by Faiz Kermani
A taste that is simply divine
When I inhale that lovely perfume
I fall into a wonderful swoon
My mind pictures joyful scenes
As I drift to sleep with tea-filled dreams
Chapter 7
Tungtang stood behind the flowerpots watching yet another group of customers shout at Kamran and Lydia. The customers had moved onto the familiar, tiresome criticism about the table being dirty. What was that all about? There was nothing wrong with mud. Toads had lived in dirt for generations, and it had never done them any harm. Anyway, some humans picked their noses and flicked the disgusting bits that came out of them onto the floor when they thought no one was looking. But they did not fool Tungtang. Those types of customers were ones she needed to avoid. What if they accidentally directed some of that yucky stuff onto her – or worse still, into their tea? Tungtang felt ill thinking about it.
Tungtang decided to go back to the store room. The customers would carry on arguing for a while before they left. She would need time for the atmosphere in the tea room to calm down before returning.
To Tungtang’s delight, the crates on the shelves had been reorganised. That meant that fresh supplies of tea had arrived. She hovered around the labels trying to determine what was new. Her eyes fell upon a dark wooden crate with a shiny label on it.
“Royal Jubilee,” she croaked. That was an unfamiliar name. She read the description with growing interest and the words “sweet, smooth and refreshing” quickly convinced her that this was a tea she needed to try out.
Tungtang climbed onto the lid and moved across it looking for an entry point. From her many months of experience she knew that a corner was the best approach for this type of container. She hung over the edge and wedged in her feet. Using her tough toes, she slowly managed to widen the gap. Her nostrils caught the inviting scent of orange blossom, which made her drool. A few more seconds and she would be inside …
Kling klang kling klang kling klang!
The horrible high-pitched noise terrified Tungtang, and she fell off the crate.
Kling klang kling klang kling klang!
She was unable to grab hold of the shelf and dropped like a stone. Confused by the hideous noise which would not stop and obstructed by the layers of tea leaves stuck to her, she scuttled around aimlessly.
Whoosh!
Before she could do anything, a huge object came crashing down onto her.
“Got you!” cried out a triumphant voice.
Tungtang looked up and saw that she was trapped in a net. Above her hovered the puzzled faces of Lydia and Kamran.
“What is it?” asked Kamran in horror, as he switched off the electronic alarm on the crate.
“I’m not sure,” answered Lydia. “I can’t make out its shape, but it looks as if it has a lot of legs.”
“It’s covered in dirt. Let me get some water.”
Within minutes, Kamran had returned, and Tungtang was forced to endure an unwelcome shower.
“It’s a frog!” exclaimed Kamran.
Tungtang was frozen with terror and dared not correct him.
“I think it might be a toad. It looks a bit bigger and different to a frog,” said Lydia. “What should we do with it? We’re far from a river.”
“I know what I’d like to do with it,” scowled Kamran. “This horrible creature is responsible for all the problems we’ve been having.”
Tungtang trembled in fear. “Please don’t hurt me,” she croaked.
The humans jumped back in shock.
“You can speak?” asked Lydia.
“Yes,” replied Tungtang nervously. “My name’s Tungtang.”
Lydia and Kamran looked at each other in astonishment. It was a relief to know that their tea shop was not haunted, but a talking toad with a weird name did not make for a good explanation either.
“How did you learn to speak?” asked Lydia.
“By listening to you and your customers,” said Tungtang proudly.
“But why are you here?” asked Kamran carefully, feeling embarrassed to be talking to a toad.
“I wanted to travel and so I came to your town,” replied Tungtang. “Then I discovered your shop.”
“Which you then decided to try and destroy,” said Kamran bitterly.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean any harm,” croaked Tungtang desperately. “I couldn’t help myself. Your tea is so delicious that I didn’t want to leave.”
“You actually like tea?” exclaimed Lydia with surprise. “I mean, do you drink it?”
“Oh yes,” nodded Tungtang enthusiastically. “I adore the aroma and I love the taste. There’s no place I’d rather be than here. Please don’t throw me out. I don’t know what I’d do without tea.”
“This is crazy,” said Kamran. “Toads don’t drink tea.”
“Hang on a minute,” said Lydia, who then turned to Tungtang. “What is your favourite tea?”
Kamran looked at Lydia in horror. Had she gone mad? The quicker they dumped the ridiculous creature out in the road, the better.
“That’s very hard to answer,” replied Tungtang brightly. “Each tea has its unique features that make it special. For example, Earl Grey has that wonderful, invigorating fragrance that is perfect to wake up to in the morning. When it comes to afternoon tea, I always find that anything with Darjeeling goes well with cakes. Your more exotic and lesser-known teas are fantastic too. I quite enjoyed the gritty taste of the Sahara Sand blend you recently bought. More of your customers should try it.”
Lydia and Kamran looked at each other and suddenly leaped about in excitement. “Woo hoo!” they cried.
Humans were surprising creatures, thought Tungtang.
“Let me get the teas,” cried Kamran as he ran out of the room.
Lydia crouched next to Tungtang and released her from the net. “Look, Tungtang. We’re going to ask you to do a favour for us. We’d like you to drink some of our teas. Do you think you could do that?”
“Of course. I’d love to,” replied a very confused Tungtang. It was all very strange. Hadn’t they been angry with her a few minutes earlier for drinking their tea?
Chapter 8
Kamran closed the shop early and returned to the storage room wheeling a trolley. Tungtang noticed that rows of small cups were neatly positioned on it and that all were full of steaming hot tea.
“Now, Tungtang,” said Kamran. “What we would like you to do is try each of these cups and tell us what type of tea is in them.
He placed Tungtang next to the first cup. She took a moment to inhale the vapour before greedily slurping the contents. “Mmm… that is Masala Chai,” she belched. “It goes well with savoury snacks and gives you that lovely, warm sensation in your belly after you’ve drunk it.”
The second cup was a bit trickier, but after a brief pause, Tungtang felt quite certain with her answer. “This is Lady Grey. It has more zest than Earl Grey, but both are delicious – especially with Victoria sponge cake.”
Cup by cup, Tungtang made her way down the trolley, guessing each tea correctly and causing Kamran and Lydia to get increasingly excited in the process. After noisily draining the last cup and declaring it – due to its mild taste – to be a variety of Hojicha from Japan, Tungtang let out another large burp.
“Tungtang, we’d like to ask you something,” said Lydia, almost tripping over her words. “Would you like to live and work here?”
“Of course!” replied Tungtang without hesitation.
“We need a tea-taster,” explained Lydia. “And you’d be perfect. You would taste all the new teas that we buy and give advice to the customers about them.”
“I’d be delighted!” exclaimed an overjoyed Tungtang. It was like a dream come true. She would be surrounded by tea forever.
“I hope you don’t mind, but we
might need to make a few small changes to the way you drink tea though,” said Kamran. “For a start, you can’t belch like that in public.”
“And you’ll have to stay out of the tea crates,” added Lydia.
“Can I ask a question?” asked Tungtang, after she had signed her contract in the box marked ‘signature’ with a smudged, blue-black impression of her backside.
“Of course,” replied Lydia and Kamran simultaneously.
“I never got a chance to try out the Royal Jubilee blend you have on the shelf. Would you mind if I had a sip?”
“Come to think of it, I would like your opinion on that,” said Kamran, who reached for a ladder.
When the tea was ready, Tungtang eagerly sipped the cup, taking great care not to belch or make any rude noises.
“What do you think?” asked the couple.
“It’s got a lovely, flowery air to it, but it lacks a certain something,” replied Tungtang.
“Have you got any suggestions?” asked Lydia.
“I do,” mused Tungtang. The scent of the tea reminded her of a faraway land.
Kamran listened closely. He had taken a big risk in ordering the expensive tea from his supplier in London. Lydia had been less than pleased when she had found out the price.
“It needs some rose petals and lemongrass,” announced Tungtang.
“Are you sure?” asked a startled Kamran.
“Oh yes,” said Tungtang, nodding furiously.
“We can get our hands on those ingredients, can’t we?” said Lydia insistently.
“Yes, I suppose so,” muttered Kamran. He set off immediately on the strange errand to the Planet of the Potted Plants garden centre nearby before it closed for the day.
Under Tungtang’s watchful eye, the unusual ingredients were carefully mixed in with the tea leaves, and a new cup of tea was prepared.
Tungtang savoured the tantalising taste. A smile broke out across her face. “Try it,” she said, nudging the cup in Kamran’s direction with her back leg.
Very reluctantly, Kamran followed her instructions. He was amazed. “It’s incredible. It’s bursting with flavour!”
“It’s the combination of rose petals and lemongrass. They help bring out the sweetness that was locked deep inside the tea leaves,” explained Tungtang.
“Now that Tungtang has blended a new tea, I think she has the right to name it,” said Lydia.
“Agreed. What do you want to call it?” asked Kamran.
Tungtang paused for a minute. She thought about her friends on the riverbank. It seemed like such a long time since she had left them. She remembered the famous words of Dustysox the Great and she recalled the encouragement of beloved Grandpa Nutbelch. “I’m going to call it Muddy River, in honour of all toads everywhere,” she said proudly.
“Well – Muddy River it is then!” declared Kamran.
“I think this calls for a celebration,” laughed Lydia. “Let’s all celebrate with a fresh cup of Muddy River!”
Chapter 9
A few days later, a small but unusual notice appeared in all the local newspapers. It was accompanied by a photo of a smiling toad sitting next to a pot of tea. The townsfolk were astonished by the advertisement, and news of it spread like wildfire.
Toad tea-tasting at Queen Catherine’s Olde English
Tea Shoppe
We are delighted to announce that the enormously talented Tungtang the Toad has accepted the position of Official Tea-Taster here at Queen Catherine’s Olde English Tea Shoppe, effective immediately. Although relatively new to the world of fine tea, she has demonstrated a unique, magical toadish talent for tea-tasting that humans can only dream about.
Please do drop by to welcome Tungtang at her first official tea-tasting session this Monday afternoon at 3pm. Entry will be strictly limited to the first fifty customers.
The curious notice had the desired effect. That Monday afternoon, Queen Catherine’s Olde English Tea Shoppe was swamped by excited customers and journalists eager to see the unusual tea-taster in action. The opening had even attracted important members of society such as Lord and Lady Lobsterpants, who had elbowed their way past other people to the very front.
Sitting majestically on a little chair fashioned from a piece of whitened tree bark, Tungtang waved to the enthusiastic noisy crowd as they gathered outside the shopfront window to grab one of the precious tickets.
A few minutes later, Lydia rang the bell. The lucky fifty customers who had managed to get tickets surged into the shop to take their places. Taking care not to crumple her beautiful lavender robe, Tungtang daintily adjusted her golden tiara and curtsied in front of them.
The crowd gasped in admiration. “Such sophistication and refinement!” they whispered.
“For my first session, I shall be drinking a special blended tea called Muddy River. This is a blend that I recently invented with Kamran and Lydia. Please note that it is the first time that toads and humans have worked together to create a tea.”
What followed was the most remarkable display that anyone from the town had ever witnessed. The crowd clapped as Tungtang sipped the tea elegantly from a tiny porcelain cup. They sighed as she gently swirled the tea in her mouth. They applauded as she rolled her eyes, and they cheered as she rocked from side to side, trilling “Why, this is toad-ily tea-licious!”
By the time the tea-tasting session was over, Tungtang had become a celebrity. People flocked to the front of the shop to have photos taken with her, and they besieged Kamran and Lydia in order to buy tins of Muddy River and any other teas or gifts endorsed by Tungtang. The pair smiled, knowing that the future of Queen Catherine’s Olde English Tea Shoppe was secure.
The shop had sold out of stock by the end of the day, but the demand for tea did not stop there. Word spread fast. Soon, people from all around England and even other countries were paying a visit in the hope of seeing the famous, talented tea-tasting toad.
Chapter 10
Toad Triumphs in the World of Tea
Drinking tea has become fashionable again, thanks to an unlikely star – Tungtang the Toad. The hugely talented amphibian’s weekly tea-tasting sessions have become an enormous hit with people of all ages, drawing thousands of visitors per month from around the world to the small tea shop where she lives – Queen Catherine’s Olde English Tea Shoppe, located in the English town of Little Cobblestone.
Tungtang’s passion for tea is outlined in her book, A Toad’s Guide to Tea, which has become an international bestseller and has been praised for bringing a fresh approach to a beverage that is often taken for granted. It comes as little surprise to learn that Muddy River, the popular tea blend that she invented, was recently voted the nation’s favourite drink.
Despite her growing success, which has led to an invitation to join the World Tea Council, Tungtang remains a humble toad at heart. She prefers nothing better than greeting visitors to the tea shop and pottering about in her workshop, developing new blends.
“Tea means happiness,” she croaked. “The more blends I can create, the happier the world will be.”
Epilogue
Far away by a muddy riverbank, an old toad shuffled about among some newspapers that been dumped by human visitors. As he turned over one of the pages, he caught sight of a familiar face and immediately began to croak raucously. The other toads gathered round him to see what all the excitement was about.
“I knew Tungtang would do it!” cried Grandpa Nutbelch as he clambered onto a dirty stone and held aloft the torn page triumphantly. “Dustysox the Great’s prophecy has been fulfilled!”
That night, by the silvery light of the moon, the riverbank toads celebrated wildly as they joyfully recited Dustysox the Great’s famous words:
After me will come anoth
er toad
One who will set out on a distant road
The toad will look forward but never back
For the journey from Muddy River will be a one way track
The humans will hold the toad in great esteem
For unlocking the secret of leaves and steam
In the future, all will honour the name
Of the toad who achieved human glory and fame
About the Author…
Faiz Kermani is an award-winning British author who lives with his family in France. For more information on his books, please visit www.faizkermani.com
By the same author
It’s not always easy being different, as Biriwita the blue frog is only too aware. He longs to be accepted at Croak College, the most famous school for frogs in Malawi, but the other students all turn their backs on him. He is just too different!
“What’s wrong with you?
Why are you blue?
You’re the strangest frog we’ve seen
Normal frogs are green!”
The Frog Who Was Blue was published to support the World Medical Fund (WMF), a children’s medical charity. WMF’s practical and cost-effective programmes treat over 25,000 children every year in rural Malawi. This life-saving work relies entirely on donations. More information about WMF can be found at www.worldmedicalfund.org
