Temporary Home

by Aliyah Burke

  The numerous pictures of her in various stages of growing up hit him low. She looked so happy. She and Ritchie both with their parents. Just another reminder of what he didn’t have. He closed the cover, sighed, and replaced it.

  He walked to the item he’d purchased today and opened the box. Staring down at the object inside he wondered what she would do when—if—he gave it to her.

  Her phone rang and he almost answered it but held off at the last second. He went towards the laundry room to move clothing from the washer to dryer. The sound of a man’s voice on the machine stopped him dead in his tracks.

  “Hey, Roxi, it’s me, Lance. I’m in town for a few days. I’d love to get together. You know my number. Hope to hear from you soon, babe.” Click. The message ended.

  Sam bristled. All over. Who the fuck was Lance and what the hell did he want with Roxi? And why did he care so damn much?

  “Because I’m sleeping with her,” he told the empty room. And he sure as hell had no intentions of sharing her.

  Roxi isn’t yours. More unwanted advice from the brain.

  Unwanted? Perhaps. However, it was true. He had no claim over her. But he knew he wanted one.

  Have to get past your own insecurities if you want that to happen.

  Like he didn’t know that already. He warred with that information and finished the trek to the washer to transfer the clothes to the dryer. Slamming his hands down on the top of the machine, he released a string of curses which would have had Dean looking at him in shock.

  Did he? Did he have enough strength to defeat doubt and take a chance on Roxi? Sam wasn’t sure but he knew he needed to find out.

  Sleep didn’t come that fast and he left early to run some errands with Dean. It was later in the following afternoon when he left Second Chances and was walking downtown looking for a gift for Laila when he froze. Roxi. He knew it was her. His body knew. He’d not seen her in the past two days. When she was home, he was gone and vice versa.

  He’d missed her. Well, bully for him, now he got to see her. And she was with a tall, fit man. Jealously rose within him, tinting his world an ugly shade. The man had his arm around her shoulders and they were laughing and joking as they entered a small diner.

  Why wasn’t she sleeping? More importantly, why was she here and letting this other man touch her with such familiarity?

  * * * *

  “I was so glad you called, Lance. It’s been far too long since I’ve seen you.” Roxi gave the tall man a hug and kiss on the cheek.

  “I know. We need to keep in better touch.” He helped her with her coat and held her chair for her.

  Pulling off her gloves, she nodded in agreement. “Coffee, please,” she said when the waiter came to take their drink order. “We do. This once-a-year thing just doesn’t cut it anymore.”

  “No, it doesn’t. But, with me moving to Portland, we’ll be much closer than when I was in Maine.”

  “Very true. Thank you,” she said after the drinks arrived. Fixing hers the way she liked it, she stirred it a bit before leaning forward and resting her chin on laced fingers. “So. How are things?”

  As Lance filled her in, she took in his shaggy, unkempt, dark-blond hair, piercing green eyes, and tanned skin. She couldn’t help but appreciate how he looked. But it wasn’t like that between them. Never had been. They were just very good friends. He travelled quite a bit and would call her whenever he got to town.

  “Hey, I was thinking. We need to take a vacation.”

  She sipped some coffee. “Do tell.”

  “Remember when we went to Dubai?”

  She sure did. She’d gone with him as his assistant but really just went for a free vacation. It had been a blast. “Oh yeah. That was a lot of fun.”

  “Well, I have a conference coming up in Sydney, if you’d like to go with me.”

  “Sydney? Oh, I haven’t been there in forever.” She shook her head. “I don’t know, Lance. I just got the promotion, I should probably stick around for a while.”

  He waved it off. “It’s not for a few months.” He leant forward towards her. “Come on, Rox, it’s Australia. And right now it’s summer down there.”

  Oh, that sounded so tempting. Warm sun. Beaches.

  “Come on, what do you say? Want to go to Australia with me?”

  “Yes, Roxi, are you going to go to Australia with him?”

  At the new voice she jerked and turned to find Sam there. No expression on his face but she could see the fury in his body language. Jealousy? From Sam?

  “Sam? What are you doing here?” Her heart pounded. “Is everything okay with Dean?”

  He never looked at her, just continued to stare at Lance. “Shopping for Laila.”

  Shortened sentences and a clipped tone. He wasn’t happy. Lance cleared his throat and she tore her gaze from Sam and met Lance’s.

  “Oh, um, Sam Hoch meet Lance Noble. Lance, this is Sam. He’s here because of Master Guns.”

  “Nice to meet you, Sam. I’m sorry to hear about Dean.”

  “You know Dean?”

  She watched Sam stiffen. Seriously, could the man get any tenser?

  “Yes. Roxi introduced me to him years ago. Wonderful man.”

  Now Sam looked at her and the emotions swirling in his eyes hit her in the gut like a sucker punch. “Nice to meet you. Sorry for interrupting.” He spun on his heel and walked off.

  Licking her lips, she shrugged. “I’m sorry, Lance. Excuse me, please. I’ll be right back.”

  “Go, go. I’ll order your food for you.”

  She dashed out after Sam. The cold bit into her but she didn’t care. She spied him walking off down the sidewalk.

  “Sam,” she called out. “Sam!” Roxi ran after him and grabbed his arm to halt him. “Wait a minute. What the hell is going on here?”

  He peered down at her and frowned. “Where’s your jacket?”

  “Inside.” She waved his question off. “What the hell was that about?”

  He took his off and placed it around her shoulders. Immediately she was swamped by his heady masculine scent and warmth.

  “What about you, Sam?”

  “I don’t mind.”

  “Tell me what’s wrong.” She reached again for his arm and touched it.

  “Nothing. I didn’t mean to interrupt.”

  She bit back her growl of frustration. Why couldn’t he admit he felt something for her? “You weren’t interrupting. Want to join us?”

  “Join you and what? Listen to you make plans to go to Sydney with a man who took you with him to Dubai, Rox?”

  “Is that what this is about? Him asking me to Sydney?”

  “Your business is your business.” The words were forced from behind clenched teeth.

  Fine. If he didn’t want to admit anything she wouldn’t force him. “You’re right.” She removed his jacket and slapped it back at him, hitting him in the chest. “Have a good day, Sam.”

  She was angry. Her steps took her back to the diner where Lance waited. She wasn’t sure if it was the cold or her fury at him making her shake so much. Her lunch companion lifted his brows and leant back in his chair.

  “He’s a hot one.”

  “Really, Lance, that’s what you have to say?”

  “Well, he is.” Sitting forward, he tipped his head to the side. “You two going to be okay?”

  “Why wouldn’t we? Didn’t you see how well that went?”

  “Jealous boyfriend?”

  “He’s not my boyfriend. He’s…”

  A sly grin lifted Lance’s mouth. “Oh, do tell, babe. You’re just hittin’ that?”

  She groaned and dropped her head into her hands. “Think you could say it any louder? Or perhaps cruder?”

  “Of course I can. So you and handsome there are just fucking—”

  Her head jerked up. “Stop it!” Mortification spread along her face as the waiter stood there with the ordered food.

  His wicked grin waited for her, well aware of wh
at she would do. Nothing. “Well, you asked if I could. Just trying to help.”

  “I should hurt you. Really, really hurt you.”

  His green eyes sparkled. “Would you, please. You know what I like.”

  “You are such a pervert.”

  He blinked thick long lashes at her. “But I’m your pervert.”

  “I think I need to trade for another.”

  He just shook his head and laughed. “Okay, seriously. What’s his deal?”

  She released a long breath. “I really don’t know, Lance. There are times when I think he’s jealous but he won’t ever say I mean anything.”

  “Have you told him you’re in love with him?”

  “What? I never said that.”

  “Didn’t have to, babe. I know you well enough. And I have never, and I do mean never, seen you run out after a man. And I bet before this Sam Hoch you never have.”

  Okay, so that may very well be the truth. She’d not ever done that before. “Doesn’t mean I love him.”

  “True. But that look on your face says otherwise.” He took a drink of his coffee. “Look, I didn’t mean to cause any friction between you two. I can talk to him and let him know I’m not a threat to your relationship and that our trips are purely platonic.”

  She shook her head. “No. I don’t owe him any explanations. He’s staying at my house because of Master Guns, but if he’s not willing to say anything about how he feels then I don’t have to say anything either.”

  Lance frowned. “Don’t be so stubborn you lose him forever, Roxanne.”

  She didn’t want to lose him. But damn it all, he had to face his fears and she knew he had them. She’d known that when this had started. That was before I fell in love with him.

  “Enough about Sam. Tell me more about Sydney.”

  * * * *

  She had a leisurely lunch with Lance then drove home. All the while, her mind lingered on Sam and their interaction out in the cold. His truck sat in the drive—perhaps he was over at Laila’s—and she parked next to it as she waited for the garage to open then pulled inside. If it started to rain again, she might as well use the garage. She had one after all.

  The second she stepped through the door, she knew he was in the house. She heard him in the kitchen. Walking in the opposite direction, she made her way to her bedroom. Closing the door, she put down her things and sat on the chair to remove her boots.

  She was tired and really wanted to sleep. But since she was going to be on days starting Monday, she needed to stay awake now and sleep at night. Dropping the second boot to the floor, she sighed and leant back.

  No time to rest now, she still had to get her run in. Groaning, she pushed to her feet and went to grab some running clothes. She’d pulled on her sports bra when the door opened. Tugging her white, quarter-zip running shirt down over her chest, she turned and found him in the doorway.

  He didn’t speak, merely stared at her as she stood there in a shirt, socks and underwear. She arched a brow. “Yes?”

  “Running?”

  She shook out her black running pants then drew them on. “Yep.” Grabbing her shoes, she sat down to tie them. She rolled her shoulders and pulled her hair up into a ponytail before going back to her closet for her jacket and gloves.

  “Are you mad at me?”

  She blew out a breath and stared at him. “Nope. We’ve been over this, Sam. This is just a ‘now’ kind of thing. Lance said he was sorry you didn’t want to stay for lunch, but no, I’m not mad.”

  Well, that was a whopper of a lie. She was pissed off that he wouldn’t tell her he was jealous of her being out with another man. Lance had it right, he wasn’t a threat, and if Sam would ask her, she’d be more than happy to tell him just exactly what Lance was to her. But he didn’t ask and she wasn’t volunteering the information up.

  “Mind some company?”

  Part of her wanted to tell him to stay behind, but honestly, she liked him around. “Sure. I’ll be up in the living room stretching.” She sidled by him, careful not to touch him. That wasn’t easy.

  She waited while he changed and stretched as well, then they strolled outside. She readjusted her 180s earmuffs and watched Sam do the same. Then they took off and began running. He followed her stride and it seemed that they were pretty similarly matched speed wise.

  As they ran, she thought about what had happened earlier and where she truly wanted to think of this going. Could she see long-term with Sam? Yes. But she wouldn’t be in a relationship with a person who couldn’t at least tell her how he felt. She wasn’t going to do that. It wasn’t fun when you had to fight for every single bit of emotion. To her, love shouldn’t be like that.

  It saddened her to think of no longer having him in her life. She may see him if he came to visit Laila but in all the years they’d been neighbours, she’d never seen Sam there. So perhaps when he left it would be for good. She gave herself a mental shake. This is Christmas, Roxi. Think positive.

  She cut her gaze to the man running with fluid energy beside her. She had to get him a gift. What? She didn’t know yet, but she’d find something for him. For some reason, giving him a good Christmas was important to her.

  Some reason my ass. I want to do it because I weep for the boy who never had a good one and cry for the man who is still unwilling to believe that people won’t hurt him.

  She shook her head. He may have had a good Christmas at a foster home. Or perhaps with Laila and her family. But she wanted him to remember her and this one with fondness.

  They didn’t talk at all during the run and when they made it back to the house she was even more exhausted. But this was a good exhaustion—she loved how she felt after a run. They cooled down and showered—separately—before meeting in the living room.

  “I’m making some coffee, would you like some?” she asked, hoping he shared her feeling that a truce had been called between them.

  “Please.”

  “Tell me something about you, Sam,” she blurted out as she added the grounds to the maker.

  “What do you want to know?”

  “If there was one thing you could have for Christmas, what would it be?”

  “Dean healthy.”

  She nodded. “Okay, what else? If he was fine, Laila was fine. What would you want? Something for yourself.”

  He was silent for so long she turned her head to glance at him. A confused look was on his face. “I…I don’t know.”

  “Something for your truck? Your apartment? You know, something other than an endless supply of porn,” she joked, knowing some of the guys had kept a large supply of said materials while deployed.

  He gave her a pointed gaze, which told her he knew what she was doing. “I really don’t have any clue, Roxi, I’m not trying to blow you off, I just never gave it any thought before.”

  She grabbed some decorated sugar cookies and put them on a plate. “Well, think about it.”

  “What about you?”

  “What would I want?”

  He nodded, taking the plate from her and walking to the living room where he placed it on the coffee table. She followed him and sat on the sofa, curling up to face him at the other end.

  “Let me think.”

  He ate a cookie and watched her. “Not so easy, is it?”

  “No. I think another work of art like the one in the hall. If I could have anything. An oil painting of ships like that. I just love them. To see a clipper slicing through the water, they feel so real to me. Perhaps one of those. Of course, gift cards to sports stores are always good, too. That way I never worry about not having my running clothing.”

  “Running clothes?” he teased.

  “Hey, I said a portrait as well.” She gestured at him. “What have you come up with?”

  “Besides the endless supply of porn?”

  She laughed. “Right, of course. Beside that.”

  His blue eyes twinkled and her heart stuttered a bit before resuming a regular pace. He was tea
sing with her and she loved it. Damn, there went that love word again.

  “Gift cards for music or books.”

  “Your porn thought was more exciting.” She leant forward. “Come on, Sam. What do you want?”

  His eyes heated and she felt the answering moisture between her thighs. “Not porn.”

  “I figured that.”

  He licked his lips and she watched him think. “I want a home.”

  “I thought Laila said you had a place. An apartment, right?”

  “I have a house. I want a home.”

  Okay, melting heart here. She wanted to grab him and hold him close. “We all do, Sam.”

  As if he realised he’d imparted such information, he lifted a shoulder in a lazy move. “You know, filled—”

  “With porn.” They finished together.

  She got up to get the coffee and give him a minute to get himself back together. Pouring the freshly brewed liquid, she shook her head. A home. Of course he did. How could she have not seen it?

  Chapter Ten

  Sam rubbed a hand over his head as he exhaled. He hadn’t expected to deliver anything like that to her. His own private wish, want, or desire. Didn’t matter what you called it, a home was what he yearned for more than anything. But it was more than that now. Whenever he thought of a home, it had this woman, Roxi, in the picture with him.

  He really didn’t know how he was going to move on without her in his life. And he didn’t want his relationship with Roxi to be as Laila’s friends, not solely anyway. He rolled his lower lip between his teeth as he sat there, grateful for the moment of solitude she’d given him. He needed to recover.

  Should have stuck to porn. He knew the stories—that being what filled a Marine’s sea bag. It would have been much less personal and he wouldn’t be sitting here feeling like he’d just opened up his heart for her to peer in and see his pain and wounds from childhood.

  He watched her return from the kitchen with a tray holding their drinks. She placed it between them on the coffee table and gave him a smile as she picked her mug up. He searched for any sign of sympathy and found nothing. In fact, her face was devoid of almost anything other than her typical kindness.