Neo Soulless Bastards MC Daytona: Soulless Bastards MC Daytona book 4 (Soulless Bastards Daytona)

by Erin Trejo

  “I gave her everything, Hen. I can’t chase someone who doesn’t want me. I won’t do it. I have enough shit goin’ on in my own head to deal with hers. She knows where to find me.”

  Chapter 22

  Leesa

  “Anna, what are we doing?” I hiss under my breath. She shushes me and goes back to what she’s doing. I don’t think I can do this. I don’t know if I want to. My hands are clammy, my body tense. I can’t believe that I let her talk me into this shit. We’re going to jail. I can feel it.

  “Just do what I told you. He won’t even feel it,” she says, looking over her shoulder with a grin on her face.

  Her black eye is slowly healing, her lip slowly going back to normal. Dave hit her. He hit her a lot. I didn’t see it at first when they came to the club or maybe I didn’t want to. Anna though, God Anna has been the best. She’s perfect. She hugs me, holds me. She makes me feel like everything will be okay when I know it isn’t. Running from Ray was the best choice. It had to be. If anything happened to Neo or his mom, I would never forgive myself.

  “What if we get caught?” I ask, raising an eyebrow.

  She rolls her eyes and passes me a needle full of liquid. I take it in my gloved hand and look it over.

  “Then I’ll take the blame.”

  “No! I need you!”

  “No, you don’t. You can run until the world ends, Lee, but you need him. We both know it.”

  I’ve talked to her, confided in her. She knows about Neo. She doesn’t know names or anything like that but she knows the basics.

  “He doesn’t want me,” I say softly. He couldn’t after what I’ve done. Granted I haven’t worked at the club since the night I met her and Dave. They took me in, gave me another job. I didn’t have to do much but sell a little meth here and there. They let me stay with them, but the longer I’m here the more I see that was a mistake too. Now we’re here planning on killing him of all things.

  “Of course he does. He’s a man. They are just too stupid to realize it,” she replies, pulling the knife out and stuffing it in her bra.

  “You are going to cut your tit off.”

  “It’s closed. Come on. Go in there, stick it in his neck, and walk off. Meet me in the bathroom. Dave is stupid. He will follow you before the drugs kick in. By then he will be in the bathroom and no one will see shit.”

  I roll my eyes because her plan is stupid. This isn’t going to work. If we get caught, we’re going to jail for murder. But really, what difference does it make now? Besides her, I’ve lost everything. I shrug and stand from behind the dumpster, walking toward the shit bar that Dave is in. The music blasts through the speakers as I open the door and waltz in. I can’t believe I’m doing this. I glance around when I spot him sitting toward the back with some girl sucking his cock. I should have seen that coming. Strolling through the bar like I’m meant to be there, I smile and blend in. When I’m within reach, I slide the needle from my pocket and quickly stab it into his neck.

  “What the fuck?”

  His head jerks around and I take off toward the bathroom. Anna better have her ass in there. I can’t fight him off and now I’ve screwed up my only place to live and work. I’ll have to move again. I’ll have to find more money. I shake the thoughts away as I step into the bathroom. I don’t see her.

  “Shit,” I hiss when the door flies open. Dave’s eyes are wild as he stares at me.

  “What did you do? What the fuck did you inject me with?”

  He walks toward me, his eyes on fire. I step back, my back hitting the wall when his hands wrap around my throat. Everything seems to happen in slow motion. His eyes, I can see them. Neo. I try to talk but no words form. I try to blink but I can’t. I’m drifting slowly and then suddenly air slams into my lungs. I cough and suck it in.

  “Sorry I’m late,” Anna apologizes over her shoulder, a bloody knife in her hand. Dave is on the floor, a pool of blood circling him. I gasp for air when the door flies open once more.

  “Oh my God!” A woman screams before running back out. Anna shrugs. I always knew something was off with her.

  “You need to go,” she says. I shake my head. Go? Go where? I have nowhere to go anymore. “Cops will be coming soon, Lee.” I look up at her and see the calmness in her eyes. How? Why?

  “I don’t understand,” I whisper.

  “You don’t have to. You were a means to an end. I knew I couldn’t kill him alone.”

  I shake my head confused. I thought she liked me. I thought we were friends.

  “You kept me around…just to kill him?”

  Confusion hits me hard. I can’t believe that. I was never with her again after that night at the club. Hell, I wasn’t with either of them. Once we made it back to their apartment, I was offered the job and that was that. I didn’t mind, to be honest. I liked being alone for the most part, but Anna, she almost seemed like a sister to me in the short time I was with them. She acted like she cared about me and I was stupid enough to believe it.

  My back hits the wall before I slide to my ass and sit here. Dave’s blood slowly seeps into the fabric of my jeans as I sit here and try to comprehend what I’ve done. I don’t know how long it’s been; it couldn’t have been too long when the door flies open. Cops swarm into the bathroom, pulling Anna into cuffs before moving toward me. I don’t know what to do, what to say. What do I do?

  “She didn’t do anything. I don’t even know her! Stupid bitch was in here when I came in. Look at her,” she laughs. “She’s shocked as hell. You better get her a good doctor to talk to.”

  Her laughter pisses me off but she’s helping me. She didn’t tell them that I’m the one who stuck the needle into his neck. She even cleaned the syringe off and left her prints on it. She isn’t implicating me at all. The cop in front of me jerks me to my feet and pulls me through the bathroom. I mindlessly go as he takes me out the back door and toward a police car. He doesn’t cuff me but he is talking. I don’t hear what he’s saying. My mind has zoned out. I’m so fucked. What am I going to do now? I have nothing. I have no one. Tears stream down my cheeks as the door slams closed behind me and I glance over. I can see her. Anna. She gives me a wink and a nod before looking away from me. She saved me from going to jail. She used me. There are too many emotions that I can’t sort out right now.

  It didn’t take long to get me to the station. I’ve mainly sat in silence unsure of everything that occurred tonight. She killed him. Right there in front of me. I’d never seen anyone killed before. It was the worst feeling ever. A shiver runs down my spine when the cop pulls a blanket over my shoulders.

  “Are you sure you don’t want to see a doctor?” He asks once more. I shake my head no again. I don’t need a doctor. I don’t know what I’d even say to one. “Who are we calling to pick you up?”

  Who indeed? I have no one to call. Tears well up in my eyes at that realization but something else hits me too. Him. I could call him. He would come. He might hate me but he would come, that’s just how he is. Reaching for the phone I dial the number and hold my breath.

  “Hello?” Oh God. His voice. I open my mouth but words won’t form. What do I say? “Hello?” Tears stream down my cheeks. “Leesa?” My mouth opens and closes like a fish out of water when the cop takes it from my hands. He gives me a sad smile before bringing the receiver to his ear.

  “This is Officer Brent. We have a Leesa Goodman here. No, sir. No, she’s fine. Let me explain.”

  I can hear him screaming into the line, the poor cop trying to get a word in. My chest feels tighter. I can’t think. I just want to melt away and never deal with any of this again.

  “There was an incident, sir. Miss Goodman witnessed a murder. No, she’s fine. She wasn’t hurt. Sir, if you could just…”

  “Are you threatening me, sir?” I almost laugh. The giggle gets stuck in my throat. I can’t hear what’s being said but just listening to the cop trying to reason with him is enough. “Yes. That’s right. No, she will remain here until you
come.” That’s the end of the conversation. The cop looks down at me blowing out a breath. It’s a little funny to see how frazzled he is.

  “He will be on his way shortly.”

  That’s it. That’s all he says before turning and walking away. Now I can’t stop the laughter that escapes me. It comes out but quickly turns to sobs of pain and regret. I helped kill a man.

  Chapter 23

  Neo

  “Is she bein’ charged?” I roar, the cop flinching back. Ransom lays a hand on my shoulder trying to calm me but that isn’t going to work. Not now.

  “No, sir. But we need to get her to sign her statement,” he tries to explain.

  Fuck him. I storm around his desk and straight into the back when I see her. She sits at a desk, her hair a tangled mess, a blanket around her shoulders. My heart nearly crumbles inside of me. She had to see someone killed. Right in front of her. It rips another piece of my heart out to know that she had to go through that but she still hurt me. More than I care to admit.

  Clearing my head, I walk over, grab the pen off the desk and look at the cop in front of me. “This her statement?” He nods his head about to open his mouth when I shake my head. “Sign your name.” Thrusting the pen in her direction, she takes it in a shaky hand.

  “Sir, we aren’t finished.”

  I ignore him, watching her sign it before jerking her out of the chair. Shoving her toward the door, she stops and I slam into her. I follow her gaze to a woman across the room.

  “She the one who killed him?” I ask in a low tone. Leesa nods her head and I start to move. She grabs my arm, halting me.

  “Don’t. She didn’t turn on me,” she says softly.

  I turn to face her, looking her in the eye. She fucking helped? Is that what she’s saying to me? I don’t need to ask. I can see it in her eyes.

  “You’re not the girl I thought you were,” I say, shaking my head and walking past her. Ransom moves in, grabbing her and bringing her toward the front. I storm outside, needing space, needing air. She fucking helped kill someone? I can’t wrap my head around it.

  “We need to go,” I hear Ransom say.

  I don’t look over. I don’t look at her. I can’t. I thought I loved that girl. I kill but I’ve always known what I was. Leesa? She isn’t a fucking killer. That’s not who she is. She’s the girl who gets stuck under fucking garbage bags that are three times her size. She’s the girl who helps others before she helps herself. This isn’t her.

  “Take her in the truck. I need some air.”

  “Neo,” she murmurs my name so softly.

  I lower my head, shaking it slowly. “I can’t look at you right now. Don’t give him any shit,” I tell her without ever looking over once.

  God, do I want to. I want to grab her and hold her. I want to kiss her soft lips and feel her close to me but I can’t fucking do that. My head is a mess and she isn’t helping it. She walked away from me. She left me. I stomp toward my bike, grabbing the helmet and ignoring the prospect looking at me sideways. Fuck him. Fuck all of them. I climb on and rev up my bike before pulling out. I need to clear my head. I need to think about shit but for what? Do I really need her? I’ve never needed a woman in my life aside from my mom and I failed her too.

  “Fuck!” I roar the faster I go. I ruined it all. I ruined my relationship with my mom. I ruined what I had with Leesa. I bet my sister is looking down from heaven laughing her ass off at me right now. I fucked her over too. Every woman I touch, I ruin. Those three right there were the most important to me and I managed to fuck them all over.

  Pulling into the clubhouse parking lot, I kill the engine and climb off just as Ransom pulls in with Leesa. He climbs out and moves around the truck to help her out. She looks so damn fragile right now. Like the slightest movement could break her and that in turn breaks me. I wanted love. I wanted a woman who I could have a future with but not like this. This isn’t how I planned my life to be.

  “She won’t talk,” Ransom says, nodding toward her. She stands there, leaning against the truck with a cigarette between her lips.

  “She need to see doc?”

  “I don’t know, brother. She isn’t talkin’ to me. She’s pretty shaken.”

  I nod my head in acknowledgment, but unsure of how to help her. I don’t know how close I want to get to her. I can’t handle her breaking me twice.

  “Take her in, yeah?”

  Ransom narrows his eyes at me and I raise an eyebrow daring him to challenge me. In the end, he huffs out a breath and walks over to get her. She shakes her head, even when he tries to reach for her. She looks scared, shocked. I remember seeing death for the first time overseas. I remember how it felt, the way it sucked all the energy out of me. Not everyone can handle seeing that. You have to have a certain kind of hold on yourself to keep going day after day seeing those eyes, that face in your mind. When I see she isn’t moving, I blow out a breath and walk over, slapping a hand on Ransom’s back. He pulls away from her and walks off.

  “It’ll never get easier; it will dull though. You will see that blood in your dreams. You will smell it. Death.”

  “I didn’t kill him.”

  “You were there. You saw it and in some ways that’s worse.”

  “How?”

  “If you can take a life, you can handle the aftermath. You know what you’re lookin’ forward to.”

  “I knew she was going to do it. I saw how he hurt her and I wanted her to be free, but when she did it…” Her words trail off, nothing more needing to be said.

  I get it, I really do. Slipping my hands into my pockets, I lean against the truck next to her and look up at the stars.

  “Somethin’ comes unhinged inside of you. You don’t see the person; you see the evil. You don’t see the blood; you see the escape. Not everyone can see it. Some feel it. Doesn’t mean it doesn’t haunt you just the same.” Leesa turns to look up at me and I want so badly to lose myself in her, but I can’t. Not now.

  “It was Ray. He shot at her,” she cries, tears falling hard.

  “What?”

  “Your mom. He followed us or had someone else do it or I don’t know, but that was him who called me. He said he would kill you both. He shot at her! Do you know how pissed that made me? I wanted to kill him, Neo! I wanted him dead so badly I could taste it!”

  “He’s dead.”

  “What?”

  “He’s dead. I killed him,” I voice matter of fact, as if it means nothing which to me, it doesn’t. He was nothing. But to hear her say that it was him shooting near my mom, that makes me want to kill that bastard all over again in a more painful way.

  “When? How? I don’t get it.”

  “You don’t have to get it, Leesa. He’s dead. That’s that. Move the fuck on.”

  “I want to see her,” she pleads softly. I swallow hard willing myself to keep my own tears at bay.

  “She’s gone too.” Turning on my heel, I walk away from her, leaving her to her own demons. I have too many of my own to fight hers too.

  Chapter 24

  Leesa

  I lie on the couch curled into a ball. I can’t believe she’s gone. I don’t want to believe it. It hurts. I didn’t say goodbye, I just left. Was she in pain? Did it happen quickly? I have so many questions and no answers. Neo hasn’t looked at me. He hasn’t spoken to me. It’s as though I don’t exist and I can’t say that I blame him. I deserve this. I deserve more. Everyone moves around me as if I’m not here. They aren’t purposely ignoring me though, not like Neo. They just know I won’t speak to them. I don’t want to. I hate being here. This clubhouse isn’t mine. I don’t want to be here, but I have nowhere else to go and no one to talk to. Saylor tries. Piper tries. Hell, even Henley tries, but I don’t have anything to say to them. They look at me and I see the pity in their eyes. I don’t want it. I brought this shit on myself. The doctor said it’s just from the stress of everything that’s happened. It’s not. I can talk if I want to but what’s the point? He doesn�
��t want me anymore. Ray’s dead. What do I have left? Nothing. I have nothing.

  Shoving off the couch, I stumble over to the bar grabbing the bottle out of the prospect’s hand and moving down the hall. I have a room. Neo made sure I was comfortable, but I hate being in there alone. That’s all I feel – alone.

  When I step inside, the sleeping pills are still sitting on the nightstand where the doctor left them. I take a long pull of the vodka and squeeze my eyes shut as it burns down my throat. I grab the pills off the table and pop the top as I sit on the bed pouring them into my hand.

  “What the fuck are you doin’?” I hear Triton. When I look up, I see him standing in the doorway.

  “Leave me alone.”

  “Don’t you fuckin’ do that shit, Leesa.” His warning makes me smile. Tossing the pills into my mouth, I quickly swallow them down with the vodka before smirking at him. “Fuck! Neo!” He rushes down the hallway as I roll my eyes and lay back on the bed. The vodka sloshes in the bottle next to my head as I close my eyes.

  “Get the fuck up,” Neo’s voice burns straight through me.

  “Fuck off.”

  “You have about twenty minutes before your stomach absorbs that shit. Get the fuck up!” he roars once more. I shove myself up and sit on the edge of the bed glaring at him.

  “I’m up. Now what?” I smirk.

  He moves toward me, grabbing the bottle out of my hand and throwing it at the wall.

  “You walked away from me once.”

  “And now it will be the last,” I tell him. His eyes blaze with fire.