Conklin's Blueprints

by Brooke Page

  I thought for a moment, “Not really. I mean, my ex-boyfriend only did it a few times, and I was never comfortable with it. He was very ho hum about it. He told me it tasted funny once.”

  Tyler wrinkled his nose, “Are you sure he isn’t gay?”

  I laughed out loud. Connor telling Ashlynn he was gay would be the highlight of the century.

  My laughter was cut off by Tyler’s phone ringing again. He pulled it from his pocket and sighed again.

  “Why don’t you just answer your phone and talk to her? Maybe it’s important?” I said apathetically. He kept his eyes on his phone, then just when I thought the ringing was going to stop he brushed the screen with his thumb and said hello.

  I couldn’t hide the smile that crept across my face. I grabbed my phone from the bed where Tyler threw it and went into the other room to call my mom.

  “Becca! It’s so nice to hear from you dear!” my mother said answering the phone on the first ring. “I haven’t heard from you in a while, are you planning on coming over tomorrow? Heather and Michael will be here. I would love to have you all home.” Her voice was heartwarming. As crazy as she was, she loved having us all together.

  “Yes, I am planning on coming. Do you, um… mind if I bring someone with me?” I asked, trying to sound indifferent.

  “Well of course you can bring Jamie dear. You know she is always welcome.” She sounded as if I was the crazy one now.

  I stared at the ceiling. I might be in over my head with this. “No, not Jamie. I’m not sure what she is doing tomorrow. I will let you know if she can come when I get a hold of her.”

  “Oh?” My mother’s curiosity was piqued. “Are you bringing a boy?” she questioned, trying not to sound excited. I rolled my eyes.

  I leaned over the kitchen island. “Please don’t look too much into it. We are friends… and I think a semi-normal family dinner would be good for him.”

  “Semi-normal?” Her voice sounded offended.

  “Yes, our family is on the verge of insanity. Just please, don’t make a big deal of it?” I pressed.

  “Since when do I make a big deal of things?”

  “Since always. I will see you tomorrow, okay?”

  “Alright sweetheart, see you tomorrow.”

  “Bye.”

  I hung up the phone and started to send Jamie a text asking if she would be joining us tomorrow at my parent’s house. As I hit send, Tyler came up behind me and put his hands on my hips, pulling me into him. I smirked as I set my phone down on the counter then spun around to face him.

  “How was your mom?” I said crossing my arms.

  His composure was casual. “Fine. She wanted to see me tomorrow. I told her I had plans.”

  “See, it wasn’t that bad to talk to her now was it?”

  He put his hands on my hips and lifted me on the counter. Cozying himself in between my legs.

  “Yes, it was,” he scowled. “Did you tell your mom you were going to bring me with you tomorrow?” I nodded my head and pulled his face to mine so I could kiss him to try and rid him from his pout. After I kissed his lips it was still sort of there, so I kissed his nose, and it was half way gone. I gave him another kiss and a smile started to play on his lips. I ran my hands through his hair. The gel from this morning was gone, and his hair was still messy, some of it flopped on his forehead. It was simply adorable. I was a little disappointed he had put on a T-shirt.

  “Did you tell your mom you were bringing your boyfriend to dinner?” he asked.

  My smile faded as I bit my lip. Was that what he was? My boyfriend? The thought made my heart pound.

  “Is that what you wanted me to say?” I asked while searching his eyes.

  He brushed my bangs farther to the side so it was away from my eye. “Isn’t that what I am?”

  I couldn’t read what he wanted me to say. Maybe he was feeling the same way, afraid to say the wrong thing. But he was the one who wanted to be secretive and was worried about his dad finding out and my dad saying something.

  “I thought you were worried about my dad, so I told her I was bringing a friend and to not read into it.” For a slight second there was hurt in his eyes, but he tried to hide it with a grin. “Hey,” I said, taking his face in my hands again. “I care about you… a lot. I just… I don’t want to cross a line and have you freak out and not talk to me again.”

  His eyes hardened as he held my wrists, still keeping my hands on his face. “I don’t have any lines. I told you, I just don’t want my dad to find out. Insinuating I don’t want him to find out would mean we are together.”

  Well how was I supposed to know that? “You haven’t asked me to be your girlfriend or anything,” I teased, trying to lighten his mood again.

  It worked. A sexy smile spread across his face. “So I am getting all of this for free?” I huffed and smacked his chest. I would have been offended if he hadn’t have said it so playfully.

  “I’m kidding!” He wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me as close to him as he could. Looking me in the eyes with the same playfulness he asked, “Becca, will you be my girlfriend?”

  A part of me wanted to play with him, but the words came off my lips before I could think, “Yes.” I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him. His hands started to run up the back of my T-shirt as he hummed into my mouth. Just as his hands were about to wander to my front, a chime went through the house. Tyler pulled away and took me off of the counter. “I ordered some dessert from the restaurant downstairs. I think you will be pleased to see what I got.” His eyes were glittering with excitement as he walked through the dining room to the front door. I crossed my arms. Great. Just what I needed.

  I heard muffling as he talked to the delivery man then the closing of the door. He walked into the kitchen carrying a silver platter. He set the platter down on the island. I was standing on the opposite side of the island, studying the covered platter. He searched through the drawers and pulled out two forks then came back. As he pulled the top off his eyes were on me.

  Shit. It was a massive piece of tiramisu. It looked amazing. I gulped as I stared at it, biting my lip. Why did he get this? I couldn’t tempt myself with it. I wouldn’t be able to stop, then I would find myself reaching for a snickers bar at the airport, and before I knew it I would be eating a package of Oreo’s every night.

  Tyler watched me as I examined the dessert. He pushed one of the forks across the counter over to me. I kept an arm around my waist as I bit my nail nervously.

  Tyler kept watching me. I closed my eyes and shook my head. “I’m not hungry.”

  “You just undressed that with your eyes,” Tyler said pointing his fork at the layers of chocolate.

  I closed my eyes for a long second biting my lip.

  Tyler set his fork down and walked over to me. “I’ve picked up that you have issues with food, and I get it. I won’t be a nagging boyfriend about what you eat.” He pulled my chin up so I would look at him. My eyes were starting to glaze over. I didn’t want him to know about my struggle with food. I never binged and purged, and I never didn’t eat. I just had trouble with what to eat and when. “But if you stop eating altogether, then I will get on your case about it.”

  I pulled my face from his grasp and wiped my eyes. No one had ever said anything like that to me. My mom was constantly watching what I put in my mouth, analyzing every calorie, gmo, and fat content. Ashlynn would insinuate I needed to watch what I ate, but constantly threw junk in my face, while Jamie helped me to gain control of when to eat what and tried to give me balance. No one ever said they understood why I was the way I was.

  “Becca…”

  “Don’t,” I whispered, trying to fight back tears. I had the urge to put on a parka. My thighs suddenly felt huge, and I wanted more than anything to put on more items of clothing. I started to back up into the living room, wanting to hide in the couch.

  Tyler grabbed my hand and pulled me back to him so I was flush with his chest and held me
. Having his arms wrap around me tightly and his head buried in my hair made it hard for me to not want to cry into his chest. He nuzzled my neck and his scruff tickled me. I wiggled in his arms. Once he realized it tickled, he did it again but more forcefully. I let out a giggle, and I could feel his smile on my neck as he kept nuzzling me.

  He pulled back and looked into my eyes. “There is the smile I love. I wish it would touch those beautiful light blue eyes you have.”

  My lips quirked up a fraction. He said he loved my smile and that I had beautiful eyes. I touched his face with warmth and gratitude. For the first time in my life I believed someone when they gave me a compliment.

  “Do you care if I eat this?” he said, holding my hand against his face and nodding at the delectable dessert.

  “Please do.” As far as I was concerned that tiramisu needed to be either in the garbage or thrown out the window before my self-restraint collapsed.

  His Conklin grin spread across his face. “Can I eat it off you?”

  I threw my head back and laughed whole heartedly.

  “What?” Although his eyes were playful his words were wounded.

  “That sounds like a sticky mess. I wouldn’t want to ruin your high thread count sheets,” I said turning to go sit on the couch. He stopped me and pulled me back to him, my back to his front as he stretched one arm around my shoulders holding me close.

  I felt his lips brush against my ear. “That’s what showers and dry cleaning are for,” he whispered, then picked up the fork to take a bite of the dessert.

  I leaned my head back on his shoulder. “Showers? I’m beginning to think you are obsessed with trying to get me naked.”

  He moved his hand across my collarbone and whispered in my ear again. “Can you blame me? I’m sick of imagining. I want to see the real thing.” He took another bite of the dessert.

  A frown spread across my lips. Too bad his imagination was probably way better than the real thing.

  After he swallowed his lips were on my neck. “Can we try and watch the Batman movie again?”

  I let a soft breath escape my smile as I put both my hands on his forearm that was spread across my collarbone. “If you would hurry up and eat that we could,” I said, nodding my head towards the plate.

  He laughed again and let go of me to focus on the sinful dessert. We both sat down at the bar so he could finish the layers of chocolate. Watching him eat it was a turn on, not because of the food, but how he swallowed and moved his lips. I started to fantasize and picture his lips moving the same way on me. A blush came across my face. Fortunately he didn’t catch my stare.

  “Uh, that was so good… I can’t finish it.” He groaned, leaning back on the stool and stretching his arms above his head. He had left maybe two bites. I was impressed, it was a huge piece.

  He set his arm along the back of my barstool and gazed at me. “I will take my shirt off for the movie, if you lick this off me,” he coaxed.

  I tried to hide my amusement. Like he wasn’t going to get naked anyway.

  “I think I will take my chances,” I teased.

  “What? You think I’m going to do it anyway?” He was attempting to sound offended, but he couldn’t stop himself from smiling.

  I filled my eyes with seduction and stood up, swiveling his stool so I was standing in between his legs. His head whipped back in apprehension. I took the hem of his shirt in my fingers and slowly moved it up his chest. He quickly helped me to take it off of him. I examined his bare chest with my eyes and hands then leaned down to just above his navel and made a trail with my tongue up his chest, along his collar, and all the way up to his ear. His chest rose along with my tongue, and he took a sharp breath in when my breath was in his ear.

  “I don’t need to have chocolate to lick you,” I whispered. He sucked in air and before I knew it I was off the ground, being carried back to his bedroom.

  Chapter 16

  I fluttered my eyes open, being greeted with an early sunrise upon the large city. The sky was lovely shades of pinks and purples, and I was glad we didn’t close the curtain. Fingertips brushed my lower back up my spine then pulled my loose locks of hair to the side. Warm lips grazed my shoulder where my hair had been pulled away. I rolled so I was able to face the owner of the warm lips and fingertips that ever so gently stirred me awake. My body was sore in all the right places as I rotated so I could snuggle up against Tyler.

  I nuzzled his firm chest and intertwined my legs with his. I put my hand on his muscular lower back as he entrapped me in his arms. He continued his gentle kisses on my temple and cheeks, rubbing his nose along mine.

  “Good morning,” he whispered, moving his lips to kiss my eye lashes. I murmured good morning back, burying my head in his chest. His body was warm and inviting, and I had no intentions of leaving his bed any time soon.

  “Did you sleep okay?” His voice was soft.

  “Yes, I think you put me in a coma,” I teased, tilting my head to kiss his neck. I could hear his grin as he tipped his head to the side, allowing me to give his neck more kisses.

  “Sorry, I can’t help getting frisky when I re situate in bed and my hand lands on your skin.”

  “I am beginning to think you are always frisky,” I giggled, running my hand up his spine to his defined shoulder blades.

  “Only when I am around you or when I am thinking of you. You know I only have eyes for you, right? I mean I would never touch anyone else the way I touch you,” he said, leaning up on his elbow and putting his hand on my cheek.

  “I know. I trust you,” I said, leaning up to kiss the corner of his mouth. I laid my head back down on the pillow. He looked like he was in deep thought.

  “You are the only woman I have ever really been able to touch.” His words were laced with a hint of pain. He was thinking about his past relationship. I ached to know more, but I was terrified once he told me about it, he would want to know more about who I had been with, and I wasn’t ready to share.

  “I love when you touch me, and I love that I can touch you, too,” I said giving him a heartfelt smile.

  He clenched his eyes shut, “You have no idea how much your touch means to me.”

  I gulped, afraid to ask the question it felt like he was begging me to ask.

  “What happened with your past relationship?” I bravely said, hoping it wasn’t going to open up the can of worms I had been avoiding, and would avoid the rest of my life.

  His eyes stayed closed as he laid flat on his back. “Let’s just say it was forbidden, but I couldn’t stay away from the temptation.”

  “Why? Your parents wouldn’t approve?”

  He opened an eye and had a trace of humor in it. “They didn’t know about it.”

  “Did her parents not approve?”

  His lips quirked up, “I’m sure they wouldn’t have,” he said.

  I pulled up on my elbow so I could get a better look at his expression, hoping it would help me to understand.

  “She was kind of our… nanny,” he said, biting his lip while sitting up against the headboard.

  My eyes widened. “How old was she? How old were you?” I tried to hide the anger in my voice. If she was his nanny, then he couldn’t have been very old, and she had to have been old enough to know better.

  “I was 16.”

  Oh, so he wasn’t as young as I thought he might have been.

  “Why did you still have a nanny when you were 16?”

  He shrugged his shoulders. “She more did our laundry, cleaned, kept us in line. I told you my mother was more interested in her social groups. Besides, Mitch was four years younger than I was. He still needed more attention at the time.”

  “Which she was obviously giving to you instead,” I snorted.

  He laughed at my expression. “Maybe so, but it didn’t feel that way.”

  I sat up next to him, holding a pillow to my chest. His gaze was intense, waiting for my next question.

  “How long did it go on?”
/>   “Ten years,” he said quietly. My mouth dried up. Tyler fidgeted and ran his hands through his hair. “It wasn’t a relationship though. We just fucked, quickly, and with our clothes on. Like I said before, I was only allowed to touch her in certain areas, and she only touched me in certain areas. It was always spontaneous and on her terms.” His words were flustered and agitated.

  Hearing him talk about having sex with someone else was unsettling. The fact that he sounded angry about it was worse. Did he love her? Was he still in love with her?

  “Do you still see her?” I croaked. I didn’t want to look at him.

  “No.” His voice was chilling. “I haven’t seen her since my grandfather’s funeral just over a year ago.” He almost sounded bitter.

  Tyler sighed and pulled me so I was on his lap. “I don’t want to talk about this anymore.”

  “Did you love her?” I whispered.

  He didn’t say anything.

  There’s your answer.

  I sighed and pulled away from him, climbing off the bed with the pillow. I held it over my front and walked backwards to the bathroom. “I’m going to hop in the shower,” I mumbled, my eyes not leaving the floor. I closed the bathroom door behind me and turned on the hot water before he could say anything.

  I basked in the hot water, trying to wrap my head around all that I just heard. How did he have such a messed up relationship for so long? She clearly controlled him, it was written all over his face as he talked about her. What if she showed up on his doorstep again? Would he do the same as he did to me earlier, be attracted and ram her against the nearest wall? I shook my head. I was being stupid. How could I be mad about this? I couldn’t be one to talk. I had slept with dozens of random men in a very short period of time, and I loved someone in the past too, so much that I wanted to marry him. If he could handle that, I could surely handle his extremely odd affair. But I wouldn’t be able to handle him not talking to me. I learned that not communicating was how to end a relationship, and I really, really liked Tyler.