Extol of Agnatic Dreams (The Extol Series Book 1)

by Jennifer R. Kenny

  Viviana decided to ignore Teagan’s new outburst. It would not be the last and if they tried to console her every time, Evangeline would leave only half prepared for her future. The more serious of the three, Viviana was studying Evangeline’s dress and ensuring that Teagan had not stained it with her tears or damaged the fabric where she clung to Evangeline. Viviana had been concerned about the material since she first saw it. It was gorgeous, the colour rich and beautiful even when it was just material but she was worried on just how it would handle the treatment of a long journey. Her fears had been ill-treated apparently because even after an attack from Teagan the layers of fabric hung from Evangeline’s frame exactly as they should. Relieved Viviana moved forward to readjust things that didn’t need to be adjusted.

  Evangeline’s stomach was in new and tighter knots after this display from Teagan and she wished she could move to help Teagan select her items simply because Evangeline needed the distraction. With nothing to do, her mind was left to wander new and strange ideas about Braykith. She would re-examine all she knew of the Kingdom and again wonder could she hope to find familiarity in such an odd place. All three girls had moved into their own realm of thoughts at this moment and there would be no breaking it. Evangeline couldn’t hope to speak now regardless of the tension in the room. The month leading up to today had been filled with promises, but it was only today that Evangeline was worried if any of those promises would come to pass in reality.

  When it was said, Evangeline had only the purest of intentions. She would miss her friends. She would write, and of course, she was sure they could visit. Remembering them now, they felt like lies. They felt broken in her own memory. She dreaded to think what Teagan and Viviana felt about them. Did they know when they were told that it would not be as she imagined? Had Evangeline been so lost to be the only one who believed them? She would never make such claims if she didn’t mean to make them real. She knew so little though about her new home that all she could do was hope that the frightful tales were nothing more than a rumour.

  Viviana’s hands clasped around Evangeline’s, holding them still. She didn’t even realise that she had been shaking, her nails picking at the skin that sat around her nail beds. It was a new tick she had developed recently and it appeared she would not be losing it anytime soon. Viviana checked the tender skin but none of the newly exposed sections bled. An improvement on last time Evangeline had attacked herself out of nerves.

  Viviana had to say the words she had been thinking out loud just because she was naïve. If she said them aloud, the words would gain power all of their own and perhaps that would be enough to force a calm over the girls. “Iloh gave this path to you Eva.” The three girls closed their eyes momentarily and their heads bowed the slightest as they did so. It was the Crimah custom at the naming of their house Saint. While most of the religious observations were given to the great spirit of Xado, each province tended to have a minor entity who took their offerings on behalf of Xado. “He challenges us all.”

  “But only gives us the challenges we can handle.” Evangeline finished the words for her friend although her heart was not quite in it as much as she wished it was. She had heard a lot of advice recently from all kinds of people, but it was mostly recycled now. How many ways can one be encouraged to look out into the future? Evangeline was sure the answer was three. No matter how it was delivered, there was little difference in the suggestions. Regardless of the different inflections of one's voice and the delivery might be a little different depending on the source but it was all just the same advice.

  Honestly, Evangeline appreciated it even if it seemed she did not. She really did want to leave her home with fond memories and solid advice from those she valued. However, she felt that the information was all imaginary as so few had done as she was about to do. Some days it seemed hardly fair to offer her counsel with so little merit to give that advice real weight. The advice never did make her feel better about leaving but if they both believed that Braykith was destiny and the destination a gift from the Gods themselves, then Evangeline felt right in leaving. She need to be at ease with her situation since. There was no opportunity to stay even if she wanted to.

  Viviana did seem to have a sixth sense when it came to Evangeline’s thoughts, and while she did not offer physical comfort, she always had words. “This will also be exciting, as well as scary.” Viviana tried to include Teagan, who was wiping her eyes on the corner of a handkerchief. Teagan gave her nothing in return. She seemed firmly lost in her own thoughts, and so Evangeline felt herself nodding because it seemed like Viviana was waiting for some kind of response and Teagan was not going to assist.

  “Not only for Eva but also for ourselves.” Viviana was trying hard to get Teagan involved. It seemed though that Teagan might start fresh tears at any moment, even if the gentle prodding was to further her involvement and not exclude her. Evangeline seemed it might be better to leave her alone, but Viviana did not let up in her determination to have an ordinary conversation. “Since you will no longer be here Evangeline, your father has offered our services to others within the province.”

  Evangeline was intrigued by this progress. She suddenly realised in her haste to simultaneously embrace and reject this development in her life she had given no thought to Teagan and Viviana. Evangeline was not sure on why it had been declared, but Quintus had made it clear to her father, and Barret had made it more explicit to Evangeline, that no one should accompany her to Braykith. She had never lived without her best friends and to lose them was like losing a limb but there was no bargaining for this and all three girls had quietly agreed to this change.

  “I hope that the ladies from Braykith will be able to accommodate to my needs as thoroughly as you both did.” Evangeline was sure it wouldn’t be possible. “I hope these new positions are appropriate for your skills.” She was teasing just a little but she also had a nightmare vision of her friends being stuck in the laundry rooms. Instantly, Evangeline could imagine Teagan beating stained clothes against stones. It was not a good thought to have, even if it was only fantasy. Viviana can be far less cooperative than Teagan could be.

  “I am going to the school,” Viviana announced, a light in her eyes as she mentioned it. Evangeline had never seen that response in her friend before and she wondered if somehow she had been holding her back even though her station and privilege extended to her friends in most things. “I cannot lead a class but your father is sure I will be a welcoming and inspirational presence in the room.”

  Evangeline had seriously underestimated her friend’s ambition if the idea of being within the classroom walls appealed to her. Only the most intriguing and ingenious minds were given the responsibility of instruction. She hoped her father was not giving Viviana a false hope in something she may never attain. Viviana’s excitement was rather plain to see, decorating the girl’s face as they talked about what would happen now that Evangeline was leaving the home proper.

  “You have been to most of my lessons. I am sure you will indeed be everything my father boasts you to be and more.” Evangeline hoped she sounded more reasonable than she felt. The shock was not in the position but rather in the reaction from Viviana in sharing the news. Shocked still and all too aware of the actions during the day, her emotions were hard to judge as genuine. Every moment seemed to be the moment of life and death. Evangeline had taken Viviana’s hand, the barest of contact and a small squeeze before the contact was ceased abruptly.

  “I am going to another family.” Teagan was not looking much better than before but she seemed to be able to speak without fear of tears. Her voice no longer wobbled with emotion; her breath had evened out. It seemed, for now, Teagan could handle herself. It was never certain how long this control would remain intact.

  “Do they have children?” Evangeline was hopeful. While Viviana might be able to be of use within the formal education of the province, Teagan would not have such luxuries. She was endearing but seldom smart. Teagan was usefu
l to Evangeline but she was in no place to give instruction to others. She was good at her job now, and Evangeline did hope that perhaps she could be useful in the same capacity.

  “Four,” Teagan answered and on seeing the overwhelmed expressions on their faces she chuckled even though it was void of the life her chuckle usually held. “Three of them boys, but I am going to assist with their daughter. She is only seven, but with everything I have learned here, I should be good at helping her become a real young lady with welcoming attributes for marriage.”

  “That sounds encouraging.” Evangeline said but all she got in return was a shrug. While it seemed that Viviana was excited about her new life and possibilities, and yet Teagan was not. It was a difficult thing to witness and yet Evangeline could not be sure of how best to handle this shift in their dynamic. She could not bring Teagan with her. “Think of all the new and interesting people you will meet.”

  While that line might have been a comfort to Teagan, who enjoyed meeting new people, it did not help Viviana in the slightest. This was the first time Viviana could ever imagine a life while not with Evangeline, and the possibilities made her feel lightheaded and giddy. There were also times where she was afraid of what could come next. Her life had been a mix of privilege and hard times, never quite accepted in either. Viviana was not sure how she was supposed to react to these changes and events, but tears would solve nothing. She was going to be excited about the future even if it meant the end of the only life she knew.

  “Perhaps before the end of the next winter, we will all be with new husbands.” The statement had come from Viviana and Evangeline frowned as she recognised the voice. It seemed like something Teagan would say. Just mentioning the perhaps someday husband had already made her brighten up. Did Viviana hate her station here at Evangeline’s side? She was slowly starting to suspect that it might be closer to the truth than anyone realised. Viviana was included on that list.

  There was no time to ask. A rapping on her door forced Teagan to act. The young kitchen boy stood awkwardly in the doorframe, trying not to look but couldn’t find a way to look away either. It wasn’t often he was given orders to come to this section of the manor. Mostly he was lucky to see beyond the kitchens. He was barely an apprentice. He didn’t enter the room and only spoke quietly with Teagan before he was off again, not looking back.

  Evangeline watched him flee their room, knowing the news that was about to be delivered. There would be no more talking, no more pretending this was just some kind of dress rehearsal. Whatever had not been said was not going to come to pass. Smoothing down her front, Evangeline nodded, resigned to her fate before Teagan could even announce it.

  “The carriage is ready for you.” She barely finished before the tears were back and Viviana had no more advice to give.

  CHAPTER TWO

  Evangeline knew exactly how far she had been before in her life. Now she was sitting in the back of her carriage alone with nothing but the horses’ hooves to listen to, Evangeline watched that tree approach. She had not been this far from the manor in a long time. The political climate was too uncertain to risk her being taken by rebels that continued to plot against them. Her father was exceedingly cautious with her in fear of breaking the pact which had earned the small province of Crimah a reputation of powerful friends.

  Once upon a time though there had been peace in the realm of Accila and the very idea that someone could and snatch her was a fevered dream. She had been young, somewhere within the age range of ten or so. Adventure was the name of the game, the only thing that they desired. Evangeline had gone with Teagan and Viviana to the tree that was quickly approaching her now.

  They had no plans for what to do once they reached the tree. Viviana had been content to walk and Teagan had spoken nonstop about something that seemed important to her but never did seem that important to anyone else. The tree had been chosen because it was the furthest landmark they could spot from her bedroom window. Spontaneous and with only a single guard, the girls had walked for hours before finally placing their palms against the tree. It had been a grand adventure, and now the tree passed her carriage quickly as if it stood for nothing.

  Every surge forward from the horses that were carrying Evangeline further from her home was felt. With very little else to do Evangeline was trying to remember when Viviana had promised her that this was supposed to be something exciting, perhaps even something to look forward to. Much like the childish spree to the tree, this was also a grand adventure.

  Even as Evangeline tried to convince herself, the truth would not stay buried. The adventure to the tree had been safe. A single guard following behind the girls as they laughed and sang to the furthest point from the manor without losing sight of the tallest windows. If they had been attacked, he would have barely stood a chance against a group of the enemy, but Evangeline still could not believe the danger was ever that close.

  The fundamental difference that nagged at her subconscious as the carriage bounced off the rocks in the mountain pass was that this adventure was not to her own home. Evangeline was travelling out of her home borders for the first time and she tried hard to make excitement come but it never came to her.

  She had been sad on her departure, uncertain on what news would come to reach her in the following months as Viviana and Teagan moved on without her. For a moment, the barest flash of a second, there had been a sense of wonder. A simple and romantic notation inspired by the tales of the Braykith castle. Sweeping staircases and hidden passages. But that was short lived and quickly replaced with that familiar feeling of cold dread in the pit of her stomach.

  Outside the carriage, as night began to fall for the second time on her journey, the trees were starting to change. The first borders of her province were passing by underfoot; the wheels were not showing any sign of care for the blood that had been spilt in claiming it. Over the years, her father had been expanding and creating a more powerful empire. Their official borders were starting to become less defined and heavily blurred with their neighbours. Evangeline had always known the trees, though. The trees of her home spread out as if they wanted to play with you. The trees that inhabited the borders of Braykith pointed straight up and into the heavens as if being bound of the ground by their roots terrified them and they too look to Xado and his other Gods for answers.

  The tree’s branches were rigid and green, although these were not the kind of branches Evangeline was familiar with and they did not match the season. Her curiosity for this blurred confusion of homeland and other was shut down, and any illusions she had of finding necessary comforts was quickly put to rest. The trees here did not want to help along in her ride. They felt cold and were not accommodating to her plight. Frustrated by her own thoughts, Evangeline shut the curtains over her windows as if that would be enough to convince her all was well. She did not know what kind of soil could promote the growth of such trees and she did not wish to see.

  Evangeline collected up the book that lay next to her and opened its pages to her marked place. Her eyes fell on the words, and she read along with them but the information could not be retained. Although the scenery had been blocked effectively by the curtains, she could still feel their plight. She found herself staring at the curtains again, and quickly Evangeline brought them back to her book. Again her eyes glazed over the words and she spoke them to herself as she read but she could not recall detail. The tugging feeling of being watched continued.

  She slammed the book shut and shoved it back into the seat just as she done when she tried to read it the first time. Evangeline had attempted cross stitch early in the trip but the roads were not smooth like they were closer to the manor. Quickly it became apparent that there would be very little that could distract her from her own mind, even if the roads did give way to a less bumpy ride. When it was not the trees and the eerie feeling of being watched that obsessed her mind, it was Glais and the unanswered questions.

  The questions never changed, her own voice sounding
odd as it bounced around her own skull to the sound of the wheels hitting small stones. Since she had no further insight to the man she was due to marry, Evangeline had nothing new to add to her personal dilemma. Refusing to waste any more time on what might be or could be with Glais, Evangeline had spent the last hour obsessing over a bread pudding recipe. She worked on remembering the measurements of ingredients, the way her mother would assemble them in large pots and how she would take the lids off just enough to fill the kitchen with the smell of bread and cinnamon.

  The old favourite did what she hoped and calmed her mind. The peace did not last, however. Once she had all the ingredients right in her thoughts, she wondered if anyone in her new Kingdom had even heard of it. She knew that some foods were localised to the region. Apparently, the crops that grew and flourished within Crimah might not do so well within Braykith. From the stories she heard, she was surprised that anything at all grew. The people of Braykith did not starve, so some of the rumours of ash and alkaline earth had to be exaggerated at the very least.

  Her worry for the recipe being unknown grew. What if they had heard of it but they could not gather the ingredients or prepare them as they should be to recreate the taste as she remembered it. Panicked at the very notion of such a pure luxury being taken from her Evangeline realised she was acting silly, and the thought was sobering for her. She tried to be comfortable, which was nearing impossible after being on this bench for this long. The trip to Braykith spanned over two days with barely a break in between. She had taken to sleeping on the floor of her carriage but the sleep did not last.