Mary, Mary

by Lesley Crewe

  Mary wrapped up the chocolates and lottery tickets for her grandmother with Roscoe’s drugged help and gathered the few gifts she’d hidden under the bed.

  In the living room the old fake Christmas tree was on top of the coffee table decorated with small red balls, flashing coloured lights, and a rope of gold tinsel. There were even a few gifts around it, so she added hers.

  They enjoyed their feast in the kitchen. Mary found the package of Christmas napkins she’d bought one year on top of the fridge, so she took out three and put the package back. They looked nice on the table in the candlelight. Her mom made a show of carving the chicken, until Gran got impatient and ripped off one of the legs to put on her own plate.

  “Ma! Hold your horses.”

  “A body could starve to death waiting for you.”

  Mary sighed. “Who would like to say grace?”

  “We never say grace,” Gran replied.

  “It’s Christmas. It might be a nice gesture.”

  Gran grabbed a wing and bowed her head. “Dear God, give me strength. Amen.”

  “I second that emotion,” Carole said.

  “Motion,” Mary muttered.

  “Did you say something?” Gran shouted. “Speak up.”

  After they cleaned their plates, they took their dessert into the living room.

  “So what time do we arrive at the palace tomorrow?” Carole said with her mouth full.

  “Sheena said anytime.”

  “I’m not going until supper’s ready. Who wants to look at the motherlode of gifts under their tree? Do any of them even need anything? It’s obscene.”

  “Drew’s parents are coming for dinner too.”

  “Oh shit. That means I’ll have to babysit.”

  “I’m not gonna do nothin’.” Ethel went to pop a piece of fruitcake in her mouth but missed. It went down the front of her bathrobe, so she dug around until she found it.

  Carole pointed at her. “If something spills tomorrow, leave your boobs alone.”

  Mary put down her plate. “Maybe we should go to church tonight.”

  Both her mother and grandmother said, “What for?”

  “I don’t know. It might be nice to listen to Christmas carols.”

  “I’ve been on my feet all day and so have you,” Carole said. “Put on the radio.”

  “And the Yule log channel,” Ethel added.

  The remote and radio were on the other side of the room. Mary had to rock a few times before she could get off the recliner. It was old and went so far back that neither her mother nor grandmother wanted to sit in it.

  The three of them watched the flames dance and the wood pop and crackle as they listened to “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus.”

  Roscoe came weaving into the living room and sat and looked at them, or at least tried to.

  “What is wrong with that animal?” Gran pointed.

  “I gave him catnip.”

  “Can I have some?”

  On Christmas Day there was a deluge of snow, only this time it fell gently and made the whole city look like one big Christmas card. Lights twinkled from hedges and trees, front doors, and rooftops. Everything was clean and new, all the dirty snow and litter covered up under a pristine white blanket.

  But there was no peace or goodwill in the Ryans’ rusty Dodge Spirit that afternoon.

  “Ya should’ve let Mary drive! You’re all over the friggin’ road.”

  “Ma, shut the hell up! I’m trying to concentrate.”

  “Concentrating on crashing into light poles!”

  Mary was in the front passenger seat with a Sobeys bag in her lap that contained her relatives’ gifts. Her legs were ramrod straight as she tried to brake with a non-existent pedal. “Why can’t I drive?”

  Carole leaned into the steering wheel and wiped at the condensation on the window. “I’ve been driving since before you were born.”

  “Mom, don’t go so fast. We don’t have snow tires.”

  “Can’t afford them.”

  Ethel was bundled up in the back seat looking like an apple doll. “Oh, here we go. The ‘woe is me’ speech.”

  “I’m stating a fact.”

  “Then why don’t you let your sister buy you some?”

  Carole swivelled her head back to look at her mother. “I’m not accepting charity!”

  “Mom, watch where you’re going!”

  Somehow they managed to make it over to Coxheath without slipping into Blackett’s Lake. As they approached Peggy’s street, Carole’s scowl deepened.

  “Look at these places. They have more money than brains.”

  Peggy’s home was perched on a bit of a hill, looking over the water. It was a classic Cape Cod, nestled into the immaculate landscaping with a wide veranda and paver driveway stretching right to the highway.

  “I love those twinkle lights in the window boxes,” Ethel said. “Your sister always had good taste.”

  Carole gunned the engine and slipped and slid almost to the top of the hill before the car slowly started to roll backwards. “What kind of moron puts their house on top of a mountain?” she growled.

  After several more attempts with everyone also rocking forward to gather a little momentum, they ended up careening down the driveway and landing in the ditch on the other side of the road.

  Carole turned off the engine and lit a cigarette. Mary and Ethel knew better than to speak to her. The three of them sat in silence, fogging up the windows and getting colder by the minute. Carole took her last drag and flung the butt outside. “All right. We have no choice but to trudge up the hill. Mary, you’re in charge of your grandmother. I’ll take the gifts.”

  Mary had a hard time trying to get her Gran out of the car; the snow bank created by the plow was quite deep and her grandmother was wearing the short zippered ankle boots she’d bought in the 1950s.

  “Mary! Get her from the other side. Honestly, I have to think of everything.”

  “Get back, Gran, and slide over to the other side. It’ll be easier.”

  “Easier? I’m so cold now I can’t move my knees.”

  Mary poked her head out of the car. “You’re going to have to help me scoot her over the seat. She can’t move on her own.”

  “Hell’s bells.”

  “Why don’t you stay with Gran? I’ll go get Uncle Ted.”

  Mary ran up the long driveway and was out of breath when she got to the front door. She pushed down on the handle but it was locked. She rang the bell over and over again while pounding her fist.

  When it finally opened, Aunt Peggy, Uncle Ted, and Sheena were gathered in the foyer looking concerned.

  “Mary! What’s wrong?”

  “Uncle Ted, we couldn’t get up the driveway and the car landed in the ditch. We can’t get Gran out of the back seat.”

  Everyone sprang into action, pulling on their winter coats and boots. They skidded down the snow-covered driveway in a pack, Peggy carrying a fleece throw. Carole was leaning on the car door smoking a cigarette.

  “Is she all right?” Peggy yelled.

  “Of course she’s all right,” scoffed Carole. “Alcohol doesn’t freeze.”

  While they waited for Drew and his parents to arrive, the family gathered around the spacious Henderson living room. There was what looked like an enormous pine tree in the corner, but it was covered with so many gold and white ornaments and ribbons that Mary wasn’t sure if it was really there. A mountain of gifts was on display, as Mom had predicted, and it was hard to look away. You’d think that ten people lived in this house.

  Carole was making faces at Mary, so she assumed this meant to give Aunt Peggy, Uncle Ted, and Sheena their gifts, since the Sobeys bag was near her feet. She passed the gifts to her relatives.

  “Merry Christmas.”

  “Thank y
ou, Mary,” Aunt Peggy cooed.

  She did that every year. Always made the biggest deal out of the Avon bath powder and soap she got. Uncle Ted would rave about his new socks and Sheena would pretend to adore her Walmart necklace and earrings. It made Mary a little sad, but she knew they were trying to be kind.

  Then the Ryans would open their elaborately wrapped gifts. The paper and ribbon Aunt Peggy used would cost more than the Ryans’ total Christmas budget.

  Gran opened hers first. It was a beautiful new bathrobe that Mary knew would be stained by the end of the week. Also a silk nightgown and soft fluffy slippers. Her mother would take the slippers—Gran only liked pit socks on her feet—but maybe she’d give Mary the nightgown, since she only wore flannel. Gran’s eyes lit up when she opened a card with a mound of scratch tickets in it.

  “I knew you’d like it,” Aunt Peggy smiled.

  “I’m trying to get her off those damn things,” Carole said.

  “It’s Christmas. Lighten up.”

  Carole was next and her gifts were a lovely blouse, sweater, and scarf. They would join the others in her drawers at home. Aunt Peggy never clued in that her mother didn’t wear any of the stuff she bought her. Or maybe she did know and it was just a power struggle between them. But there were other gifts too, like a new hair dryer, curling iron, and straightener that were obviously destined for the salon. Carole was grateful.

  Then it was Mary’s turn. Sheena handed her a gift. It was a small box, so it wasn’t clothes. She tore open the paper and inside was an iPad. She felt the blood rush to her head. Sheena jumped up and down in front of her.

  “Do you like it?”

  “I…I….”

  “Peggy, that’s much too generous,” Carole cried.

  “Nonsense,” said Uncle Ted. “Every kid needs one of these. Let her enjoy it.”

  “Thank you so much.” Mary jumped up and hugged her Uncle Ted first. Sometimes she pretended he was her dad. She always felt safe when he was around. It was too bad she saw so little of him.

  “What does it do?” Gran asked.

  “Everything!” Mary said. “I can look at the stars at night.”

  “You could just poke your head out the window, too,” Gran said.

  Peggy asked if anyone wanted a drink or a nibble, so while the family dispersed to the kitchen, Sheena and Mary went up to Sheena’s bedroom and lounged on her canopied bed with two cans of Coke and a bag of Cheetos.

  “So it’s happening. It’s your dream come true.”

  Sheena looked at her ring. Mary noticed she did that a lot.

  “I’m very, very lucky, but one day it’ll be your turn.”

  Mary chugged her drink, the bubbles tickling her nose. She sighed and leaned against one of the ten pillows on Sheena’s bed. “I’m not interested.”

  Her cousin gave her a knowing look. “Everyone’s interested. What happened to that guy you used to date in high school? He wasn’t bad looking.”

  “He took me to the prom but left with my best friend.”

  “That sucks.”

  “Another guy I dated stole money out of Mom’s cash box.”

  “I never knew that!”

  “I didn’t say anything. I just put the money back. It was either that or visit Mom in prison after she beat him to death.”

  “Smart move.” Sheena put her can down on the bedside table, stretched out with her hands behind her head, and looked content.

  “So when’s the big day?”

  “Oh, not for another year or so. I want to take my time and have fun planning the wedding.”

  Mary poked her in the ribs. “You want the wedding more than the marriage.”

  Sheena grinned.

  Uncle Ted shouted up the stairs. “Drew’s here!”

  Aunt Peggy’s dining-room table was covered with tall cut-glass cylinders filled with round Christmas ornaments, cedar boughs, and holly berries. There were several snow-white candles scattered across the lace tablecloth, and each place setting had a crystal wine glass, an enormous gold charger, a slightly smaller silver one, and finally Peggy’s exquisite bone china dinner plates. Large cloth napkins held inside pewter rings topped each extravagant pile.

  There were swags of real cedar and evergreen boughs braided with little lights draped over the windows, fireplace, and staircase. Mary was sure the greenery on the mantel would catch fire if Uncle Ted didn’t stop poking the flames, creating a cascade of sparks.

  “Ted, sit down,” Peggy said. “We’re too warm as it is.”

  Carole leaned over and whispered to Mary: “Looks chilly to my left.”

  Drew Corbett and his parents were seated at the far end of the table. When they were introduced to Mary, Drew smirked, his mother gave her a wan smile, and his dad almost dislocated her shoulder shaking her hand.

  For most of the meal Mr. Corbett, who asked everyone to call him Chuck, dominated the conversation, and most of it revolved around cars. His wife, Maxine, sat beside him and picked at her food when she wasn’t rolling her eyes or staring out the window. Drew chewed with his mouth open while Sheena looked adoringly at him, and the rest of them were busy trying to keep Ethel from drinking out of everyone else’s wine glasses.

  Chuck finally put a large forkful of turkey dinner in his mouth and Uncle Ted seized the opportunity. He tapped a spoon against his crystal goblet and held it up. “I’d like to propose a toast.”

  Uncle Ted’s ears always turned bright red in social situations, and because of his receding hairline, his ears were now even more prominent. “I’d like to say that Peggy and I are very pleased to welcome Drew into our family. Although Drew and Sheena haven’t known each other long—”

  “You can say that again,” Maxine interjected before downing the wine in her glass.

  ”—ah, yes…well, it’s clear to me they are very much in love. At least, that’s what Peggy tells me.” He chuckled and everyone dutifully followed suit. “So here’s to Sheena and Drew.”

  “Sheena and Drew.” Everyone sipped their wine, but naturally Ethel gulped hers and proceeded to have a coughing fit. Carole hit her on the back until she stopped.

  Aunt Peggy cleared her throat. “Maxine, I’m not sure if you’re like me, but I was hoping the kids would have a church wedding.”

  “I don’t care if they get married in a barn. I’ve been through this twice with Drew’s older brothers, so knock yourself out. I’m not getting involved.”

  Drew opened his mouth to say something, but Chuck jumped in. “My wife can be a bit blunt on occasion. I’m sure what she means is that we’ll leave that decision up to the kids. It is their day after all.”

  Sheena glanced at her mother, who looked a little shell-shocked. “Mom, I think we want an outdoor wedding, maybe at the Keltic Lodge…somewhere nice.”

  “The Keltic Lodge is for old-timers,” Drew said.

  Sheena made a face. “No, it’s not.”

  “A reception is a party, and I want to party.”

  “We’ll discuss it later,” Sheena said, frowning.

  “I can provide all the cars,” Chuck offered.

  Ethel, who could barely see over the table, pointed her finger at Chuck. “Hey, since you’re going to be family, how about givin’ us a new car? Ours is in a ditch and it’s crap anyway.”

  There was a beat of silence.

  “Mom, you’re such a kidder!” Aunt Peggy laughed. “Why don’t you and Carole come into the kitchen and help me bring out dessert?”

  “What’s wrong with my granddaughters? You’re gonna make an old woman work for her supper? Nuts to that.” Ethel held out her wine glass. “Fill ’er up, Teddy, and don’t be stingy.”

  The meal went downhill from there.

  All parties were more than relieved when they went their separate ways at the end of the evening. Chuck thanked the Hend
ersons in a loud, booming voice as Maxine pushed him out the door, clearly impatient to be off. Drew gave Sheena a hasty peck before following them into the night.

  The family sat Ethel in a recliner in the family room and she was snoring before the first plate was cleared from the table. Peggy gave the girls a reprieve from the dishes, which annoyed Carole.

  “Don’t you ever make Sheena do anything around here?”

  “Oh, leave them be. I have a dishwasher.”

  “Yeah. Called Carole.”

  Peggy put the rinsed dishes into the machine. “I don’t want Sheena to hear our conversation. What did you think of Drew’s mother?”

  Carole picked up a dishtowel. “She’s one cold fish.”

  “Imagine saying, ‘Leave me out of it.’”

  “I have no doubt that you’ll do more than enough to compensate.”

  “And get this,” Peggy said. “Apparently she’s having an affair.”

  Carole picked up a washed pot. “How on earth would you know?”

  “Sheena told me.”

  “Well, how does she know?”

  “Don’t have a clue.”

  “Do you like Drew? Looks like a bit of a player, if you ask me.”

  “No one asked you.” Peggy slammed the dishwasher door closed. “He’s good-looking, educated, and well-off. What’s not to like?”

  “She’s twenty-two. Why don’t they just live together?”

  Peggy wiped her hands on her apron. “Why do you care if they get married?”

  Carole put down the pot and threw the dish towel on top of it. “You married too young.”

  “And you’re still jealous about it.”

  “Well, not all of us are lucky enough to have a car accident and marry the doctor on call. I knew Mary’s father for one night. After that I was too busy trying to make a living with a colicky baby and drunken mother to look after.”

  Peggy sank onto the nearest stool. “Are you still sticking to that story? I find it hard to believe you didn’t know his last name and you were with him for one night. You weren’t fifteen. You were Mary’s age.”