Show Me

by Janet Dailey

  ‘We were just finishing our sherry before going in,’ J.D. announced, unfolding his tall form from the velvet sofa and rising to his feet, an imposing figure of a man, like his son.

  ‘Give us a few minutes to freshen up and we’ll be down.’ Tanya held out her hand for John and flashed a smile aimed generally at the trio, but resting a shade longer on Patrick.

  In record time, she changed out of her slacks and blouse and into a well cut shirtwaister dress, the paisley pattern in carnelian red and rich navy blue. The confining hairband was removed and her tawny brown hair was brushed straight back from her forehead to fall around her long slim neck and shoulders to curl at the ends. The very simplicity of the hairstyle and dress bespoke sophistication and poise.

  Tanya went immediately to the kitchen, knowing full well that Julia expected her to be there. The Lassiters could afford a maid or a cook or a gardener, but Julia Lassiter’s home was her private castle. The work was either done by herself or under her watchful eye. The woman was perfect, Tanya decided grimly. There was nothing she couldn’t do as well as the best and better than the average. Her meals were a gourmet’s dream, but with a sufficient touch of the commonplace to satisfy her husband’s palate. The house was always immaculately clean with never a smidgeon of dust hiding in any forgotten corner or almost inaccessible nook. The garden, an extensive and imaginative piece of work, was tended only by Julia, although she graciously allowed Tanya or her husband to do the more mundane chores of mowing the expensive lawn area. And her person she kept elegantly groomed, never a hair out of place, no smudging of lipstick; a loose button was unthinkable; and her slips never peeped out beneath the hem of a dress.

  There was ample evidence Julia was not only a perfect wife and housekeeper, but also a mother. Never once did she question Jake about the gauche young girl he had brought home as his wife, nor commented on the baby boy he had identified as his son. Without the flicker of an eyebrow, she had carried out Jake’s wishes that he and Tanya have separate rooms. Not one word of recrimination had been directed at Tanya when her son had left within a few days of bringing his bride home, nor in the years that followed when he stayed away. Yet Tanya had the distinct feeling that she was only tolerated in Julia’s home because of John, who had become the centre of Julia’s universe. Tanya always heard an underlying tone of acidity in her mother-in-law’s voice whenever it was directed at her, and after all these years in the same house together, never once had there been a hint of affection or friendship to penetrate the cool reserve of Julia’s grey-blue eyes.

  Jake’s father, J. D. Lassiter, was different altogether. Tanya had once said with biting cynicism that Jake could charm the fangs away from a cobra, and after meeting J.D., she knew this ability had been gained from his father. J.D. was more honest and open with his feelings. When she had first come to his home with little John, he had been openly skeptical of her and decidedly disapproving of his son’s marriage to her, J. D. Lassiter was an autocrat and a powerful one — there was never any doubt about that. A shrewd businessman, a recognized expert in his field, and a keen judge of character, he had observed her transformation from an unworldly young girl barely out of school to a sophisticated young lady.

  Gradually his thinly veiled disapproval of her had changed to respect and admiration. A quiet hand of friendship had been extended to Tanya almost five years ago. Although there never had been any questions from J.D. about her relationship with Jake, she sensed that he knew the circumstances that had surrounded their marriage. Of course, he couldn’t know the whole truth. That secret was hers alone and she guarded it tenaciously, just as she guarded John. Yet it was her father-in-law’s droll wit and affection that had made it bearable to remain. But she would have gone through any hell that would have given John a name, a family and a future.

  Julia already had the first course of their evening meal on the table when Tanya arrived in the kitchen. Her apology for arriving too late to help was drowned out by her mother-in-law’s announcement that dinner was to be served. John was already taking his seat next to his grandmother as J.D. held the chair out on his right for Tanya. She smiled across the table at the square-jawed man sitting opposite her, a warmth pervading her at his answering smile.

  ‘You look ravishing in that dress, but then you would no matter what you wore,’ Patrick remarked.

  ‘You’re very generous, but a woman likes to hear those things, no matter how untrue they may be.’ Her voice was warmly polite as her gaze rested briefly on his strong resilient features and his darkly curling hair with a premature touch of grey around the temples.

  That undercurrent of electricity was flowing between them, its tingling existence a nearly tangible thing that couldn’t be ignored. The Lassiters entertained the executives of their company quite often and it had become an accepted thing that Patrick and Tanya should be paired together automatically. Her husband was in Africa for an indefinite period and Patrick Raines had been divorced for three years with his ex-wife remarried. Tanya tried to check the leaping of her senses whenever his dark gaze strayed to her, nullifying her reaction with the reminder that Patrick was the only eligible male she knew, and it was consistent with her romantic, secretly passionate nature to weave fantasies about a man as handsome and charming as Patrick.

  The few times they had been alone together, not an indiscreet word had been uttered, yet Tanya knew theirs was not a friendship between two people. They were both too aware of each other as members of the opposite sex, but Tanya’s old-fashioned morals wouldn’t allow her to disregard the diamond wedding ring on her finger and her vows of fidelity, regardless of the manner of man she had given them to.

  ‘Tell me,’ picking up her soup spoon and averting her gaze from his face, ‘where your travels took you to this time, Patrick. I had no idea you were going on a trip.’

  ‘It was a spur-of-the moment journey to Scotland for the company,’ a tiny pause, ‘with a major side trip to South Africa.’

  There was a hairline fracture in Tanya’s poise, so minute that only J.D. noticed it, his iron-dark head inclining towards his wife at the other end of the table.

  ‘Mother doesn’t allow business talk at the table — a rule of the house, Patrick. As if anything could detract a man from your onion soup, Mother. It’s superb as usual.’ His fulsome compliment was intended to tactfully shift the conversation.

  ‘Did you say you went to Africa, Uncle Patrick?’ John piped up, a suppressed excitement in his voice.

  ‘John!’ Tanya softened the sharp reprimand in her voice. ‘You heard your grandfather. Wait until after we’ve eaten.’

  ‘Right.’ He lowered his brown head to gaze into his soup cup and Tanya knew his sudden interest in his father would erupt the minute the dessert dishes were cleared. She wasn’t quite ready to acknowledge to the rest of the family her intentions to write Jake asking him to come home.

  A quick glance at Julia Lassiter’s averted gaze indicated the source of the slight chill in the air. Tanya sighed inwardly, guessing that she must have thought the reprimand uncalled-for when John was only going to inquire about his father. She had to admit to herself that it probably was, but she didn’t want Jake’s name spoiling her dinner as it undoubtedly would.

  ‘Before you and John arrived tonight,’ J.D. had picked up the conversation again with the adroitness of an expert at table talk, ‘we were discussing the possibilities of having a small dinner party to celebrate our thirty-fifth wedding anniversary on the eighth of May.’

  ‘I think that’s an excellent idea,’ Tanya agreed.

  ‘I’m glad you think so,’ J.D. nodded with a twinkle. ‘Mother thought it would be in bad taste to initiate a party on behalf of our own anniversary. Normally she seeks any excuse to entertain.’

  ‘Weather permitting, Julia, we could have it out on the patio. All your spring flowers would be blooming by then and it would be ideal,’ Tanya suggested, noticing the grudging agreement gleaming in her mother-in-law’s eyes.

>   ‘And you could do some of that baked trout that I like so well,’ J.D. interposed, ‘and serve the meal buffet style.’

  The topics of guests, food, and decorations for the proposed party dominated the conversation through the salad course, the exquisitely prepared standing rib roast and the crême-de-menthe parfait. The telephone rang just as Julia was about to serve their after-dinner coffee in the living room, and Tanya was delegated to pour while her mother-in-law went to answer it. The caller wanted to speak to J.D., which left Tanya and Patrick alone together as little John had dashed off to his room on some secret errand.

  ‘Patrick Tanya nervously cupped her hands around the delicate china receptacle, tossing her tawny brown hair over her shoulder with a flick of her head, ‘when you were in Africa — did you see Jake?’

  A lightning quick glance was darted at her as he leaned against the back of the sofa. ‘Yes, yes, I did.’ His dark gaze showed the same intense interest in the black liquid in his cup as she did.

  ‘The project he’s working on, how is it coming along?’ It was cheating, she knew, to try to determine what the chances were that Jake might take her up on the invitation she was about to issue that he return home, but she had to know.

  ‘Which one?’ Patrick asked dryly. ‘The one he’s finishing or the one that’s just starting?’

  Relief raced through her and unknowingly she sighed. ‘I didn’t know he was working on two different projects. It must keep him very busy.’

  ‘Lonnie Danvers is a very capable assistant, but Jake still has to do a lot of commuting between sites, at least for the time being.’

  Tanya was glad of Julia’s return. It saved her from explaining the reason for her questions, and the curious glint in Patrick’s eyes had indicated that he was about to ask it. J.D. entered the room within seconds of his wife, sent her a quick smile of apology, and launched into a brief business discussion with Patrick that excluded the two women.

  As Julia seemed preoccupied with some thoughts of her own, Tanya took the opportunity to study the dark-haired man sitting opposite her now that the prospect of Jake’s returning to the States seemed so remote. During the years she had lived with her in-laws, she had noticed the way so many people kowtowed to the Lassiters’ wealth and power. One of the first things she had admired about Patrick Raines was his refusal to give lip service to J.D. Lassiter. He was his own man and never hesitated to voice an objection and stick with it if his views didn’t match those of the firm’s owner. Yet Patrick wasn’t so independent that he wouldn’t seek the older man’s advice and experience if he felt he needed it. There was more than just charm and intelligence behind the handsome facade that drew Tanya.

  A small hand touched her shoulder. She glanced up into a pair of clear blue eyes.

  ‘Can we go and do it now, Mom?’ His oblique request only made sense to Tanya.

  ‘Go and do what, dear?’ Julia inserted, her slightly raised voice drawing the attention of the two men.

  ‘I’m going to write my father a letter asking him to come home on his vacation.’ His young voice was filled with importance.

  Tanya studied the proud tilt of his head, a rosy hue colouring her cheeks as she felt the eyes in the room looking at her. Patrick had only guessed at her animosity towards her husband, but his parents knew of its existence. Their curiosity about her reaction to John’s announcement weighted the silence.

  ‘I think that’s an excellent idea, Johnny,’ Julia Lassiter said firmly, the tone of her voice daring Tanya to disagree.

  The slight flush receded as Tanya turned her cool amber gaze towards her mother-in-law, her marble smooth features composed. ‘So do I, Julia,’ she agreed with freezing calm, ‘which is why I suggested it to John.’

  She wanted no further discussion on the matter, no psuedo-innocent delving by Julia into her motives or even by J.D., so she rose from her chair, resting a hand on John’s slim shoulders as she guided him out of the living room.

  ‘You want to write the letter, don’t you?’ the boy asked hesitantly when they had arrived in the alcove off Tanya’s bedroom.

  ‘Yes, John,’ she smiled down at him, swallowing the distaste in her mouth the words caused. From what Patrick had said, there was little chance that Jake would come or could come. A twinge of guilt raced through her as she forced herself to be cheerful. ‘We’ll both write to him.’

  John fumbled in his shirt pocket, finally withdrawing a photograph which he handed to her. ‘I thought we could send along this picture Grandfather took when I got my new bike … so Father will know what I look like.’

  John wasn’t the only one in the picture. Tanya was there too, laughing into the camera, her dark blonde hair ruffled by the wind and looking every inch a sophisticated, well-bred member of society, and hardly the mother of the young boy astride the bicycle.

  ‘He has your school pictures, John,’ she reminded him gently, strangely unwilling to send the photograph in her hand.

  ‘But they don’t look like me and I had a tooth missing,’ he protested. ‘Please, can’t we send it?’

  With that pair of pleading blue eyes looking at her, Tanya knew she would always give in. A part of her admitted, however reluctantly, that John was getting to the age where he needed the strong guiding hand of a man, something that was his father’s responsibility.

  An hour later the feelings of guilt that she had deprived John of his father had subsided as she sealed the envelope containing the letters from John and herself. His was a heart-tugging, scrawling message politely inquiring if his father could come home this summer. Hers was as simple, stating John’s sudden doubts that he really had a father and impersonally adding that perhaps Jake should come home for a few weeks if his work would permit it. With the airmail stamp on the envelope, Tanya felt the pinpricks of her conscience had been assuaged. She loathed Jake Lassiter for the things he had done in the past, but for John’s sake she would tolerate his presence — if Jake came. And Tanya was almost positive he wouldn’t.

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  Chapter Two

  ’YOU LOOK BEAUTIFUL, Mom,’ John declared as Tanya set the portable television on top of the small desk in his bedroom.

  ‘Do you like the dress?’ A graceful pirouette sent the orange-flame chiffon of the skirt swirling about her knees. Her long, streaked tawny-blonde hair was brushed back from her forehead and behind her ears where two simple hoops of gold dangled from her lobes. ‘I bought it especially for your grandparents’ anniversary party tonight.’

  ‘It’s terrific. I wish I could go to the party,’ he sighed.

  ‘And think of the television programmes you’ll miss. I think the movie tonight is a western,’ Tanya teased.

  ‘Is it?’ His eyes lit up. John was typically boy when it came to westerns. Most other programmes bored him as he preferred to generate his own adventures.

  ‘Some of the guests will have already arrived. You’ll be all right, won’t you?’ she smiled.

  ‘Sure,’ he shrugged off-handedly.

  ‘Lights out at ten o’clock,’ Tanya reminded him. ‘I’ll be back to make sure they are.’

  ‘Okay, Mom,’ he grinned as she lifted her hand in goodbye before stepping out of his room into the hallway.

  They both knew it was an excuse to return at ten because John considered himself too old to be tucked in although neither one wanted to discontinue the nightly ritual.

  The rooms of the one-storey ranch-style home that Tanya and John occupied were in a separate wing of the house, originally to be used as guest rooms with the Lassiters’ master suite on the other side of the house. Now they were more or less separate apartments, minus kitchen privileges, which enabled John and Tanya to have some degree of privacy.

  The structure itself, a blend of native stone and wood, was situated on the point of a finger of land jutting into Table Rock Lake. The sheltered cove of water contained a private dock and enclosed boathouse. There were no neighbours as J. D. Lassiter had purc
hased the adjoining land to ensure his privacy and isolation. Any invitation to the home was treated as a royal summons and was never declined, hence the houseful of guests that evening.

  The doorbell rang as Tanya’s heels clicked on to the tiled foyer. ‘I’ll answer it, Julia,’ she called, hearing her mother-in-law’s footsteps approaching from the kitchen. She swung the embossed wood entrance door wide, admitting Patrick Raines and the petite, dark-haired girl who accompanied him.

  ‘Sheila, I’m so glad you could come!’ Tanya exclaimed, reaching out to grasp the ringed hand of Patrick’s sister. ‘Your dress is divine,’ she added, taking in the white eyelet lace gown that complemented the young girl’s dark beauty.

  ‘It’s terribly colourless next to yours,’ Sheila commented, a glint of envy and something else in her brown eyes as she made a quick and thorough appraisal of Tanya’s appearance.

  There was only four years’ difference in their ages, Sheila being twenty-two, but Tanya never felt she was accepted by Patrick’s sister. Tonight there was even a smug sort of glitter in the dark gaze that made Tanya believe her welcome for the girl should have been a bit more cool and sophisticated.

  ‘We aren’t late, are we?’ Patrick enquired, his blandness overridden by the admiring expression in his eyes as they wandered over the long orange-red sleeves and the low scooped neckline of Tanya’s dress.

  ‘Not at all. The others are out on the patio.’

  The foyer — Julia preferred to call it a breezeway — ran the full width of the house, culminating in sliding glass doors that opened on to the patio and the surrounding rock garden. With the lake less than a hundred yards away, there had never been a swimming pool installed. Julia Lassiter hadn’t wanted it anyway for fear it would spoil the aesthetic effect of her garden.