Unspoken Endings

by Gabbie S. Duran

  Unspoken Endings

  Copyright © 2014 by Gabbie S. Duran

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, brands, media, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of various products referenced in this work of fiction, which have been used without permission. The publication/use of these trademarks is not authorized, associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owners.

  All rights reserved. Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of the above copyright owner of this book.

  Cover art by ©Sarah Hansen at Okay Creations

  http://www.okaycreations.com/

  Editing done by Edee M. Fallon, Mad Sparks Editing

  https://www.facebook.com/MadSparkEditing

  Proofreaders: Missy Stegman and Janett Gomez

  Formatting by Champagne Formats

  ISBN-10: 0990471373

  ISBN-13: 978-0-9904713-7-0

  Author links:

  Author page: http://gabbiesduran.com/

  Facebook: www.facebook.com/authorgabbiesduran

  Twitter: @gabbiesduran

  Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/7093957.Gabbie_S_Duran

  Find other titles by Gabbie S. Duran on Amazon.

  Dedication

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chapter Nineteen

  Chapter Twenty

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  Chapter Thirty

  Chapter Thirty-One

  Epilogue

  Broken Temptation

  Acknowledgements

  About the Author

  To my mother, Rosa. I love you.

  I CAN’T BREATHE. He’s literally stealing the breath from me as his fingers tighten around my throat, his body pinning me down. His hand squeezes harder. My heart accelerates to a dangerous level, feeling as if it will burst from my chest, but I refuse to give up. I can’t. It would mean he wins. With all the strength I have left, I keep trying to push his body off. My hands claw at his face and somehow I manage to gouge his eyes with my fingernails. With a wail, he rises off my body and loosens his grip around my neck.

  With all my might, I swing my arm up and my fist makes contact with his face; it shocks him momentarily, allowing me to push him off enough to wiggle my way from under him. I’m still breathless, barely able to move, but my only thought is escape.

  “Get back here, you bitch!” he shouts as he grabs onto my ankle, my body pulled to a stop. Turning around, I kick him with my other foot and manage to break free once more.

  I don’t have the strength yet to stand up, but I manage to frantically crawl from his grasp to keep him from pulling me down again. My fear and determination is what keeps me moving. Sucking in a deep breath of air, I force myself up to my feet and start to run.

  I’m running for my life at this point. My feet are moving on instinct, doing what they know best as they attempt to put distance between us. I can hear him chasing me; his panting breathes mere steps behind me, but I keep running, never looking back.

  “You think you can get away from me, Abigail?”

  His words fuel my fear, causing my legs to pump harder and my body to move faster, the air swooshing by me, the world passing in a blur. I know he’s no longer behind me, but I can still hear his panicked shouts.

  “You belong to me! I’ll find you and you’ll regret ever leaving me!”

  I rapidly sit up, escaping the nightmare of Bill. My lungs are gasping for air while my eyes adjust to the darkness of the room. My body is damp with sweat, while my chest still heavily rises and falls to catch up with my rapidly beating heart. Tears are threatening to break free as I sit wondering why I suddenly had the dream. The tears are still rising, but I refuse to cry because I know I’m stronger than my weakness. But, I cannot deny the fear still lingering in my blood. Even in my dreams, I can’t escape him, and I hate it.

  Sleep eludes me at this point, forcing me to hug my knees while I push the still lingering fear away. Instead, I keep asking myself: Have I made the right decision by coming here? A question I’ve been asking myself since the moment I stepped onto the plane and left Matt behind. With him, I always feel safe. Rarely fearing Bill would risk approaching me after that first time, but now I’m an open target.

  With time, I come to the same conclusion as before. If I ever plan to find myself, I have to follow my own dreams. I refuse to let the fear of failing, or being held captive in a controlling relationship, stop me from finding myself. I am Abigail Adams, and although I didn’t know who I was six month ago, I know who I am now… I am a fighter, and I will reach that finish line, one way or another.

  IT’S ONLY BEEN a couple of days since I’d left Portland, but New York is a wakeup call I didn’t expect. The moment I stepped onto the plane and left the only past I’d known behind, was the moment I realized how much I’d grown to depend on Matt for stability. He’d been the one I’d gone running to in the beginning. He helped me discover love for the first time all over again. He was the rock I knew I would always be able to depend on.

  The loneliness immediately began the moment after I checked into what would be my new home for the next couple of weeks. It was technically still a hotel, but you can equally compare it to a small apartment with all its equivalent similarities. I stood rooted to the spot at the entrance for the next couple of minutes, taking in its kitchen, dining room, and small living room, followed by two bedrooms, one on each side.

  Julio had immediately gone into the first bedroom to my right, returning a minute later with a nod of approval. “It’s clear.” Two words I’m starting to believe I’m going to become accustomed to hearing during this trip now that he’s in full bodyguard mode.

  With permission now granted, I enter soon after and toss myself on the bed, staring straight up into the ceiling. Missing Matt since this morning, I immediately call him hoping his soothing voice will help take the tension of the trip away. He immediately answers, but from the surrounding noise, I can already tell he isn’t at home.

  “Hey, beautiful,” he says into the phone, tugging a smile on my lips.

  “Hi,” I reply, feeling a pang of disappointment that I’m not with him. “How did your trip go?” he asks as the noise slowly starts to tone down.

  “Good. Where are you?”

  “We decided to grab a drink at the Brewhouse. It isn’t the same without you here, though,” he tells me, making a smile creep up my lips.

  “You’re not serenading anyone else while I’m gone, are you?” I tease him with the smile still on my lips as I think back to the last time I was there.

  “No one here worth singing to.”

  His words tug at my hea
rt and an awkward silence grows between us. “Hey, Matt, your food is on the table,” a voice similar to Trey’s announces in the background. “Yeah, I’ll be there in a minute,” Matt replies to them, already causing me to grow disappointed knowing the inevitable will come. I will have to end the call with Matt.

  “Can I call you later, beautiful?”

  The dreaded question has caused my heart to sink. “Sure, but if I don’t answer it’s because I’m sleeping. I’m really exhausted from the trip,” I tell him, truly feeling completely drained at this point.

  “Of course. I’ll just talk to you in the morning, then,” he tells me. I’m about to tell him that I take my earlier words back and for him to just call me, but he’s already adding, “Call me when you wake up. I’ll talk to you then,” gutting me in the stomach and adding to my already shattering heart.

  “Promise,” I force myself to reply, but barely manage above a whisper.

  “I love you,” he says into the phone. The sincerity of the words helps me reply with, “I love you, more,” before we completely end the call.

  THE ANNOUNCER REVS up the crowd by requesting more noise. The excited roar of screams and hollers travels through my body and ignites my blood. The feeling of being surrounded in a crowd of excited runners ready to cross the start line will always feel surreal. An excited tremble runs up and down my body, encouraging me to yell along with them.

  My excitement is slightly broken when Julio begins speaking. “Why did you choose this morning, of all mornings, to run this race?”

  “What’s wrong with today?”

  He raises his brow as if I’m the one not understanding the question. “The fact that I can see my own breath in the air suggests that it’s too cold to be out running.”

  His words do remind me how cold it is, sending a shiver down my body. But I’m too excited to let it affect me. “Oh, come on. You’ll warm up before you know it,” I excitingly let out as the crowd starts screaming again.

  “You’ll have to remember to keep your pace slow. If you have to, walk,” Julio orders. Appalled at his words, I look at him as if he’s lost his mind. Does he really expect me to walk?

  “Are you giving me this advice for your benefit or mine?” I ask in a teasing tone.

  He snickers. “Both. If Mateo finds out I let you run this race and you injure yourself, he’ll have my head,” he replies, and from the way he’s worriedly looking around, I honestly believe he’s telling the truth.

  I can’t resist laughing at his comment. “Just look at this race as another one of our daily runs,” I suggest, making him snicker once more. “It’s just three miles. You can handle it.” I hear no arguments this time, keeping me happy.

  Ever since the night I went for a run with Matt, I haven’t been able to resist running again. I’d done as my physical therapist had advised me to do when I’d planned on returning to running, but I quickly discovered running on a treadmill was not my thing. I grew frustrated of feeling like a hamster on a wheel. My legs were moving, but I felt stuck in the same place. If running without music felt frustrating, I soon discovered what could top that notion. Two tries later and I’d given up on the notion. I immediately called the hotel concierge to find a bike for Julio and have it delivered to my room, ASAP. Julio, on the other hand, was a little disappointed. He enjoyed having me run indoors. It gave him the opportunity to exercise and lift weights at the same time as I ran, and still manage to protect me by keeping an eye on me.

  “Just keep my advice in mind,” Julio reminds me, breaking my thoughts. “I still don’t see why we’re running this thing,” Julio mumbles as his body shudders next to me.

  Ignoring his bickering, I think hard for the answer to his question. Boredom. It’s the reason why I’m running this race. I’d been searching for things to do in New York in hopes to help distract me and this small charity race had popped up. The race addict in me immediately signed Julio and I up.

  I feel the crowd stepping forward, telling me we’re about to begin. Looking to Julio one final time, I put one ear bud in and hold the other. “Follow my lead. I mainly stay to the outside, unless I get blocked. If that happens, I try to find an inside pocket,” I explain.

  He gives me a short nod in understanding right before the gun goes off and we start jogging forward. It isn’t the sprint I would have loved to start off with, but I’m happy to be running the race at all, reminding me that I haven’t felt this carefree in days.

  New York wind in the midst of winter is brutal. It can feel as if needles are piercing your skin as it crashes against your body. With the distance we start putting behind us, my fingers slowly become numb. My nose is starting to drip with snot; graphic, yes, I know, but it’s exactly what’s occurring with every footstep I add to my mile. The sun is barely rising on the horizon. My body is protesting the need to be out at this moment, along with Julio who is now glaring off into the distance at no particular object.

  My mind is lost to Tiësto’s beat pounding in my ears; the lyrics of All of Me on repeat for my run. It’s the only song I’m happy running to nowadays. The image of Matt is the boost of motivation to reach my daily goal as I run in the bitter cold of New York’s weather.

  Soon, my mind is quickly returning to the day I left Portland… And Matt.

  “I really miss you, beautiful,” Matt’s sorrowed voice echoes in my mind.

  They are the words that seem to be heard often now during my conversations with Matt. How can I blame him? They are the same words I feel repeating in my soul every minute of my day.

  “How much longer until I get to see you?” The dreadful question he asked last night resurfaces in my thoughts.

  “I don’t know, Matt, but I miss you just as much,” I answered back.

  “I can’t wait to hold you again in my arms.” A painful reminder of where I miss being the most… His arms. I’ve tried to stay strong despite our distance; yet it’s much harder than I expected. My mind can’t help but think of him every chance I get.

  “Abigail!” Julio shouts from my side, stopping me from crashing into someone in front of me. I’d been so lost in my thoughts I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going. Weaving my way to their side, I keep running through the bitter cold air that continues to pierce my lungs. Taking a quick glance at Julio, my mind wanders once more, this time to our plane ride from Portland to New York.

  “Here are the rules, Abigail. You may not like them, but you’re paying me to protect you and I can’t do my job if you don’t follow my rules,” Julio sternly orders. “First and foremost, when I give an order, you follow it. No questions asked,” he says, causing me to glower at him.

  “You make me sound like a dog you’re training,” I irritably reply.

  “It’s for your safely, Abigail. Next. I lead. Always.”

  “What happens if I’m abducted from behind?” I joke, but wasn’t expecting him to be so quick to answer.

  “I’m always looking behind my shoulder for you. Plus, your instinct to reach out for me will take over,” he explains, and his point does sound logical. “Back to my original command. I lead, which mean I enter first. I only need two seconds to scan the room before we enter. The entire time I’ll have my hand on my gun and ready to use it, if needed. So you’ll need to get used to that.” The word gun makes me tense.

  I’m already opening my mouth to voice my own concern on that matter, but he holds up his hand to silence me. “It doesn’t always mean I’m going to pull it out, but I do need to be ready to, just in case.” I have no choice but to accept his reasons.

  Nodding in understanding, I ask, “How will we handle my shows? You think they will allow you to lead me down the runway?” I tease.

  Without hesitating, he answers, “We’ll continue as we have been. You’ll remain at my side when moving. When we aren’t, I’ll keep to the shadows as I usually do.” I expect him to go along with my joke, but from the stern expression still on his face, he’s currently all business during this di
scussion.

  “Which brings me to the next rule,” he adds, verifying my thought just moments ago. “If I tell you to run, you will do so.”

  “I thought the point was to stay at your side at all times?” I taunt back at him.

  He sighs with an impassive expression as he ignores my comment. “There may be a chance when I’m fighting off an intruder that I will order you to run. If I say run, you run,” he sternly repeats. “You seek safety in a public place with a crowd. If you’re being followed it makes it easier for you to blend in and harder for your attacker to find you.” I’m still considering his words when he adds, “Your cell phone has a tracking device in it, along with the one the phone company has provided, just in case. I’ll know how to find you if we get separated.”

  His words are appalling. “When the hell did you put a tracking device in my phone?” I ask, turning the device in my hand, expecting to find some sort of hint of the tracker.

  “I didn’t. Mateo did.”

  Snapping my head up, I pierce him with a glare. “He did it for your safety, Abigail,” he replies, making me snicker knowing it sounds typical of Matt.

  My thoughts go back to the day Matt came home with my new phone. Although it was to replace the phone he’d broken, I shouldn’t be surprised he had a tracking device installed in it as well.

  “There will be more rules depending on our location, but these are the most important,” he instructs.

  “How come you haven’t given me these rules before?” I curiously ask.

  “You usually had Mateo or another friend with you, which gave me the benefit of added security. One of them wouldn’t have hesitated to put your safety first,” he states, reminding me of Kelly and the mall incident. “On this tour, I’m alone. I need to be able to count on you to follow orders to keep you alive.”

  Deeply sighing, I agree.

  Time quickly passes when you are lost to your thoughts. I’m brought back to reality when I hear the cheering of the crowd off to my sides as we near the finish line. With a wide smile on my lips, Julio and I both cross it and I feel better than ever.