Rock Chick Renegade

by Ashley, Kristen

  I had to hold on to the bed platform not because of a bel y flutter but because my knees went weak. There were al sorts of reasons for this, none of which I had the time or inclination to explore at that moment.

  I pul ed myself together and walked outside.

  Nick was standing in the yard staring at Vance’s Harley which was parked close to the backdoor.

  Nick’s eyes swung to me but he didn’t say a word.

  “Um… seems Vance and I are back together,” I informed Nick, explaining the bike.

  Nick watched me a beat then dropped his head, stared at his shoes and muttered something under his breath I didn’t catch.

  I walked closer to him. “Sorry?” I asked. “I didn’t hear that.”

  He looked at me. “These are the times I hate,” he said louder.

  I just stared at him.

  Then I asked, “What times?”

  “The times when I don’t know what Reba explained to you and what she didn’t.”

  Oh crap.

  Not one of those times. Those times were always embarrassing for both of us. Always.

  “Nick –” I started but Nick interrupted me and I could tel it was in an effort to get what he had to say over with and quick.

  “Don’t fuck with this guy, Jules. This is not the type of guy you fuck with. I figure he’s got a lot of patience and to be honest, no offense sweetheart, he’s gonna need it with you.

  But don’t use up his patience. Does that make sense?” I was stil caught at Nick dropping the f-bomb. Nick didn’t tend to use the f-word very often.

  Nick took my silence as confusion, came closer to me and explained, “What I’m sayin’ is, don’t jack him around.”

  “Nick!”

  “I’m just sayin’.”

  “I’m not jacking Vance around!” Okay, maybe I was, but I didn’t realize it at the time. “I’m just…” I went on, “working through some issues.”

  “Wel , don’t tease him while you’re doin’ it, that’s al I’m sayin’.”

  “Tease him?” I whispered.

  Oh my God.

  Was I teasing Vance? Was I teasing Luke? Was I teasing both Vance and Luke?

  Oh… my… God.

  How did I go from virgin to slut to tease in a week?

  “Do you think I’m teasing him?” I breathed, beginning to freak out.

  “Uh…” Nick mumbled, watching me freak out and then lifted a hand to scratch the back of his head, “maybe you should talk to one of the girls at the bookstore about it.”

  “I think I’l do that,” I agreed quietly and I was damned certain I would. If there was ever a time for a girlfriend, this was the time.

  Nick came forward and kissed my cheek then he was gone.

  I got into Hazel and freaked out.

  Then I thought of Vance sleeping in my bed and I freaked out more (but in a good way).

  Then I felt something funny, sweet and wet, nudging around in my memory filing cabinets. I looked through my chain link fence and saw a cute, fawn-colored pug puppy with a black face pushing his nose through the fence and giving me sloppy, puppy kisses.

  I looked through the fence.

  My Rottie was nowhere to be seen.

  I wondered if I’d miss him.

  Chapter Twenty

  Yoko Ono

  I sat in the parking lot at King’s and pul ed out my cel phone, scrol ed down to Luke’s number, took a deep breath and hit the green button.

  “Yeah?” he answered after the first ring.

  “Hey, it’s Jules.”

  “I know who it is and I know why you’re cal in’. I’m lookin’

  at the monitors and I see Vance’s Harley sittin’ outside your house.”

  Whoops.

  “Um, seems there was a misunderstanding,” I told him.

  “Bet there was, especial y with him doin’ surveil ance room last night.”

  “He kinda saw us,” I explained unnecessarily.

  “I know where the cameras are positioned, babe. He more than kinda saw us.”

  He’d said “cameras”, plural. It was a big room but stil .

  I decided it was best not to think about it. “He wasn’t happy,” I went on.

  Silence but I heard a door close.

  “Seems that we weren’t broken up after al ,” I went on,

  “he was just giving me space.”

  More silence for a beat then quietly, “I hope that’s it. I find out he threw away his nice shiny toy then got pissed when he saw someone else playin’ with it, I’m the one who’s not gonna be happy.”

  Um.

  Yikes.

  “I’m not sure I like being described as a toy,” I said, feeling the head crackin’ vibe coming over me.

  “I’m not the one treatin’ you like a toy,” Luke shot back.

  I decided this wasn’t going very wel . “There are things you don’t understand.”

  “Right.”

  Time to play peacemaker. “Luke, seriously, I don’t want to be Yoko Ono.”

  “Come again?”

  “I don’t want to be the one who breaks up the band.” More silence then, “Babe.”

  I felt relief sweep through me. His “babe” was amused.

  He understood.

  Then he continued talking. “Mace heard how you took down Warren and his girls and saw you floor Jermaine. He and I agree you’re ready to be ful -time in the field. No more training. It’s showtime. You’re ride-along with me tonight.” He wasn’t asking. I didn’t know how Vance would feel about this but I hoped I could talk him into it because I real y, really wanted to do ride-along.

  “What time?” I asked.

  “Pick you up at nine.”

  “Gotcha.”

  “Out.”

  He disconnected.

  * * * * *

  I had a morning from hel , phone ringing off the hook, kids al over me wanting dirt on my now famous takedown of the furry pimp and his whores, word as usual travel ing fast, the two skanks obviously had been talking; appointments stacked up, I didn’t have a chance to breathe. May had been busy in the kitchen and I didn’t have the opportunity to corner her to ask her opinion about Nick’s

  “teasing and jacking Vance around” concerns.

  I escaped at lunch, doing a run at Chipotle for Andy and me. I stormed through the doors at King’s carrying a bag ful of two fat, foil-wrapped burritos.

  “Hey Sugar!” Daisy cal ed.

  My head swung toward the couches and I saw Daisy sitting with Clarice. They both were wearing identical, fluffy, ice-blue, angora, v-neck sweaters, black (Clarice) and white (Daisy) cleavage bursting forth in abundance.

  “Please tel me you paid for those,” I said, walking up to Daisy and Clarice.

  “I quit shop-liftin’ when I was thirteen. It lost its al ure after a three month stint in juvie. Gettin’ Clarice here to turn over a new leaf. That right Clarice?” Daisy turned to Clarice.

  “Unh-hunh,” Clarice answered.

  I wondered about Daisy’s ability to be a mentor to a sixteen year old runaway. I didn’t know that much about Daisy but with what I did know, I decided she’d probably be a kickass mentor.

  I looked at Daisy. “I need a powwow,” I told her.

  Daisy and Clarice stared at me.

  “What kind of powwow?” Daisy asked.

  “Apparently Vance and I aren’t broken up. There was a misunderstanding. He was giving me space. He’s sleeping at my house right now.”

  Daisy’s eyes got huge. Then they got bright. Then she jumped up from the couch and grabbed onto my forearms with both of her hands and jumped up and down, her enormous head of teased-out platinum blonde hair bouncing with every jump (I didn’t look at her cleavage and luckily she didn’t either or there might have been blackened eyes).

  “Yee-ha!” she screamed.

  I didn’t jump with her as I was a head crackin’ mamma jamma and as such didn’t jump around like a girlie-freak.

  Daisy d
idn’t seem to mind.

  Stil , I couldn’t help but smile.

  “This is so great,” she shouted then let me go and turned to Clarice. “Isn’t this great?”

  “Fuck yeah,” Clarice said, smiling broadly at me. Al the kids knew Vance and I were together and also likely knew Vance and I’d split up. Sniff had been in the building.

  Vance and I’d split up. Sniff had been in the building.

  “Don’t say fuck,” I said to Clarice and turned to Daisy. “I need a powwow. Can you get the girls together after work?”

  “What’s the subject?”

  I kept my eyes trained on Daisy not wanting Clarice in on the Is Jules A Slut or A Tease? If So, Discuss, Powwow.

  “Long story. I’l explain at the powwow. Tel me where, I’l tel May.”

  “You betcha, Sugar,” Daisy said and pul ed out her cel phone and started stabbing at the buttons with her long, lethal y-pointed fingernail.

  Okay, one down, one to go.

  I gave Andy his burrito and took mine into the empty yel ow room with my cel . I sat down at the table and peeled back the paper and foil on my burrito. Then I scrol ed down to Vance’s number and hit the green button.

  It rang five times (I counted) then he answered, “Yeah?”

  “Hey, it’s Jules.”

  He was quiet for a second then he said softly, sounding like it was through a smile, “You know, Princess, I have your number programmed in my phone.”

  This made me freak out but again in a good way.

  “It’s rude just to launch in and talk,” I told him, not letting on to my good freak out. “You should always identify yourself.”

  “I’l keep that in mind.”

  “Did I wake you?” I asked this even though he sounded awake and alert. Then again he always sounded awake and alert.

  “You caught me in the shower.”

  Oh my God.

  Major Good Freak Out.

  I cleared visions of Vance naked in my shower out of my mind. I was so good at doing this I completely blanked my mind and forgot why I was cal ing.

  “Jules?”

  “Um… yeah.”

  Pull yourself together, Jules.

  “I’m meeting the girls after work,” I told him.

  “When are you gonna be done? I’l make dinner.” This was too much. I could barely process Vance sleeping in my bed and he’d done it before. I’d even slept in his bed. The shower, dinner, I couldn’t hack it.

  “Jules?”

  “What?”

  “Are we done talkin’?”

  “No.”

  “Then maybe you should talk.”

  God, I was such an idiot.

  “You cook?” I asked.

  “No,” Vance answered.

  I blinked at my burrito. “Didn’t you just say you were making dinner?”

  “There’s a tray of what looks like incinerated brownies on your stove. I’m guessin’ we’d do better to take our chances with me.”

  He was probably right. Stil , it was slightly embarrassing.

  I made a mental note to throw out the brownie tray. “Nick normal y cooks. Maybe we should bum a meal off him.”

  “I like Nick, Princess, but I been away for three days, you just let your guard down and told me you’re off with the girls for part of the night. That’s about al I’m wil in’ to share.” Uh-oh.

  “Um…”

  “That doesn’t sound like a good ‘um’.”

  Throughout our conversation he’d sounded mel ow, relaxed, in a good mood, amused. Now, he did not.

  “I kinda promised to go ride-along with Luke tonight.” Silence.

  “Vance?”

  “How ‘kinda’?”

  “Kind of, definitely, kinda.”

  The phone came away from his mouth but I stil heard him swear. Then his voice was back in my ear. “I thought we agreed you’d cal him.”

  “We did.”

  “You need to cal him.”

  “I did.”

  Silence for a beat then, “Did you actual y speak to him?”

  “Yes.”

  “So tel me how did your tel in’ him to back off translate into a ride-along?”

  Yes, I was right. Vance had definitely lost his mel ow, relaxed, amused, good mood.

  “He understands about Yoko Ono,” I explained, “it’l be al right.”

  More silence then, “Maybe you should explain to me More silence then, “Maybe you should explain to me about Yoko Ono.”

  The words were a suggestion, the way he said them was not.

  “Do you know who Yoko Ono is?”

  He didn’t answer.

  I figured everyone knew who Yoko Ono was so I just forged ahead. “Wel , see, The Beatles had this thing, no women in the –”

  “I know about The Beatles,” Vance cut in.

  “You do?”

  “Yeah.”

  “You like them? Their music, that is.”

  I asked because I was curious. Everything with Vance had been so intense, it felt like it had been years and it’d only been a week. I had a lot to learn and I figured no better time than the present.

  And anyway, I loved The Beatles. If he didn’t like them that would suck. If he was in the house what would I do when I was in a Sgt. Pepper’s mood?

  “For Christ’s sake, Jules, get to the point.” Yikes.

  Maybe now was not the time for a “getting-to-know-you” conversation.

  “Wel , if you know about The Beatles and Yoko Ono then you get it.”

  “No.”

  “I don’t want to be the woman who breaks up the band.” Again silence.

  “Luke gets it. I think he’l be cool,” I went on.

  “Luke gets it. I think he’l be cool,” I went on.

  He stil didn’t speak.

  “I real y want to do a ride-along. I think I could learn a lot.” More silence.

  “Vance, you have to trust me,” I said quietly.

  A beat more of silence then I heard a sigh. “Come back for dinner. When you’re done with Luke, I’l be at the cabin.” For a second I didn’t breathe. Then my mind shouted, Yay!

  He trusted me.

  And I was getting a ride-along. And I was getting to go back to the cabin.

  “You have to leave the door open,” I told him.

  “I always leave the door open. Do you know how to get there?”

  Hel yes, I’d memorized it even though I thought we were breaking up.

  I wasn’t going to tel him that.

  “Maybe you should write out directions.”

  * * * * *

  The Powwow was at Fortnum’s at five thirty. I got there late and the crowd had already assembled. It included May, Daisy, Roxie, Jet, Indy, Al y, Tod, Stevie and for some bizarre reason Tex. Tod and Stevie I could understand. Tex seemed like curry powder sprinkled on an ice cream sundae.

  Whatever.

  I sat down while everyone watched me al of them grinning but no one saying a word.

  “It seems there was a misunderstanding,” I started.

  Lots of nods.

  “I thought we were breaking up. Vance thought we were making up. Then he decided to give me some space because things were too intense.”

  More nods, grins turning into smiles.

  “Seems you don’t have sex four times while breaking up and saying good-bye,” I went on.

  Mouths dropped open except Daisy who emitted a tinkly bel laugh.

  “Vance tel s me that’s more of a making-up kind of thing to do,” I informed them.

  Everyone looked at each other and I thought I heard Al y give a snort of amusement.

  “This morning, my Rottweiler took a hike,” I went on.

  The smiles disappeared and faces turned confused.

  I took in a deep breath and told them about my emotional Rottweiler and his disappearance and even told them about my cute, new, cuddly, squirmy pug puppy.

  The smiles came back.

  “Last night, I mad
e out with Luke,” I continued.

  The smiles vanished again.

  “And, kind of, the night before.”

  Eyes bugged out.

  “Holy crap,” Indy final y spoke.

  “What’s he like?” Roxie asked.

  I just looked at her. She took one look at my face which obviously said a thousand (good) words and when her hand went up to her throat it was shaking.

  I carried on. “Vance wired my house, put cameras in to keep an eye on me and protect me. He was working the surveil ance room last night. He saw the whole thing.”

  “Jesus, sweet Lord in heaven,” May whispered.

  “I’d just taken down a furry pimp, some guy who skipped bond and two of his girls, taser and hand-to-hand. Luke and Ike didn’t need to lift a finger. After it was over, I was kind of… jazzed and I’m guessing so was Luke,” I explained,

  “and anyway, I thought Vance and I were over.” More nods.

  “The time before, wel … it just happened. Stil , I thought Vance and I were over or no way.”

  “I hear you, sister,” Al y said.

  “Luke wouldn’t move in if he thought you were Vance’s woman,” Roxie threw in. “He doesn’t do that.”

  “How do you know?” Tod asked.

  “He told me,” Roxie answered.

  “That seems an odd thing to share,” Jet entered the discussion, “especial y for Luke.”

  “It’s a long story,” Roxie said.

  Everyone stared at her. With everyone’s gaze on her, she told us about how Luke told her he was interested if it didn’t work out with Hank and something about “Denver men being men”.

  When she was done, everyone kept staring at her.

  “That Luke sure gets around,” Stevie muttered.

  “Boy needs to find his own woman,” May declared.

  “You got that right, sister,” Jet said.

  “Mm,” Al y murmured, her eyes had gone glazed.

  “People, fuckin’ focus. I’m thinkin’ The Law ain’t here to talk girlie bul shit. What’s this about a furry pimp?” Tex barked.

  “That’s over. Ike took him in. It took like thirty seconds for me to drop al three of them,” I said.

  “Righteous,” Al y remarked.

  “So what d’you need from us?” Tex asked. “Need a partner when you go out? Want to double up on maneuvers; you get seen harassin’ one dealer while someone else douses another’s car with vegetable oil? Get them al freaked out that The Law can be two places at once? That kind of thing?”