WOLF (Wolf River Book 1)

by Alaska Angelini

  My eyebrows drew in and I paused just a little too long. Alex’s arm swept around my waist and he was rushing us to the cabin at a swift pace.

  “What do you mean by that?” I struggled to get down, but his grip was too secure. The door knob caught in his hand and he let out a threatening sound as he lowered me.

  “Unlock it.”

  “Answer me. What do mean, I won’t be laughing? Do you really think something will happen this time, or are you speculating? Because last time, no one told me anything happened. As far as I know, it was a peaceful fucking night. I wanted to ask you if you heard anything, but you were nowhere to be found.”

  A sigh came from his mouth and he turned, scanning the woods to the side of us.

  “There’s no telling if something will happen or not, but you’re not going to risk it. You,” he said, reaching into the pockets of my tan slacks, “are going to be locked away inside of this cabin. You are not going to take a step out of here no matter what.”

  I stepped back, dislodging his hand. “The keys are in my purse, in the car.”

  Alex took off jogging and I glanced behind me, scanning the darkness within the trees. It was getting late. Soon, it’d be dark and I’d have to hear the damn howling again. I didn’t want to admit it to Alex, but I knew the wolves were there. I could hear them howling at odd times. I had thought for a while that they’d gone away, but the last week it had started up again.

  Alex reappeared, handing over my purse. I grabbed out the keys, unlocking the door so we could both go in. But he didn’t come. He stood in the doorway with his head down. Snowflakes were settling on his hair and I bit my lip so as not to reach forward to brush them free. It killed me that he was clearly so upset and he wouldn’t tell me his thoughts.

  “O-kay…” I dragged out the word, gripping the edge of the door. “I guess you’re not coming in.”

  “I,” he paused. “Can’t.”

  His voice was so low I could barely hear him.

  “Why can’t you?”

  “You don’t understand.”

  “So tell me and then I will.”

  He took a step back, putting more distance between us. “I can’t do that either. Lock your door. Both locks. Whatever you do, don’t answer it. Not to anyone. Not tonight and sure as fuck not tomorrow. Do like you did the last full moon and stay indoors.” His jaw started clenching again and his features drew in as he continued to stare at the ground. “I help a man with his cattle in the next town over. He’s pretty close to the border and they’ve been attacked before. I’ll be back late Friday night so I won’t be here, but you have to promise me that you’ll listen to what I’m saying.”

  I could tell he didn’t want to go. The emotions he displayed had my fingers twitching. If I could just touch him. Comfort him any way that I could. “Okay. I promise.”

  Alex peeked up, giving me a glimpse of his eyes again. With as much as I wanted to stare into them, he didn’t give me time.

  “You have no idea how much I’ve hated staying away from you. I don’t want to. I can’t stand it and … I think if you thought that I didn’t care.... Just know that it’s not you, it’s me.”

  Only then did he meet my gaze. There was such sadness, such heartbreaking loneliness that I suddenly knew what it was. I had suspected before, but now it was obvious. “You don’t have to push me away, Alex. I know you’re afraid of your PTSD, but I’m not scared. I want to spend time with you. I … like you. I like you a lot. Maybe a little too much,” I breathed out.

  He stepped forward at quick pace, wrapping his arm around me and pulling me into his hard body. “Dammit, Erin. You weren’t supposed to say that.” His lips pressed to the top of my head. “I like you more. Too much, too.”

  In that moment, I could have melted. I’d missed his smell. Missed everything about the way he felt against me. That night we spent together had changed something inside of me. After the guilt surfaced, it didn’t stay. Even regret wouldn’t sink in all the way. I just couldn’t help the feelings he brought out in me.

  “I shouldn’t …” He got quiet, groaning and holding me to him tighter. “I want to do dinner again on Friday night. You and me.”

  “Really?”

  “I can’t stay away much longer. I just can’t. Friday.”

  Before I could say any more, he kissed me. It was light and quick, but the contact alone stirred strong emotions. It left me blinking through the confusion that swamped me as he let go and hurried away. I couldn’t stand how he’d isolated himself again. I knew it had to do with his condition and I hadn’t wanted him to endure that kind of pain when I was more than willing to be there for him. I also knew, I wouldn’t be here forever. Maybe not even much longer. The realization was hard to face, but I couldn’t help but want to see where this could go. He had a fire inside of him that called to me. For the first time in forever, I didn’t want to consider the consequences. I just wanted to burn.

  Chapter 14

  Alex

  There were moments throughout my life that I thought things could never get harder or more complicated. But they always did. I’d get through one hurdle, only for another to come barreling along. I finally thought things were going to get better for me, until Erin showed up.

  What do you do when what you wanted most was the same thing your evil side yearned for?

  I only knew one thing and that was what my heart told me. You do what is best for the person involved.

  Staying away from Erin was the hardest thing I had ever done up to this point. Even though I saw her every day and watched her every night for weeks, it wasn’t enough to keep me or my wolf content. We both craved her interaction, the taste of her skin. I was lost, yet finally found. Every day was harder than the next. Seeing her smile. Seeing her upset. It pained every bit of the man I was. No, the man I knew I could be, if only given the chance. But I wouldn’t allow him happiness if it meant my wolf would destroy it. But would he? And should I be denied what I wanted if Erin obviously wanted it to? Fuck, I had tried to so hard and it was all for nothing.

  I was weak. There was no other excuse. I knew the chances and I’d poured my bleeding feelings out to her and she’d confirmed her own damnation by admitting she liked me back. And I had caved—letting myself invited her back into my life. Back for dinner. Jesus, help me, I was a horrible person to not put her safety above my own greed.

  My head shook as I squeezed into the steering wheel. It was done. There was no going back now. Even as I had sat outside of her house last night, watching the perimeter, I couldn’t deny the truth—I couldn’t be without her. Not her presence, or her attention. I needed her with me. All of her. Whatever that meant, I’d have to face when the time came.

  As for the rest….

  I let the information I’d collected over the last few weeks filter though. Aside from the wolves stalking the forest by Erin’s home, I never let them get close enough to breach her property line. They knew I was there and they weren’t stupid enough to get within distance when it was so close to the full moon. But what would happen tonight when I wasn’t present to make sure?

  It scared the hell out of me. It made my wolf even more violent, which convinced me without a doubt that I needed to lock myself away. I didn’t want to, but I knew if she saw me in this state or if I had access to her, she might end up dead anyway. It’d been so fucking hard to restrain myself the first full moon. Especially after having her, but by some miracle at the last minute, I’d set the lock. Tonight, I was asking for trouble if I didn’t follow through with my plan.

  As for going out of town for my job, Erin would never know the difference. If she came looking for me, she’d wouldn’t find where I was hidden.

  The story I told her was easy enough to stage. Even now as I drove, I couldn’t help but think how perfect this set up could be.

  My dad’s hunting land on the outskirts gave me the perfect place to park my truck. The woods led all the way back home and I could easily slip into my cag
e without her knowing the difference. I’d still be close enough to appease my wolf through the change. It worked.

  Sweat poured down my face and neck as I told myself this was how it had to be. It just was. I pulled at my shirt even as my wolf said it could be different. He just wanted her. The need to kill her wasn’t priority, but I refused to believe him. He wasn’t to be trusted any more than the pack that had their sights set on Erin. It only took a split second for things to change. Giving in wasn’t worth it. Maybe in time, but that was yet to be seen.

  A tremor raced down my side and I cursed through the stubbornness of my wolf. It wasn’t even dark yet and he was already fighting to get back to her. A car passed and I slowed as my turn approached. The drive had only been a good ten minutes, but it felt as if I’d been driving forever. The running would help. There, I wouldn’t be contained. But being caged was coming. I knew it and that’s what made this even harder.

  The dirt road appeared that led to my father’s land. It made my skin crawl even more being so close to the scene of my own near-death experience. This was the second time I’d been here since the attack and I couldn’t help but wonder if my father came out here anymore? I doubted it. I was half surprised he hadn’t sold the acreage just to get rid of any reminders of me.

  “Shit.” I let out a deep breath as my thoughts were disrupted at the sight of crosses sitting next to the gate. They hadn’t been there before. Fuck, I didn’t want to be here. My eyes searched the path that went ahead and I swallowed past the apprehension that someone might be here. Had I thought this was the perfect plan?

  I climbed out of the truck cautiously, removing the hidden key my dad had yet to take back. The lock opened in my palm and I swung the gate wide, driving my truck in before re-securing it behind me. The quarter mile to the clearing had my heart racing even faster. There were no vehicles within sight and they would have parked here. The crosses had to have come within the last week.

  I pulled deep in the trees, not bothering to lock my doors before I shoved my keys in my pocket. My eyes went right, to where the attack occurred. Nausea roiled in my gut and I took off in a sprint. The cold air against my face helped, but with the amount of heat against my back, I could have believed my demons were truly chasing me. I couldn’t get away from the area fast enough.

  The incline came and went and I kept pushing myself harder until I wound down by the river. I could follow it all the way to my house. No one lived between here and there. The occasional fisherman were out and about, but I didn’t expect anyone to be today. Not when they knew what would come once the sun went down.

  Pants escaped my mouth and I continued on, lost in thoughts of Erin and our upcoming dinner … and of a future I shouldn’t be considering. It wasn’t like she’d stay, but if she did, what would she be like in everyday life to live with? Did she ever take time off from burying herself in cases? What were her interests or hobbies? Did she want to get married and have children? She’d been engaged before, so marriage obviously hadn’t been too off-putting to her, but things had changed when she lost Martin. It was obvious how tough she was. Was she open to it anymore?

  Stupid question. Like I should even be thinking that route. It was way too early. Besides, it was impossible. What was I going to do, park at my dad’s land every freaking month and build a cage out here? I couldn’t keep going back to my place with her inside. She’d catch me at some point. As for a family, I couldn’t risk attempting that one. There was no telling what would happen if…

  My feet slowed as nausea hit me harder. I hadn’t used protection with her. Surely, she was on something. She would have said otherwise that night, wouldn’t she have? God, I was the most irresponsible person in the world. I knew she couldn’t turn into a werewolf while I was in human form, but I never considered pregnancy. No…. Erin was responsible. She’d be on something.

  Pain bit into the back of my thigh and I jerked to a stop, turning to look down at the stinging sensation. My eyes widened in panic at the sight of the dart sticking out from my jeans. My legs was already going numb and tingling from whatever poison was being emitted into my system.

  You’re going to be okay. It won’t hurt you. You’re a—

  Thoughts faded and my eyes rolled as I felt myself sway. I was going down. Somehow in my mind I knew that. I hit the ground hard, only knowing I connected because of the air locking in my chest from the impact. Even as the footsteps approached, I couldn’t open my lids to see who was standing near me. Smell wouldn’t even register. I waited for them to speak. To say something. Before they managed a word … darkness.

  ****

  “No!”

  My eyes jerked open at the cracking I could feel jolting my limbs. Heat blazed over the surface of my skin and I clawed down my neck and chest as my bones shifted and snapped. Tears rolled free from my eyes due to the pain, but I somehow managed to push myself to my knees as the twinges raced through me like electrical currents.

  Fuck, I had to get out of here. I had to lock myself away before I hurt Erin or someone else.

  Blindly, I removed the dart, glancing into the night sky as I tried to gauge the time. It was late. Seven-ish? Eight? Shit, I didn’t know. My wolf was howling inside of me, ready to be set free in the one place he’d longed for for years. He felt freedom within grasp and he was ready to take it for all it was worth.

  Vertigo had me stumbling to the left as I tried to stand. Again, my body seized through the adjustments, causing me to yell out in agony. This wasn’t happening. This couldn’t happen! Who the fuck had shot me and just left me on my own?

  The questions came, but an answer didn’t as I staggered forward. My mouth was so dry that I could barely swallow. What the hell had been on that dart? I’d swallowed a bottle of pills and didn’t even pass out. Whatever the person had given me was strong. Too strong to get over the counter somewhere.

  My hand lifted to rub my eyes to try to bring them into focus, but halfway up, the pain crippled me. I hit the ground again, rolling as the bones in my face moved under my skin. With the transition, it was a domino effect. I was done for. There was no stopping me now. My wolf was coming and it had every intention of going after only one person.

  I’d kill tonight. I knew that in the very bones that were getting me ready for her.

  A deep yell turned into a growl as I felt the thrashing that was common with my change. My back bowed against the earth and the material of my clothes shredded loudly to my sensitive ears. Erin’s name was repeating in my head, making me deaf to everything but the identification of my prey. Over and over the mantra looped until the torment stopped. And just like that, the world went silent.

  Chapter 15

  Erin

  The hysterical cries of Mrs. Morrison echoed through the home, knotting my stomach as I took in the other two sets of parents present. I had promised Alex I wouldn’t leave the cabin and although I had every intention of staying locked inside for my own safety, I never expected to get a call from Gregory Morrison. He was frantic, yelling and sobbing over the phone about their youngest son not making it home from his trip to the store with his friends. He was supposed to be home before dark, but it was a good hour after sunset and he was nowhere to be found.

  “Please calm, everyone,” I said, softly. “The sheriff is out looking for them, as is Detective Perkins. I’m sure the boys just got sidetracked and will be coming back any minute now.”

  “You don’t understand,” Kitty cried out. “James knows better. He knows to be inside the house before sunset. He knows,” she repeated, breaking down even more.

  “So does, Riley,” another woman called out. “Something’s not right. He wouldn’t have wanted to upset me and his father this way.”

  My fists flexed as I glanced at the clock. For not believing in silly things like werewolves, I still couldn’t shake the feeling as though something bad was going to happen. Maybe it was the vibes I was getting from everyone, or how genuine their fear was. All I knew was that my i
nstincts were flaring, and I’d made sure to bring my weapon and plenty of ammunition.

  “Dustin wouldn’t have done this either,” Megan Pratts said, wrapping her arms around her husband’s waiting form.

  All three couples were upset and I felt helpless as I stood, waiting. The boys were young. Two were thirteen while the oldest boy, Riley, was fourteen. From what I gathered from all the parents, walking to the local convenience store was something they did out of boredom. They’d buy a bag of chips, maybe some candy. This trip had started off just like any other. Now they were missing. I’d seen it before. Too many times. The only difference was the identity of the killer and the fact that all three were missing. Whether this attacker was man or animal, I wasn’t sure, but I was leaning more toward animal now that I’d actually met someone who’d been attacked by this thing. Alex.

  I turned, pulling out my phone and walking deeper into the living room. Another sob echoed in the background and Mrs. Pratts hugged tighter to her husband. I pushed in Detective Perkin’s number and waited as it began to ring. When he didn’t answer, I tried to stop the anger that flared. Dammit, I missed being a detective sometimes. I liked the steady stream of action. The scenes were hard at times, but I got satisfaction in solving cases and putting the bad guys away. Now I couldn’t necessarily do that. Sure, I solved cases, but not the way I loved. I felt helpless.

  My phone rang and I hit the button.

  “Investigator Billings, you called?”

  Relief flooded me at the detective’s voice.

  “Yes, I was wondering if you’d come across the kids, yet? Their parents are extremely upset,” I said lowly.

  “Nothing yet, but we’re looking. It’s only a mile and a half walk from the store and back. Mr. Morrison said they always stayed on the main road to avoid the woods. There’s not a soul in sight anywhere that I’ve seen. This place looks like a ghost town.”