Jake shuffled as he glanced down at the pen in his shirt. He hoped Madi was able to hear everything.
“Just tell me what happened. Tell me what you can,” he replied.
She took a deep breath and sat back down on the bed. “I got a call telling me I had to go to Australia. I was told he had a part for me to play. He said if I did what he asked, I’d never have to hear from him again.”
Jake nodded his head and watched as she stood and paced the room.
“When I arrived at the airport, there was a hotel key card and a car waiting for me. I followed the directions. I opened the door and saw you. I didn’t even know why I was there. You were naked and lying on the bed. You weren’t awake. I was told to undress and play the part. I was told to make love to you.”
Jake swallowed hard. “Did we… did we have sex?”
“No!” she gasped. “I may be an exhibitionist and really stupid, but I’m not a rapist!”
Jake expelled a long, held breath from his lips.
“I was told to make it look like we were making love. If it makes you feel any better, I cried afterwards. It actually would have been nice, you know? To kiss you. To be wanted by someone like you. You’re a fine looking man and a good one too.”
Jake pursed his lips. “Please. Don’t do this,” he pleaded. “Like I told you before. You and me… It isn’t going to happen.”
She nodded her head. “You really love her, don’t you?”
“More than she knows.”
“I’m sorry about you two. I could tell she really cared about you.” Jake nodded his head.
“What happened after the pictures?” he asked.
“I left. I didn’t know what was going to happen. He told me that I needed to disappear for a few days. He said if I ever told anyone what had happened, that it would be the end of me. He said I should keep my mouth shut and that if I did what I was told, he’d never contact me again. I believed him, until…”
“Until what?” Jake asked.
“Until he called me again. He told me that he’d had some time to think. That he’d been looking at the pictures and he’d decided that he and I made a good team. He said he wasn’t ready to give me up.”
Jake shook his head. “What a bastard. I’m sorry, Allie. Let me help you. Tell me who’s doing this to you.”
“As much as I want to, I can’t. Not right now. I need some time to think. I’m thinking about just coming clean. Then maybe he won’t be able to use me anymore. Just know that what I did—what I’ve done… I never meant to hurt anyone.”
Jake nodded as he watched her pace nervously. “I have people. Good people, who can help. Just say the word…”
“Thank you, Jake. You’ve always been so good to me, and now, even after everything I’ve done—”
“I’m not happy, don’t get me wrong, and I’m not giving this up, even if you’re not willing to tell me who’s behind this. I’m going to find out, one way or another. But at least I know the truth about the pictures. Not knowing—not being able to remember—was killing me inside. I can only hope that Madi can forget what she thinks she saw and give me another chance.” He bent his head a little lower as he spoke, making sure Madi could hear every word he said. Hoping that somehow, they’d be able to get past this and put it behind them.
***
SHE’D HEARD EVERY word. With every single sentence, she could feel the knife pulling from her chest, except when Allison talked about his body. It twisted slightly before she wanted to charge into the room and put her hands around Allison’s scrawny little neck. Ang was right. There was another side to the story. Kendra had watched her face contort, smile, twist and frown as she listened on the earpiece. She kept mouthing, What? What did he say? What did she say? Rob put his hand up to her and Madi heard him whisper, “She can’t talk and listen at the same time.”
Then Kendra said, “I need to know. This is ridiculous.”
Rob whispered, “Have a little patience.”
Then Kendra pounded her foot like a five-year-old and gritted her teeth at him. “Don’t tell me what to do, secret agent man!”
Rob crossed his arms, and Kendra mimicked his movement as they stared at each other. Madi listened to Jake as she watched them. They were adorable together. A little skip in her heart gave her hope that maybe they all could find some form of happiness.
She’d heard Allison’s confession and Jake’s countless professions of love and devotion to Madi. She hated to admit it, but she loved the way he’d refused Allison, even though she’d really wanted him. She actually felt a little sorry for Allison. Madi knew what it felt like to want but not get him. She never wanted to feel that way again.
When he exited the room, Madi removed the earpiece from her ear and handed it back to Rob. Jake stood stiff at the door and stared at her, waiting for some sort of reaction. As she turned from Rob to Jake, their eyes met. He released a heavy breath from his lips as he lowered his head to look at her from the tops of his eyes. She bit her lip as her eyes softened and he smiled, bigger than she’d ever seen. She charged the small space between them and flew into his waiting arms.
He swung her off the floor and twirled her around as she flung her arms around his neck.
“What the fuck?” Kendra said. “Will someone please tell me what’s going on?”
Jake stopped and lowered Madi to the floor, cupping her face in his hands and staring lovingly into her eyes.
“I’d say everything’s fine,” Rob sighed.
Kendra glared at him as her neck twisted. “No shit, Sherlock. I just want to know what she said. Do you always state the obvious?”
Jake’s and Madi’s eyes glazed as they stared at each other, not moving an inch. Madi couldn’t take her eyes off of him. He hadn’t cheated on her. He was still hers.
“I should have never doubted you,” she said.
“I know why you did. The pictures were hard to ignore.”
“You love me, don’t you?” she asked playfully.
“I really, really do,” he responded, placing his lips softly on her forehead. Madi closed her eyes and took a long, lingering breath, taking in everything around her: his smell, which made her weak; his strong hands on her cheeks; and his soft lips on her head. The relief came off her in waves, along with the weight of the world.
Rob cleared his throat. She and Jake turned their heads to see Rob waiting patiently and Kendra tapping her foot with her arms crossed against her chest.
“We need to get out of here,” Rob said as he placed the earpiece back in his ear and glanced from one end of the hall to the other. “What should we do with her?” he asked Jake, pointing to the door.
“Let her go, but have her followed. She knows who set this up. She’s being blackmailed. I’ll tell you everything in the car.”
Jake held Madi’s hand as Kendra wrapped her arm around her from the other side, attempting to pull her away.
Madi smiled and kissed her cheek as they walked.
“Do I have to ride up front with Dudley?” Kendra whispered.
Madi nodded as Jake opened her purse and put the pen back inside.
Kendra sighed and climbed in the front seat. Jake retold the entire story, almost word for word. Rob scratched his chin as he listened, occasionally glancing in the rearview mirror back to Jake and Madi.
“Someone you trust?” Kendra gasped as she turned to face them. “How do you know it’s not soldier boy?” she asked as she shifted her thumb toward Rob.
Rob sighed again.
“He was with us the whole time,” Madi reminded her.
“Hmm…” Kendra said as she eyed him suspiciously.
Jake reminded them that they couldn’t say a word about this to anyone.
Everyone nodded in agreement. Madi faced him and stared at his lips. He brought her hand to his mouth and kissed her fingers.
“Oh, brother…” Kendra turned around to face forward. “I think I liked it better when she hated you.”
�
�I hope she doesn’t hate me,” Jake said, watching her reaction, her fingers still pushed to his lips.
“She doesn’t hate you,” Madi replied with a smile.
“Can you drive any faster?” Kendra asked.
Rob chuckled lightly. “Holy shit!” Kendra shouted. “I’ve seen you smile and heard you laugh today. You must have broken multiple personality rules.”
“Personality rules?” Rob questioned.
“Yeah. Like showing you might have one.”
Jake laughed from the back seat, and Madi smiled, but only because his laugh and the sound of his voice lit up her dark world once again.
Jake and Madi walked arm in arm up the stairs and toward her room. Madi paused as someone stopped to stare at him with a gaped mouth. She reached behind his head to lift his hood, trying to cover him up.
“I don’t care,” he said as he pulled away from her.
“You don’t?” she questioned.
“I have nothing to hide.”
“Aren’t you worried someone will find out?” she asked.
“Nope. I hope they do.” Jake glanced over his shoulder as Kendra, with Rob behind, walked up the stairs.
“Stop staring at my ass,” Kendra said as she turned to Rob.
Once again, he said nothing. He darted around her and up the stairs, in front of Madi and Jake, to make sure everything was safe.
It was a Tuesday night and the halls were quiet. When they reached her door, Madi waited and stared at Jake, wondering if he was leaving. Kendra sprouted forward, hugging her as she said, “I hope you don’t mind, but I’m going back to my room. I’m sick of your floor.”
Madi smiled and kissed her cheek. “I love you, Ken.”
“Yeah, yeah… Don’t get Buzz too jealous.”
Madi laughed and Kendra strutted away, flicking Rob off from behind her as she walked.
The three of them stared after her. “I think she likes you,” Jake said as he elbowed Rob.
“I’m going to make a sweep of the area and check in with my team.”
“Thank you, Rob,” Madi said with a smile. He nodded his head and walked toward the door.
Jake glanced down at Madi and rubbed his thumb across her cheek. “You look exhausted.”
“I am,” she replied. “It’s been worse than a nightmare.”
“Yes, it has,” he replied with a nod of his head before peering over her, toward the chairs in hall. “You get some sleep. I’ll be here as long as you need me.”
Madi shifted uncomfortably as she followed his gaze to the chairs. “You’re staying here?”
“As long as they’ll let me. Rob has a room downstairs in the basement.”
“He does? How does he have a room?”
Jake smirked. “Didn’t you wonder how he’s always here? We had to get university permission for him to be around you constantly without question. They know who he is and why he’s here.”
“They do?” Madi asked as she wrapped her arms around her waist.
“They do,” he replied with a smile as he brushed a strand of hair away from her face.
“So you’re staying with Rob?” she asked shyly.
“Um, no. I’m going to stay until midnight at which time, when I’m caught, I believe I will be escorted from the premises. There’s a hotel not too far. I’ll just get a room.”
Madi took a deep, uncomfortable breath.
“What is it?” he asked as he lifted her chin, forcing her eyes to his.
“I’m not ready for you to go.”
“I’m not going just yet,” he smiled. “I want you to get some rest. I’ll be back before you wake up.”
“That’s the thing,” she said. “I don’t know if I can sleep.”
“Why?” he questioned as he furrowed his brows.
“I’ll be worrying about you. You look terrible,” she stated, her face etched with concern.
“That bad, huh?” he asked.
She nodded.
“I’ve been a little out of my mind.”
“A little?”
He smiled.
A girl thudded through the hall, eating a banana, and almost choked when she saw Jake.
“Can you come in for a minute?” Madi asked.
He smiled. “I think I can spare a minute for you.”
Madi reached into her purse, found her keys, and unlocked her door as eyes from behind her bore into her back.
Jake smiled at the girl walking by and said, “That’s a healthy choice,” as he motioned to her banana.
Madi giggled and pulled him through the door.
“You don’t blend well,” she laughed.
“I don’t?”
“No,” she replied as she flipped on the light and dropped her purse on the desk. “You’re too pretty.”
“I’m pretty?” he asked with a smirk.
She sighed and rolled her eyes.
He shifted, sliding his hands into his pockets, glancing around the room. “So this is it, huh?”
Madi turned her head in response, following his eyes with hers, taking in her room as he might see it.
“It’s nice. It’s you,” he said with a smile as she pulled her fingers through her hair.
“I’m a mess,” she sighed.
“You’re beautiful.”
She glanced up as his eyes took her in. The pull of the magnet began to buzz. She could feel the energy shift between them. “I was scared I’d never see you again,” she told him.
He nodded as his hands dug deeper into his pockets. One emerged briefly as it shifted through his hair, then resumed its place. “I knew I’d see you. I just wasn’t sure for how long.”
“You’ve been through hell, haven’t you?” she asked, gently placing her hand on his face.
“I’d go through hell ten times over if I’d always come out with you on the other side.”
Madi sighed, pulling her hand away. “There you go again.”
“What?” he questioned as his lips curled into a smile.
“Saying all the right things.”
He shifted his stance and dug his hands deeper into his pockets.
Madi glanced down at them as she asked, “Are your hands in your pockets so you won’t touch me?”
He smiled as he nodded, “Yes.”
She sighed. “You don’t want to.”
His head shifted on his neck as his shoulders slumped. “You’re kidding me, right?”
“It’s okay,” she spoke softly. “I know things are really weird between us right now. I know we’ve taken a few steps backwards. I just want you to know…”
His neck bent and his hands flew from his pockets as he crushed his lips into hers. She gasped before lifting up onto her tiptoes to reach him better as her arms slid around his neck.
As he kissed her, he mumbled, “Nothing has changed. If anything, I love you even more.”
“More?” she mumbled back.
“More…” He slid his tongue into her mouth and she moaned, accepting him willingly and wantonly. His mouth parted from her as she struggled to catch her breath. “My hands were in my pockets because I’m in your room and I don’t know how you feel. There’s still so much to be said, but it’s late and I’m worried about you.”
Madi nodded as he quickly pressed his lips into hers for a brief kiss. He glanced toward the door. “I should go.”
Madi felt her breath hitch. She wasn’t sure she could bear to be away from him right now, or ever.
She mashed her lips together as she glanced between Jake and the door.
“What is it, baby?” he questioned, suddenly extremely concerned.
“Will you stay with me?”
Jake’s eyes widened and lit up like he’d just been offered the chance of a lifetime. “You want me to stay?”
“Only if you want to.” Her eyes fell to the floor, suddenly self-conscious and embarrassed. What if he didn’t want to?
“I want to. I just would never have asked or begged. I thought it was out of th
e question. I just assumed you…”
“Needed some time?” she said, finishing his sentence.
He nodded. “Yeah.”
“I do and I don’t. I’m so tired that I’m having a hard time separating dreams from reality. But I do know that I’ll never be able to sleep if I’m worrying about you.”
His lips curled up for a moment as he studied her. “Won’t you get in trouble?”
“They don’t require you to sign in until after ten at night, for commuters. You didn’t sign in, did you?”
He shook his head.
“Please stay,” she asked, raising her eyes to his.
“I’m not going anywhere.”
LIGHT HIT HIS eyes through the cracks of the blinds. He blinked several times and shifted his head so that he could position himself away from the beam. His arm and his chest felt heavy as he focused his eyes downward. She lay on his chest in his arms, her leg curled over his. They’d lain down in bed, fully clothed, and the minute she’d placed her head on his chest, she’d been out. He hadn’t been far behind. He was exhausted. He had no idea what time or even what day it was. The jet lag hit him hard, along with the emotional roller coaster and drugs he’d encountered, and his head still ached. His heart was much better. He tightened his arms around her and noted every little thing about her. Her bangs shaped her face and the long strands of hair fell over her shoulders and onto his arms. He loved her hair. He loved everything about her. He loved that he could see her ankle in the place where her jeans separated from her sock. He loved the way her body rose and fell with every breath she took, and the way her hands were still holding his shirt so he wouldn’t go. As if he’d ever leave.
She moved slightly and sighed awake. When she noticed where she was, she turned her head into his chest and took a deep breath. It made him smile to know she was still happy he was there.
“Good morning.”
She lifted her squinting, blinking eyes to his. “You’re here.”
“Is that still a good thing?”
“It’s always a good thing,” she said, shifting her body upward to be closer to his face. Her eyes explored his as he pushed a stray hair from her lips.
“I don’t remember falling asleep.”
Waiting to Lose Page 21
