Box Set #2: Zynn-Zaz'Zia: [The 4 book 2nd Adventure of Egg and the Hameggattic Sisterhood]

by Robert Iannone

  “Birds of a feather . . . I guess.” Sylvia didn’t much care about things like that. “We got another problem.”

  “Great . . . what?” asked her depressed friend.

  “The Valentine’s Day dance.”

  “Why’s that a problem?”

  “Cause you can bet your life that Meggy is going to try and dance with Zeke and Zack.”

  “She wouldn’t dare . . .,” which caused Sylvia to look at her best friend and smirk. “Well, fiddlesticks, what are we supposed to do?”

  “For one thing, we can outdress her. The clothes she brought with her aren’t exactly Hollywood hip.”

  Egg’s face lit up with a mischievous grin. “Maybe we could find something really special for her to wear . . . from Grammy’s attic.”

  “Hmmm . . ., ” said Sylvia giving the suggestion a lot more serious thought than it deserved, “ . . . nah, her stupid culture crystal would probably warn her that the Roaring 20’s is out of style.” Actually, it had been out of style for about thirty years by the time Grammy was twelve.

  “Well, forget about her . . . what are you going to wear?’

  “I was just going to do the college preppy thing with a plaid skirt and sweater. But now that seems way too dorky. How about you?”

  “My mother wanted me to wear a dress,” and Egg put her hands around her neck and pretended to squeeze so hard that her tongue flopped out and her eyes rolled back inside her head.

  “Let’s go shopping.”

  “You have any money?”

  “About thirty dollars. You?”

  “I still have that hundred dollar bill Grammy gave me for my birthday.”

  “That should be enough . . . for something.”

  “How are we going to get there?” The girls were actually home alone; something that rarely happened. But Egg’s sister Ashley was a freshman at college and her parents had gone to check out an estate sale about five miles away. (They lived to go antiquing). Since the girls were now in middle school and Sylvia’s mom was only two blocks away, the Graystone’s agreed to let the girls stay by themselves for the morning.

  “My mom would take us . . . but she and her friends are baking.” There was a bake sale at their church the next day.

  “I guess I could call Grammy.”

  “No, don’t.” Egg’s grandmother lived on the edge of town . . . about three miles away. “She does too much for us already.”

  “Then what?”

  Sylvia just shrugged. She then leaned back against the pillows and her eye caught the reflection of the morning light off of her ring. She absently touched it with the fingers on her right hand while trying to figure out how they could get to the mall. Then she glanced down at her ring and her eyes went wide. “OH MY GOSH”.

  “What?”

  “Our rings.”

  “Yeah . . . so?”

  “If they can take us to Aerianna which is like a gazillion miles away, why can’t they take us to the mall?”

  “Don’t move,” Egg told her friend. She then touched her ring and disappeared. A couple of seconds later, she was back wearing an ear-to-ear grin. “Good thinking, Feminion . . . it works.”

  *****

  They made their way to Tops to Bottoms, a local clothes chain that was popular with middle and high school kids. The store had a great selection and all the merchandise was very reasonably priced.

  But the good news was also the bad news . . . a great selection meant that the girls had to try on dozens and dozens of tops and skirts and pants and vests and boots in every conceivable combination. After about two hours, they had narrowed their choices.

  “How about this?” said Sylvia as she came out of the dressing room.

  “Isn’t that what what’s-her-name wore in last month’s Teenie’s magazine?’

  “Maybe,” answered Sylvia coyly.

  “Well . . . you look totally too cute.” Then after admiring her friend from every angle, she added, “Would it be like really weird if I wore the same outfit?” She was only half joking.

  “I think your mom was right . . . you should wear a dress.”

  “Better yet, you wear a dress and I’ll wear that outfit.”

  “Like that’s going to happen.”

  “I should never have brought you back,” said Egg with a mischievous grin. She was referring to the time in the Never ’Glade when Sylvia had been bitten by the Tack-Toed Tick. Once that happens, you disappear and everyone forgets you ever existed. Lucky for her . . . and everyone else as it turned out . . . Egg had written so much about her best friend in her diary that she was able to bring her back.

  “You’re never going to let me forget that, are you?”

  “Probably not.”

  “Well, not only am I not going to let you wear this, you’re going to pay for the privilege of seeing me ‘so royally attired”. She said the last part with a voice that was a pretty good imitation of the Princess. “Now fork over that hundred dollar bill.”

  “Yes, your Majesty,” said Egg bowing low.

  “You’re a good girl . . . for one not of royal birth,” and they both giggled. Making fun of M’egg-Alynnia was always so enjoyable.

  *****

  They paid for the clothes and decided to walk the Mall before heading home. Egg still needed to find an outfit. And even though she was out of money, she could always beg her mom or grandmother to contribute to the ‘If-I-don’t-get-a-great-outfit-for-the-dance-I’ll-just-crawl-under-a-rock-and-die fund.’

  They stopped at several stores but were content with just looking through the windows at the mannequins. Unfortunately, the only outfits that caught their eye were at Hollywood Holly’s . . . the most expensive store in town, if not in the whole world.

  It was so pricey that they had never, ever shopped there. But they did like to look at the clothes just to see what the in-fashions were. Then, if they found something they simply had to have, they’d go buy an inexpensive copy over at Tops to Bottoms.

  As they looked through the window and oohed and ahhed at the wonderful clothes, they heard a truly awful sound . . . M’egg-Alynnia’s voice.

  “I do believe I know these two ragamuffins.”

  Egg and Sylvia turned to see the Princess standing there holding a large bag from the store. Standing next to her was none other than the homecoming queen herself . . . Isadora. She, too, was holding a store bag.

  Izzy looked at the two sixth graders to be certain that they weren’t anybody important. Satisfied, she turned to her companion and said, “Let’s go. I’m dying to get home and try these on again.”

  Megg actually ignored her friend so she could irritate Egg and Sylvia. “I am surprised that you two can actually shop here. Izzy has told me that the merchandise is considered very expensive. Surely it is far beyond your meager means.”

  Egg glared at the Princess. “How come you’re shopping here? I don’t remember Daz . . . ummm, my grandmother giving you any money.”

  “She obviously did not consider the possibility that I would actually have to pay for something. I am sure she assumed that everything I needed would be provided. However, since that was not the case, my dear friend Izzy has kindly purchased these clothes for me.” Izzy was known to be from a wealthy family. “And if you are wondering which outfits we chose for the dance, I would never dream to keep you in suspense. That outfit there is the one I shall wear . . .” She pointed at one of the mannequins . . .

  “. . . and Izzy will be wearing that one . . .”

  The girls looked at the two outfits and were immediately overwhelmed by envy. They were to-die-for.

  “Well, we do have to run,” and she turned her back on the girls and walked away.

  Stunned into silence by this unexpected encounter, they watched the Princess and the Queen saunter away, swinging their bags back and forth . . . obviously without a care in the world.

  After they disappeared around the corner, Sylvia said, “They’re going to look incredible.” In her mind, she
was picturing Zack staring at those two in their hot little outfits.

  Egg was thinking just like her friend. “If she gets within twenty feet of Zeke, I’m going to scratch her eyes out,” she hissed.

  “Come on . . . let’s find you something to wear.”

  “What’s the use . . . how can I compete against someone like that?”

  “Because you’re Egg . . . and you’re not afraid of anyone or anything.”

  “Yeah, right,” her friend answered in a most unconvincing manner.

  Chapter 7 – Stupid Cupid

  “I absolutely can’t wear this.”

  “Why not? You look cute.”

  “MOTHERRRR” whined an exasperated Egg “I look like a freak.”

  “Sweetheart . . . trust me, you look terrific.”

  “That’s it . . . I’m going back to Aerianna and lose myself in the Maze of Forever.”

  “I have no idea what you’re talking about. Is that some kind of video game or someplace in Warthog? (She meant Hogwarts, the castle-like school from Harry Potter).

  Egg had momentarily forgotten that her mother didn’t know anything about her secret life as Flying Girl or about her Quest to help Dazzle. Pretending as if she was just talking nonsense, she answered with, “Yeah . . . something like that.”

  “Anyway . . . it’s too late to go shopping now. Sylvia’s on her way over and the boys will be here any minute to pick you two up.”

  “Just tell them I’m sick. I think I’m getting a fever because I’m probably coming down with malaria or chicken pox or the measles. That’s it . . . the measles. Tell them I’m highly contagious and they have to stay at least a mile away.”

  “Oh, stop that now,” insisted her mom. “You look wonderful.”

  “Let me wear the other outfit . . . please.”

  “NO. I’m taking it back tomorrow. And I’m going to give your grandmother a lecture about what’s appropriate dress for a twelve-year-old girl. Now, finish combing you hair and come downstairs.” Mrs. Graystone turned and left the room.

  The outfit that Egg had purchased with the financial help from Grammy was so great . . .

  . . . but when she got home and tried it on, her mother went ballistic.

  “No daughter of mine is going to wear that . . . that . . . whatever that is. And what the heck does seven mean anyway?”

  “It’s just my lucky number (as in the number of sisters in the Hameggattic Sisterhood, she thought to herself).”

  “Well . . . way too tight and altogether too much skin showing. Now go and try on that other outfit,” and she stormed out of the room.

  So here she was . . . wearing this terrible shift. She felt like screaming and crying. Then, after looking at herself again in the mirror, she almost touched her ring so she could travel to Aerianna and hide. But, that might’ve been hard to explain.

  How was she going to face Zeke? She just knew he was going to laugh.

  Worse . . . M’egg-Alynnia and her friends were going to go nuts making fun of her. This was a disaster.

  “Egg . . .,” her mother yelled. “Sylvia is here.”

  “Send her up . . . please.”

  Sylvia rushed up the stairs expecting to find her girlfriend in the hot little outfit that she had just bought. Instead, when she opened the bedroom door, her eyes popped wide at the shock of what she was seeing. After an embarrassing moment of silence, she said, “Your mom didn’t like it, I guess?”

  “Hated it . . . she’s taking it back tomorrow.”

  “Well . . . that’s kind of cute,” Syl said half-heartedly.

  “No, it’s not. I feel like I’m back in fifth grade.”

  “It’s not that bad,” lied her friend.

  Egg sat back on the bed with her shoulders slumped forward. “Wait till Meggy gets an eyeful of me. I can hear her now . . ., ‘Oh, you poor thing. I hadn’t realized how desperately needy your family must be. Perhaps when I am finished with this outfit, I will donate it to you.”

  Sylvia laughed at the great impersonation. “Not quite . . . Meggy would never say the word hadn’t. She doesn’t use contractions.”

  For the briefest of moments, Egg forgot her self-pity. “Really? I never noticed that.”

  “Dazzle doesn’t either.”

  “Geez . . . aren’t you the observant one.”

  “All part of being a good Feminion. Anyway . . . not to interrupt your wallowing in grief . . . but how do I look?”

  “Oh my gosh, I’m sorry. You look absolutely fantastic. At least one of us will show up Princess Obnoxious.”

  Sylvia did a little curtsey. But before she could give her friend more words of encouragement, they heard the doorbell.

  “Great . . . just great,” said Egg dejectedly.

  “Zeke isn’t going to laugh or embarrass you.”

  “He’s a boy. It’s in his DNA to be insensitive.”

  “He’s a great guy . . . just like his brother. Now come on . . .” She was anxious to see Zack’s reaction to her outfit, but of course, she didn’t tell Egg that.

  “Let me go first. This way they’ll think your outfit’s just cuter than mine and not that my outfit is uglier than yours.”

  “Wow . . . you must have used a lot of brain power to come up with that. You really are desperate.”

  “If trying to decide whether I should fall down the stairs and break my leg is desperate . . . then I guess I am.”

  Sylvia playfully shoved her friend out the door and down the hall.

  They actually walked down the steps together and at the bottom, they greeted their dates.

  “Hi,” said Egg to Zeke. He was dressed in a red sweater and jeans. One of the amazing things . . . at least to Mrs. Zambroski and Grammy . . . was that the girls could tell the two identical twins apart. Even Mr. Z had trouble doing that sometimes.

  “Hey,” he replied. “Here . . .,” he added without preamble. It was a single red rose.

  “Oh it’s beautiful. Thank you.” Zeke blushed a delicate shade of pink.

  Meanwhile Zack was telling Sylvia how terrific she looked. He was wearing a yellow sweater and jeans. And in his hand was a single yellow rose . . .

  “Is that for me?” Sylvia asked with a smile.

  “Huh . . . oh, yeah. Sorry,” and he handed her the rose.

  “Thank you . . . it’s beautiful,” and she gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. Unlike his brother, he didn’t blush . . . he just grinned and raised his eyebrows in a kind of silly salute.

  Then they all stood there in awkward silence until Zeke remembered, “My mom’s in the car so I guess we should go.”

  So the girls got their coats and Egg handed her mother the two roses.

  “I’ll put the flowers in some water for you. You guys have fun,” she told them as she stood in the doorway and watched them get into the car. She waved at Mrs. Z then went back inside. It was too cold to just stand there.

  *****

  The dance was in the multi-purpose room, which had been decorated by the Social Committee to reflect the spirit of Valentine’s Day . . . creepy looking cupids with bows and arrows, heart-shaped balloons and all of that traditional corny stuff. The band consisted of five kids from eighth grade who called themselves Saint Vitus’ Dance (which was actually kind of clever since that was the name of a little known disease).

  Most of the kids who were planning on attending were already there. The notable exceptions as you probably guessed were M’egg-Alynnia and Izzy. Naturally, one couldn’t make a grand entrance without being fashionably late.

  The four friends ditched their coats and made their way to the refreshment table. Sylvia grabbed Zack’s hand and pulled him along. The other two lagged behind.

  “I’m sorry about this outfit,” apologized Egg.

  Zeke was a great kid . . . but at age twelve, most boys don’t take much notice of what a girl’s wearing unless it was something truly spectacular. “What’s wrong with what you’re wearing?” he asked confused.

 
“It’s awful. I look like I’m in fifth grade.”

  He looked at her and her clothes but had absolutely no idea what she was talking about. “Looks okay to me,” he mumbled uncomfortably. He was sure it was probably the wrong thing to say . . . but he had no clue what the right thing might be.

  “How can you say that? I look stupid.” Egg was horrified that he found her attractive when she was dressed like such a dork. What was wrong with him?

  Poor Zeke . . . in his mind the alarm bells were going off. If he agreed with her and said she looked bad . . . then he’d be in deep trouble. If he didn’t agree with her . . . well apparently he’d be in worse trouble.

  “Ummm . . . well . . .,” then a great idea came to him, “. . . ummm . . . it only looks good because you’re wearing it. On anybody else it wouldn’t look so good.”

  Now that momentarily confused Egg and she went silent as she tried to think of some reason to argue. But she couldn’t. “Well . . . okay then,” was the best she could muster in response. She still wasn’t sure if she should be happy or mad at his comment.

  To Zeke’s relief, they had caught up to his brother and Sylvia. But then all heads turned to the door and everyone went quiet. The Princess and the Queen were making their entrance.

  “Whoa,” said a boy awestruck by the sight.

  “Geez . . . dude,” said another though it was not clear what that meant.

  “Gimme a break,” said a girl under her breath.

  Every girl who came with a boy grabbed for her date’s hand . . . including Egg and Sylvia.

  Not waiting for Zack to say the wrong thing, Syl asked him, “Wish you were with them?”

  At first Zack didn’t hear the question because he was staring as hard as everyone else. Then when Sylvia tugged his arm and glared at him, he recovered very nicely “. . . No way. They may be eye candy, but you’re the real deal.”