Blindsided (The Fighter Series Book 1)

by Matson, TC

  Without warning, he takes my face and captures my mouth. Unprepared and mixed with frayed emotions, I kiss him back. It’s gentle as he passionately breathes deeply into me, but quickly it turns hasty and becomes forceful pulling me into him as his hands wander to unauthorized territory. Familiar sensations bring me back to reality. Twinges of pain braided with love tangle with the flashback of him and the blonde.

  I wrench back and jump to my feet. “No!” I yell straightening my shirt. “You won’t do this to me. What you did years ago was unforgiveable. And now that I know you had planned to propose to me, it’s even more fucking appalling. Take me home!” I throw the ring at him and turn stalking off.

  “Paige,” he says twisting me around. “Tell me you didn’t just feel that? Tell me it’s not still there and I’ll leave you alone.”

  I open my mouth to reply, but I don’t know what to say.

  Instinctively, I slap him. Tears welling, I harden my eyes. “I felt it alright. That tingling feeling we had when we fell in love, the wondrous explosion of love we had. It doesn’t hold a fucking candle to the crushing feeling I had when I walked in on you. I loved you, Wesley!” My voice cracks. The years of anger and pain rear their heads and like a dam, I burst.

  He wraps his arms around my shoulders and pulls me into him, securing me from my wobbly knees as sobs rack my body. I ball my fist and pound his chest. “I didn’t deserve it. I gave you everything.” I cry into his chest. “Damn you, Wesley. I didn’t fucking deserve it.” I say between breaths.

  He places faint kisses against the top of my head, holding me. “I’m so sorry, Paige,” he says quietly.

  Years of hurt are unchained, streams of tears flow, and anger releases becoming a form of forgiveness. I curse him and continue to cry into his chest while he silently stands there, allowing me to get it all out. I did the same damn thing years ago when it happened, but instead I was wrapped in Blain’s arms, not the asshole who caused the pain.

  Flashbacks storm my memory. Us. Him. Her. It’s overwhelming and I glance up from under my matted wet lashes. “Take me home,” I sniff wiping my cheeks.

  Chapter 33

  Last night fogged me up and brought back memories that opened wounds I thought were scars. Once Wesley pulled up to my Dad’s, I asked him to leave me alone. I’ll never be able to forgive him for what he did years ago, and I sure as hell can’t forget the pain he caused. It all hurts too much. Wesley. Levi. I’m all bemused, treading through the mud of my life.

  After waking up, I spent all day with Dad then decided to head home just before dinnertime. That way he didn’t have to cook another meal, secretively convincing me to stay another night. I wouldn’t have minded it, but I need to get back home and deal with reality.

  Pulling into the driveway my pulse stops. Cars are parked everywhere, lights on with silhouettes of bodies moving behind the blinds. Blain didn’t know when I was coming home. I quietly sit in the dark watching the shadows trying to figure out who they belong to, but this is useless.

  I step through the door with my bag on my shoulder, nervous as hell, and scan the crowd. Relief washes over me as I only recognize Jason and nod, then spotting Blain with wide eyes I wave. I turn starting down the hallway catching out of the corner of my eye a very familiar face and stop in my spot. Adam’s expression blanches sitting on the other side of the island with a beer frozen in motion.

  I don’t wait to see if Levi is close by when I rush down the hallway and push my door open. As I flip on my light, I screech at the sight of a sleeping Levi in my bed, lying on top of the covers with his hands behind his head. Immediately, he lunges up.

  “What the fuck are you doing in my bed?” My voice hits an octave so high the neighborhood dogs had to have heard it.

  “Hello to you too,” he says throwing his legs over the side of the bed.

  “No hellos. Get out!” I shout.

  “No,” he says dead serious.

  I sharpen my eyes on him then twirl around headed for the guys in the living room for help. A firm grip grabs me and spins me around. His eyes burn with determination and are laced with anger. “You don’t get to walk away. You left me without the option to explain a thing.”

  “There isn’t any explaining, Levi. I saw what I saw. I’m done. We’re done. Now get out.” I yank my arm from his and push past him to the other side of my room.

  “No. I deserve to be heard,” he gruffs.

  “That’s where you’re wrong. Be seen not heard,” I bark.

  “Isn’t that what women are supposed to do?” He cracks up at his horrible comeback that only adds fuel to my fire. Shaking his laugh away, he points to the bed. “Paige, sit the hell down and listen to me. I’ve let you have your time. I left you alone and was worried sick not knowing a damn thing. Now give me twenty minutes of your fucking time.”

  I glare at him for a moment realizing there’s no way around this and huff dropping to the bed. Ironic that this is the second time in two days I’m getting the “let me explain” speech.

  “I didn’t know she was going to do it. If I did, it wouldn’t have happened. I—”

  “You didn’t even try stopping her,” I squeak drowning in emotions.

  “I didn’t know what to do!” he barks. “Standing in front of the photographers, national television, and everyone and their fucking mothers. What the hell was I supposed to do? I choked.”

  “Why should I believe you? I mean, you two have history…on and off again history. You said it yourself. She was your fallback.”

  “Yeah, when I was single. Paige, I’m not single. I have a girlfriend. You. I have no need for a fallback. I haven’t thought about being anywhere else except in your arms. You want proof go ask Adam. He was there when I told her to leave and he was there when she confessed to her ridiculous plan.”

  “He’ll vouch for you. Bros before hoes. I know how that works,” I snort.

  “I love how much of a smartass you are,” he fires off. “You have no fucking idea, do you?”

  I flick my eyes up burning holes into him. “That I shouldn’t have gotten involved with you? Oh I caught on to that quick.”

  “Would you stop acting like a….” he pauses and a growl thunders from his chest. “I told you I wanted you and I meant it. I tried texting you that night.”

  “To cover your bases,” I snap.

  He squints rocking his head from shoulder to shoulder. “Is that what you think? I was covering my bases? Paige, I was hours away from you. I didn’t have to tell you shit. I could have fucked her against my bathroom door and you wouldn’t have known a thing. I told you about her. I told you she was poison.” He blinks the anger away replacing it with compassion and crouches in front of me. “Look…you have to believe me.”

  I squeeze my eyes shut and pinch the bridge of my nose begging for the tears to stay at bay. I’m so confused. First Wesley’s confession and now Levi’s insisting he’s innocent.

  “Paige, I can assure you it will never happen again. Never,” he says thick with devotion.

  “Wesley showed up while I was gone.” I don’t know why that just spewed from me.

  I watch his eyes darken, and his lips form a hard line as he stands and runs a hand through his ink black hair. “Is this where you tell me that your douchebag ex came back and won your heart over? Because if it is I need to know now so I can give Adam my bail money.”

  “No,” I tell him. “I just wanted you to know before someone else did.”

  “Anything happen?” he huffs.

  “No,” I lie. “We had a long overdue talk. That’s all.”

  “Good, glad you two could patch shit up. Now onto bigger and much better things. Me. You. Us.” He waves his hands between us. “You need—”

  “Hey, man!” Adam yells pounding on the door and I swear my heart falls inches from a cardiac arrest.

  “What?” Levi groans never taking his hardened gaze off me.

  “Put your shit back in your pants and come on. We need t
o take off.”

  Levi exhales an aggravated laugh. “Give me a second.” Then he clutches my hand. “The ball is in your court. I can’t do anything else but beg you, and I sure as hell am not walking away without a fight.”

  “I need time to think,” I state.

  “You were gone for three days.” He sounds surprised.

  “I don’t know what to do!”

  “Quit running.” I glance up to him irked by the statement. “Paige, I’m not your past. I’m trying to make you my future.”

  “Just give me some time, Levi.” I sigh.

  He places a kiss on the top of my head and leaves me sitting on the bed without a further word shutting the door quietly behind him. It’s then my dam bursts, yet again. I hold my head and cry.

  “How was your trip?” Blain asks standing in my doorway.

  I wipe my cheeks. “Interesting.” I try giving him a confident smile.

  “How’s Pops?”

  “He’s good,” I snuff.

  “I didn’t know you were coming back tonight. What’s with you two?”

  “I don’t know. I don’t fucking know anymore. I should have known better.” Anger begins pulling the hurt from my voice.

  “Paigey, I’m staying out of your business, but I think it’s ridiculous you’re comparing him to what’s happened before. Sometimes love comes with a price and a fight. You’re the price he’s willing to fight for. Stop and pay attention. We’re all not bad.” He pauses compelling me to look up to him. He’s leaning his shoulder on the doorframe with his arms crossed and a frown on his face. “And for fuck’s sake, quit running. Find my Paige that stands tall.” He pushes off and leaves.

  I know I’m running. But from what? My past or my future? I shake my head and fall back onto my bed staring at the ceiling. The answer is both. It’s wrong of me to compare Levi to Wesley, but the pain matches just the same.

  Chapter 34

  I’m giving Paige some time, just as she asked. This shit is working my nerves over, stretching them thin. I’m refraining from scooping her up and running away—because I’m sure that’s considered kidnapping. So instead, I devised a plan. One that guarantees she won’t be getting me out of her mind any time soon. Girls like flowers, cards, candies and all that shit. My Paige isn’t any different, or at least I hope she isn’t because everywhere she turns the next few days will be a reminder of me.

  I’ve set it up that she gets a different flower every day at both of her jobs and at home. I did some research and did you know that flowers have certain meanings? Yeah…I didn’t care either, but I went with the ones I thought she’d like.

  Sure I’ve texted her here and there to feel things out. I have no idea what’s running through her mind, and right now I’m not feeling anything from her. My head hurts and my frigging dick is throbbing for some action. Eleven days. Eleven very long, very stressful days. I’ve been so good that I haven’t even taken a “taking care of business” shower. Why? For some reason, I want to save what I have for Paige. Cold showers and hard training sessions are helping keep my head in the game.

  Me: How is your day?

  It’s an odd feeling to stare at your phone with anticipation unsure when someone will text you back. It’s like when you were a kid brave enough to get in line to the biggest roller coaster, then your turn is up. You’re next. You can’t pussy out in front of your friends so you have to board the wild beast, grit your teeth and hang the hell on.

  Paige: Rosy.

  Ha! Yes, today is white rose day for her.

  Me: I should come by and make it splendid.

  Paige: I’m a big girl.

  Me: With big girl panties?

  Paige: Big huge creamy white ones. Butt covered up to my shoulder blades.

  Me: You’re wishing I’d take them off right now aren’t you? I’ll be there in ten.

  Paige: In your dreams.

  Me: In my dreams you’re not wearing panties.

  Paige: Not going there.

  Me: Sorry sweetheart, you’re there.

  Paige: I’m going to go.

  And with that, I’m happy. Why? ‘Cause I know she’s smiling like an idiot staring at her phone. I’m drowning her thoughts, slowly knocking down the wall that she’s put back up. She can’t resist me. I won’t let her. I warned her I wouldn’t leave without a fight, and I meant it. I’ve only begun my plan. I close my eyes contemplating my next move, only to be sucked away into the black hole of sleep.

  My eyes bolt open at the sound of my phone alerting me that I have a text. The sun is blasting through the curtains, blaring me in the eyes as I scramble to find my phone. The suspense to see if it’s Paige seeps away as Adam’s name pops up on the display. I groan dropping my head back on the pillow and stretching my limbs. As bad as I want to pound on the bag, I’m fucking exhausted…mentally.

  Adam’s text was ten minutes ago, which means he should be knocking on the door any second. Wait for it. It’s coming. Knock, knock…told ya. Right on cue. Adam pushes a cup of coffee in my hand and walks past me without saying a word. He’s in a hat and gym pants—very un-Adam-like.

  “Good morning, hot stuff,” I tease.

  He grunts dropping down on the rock hard blue couch. Some hotels have amazing furniture, others have bricks, but this one is cement blocks.

  “I take it you had a wonderful night?” I ask.

  “Let’s just say I missed a smoking hot opportunity because I was so drunk my dick couldn’t see straight.”

  I toss my head back laughing.

  “Shit isn’t funny! Two chicks. Two smoking ass bitches and I pass out before shit could go down.”

  Oh, he’s pissed.

  “That right there,” I say between hyena laughs, “how you feel is the reason this guy doesn’t drink. I’m the guy who doesn’t botch up smoking hot opportunities, especially two in one night.”

  He sharpens his eyes. “Would you care to rephrase that since you kissed another woman botching up your smoking hot opportunity?” he chuckles under his breath.

  “I knew that was coming. But, my friend, my dick and I have an understanding. No limp shit here.”

  He rolls his eyes and takes a swig from his coffee. “I haven’t been that fucked up in years.”

  “Are you sure there were two or was there just one and you were seeing a double?” I crack up.

  He ponders it for a moment then his shoulders begin to shake from laughter. “Fuck off.”

  I take the moment and head to the room to grab my things, picking my phone up.

  Me: Morning Tulip. Hope you slept good.

  What? She’s on my mind. Sue me. Almost immediately, a reply. I grin. I must be on her mind.

  Paige: Please tell me that’s not a warning for things to come.

  Me: I may or may not have dreamt about you.

  Paige: Have a good day.

  I hate having to sit in the doghouse in the rain, tethered to it by a chain. Fuck this. After the gym, I’m not standing under the tree. I’m going to pop in. Let her see me. Let her soak it in because, quite frankly, she fucking loves what she sees.

  Gym—check. Shower—check. Now I’m sitting here like a stalker watching her in her backyard soaking up the sun in a neon blue bikini with her ear buds in. I’m certain if I walk out there I’ll scare the hell out of her, so instead I call. I watch her grab her phone and look at the display. Taking a deep breath she pulls the buds out and answers.

  “Hello?”

  “It’s hot as hell outside.”

  “Thank you, meteorologist Levi, for alerting me. Is this your new profession?”

  “Only if there’s fighting involved.”

  She’s smiling. I’ve missed seeing that. “What do you want, Levi?”

  I pull open the sliding glass door and step out. “To see if you needed sunscreen on your back.”

  She twists around. I can’t see her eyes behind the dark sunglasses but her mouth is wide open. “What are you doing here?”

  I remove
my phone from my face. “We don’t have to use these anymore.” Sliding a chair beside her, I tug my shirt over my head and take a seat, resting my head on the back. “I needed company.”

  Out of the corner of my eyes hidden by my own sunglasses I watch her stare at me for a moment, then lay back in her chair. Silence cascades around us. It’s just the birds in the distance and the sound of sizzling skin. Ok, maybe not the sound, but I sure as hell feel like I’m frying.

  Just being beside her makes me feel complete and much happier.

  “Paige?” I quietly break the silence.

  “Hmm…”

  “I didn’t mean to hurt you.” I’m ardent as I’ve ever been. It’s not forced but instead fueled by the thump in my chest.

  She reaches over and grips my hand, not yet looking my way. “I know you didn’t, Levi.”

  I squeeze the tiny hand in mine. “So the flowers worked?”

  “You can say that, I guess.”

  I sit up, towering over her to block the sun from her eyes and pull my sunglasses up so she can see the significance of my words. For this, she needs to see the truth, needs to see the depth. I pull her glasses off and give her a second to adjust those gorgeous green eyes.

  I swallow hard through a tight throat. “I love you, Paige.”

  Her breath hitches and she blinks her wide eyes, but nothing is falling from those satin lips of hers. She’s speechless. My jaw ticks. She searches my eyes, glinting back and forth while her chin begins to tremble. I really hope this is a good sign. If not, I’m about to find out. I pull her onto my lap and feather a kiss across her lips.

  “I mean it, Paige. I do.”

  “I love you too,” she whispers.

  This time she doesn’t hesitate and captures my mouth. It’s heated with passion and fueled by emotions.

  “I love you too,” she whispers again against my lips.

  Let me tell you, I’ve heard moans from all different types of women in all different types of places—my mouth, my dick, my neck—you get the gist, but I have never felt the warmth you women talk about rushing your body until now. Until those very words were said to me. It’s an invigorating ignition. One that spreads intense heat awakening my every nerve, flooding my muscles with energy. I feel like I’ve been struck by lightning, the one billion volts squeezing my heart attempting to have it explode.