Dante's Girl (The Paradise Diaries)

by Courtney Cole

  The security guard opens my door and unfastens my seat belt, then helps me from the car.

  “I’m Daniel, miss. And I’ll be by your side until I hand you off to your father. We’ll call him en route. I won’t let anything happen to you.”

  I nod and my eyes are red and burning and the tears are still running down my cheeks. You would think that I would run out of tears but I haven’t. My feet move numbly on their own accord as Daniel escorts me onto the plane. I walk past the lone flight attendant without saying a word.

  Ordinarily, I would be astounded at the lavish airplane. I would be in awe of the luxury that surrounds me here. But right now, in this moment, I don’t care. I curl up on a leather sofa and cry some more.

  Daniel covers me with a soft blanket and he sits across from me. He stares out the window and he lets me cry.

  I can’t think of anything other than Dante.

  I see his face, his smile, his hands. I hear his voice. I hear his laugh. I see the look on his face as he balanced above me in the pool house. And then I see the look on his face right before the Daniella exploded. His eyes were soft, because he’d just found me in the crowd. I’ll never forget that look.

  It was probably the last time that I’ll see it.

  I know it.

  And the last thing he’d said to me this morning was I love you.

  That makes me cry all the harder.

  This can’t be happening.

  Yet it is.

  All of those times that Dante tried telling me how complicated his life is… I didn’t listen. I got frustrated and annoyed. But he was so right. His life was complicated.

  And now it’s over.

  OhMyGod.

  I’m not going to think like that. I’m not going to think that Dante is dead until someone tells me the actual words.

  But the fire. There was so much fire.

  And my heart knows that no one could survive that.

  I picture the piece of fiberglass that floated past me in the bay and I remember how jagged and charred it was. And Dante had been standing on top of that. And if it is in pieces then so is…

  OHMYGOD.

  I can’t think like this.

  I can’t.

  I squeeze my eyes shut and try to think of nothing at all. But it’s hard.

  Impossible.

  And so I torture myself with images from the explosion, Dante’s face, his smile and pretty much everything about him for the entire four and a half hour flight.

  The plane lands at Heathrow International Airport and I watch sightlessly as we taxi into the hangar. Because it’s a private plane, I get to bypass customs and security and I walk down the tunnel into the terminal.

  And my dad is standing there.

  And I start running.

  He grabs me and holds me and I cry onto his shirt.

  “Daddy,” I whimper.

  From behind me, I hear Daniel.

  “You’ll be fine now, miss,” he tells me. And he turns to get back onto the plane.

  I let go of my father and grab Daniel’s arm.

  “Thank you,” I tell him simply. And then I hug him. He seems surprised, but then his arms close around me and he hugs me back.

  “I’m sure they will contact you as soon as they can,” Daniel tells me solemnly. “They’ll let you know what is going on.”

  I nod and I don’t even ask who “they” are. I don’t care. As long as someone contacts me, that’s all that matters.

  Daniel turns and leaves and I turn back to my father.

  “Are you alright?” he asks worriedly. And he’s so anxious that he’s forgetting to use his fake British accent.

  I shake my head and start to cry again and my father doesn’t know what to do. Because I was supposed to have been a boy and he doesn’t know what to do with a crying girl. He pats my back awkwardly.

  “I want to go home,” I whimper. “Can I go home?”

  “To Kansas?” dad asks quietly.

  I nod. “To Kansas. Right now.”

  He sits me in a chair and goes to the find out when the next flight is. And it turns out that there is a flight leaving in an hour with a layover in Amsterdam.

  He buys me a ticket.

  And then he sits with me until it takes off.

  I don’t have anything. Everything I took with me to Caberra and everything that I bought while I was there is still at Giliberti House.

  “I’ll contact them and have it shipped,” Dad promises me.

  I realize too that my cell phone is still in Caberra. I dropped my purse on the beach when the bay exploded.

  “I’ll let your mother know,” my father tells me after I inform him of that. “I’ll let her know that you’re on your way. It will be okay, Reece. Everything will be okay.”

  “No, it won’t,” I whisper. “I’m sick of everyone telling me that it will be okay all of the time. It won’t be okay. Not this time.”

  He pats my back for a while longer because he doesn’t know what to say and then it’s time to board and so he walks me to the gate.

  “Fly safely,” he tells me. And his accent is back now. I hug him tight.

  “I love you, daddy,” I tell him before I turn to walk onto the plane.

  “I know,” he answers. “I love you, too.”

  I hand my boarding pass to the flight attendant and I can’t help but think about doing this very same thing when I flew out of Amsterdam. Dante was on my flight. And everything changed. He changed everything.

  And now he’s gone.

  I gulp back a fresh bout of tears and I drop into the seat.

  I curl up and put my head against the window. I watch the flight crew loading luggage beneath us and I realize that I haven’t once panicked about flying this time. I’m not afraid anymore. And now it doesn’t matter. Because I’m empty inside.

  Nothing matters.

  I close my eyes and embrace the empty feeling in my heart.

  It’s numb and cold and alone.

  And I know I will feel that way for a long time to come.

  I listen to the pilot telling us how we have a one and a half hour flight until we reach Amsterdam, which is where I lay over for a few hours. I close my eyes.

  And somehow, I sleep.

  And I am so tired and emotionally drained that my sleep is dreamless.

  I wake up when the person next to me nudges me and tells me that we’re here and ready to deplane. I nod and say thank you.

  And I wait my turn patiently to get off the plane.

  And I trudge down to the terminal.

  And I step out into the terminal into the masses of swarming people.

  And I look up.

  And there is Dante.

  He is standing in front of me.

  And my heart stops.

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  I’m running.

  I’m in Dante’s arms.

  And he’s kissing me.

  He smells like smoke and fire and carnage. And he’s dirty and his clothes are torn.

  But he’s here.

  And he’s alive.

  Dante is alive.

  “You’re alive,” I whisper over and over. He’s still got his arms wrapped around me and he’s not letting go.

  He pulls away slightly and looks down at me.

  “I’m alive,” he confirms. “And you’re a hard person to catch.”

  I stare at him.

  “It’s your fault,” I tell him. “You designed my evacuation plan. What the hell is an evacuation plan, anyway? And you were supposed to have the security detail taken off of me. And what the hell happened? How are you alive? Everything was on fire. And is your dad alright?”

  We realize that we are once again impeding the flowing traffic, just like we did when we met here the first time. Dante leads me to a nearby seat and we sit and he explains.

  “My father is fine. He’s in the hospital with bruises and minor burns. The explosion threw us far away from the boat, so when it burned, it
didn’t hurt us. Elena is in the hospital with burns, also.”

  “Are you burned?” I immediately begin checking his perfect body for signs of injury. But there is barely anything there for a few little scrapes and a lot of soot.

  “I’m fine,” he tells me.

  “What happened?” I ask in confusion. “I don’t understand.”

  “Nate paid Vincent to rig the yacht to explode. Nate’s father is the Deputy Prime Minister. Do you know what that means? It means his father would be the interim PM if anything should happen to mine. And then more than likely, if he did a good job, he would be appointed the permanent PM. And Nate knew that. At this point, it doesn’t look like his father knew anything about this. But the investigation is ongoing, of course.”

  I am appalled. I knew that there was something about Nate, something off, but I had no idea that he could be so cold and calculating. And poor Mia. She had really been into Vincent and he was just using her to get to Dimitri.

  I mention that to Dante and he nods.

  “Yes. Remember that night on the Daniella? Vincent was the one who suggested to Mia that they sneak onto my boat. He was just casing it out to see where to implant the explosives. And my car accident? I was driving my father’s car. They think that Vincent probably rigged the brakes. That’s why I couldn’t slow down on the curves.”

  And I feel sick.

  What a cold and calculating thing to do.

  And then after that, Vincent sat there and had dinner with Dante even though he knew that Dante would die with Dimitri if all went according to their plan to blow up the boat.

  OhMyGod.

  “That’s horrible,” I murmur. I am curled into Dante’s side, clinging to his arm and I doubt that I am ever letting go of it.

  “You’re alive,” I say again in wonder. I look at his hand and it is long and real and strong. “You’re alive.”

  “I’m alive,” he nods.

  And my heart is singing. It’s singing Caberran songs that I don’t know the words to. It’s singing my favorite songs from when I was a kid. It’s singing bubblegum pop nonsense from the radio. It’s singing anything it can think of to sing because it is just that happy.

  Dante is alive.

  And that is truly all that matters.

  “What do we do now?” I ask him. “Are we going back to Caberra?”

  He stares at me.

  “No.” And he hesitates. “We aren’t. Reece, you’re going to Kansas, just like you were planning. I’m going to return to Caberra because there are going to be investigations and trials and whatnot because of this whole mess. So I have to be there. But I don’t want you there right now. We aren’t completely sure that Nate and Vincent were the only two people involved. I can’t risk your life. You’re going somewhere safe.”

  I freeze.

  My heart stops again.

  “Without you?” I whisper. “No.”

  I just got him back. There’s no way in hell that I am going to fly to Kansas when Dante is alive and well and sitting next to me holding my hand.

  No.

  Way.

  In.

  Hell.

  “Reece,” and Dante’s voice is firm. “I’m not risking your safety. I was frantic earlier when I couldn’t find you. I’ve never been as scared as I was today. And not for myself—I was scared for you. And I disobeyed my own evacuation plan to get to you. Russell is furious.”

  I finally notice that Dante’s security team is situated at strategic locations around us. And Russell is only a stone’s throw away. And Dante is right. Russell doesn’t look happy.

  But then, Russell never looks happy.

  “But Dante,” I begin but Dante is already shaking his head.

  “No buts,” he tells me. “We’ll figure something out later, but you can’t be in Caberra right now. It’s not safe.”

  And I know that’s it. His decision is final and he’s not going to change his mind.

  “This is not goodbye,” Dante adds. “It’s just goodbye for now. I love you and you love me. We’ll figure something out.”

  “We’ll figure something out?” I ask dubiously. “Like what? I’ll be thousands of miles and an ocean away. You’re going to forget about me.”

  And now I sound pathetic.

  But hey, my boyfriend almost just got blown to pieces and I thought he was dead. I deserve a little latitude.

  “Reece.”

  Dante is looking into my eyes and there is dirt smudged on his cheek. I reach up with shaking fingers to wipe it away and he grabs my hand and kisses it.

  “I love you. I love everything about you. I love the way you laugh and your American accent and the way you never doubt that you can do something. You just always assume that you can. I love that. I love you. And we will make this work. There is no one for me in the entire world but you.”

  How can I argue with that?

  “Okay,” I whisper. And I lay my head on his broad shoulder and soak him in because I’ve only got him for a couple more hours.

  After a few minutes, we get up and walk to a little restaurant in the airport.

  And for the next two hours, two hamburgers and four sodas, we talk and laugh and I stare at him because I still need to reassure myself that he is safe and sound.

  And beautiful and strong.

  But then it’s time to go.

  And nothing is fine.

  “It will be okay,” Dante tells me as he reaches over and tucks my hair behind my ear.

  “That’s exactly what Daniel told me,” I say.

  “And Daniel was correct,” Dante points out. “And so am I.”

  “Okay,” I nod.

  But my heart is breaking. Because it’s been through a lot lately and honestly, I just don’t know how much more it can take.

  Dante walks me to the terminal. And he kisses me gently as they announce that the passengers are loading.

  “I don’t want to go,” I tell him painfully. And it is painful because my heart isn’t finished breaking yet. “This is horrible. This does not feel okay.”

  Dante smiles and it looks like he is forcing it.

  “It’s not fun,” he admits. “But think of it this way. Two hours ago, you thought I was dead. And I’m not. So everything is fine, remember?”

  Well, if he wants to put it that way.

  I nod. And he kisses me again and I walk into the tunnel leading to the plane.

  I turn and look and Dante waves, blowing me a kiss.

  He makes blowing a kiss look sexy.

  But I roll my eyes anyway and pretend to catch it.

  And then he rolls his eyes.

  I laugh and turn around so that he doesn’t see me crying as I walk away.

  * * *

  Kansas is hot.

  Kansas is freaking hot.

  Kansas is hell’s kitchen hot…. As in the devil standing over a hot stove stirring boiling tar hot.

  And that Is. Freaking. Hot.

  The heat plows into me like a brick wall as I walk out the backdoor of the farmhouse letting the screen door slam before heading out to the barn.

  As I walk into the barn, where it isn’t a bit cooler, only somewhat shadier, the barn cats scatter at my presence. Mischief nickers from his stall, but I’m not here to ride him right now. I’m here for privacy. I see my grandpa through the back barn door. He’s out in the pasture working on an irrigation head, so he’ll be tied up for awhile.

  I’m carrying my laptop and I climb up into my dark little cubbyhole in the hay loft. It’s breathtakingly hot up here, but it’s the only place that I can be alone lately. And it’s just close enough that I still get the wireless reception from the house.

  I pull up my email.

  And my heart quickens because there is a note from Dante.

  To: Reece Ellis
  From: Dante Giliberti
  Subject: I miss you

  Kansas,

  Just a note to tell you that I
miss you. Giliberti House isn’t the same since you are gone. And so I’m staying at the Old Palace for now. It makes it easier with all the legal stuff going on for Nate.

  We found out for sure this morning that Nathaniel didn’t know anything. But he’s so mortified by the scandal that he tendered his resignation. I feel badly because I like Nathaniel. He’s a decent guy.

  I hope that all is well in Kansas and that you haven’t forgotten about me. How’s Quinn, by the way? (No, I’m not jealous. Well, maybe just a little).

  Anyway, I’ll call you tonight. I miss the sound of your voice. I can’t believe you’ve been gone for three weeks already. It feels like forever. But I’ll talk to you tonight.

  All my love,

  Dante

  I sigh and close the laptop. I should answer, but it makes me too sad to email him. It makes me feel so alone when I remember that he is thousands of miles away. I want to look at him and talk to him and smell him. I just want to be with him. Is that so much to ask?

  I stare down at my arm and twist the sunflower bracelet on my wrist. Thank God I was wearing it the day of the Regatta. Because it’s here with me now and every time I look at it, I’m reminded of Dante.

  As if everything else doesn’t remind me of him, too.

  “Reece?”

  I hear Becca calling for me just a scant second before her brown hair pokes up over the top of the hayloft ladder.

  “Why do you come up here?” she demands as she climbs up. “It’s hotter than hell up here.”

  “It’s hotter than hell down there, too,” I tell her.

  She’s only wearing cut-offs and a bikini top, so she ought to be cool enough. I tell her that and she rolls her eyes.

  “Today was the car wash for Student Council. You were supposed to be there. Did you forget?”

  Crap. I nod. “I totally forgot. I’m sorry. But I wasn’t even supposed to be here right now, so surely it isn’t that big a deal.”

  “No, it’s fine,” she agrees. “But I would have liked to have you there. All Drew and Jason did was stare at me and Alyssa while we did all the work.”

  “Well, if you didn’t want people to stare, you shouldn’t have worn a bikini,” I tell her absently.

  In my head, I’m already composing an email to Dante. I have changed my mind about answering him. Even though it makes me sad, it’s better than dealing with this trivial kind of B.S. And it’s funny. Now that I’ve come back from Caberra after Dante was almost killed, everything sort of feels like it’s B.S. It’s sort of good. It makes me realize the important things in life.