One Tiny Secret

by Adam Kunz

  As we pull into the parking lot just outside his dormitory, Parker finds a spot closest to the stairwell that leads up to his hallway. The senior housing actually resembles more of an apartment complex than an actual dorm.

  “Okay, so don’t make this sound like more than it is, but do you want to come up?” he asks, shutting off the engine.

  “Yeah, we’re only getting your phone, remember?”

  He chuckles. “Exactly.”

  “Besides, it’s kind of creepy out here, and I don’t really want to be left alone right now,” I joke, but my voice wavers.

  Reaching his dorm room, Parker puts his key into the lock, turns it, and pushes the door open. He flips the light switch, illuminating the room. While still standing outside, I peer around the quaint space that seems perfect enough for one. I’m actually surprised when it doesn’t smell like a gym locker, but instead has a fresh scent. The last time I was in here, I didn’t pay much attention to what it looked like or how it smelled, since I was suffering from one hell of a “hangover.”

  “Uh, you can come in, you know?” he calls out to me from the living room area.

  “I know, but I’m fine waiting here,” I answer as my eyes pan over to his twin bed in the corner. The bed is made, but all I can think about is messing it up.

  After hearing my response, Parker looks over at me, stalling the hunt for his phone. “Come on, don’t be silly. It’s cold outside.”

  He smiles when I step into the room before he resumes his search. Closing the door, I move to sit on the comfy-looking couch, all the while watching him look feverishly for his phone. You’d think he would’ve left it somewhere out in the open.

  “So, did you hide your phone from yourself or something?” I ask dryly after hearing him murmur, “Where could it be?”

  He laughs. “That’s a slight possibility, yes.”

  An obvious solution pops into my head. “Why don’t I just call it?”

  “Simple, direct…I like it,” he says with a grin.

  I roll my eyes before pulling out my phone to dial his. A song that I never expected to hear coming from his phone fills the room.

  “Is that Jason Mraz’s I Won’t Give Up? Wait…is that set to my number, or is that your ringtone for everyone?”

  He scrambles to grab his phone from under some clothes on top of the dresser, clearly embarrassed that I heard it. “Uh, it may possibly…be yours,” he replies, sweeping his hand through his hair.

  “Huh.”

  “Huh? That’s it? That’s all you have to say?” he asks, joining me on the couch. He slouches back into the opposite corner and props his right leg in front of him. “Say what you will about the song, but I can honestly tell you I’ve never done this for anyone else.”

  I’m not quite sure how to respond to him. Sure, it feels nice that this is the first time he’s customized a ringtone for someone, but…

  Aw hell. Who am I kidding? He’s freaking adorable.

  “Actually, I really like that song,” I admit with a smile.

  “Good.” He returns the smile. “You know, you have the prettiest smile I’ve ever seen. It’s a shame with everything going on that you aren’t able to smile more often.”

  My cheeks flush with heat as I dodge his intent stare. The smile that was on my face turns into less than a half-smirk and I simply reply, “Thanks.”

  The grin on his mouth widens. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable or anything.”

  “You didn’t. It’s just that I don’t hear things like that very often,” I reply, glancing over at him then averting my eyes.

  “Well, then it looks like I came back into town at just the right time.”

  “Why’s that?”

  “Because you should’ve had guys telling you this all day, every day,” he responds and my blush completely wrecks my face.

  Though I find everything Parker’s telling me very romantic and swoon-worthy, I just can’t seem to shake the fact I was physically assaulted by Unknown tonight. Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad Parker is trying to distract my mind with all this. It’s something he’s always done quite well. But reality is a bitch sometimes.

  “Was it something I said?” he asks, seeming to realize my mood has changed.

  “No. I was just thinking about how vulnerable Unknown has made me. I feel like my whole life is at his disposal to just eff with anytime he feels like it. I appreciate you trying to distract me, but the scary truth is I could’ve died tonight. He had me in his grasp and could’ve easily strangled me. That’s a terrifying thought, you know?”

  Parker goes quiet for a moment and leans forward, resting his right elbow on the back of the couch. “Don’t think like that, Dani. I’ll admit that the thought of me losing you tonight has been on my mind this whole time. It rips my heart out to even think about it. And because we’re never guaranteed tomorrow, I’m a firm believer that we should always seize what we want the moment the feeling hits us. Almost losing you tonight reminded me of that.” He slides closer to me and places his hand on my leg. “Which is why I’m going to do what I’m about to do right now.”

  Before I have a chance to say anything, he leans in and lightly kisses my mouth, as if testing the waters. As he pulls back slightly, I feel his warm breath caress my lips. He hovers there, waiting. When I don’t reciprocate the action right away, he takes a hold of my hand and places it on his chest. His heart is pounding ferociously. I feel every beat.

  “Do you see what you do to me?” he asks, his husky voice making me shiver. “That’s all you right there.”

  I find myself getting lost in his gaze and want so bad to just kiss him back, but I’m having a hard time separating Unknown’s hands all over me from Parker’s.

  “Parker—” I start to say, but then I’m distracted by him moistening his lips. “You know all I want to do right now is kiss you, but—”

  “Then what’s stopping you?” he asks, sliding my hand through the gap between the buttons on his shirt to rest on his bare chest.

  For a moment, every thought about Unknown leaves my mind, and all I can think about is how badly I want this man in front of me. Then my stubbornness gets in the way.

  “Unknown—he’s stopping me. I can’t get the idea of his filthy hands touching me out of my head,” I reply, removing my hand from Parker’s grip.

  “Well, how about you just touch me?” he asks, laying back to lean against the arm of the couch. “You can be the one in control.” He raises his arms above his head and lays there in a submissive pose.

  I stare at him, his face is serious, yet comforting. This doesn’t seem like him being cocky or too forward. He’s just trying to express how much he cares for me, and is even willing to let me be in control in order to make me feel more at ease. It’s kind of hot. He knows we both want this, and have for some time now.

  “I don’t want to force you to do anything you don’t want to,” he says, bringing his hands to rest on his stomach.

  “What makes you think you’re forcing me to do this?” I ask as I crawl on top of him. He goes to wrap his arms around me, but I scoop them up and rest them back behind his head. He smirks at this action, and lets out a small breath.

  “I could get used to this,” he says, raising his head to kiss the front of my neck.

  I release a tiny moan of satisfaction once the feeling of his lips on my skin becomes too much to bear. The sensation of his warm breath on the cool moist places wherever he leaves a kiss causes my body to erupt in delicious goose bumps. Leaning back to rest on his legs, I grab his shirt and rip it open. Thankfully his buttons are of the snap-together variety. I sit there admiring his physique with my hands—a physique he’s clearly put a lot of work into. He grins up at me when I catch his eyes, and pulls me closer. He wraps his arms around my waist and rolls himself on top of me.

  “Is this okay?” he asks close to my face. I can tell he wants to make sure this whole thing is how I want it to go. He truly does want me to
be in control.

  “Yeah,” I reply, nodding my head before placing my hands on his face and kissing him. He doesn’t resist in the slightest, and our lips collide.

  I reach around to the front of his shirt and wrestle to pull it back and down over his shoulders. He shakes out of it the rest of the way and plants his firm chest on me again. My hands find themselves exploring his sculpted back as he kisses me. The feeling of his firm tongue sweeping through my mouth fills me with anticipation of where this is eventually going to lead.

  When his hand begins to creep up my shirt, I squirm because I’m a little ticklish.

  “Is this still okay?” he asks, removing his hand from under my shirt. I smile at him because of how attentive and caring he’s being.

  I nod and put his hand right back where it was. He leans down close to my ear as his hand trails up my stomach to just below my bra. He grazes his fingertips just underneath it, causing me to clench my eyes shut while drawing in a deep, pleasurable breath.

  “You’re so fucking beautiful,” he whispers.

  Reaching down, I unbuckle his belt and undo the button on his jeans before sliding down the zipper. The sound of his zipper seems to send him into overdrive. He wraps an arm around me and pulls my shirt up. I raise my arms above my head, allowing the shirt to be easily removed.

  Parker holds my gaze when our eyes meet again, and gently caresses my face with his firm fingers. “There’s so much I want to tell you right now.”

  “Don’t tell me. Show me,” I reply, feeling all negative emotions slipping away and fully embracing Parker.

  He rises from the couch and tucks one arm under my knees and the other against my back. He cradles me into his arms as I wrap mine around his neck. Our lips remain connected until he lays me on his twin-size bed, and even then, it takes a few moments. We’re completely enraptured with one another. I sense every emotion Parker has for me through the slightest touch on my bare skin.

  He kicks off his shoes, followed by his pants, revealing the black-and-blue striped boxer-briefs underneath. He brings his mouth to rest on my stomach, placing small kisses around my belly button. His strong hands brace my hips as I begin to squirm from the crazy sensation. When I reach down to unbutton my hot pants, he stops me. He takes my hands and gently places them by my sides before flashing me a smile. His fingers graze my bare stomach, leading down to the top band of my hot pants. He teases my panty line before unbuttoning and unzipping the hot pants. Sliding them off with a little assistance from me, he tosses them to the ground to join the rest of our clothes.

  He brings his head up and places a kiss on my lips before heading over to his dresser. Throwing open the top drawer, he draws out a condom. He shuts off the light, plunging the majority of the room into darkness. The only source of light now is the one coming through the blinds just behind the bed.

  He places the condom on the nightstand next to the bed and climbs up, straddling me in the process. His muscular legs feel so nice next to mine. The blinds create a pattern of light across Parker’s chest, leaving his face silhouetted.

  “Are you sure you want to do this? Because I’m cool with just some on-top-of-the-clothes stuff. Well, at least what we still have on,” he says with a subtle laugh.

  I lean over and grab the condom from the stand. “I want to,” I reply, putting it in his hand.

  He brings his face into the light and I smile when I see that gorgeous grin of his. “Will you do the honors?” he asks in a smooth, sexy voice while putting the condom wrapper in front of my mouth.

  I rip open the package with my teeth and hand it back to him. After he crumples the wrapper in his fist and throws it off to the side, he presses himself against my bare skin. I look up at him and am filled with happiness at the look in his eyes. They aren’t lustful eyes. They’re caring eyes.

  As he braces his arm around me to get in a better position, I close my eyes and moan in anticipation of the first push. I wish he could feel what he’s doing to me right now. The love I feel for this man—

  Wait! Did I just say love?

  “I want you to look at me, Dani.” He speaks softly, hovering right above my face, penetrating my thoughts. I open my eyes and he smiles. “I’m not going to hurt you, okay? We’ll take it slow.”

  “Okay,” I reply.

  His lips press against mine in a passionate embrace as he eases inside me. I clutch his back and leave the comfort of his lips to rest my head in the space between his head and shoulder, preparing for the next thrust. I feel him pull back a little and place his hand on my chin so I face him.

  “I want you to look at me,” he whispers with gentle eyes just before he slides in again. His voice is so calming, and I just get lost, cast adrift amongst his words to the point that the slight pain felt is now replaced with pure, unadulterated bliss.

  I begin to move with him, feeling every inch of his muscles tensing along with mine. My eyes never leave his, even when he dips down to kiss me once more.

  “Dani?” he whispers breathlessly into my ear.

  It takes me a moment to reply because I’m so distracted by taking all of him in. “Yeah,” I answer moments later, just as out of breath.

  He starts to say something, but it’s stifled since my attention is focused on his hips moving forward against mine again. Then I slowly process what he was about to say before he cut himself off. He almost said the “L” word.

  I can’t lie and say I haven’t thought about telling him this too, but it’s quite a different thing to say it out loud. When you say it, that’s when it becomes real and not just some crazy thought in your own head.

  As he kisses me again, I can’t help but wonder why he stopped himself before he said it.

  Chapter Twenty Seven

  I watch as Parker pulls on his briefs and moves into the room off to the side, which I remember is the bathroom. Grabbing my clothes off the floor, I start to get dressed while waiting for him to return. I climb back onto the bed and sit there, replaying our intense love-making session in my mind. Then the “L” word pops into my head again, and I wonder again what stopped him from saying it to me earlier.

  “Dressed already?” Parker asks while coming back into the room.

  My surprised eyes dart over to him, almost like he caught me saying a secret out loud. When I realize I didn’t actually say anything, I reply, “Yeah. Midnight curfew, remember?”

  He comes over and gives me a big kiss on the lips while running his fingers through my hair. I let it go on longer than I probably should since I do need to get home soon. I just can’t bring myself to say no to him right now.

  Taking a breather, I say, “I really do need to get home, Parker.”

  He groans and gives me one last kiss. “All right. Even though it’s against my better judgment, I’ll let you leave,” he says, letting out a light chuckle. “Give me a sec to get dressed, okay?” He collects his clothes and moves back into the bathroom.

  I decide to go outside and get some fresh air. The room is filled with lingering heat and the scent of sex. It’s beginning to drive me wild. I open the door and step out, taking in a deep, relaxing breath of cool air. A contented sigh parts my lips and makes me smile.

  “So, you must be the new flavor of the week,” I hear a female’s voice come from my left side.

  I turn abruptly to face her because obviously she’s talking to me. “Excuse me?”

  “That Parker sure is quite the manwhore. You better run while you still can, chickadee, because his heart’s already taken by some girl named Dani.”

  “Who are you?” I ask, finding myself getting more annoyed the longer she keeps talking.

  “Oh, I’m just Ex-Plaything Number Three, who lives down the hall.”

  “Number three? He told me he only had one.” Her laughter brings an angry frown to my face.

  “You’re Dani, aren’t you?” she asks with an eyebrow raised.

  I close the dorm room door before I answer, not really wanting Parker to hear a
ny part of this conversation. “Maybe.”

  “You’re very pretty. I can see why he likes you so much. But let me give you some advice, girl to girl. Guys like Parker may truly only love one woman, but that doesn’t mean they’ll be satisfied with only one. Think about it,” she explains with a squinty-eyed smile.

  “You let me deal with Parker, okay? I think I may know him a little better than you,” I reply, though deep down I’m not confident in what I say.

  “Your funeral,” is all she says before starting to walk off. “Oh, and the name’s Sarah. Not that you really wanted to know, but there it is.”

  “It was nice meeting you, Sarah,” I call out to her.

  “Same here.”

  The door to Parker’s room opens and I glare at him. “Everything okay out here?”

  “Yeah. What makes you think it isn’t?” I reply, shrugging my shoulders.

  “Uh, your face kind of tells me it isn’t,” he states, joining me outside.

  I know I’m going to regret this the moment I ask. “Who’s Sarah?”

  Parker brushes his hand across his chin and gazes down the hall where I saw Sarah walking earlier. “She’s my ex. Was she just here?”

  “Yeah, and she told me she was number three. Is that true?” I ask, not sure if my heart can handle the truth right now.

  The moment he begins to comb his hand through his hair, I know my answer. “Dani—”

  “Just take me back to my car, please,” I say, interrupting him.

  “Can we talk about this?”

  “For right now, I think I’m done talking to you. All I want is to go back to my car and drive home. That’s the least you can do for me.”

  My heart feels like it’s being shredded into a bloody pulp, and I feel so stupid for yet again tearing down my walls for him.

  “Okay. I’ll take you to your car,” he answers, closing and locking the door behind him.