goodness in you.”

  Louisa gripped Georgie’s hand. “You are a sweet girl, Georgie, but you’re naïve.”

  “Then naivete is a strength. Trust me, Louisa. Don’t make any hasty decisions. Let us go on as we have been. I’ve been making real strides tonight. But now we should go back inside.”

  “They can’t think any worse of me, but if you’re with me—”

  “Stop worrying so much!”

  “I just need a few minutes to compose myself, please. I’ll be inside soon, I promise.”

  “I can’t leave you like this.”

  “I’m done pitying myself, and the tears have truly stopped. I just need a moment for my red, puffy face to look somewhat normal.”

  “All right, but you come find me so that I know you’re back.”

  “I will, I promise.”

  When Georgie kissed her cheek, Louisa almost started crying again. But she forced a smile and a wave, and then she was alone.

  But not for long. She was taking deep breaths, dragging her thoughts away from sadness, when she heard footsteps behind her. She turned around and found herself too close to Lord Keane. He was wearing a smile as he looked down at her, and he didn’t bother to conceal the fact that he wasn’t just looking at her face. Wishing she could yank her gown higher, she settled for a cool nod.

  “Good evening, Lord Keane. If you don’t mind, I came out here to be alone.”

  “Yes, it is rather private,” he said in his smooth voice, “but surely you don’t mean all alone. Haven’t you been waiting for a lucky man to join you?”

  She started to tremble. There was no one on the terrace but the two of them. And she had nothing left of her reputation or family to protect her.