Solid Stone: Choices

by E. G. Patrick

  He doesn’t smile, he just stares, watching Greg hand me a drink and put his hand on my arm, leading me to a spot where we can lean against the bar. I stand so that Greg’s back is to Adam. He’s still watching us. Greg asks, “So where are your friends?”

  “Oh, don’t worry about them. I’m just the third wheel tonight. I’m here with my friend and her boyfriend. What about you?”

  “I’m here with a few guys, you know, Friday night out.”

  “Cool. Do you come here a lot?”

  “No, it’s my first time actually. One of my buddies used to come here when he was in uni. Said it was always a good time, so here we are.”

  “Yeah, I used to come here when I was in university once in a while.”

  I hold my breath as I see Adam coming toward us. “Hey, Greg, Violet, are you here with friends or on a date?” He says with a straight face. Greg turns a dark shade of red until Adam says, “I’m kidding. How are you two doing? Can I buy you a drink before I head home?”

  Greg composes himself and looks up at Adam to make eye contact, making me feel sorry for him. “Mr. Stone, Adam, let me buy you a drink?”

  “No, no, I insist. What are you two having?”

  “I’ll have another beer and Violet’s drinking tonic water.”

  Adam smiles, I know his wheels are spinning, but he’s doing really well not showing how fast they’re spinning. “Are you sure you don’t want something stronger?” he says looking right into my eyes.

  “I’m fine, really. I’ll nurse this for a while.” Adam orders a beer for Greg and a beer for himself.

  “Mind if I join you two for a little while, I’m only going home anyway?” Awkward is an understatement. It’s obvious to Adam, and me, that Greg has some interest in me. The poor guy would die a thousand deaths if he knew about Adam and me.

  I play it cool and keep the conversation casual. We talk mostly about work. When I finish my tonic water I put the glass on the bar top, and before either of them can say anything, I say, “Good night, I’m going to say goodbye to my friends and then head home. I have an early start tomorrow.”

  Greg tries to get me to stay. “Are you sure you won’t stay for one more drink?”

  “No thanks. Enjoy the rest of your weekend.” Adam nods and I can feel both men’s eyes follow me as I walk back to the table. Ann’s totally engrossed in Ted and probably assumed Adam and I were up dancing. I quickly tell her we’ve run into a colleague and that I’m planning to leave.

  “Oh shit, is everything all right?” She looks concerned.

  “Yeah, he didn’t see us together and Adam pretended to run into us accidentally. I’ve left him at the bar talking to the poor guy. I’m going to send Adam a text so he knows I’ve left. Sorry, Ann, it’s been fun, but I’ve got to go. Bye Ted.” Ted looks a little buzzed and waves at me.

  “No problem. Bye Vee.” Ann hugs me. I quickly send Adam a text: I’m heading home now. I’ll grab a cab. See you tomorrow? Violet

  I see Adam look down at his phone and then up, trying to find me. I quickly walk past him on purpose.

  Outside, I walk to the corner where there’s a line of cabs. As I’m about to step into a vacant one, I feel a hand touch my arm. When I turn, it’s him, Adam. I have to smile. “I brought you here so I’ll take you home,” he says rather firmly.

  “Okay, fine.” He slides in beside me and tells the driver where we’re going. We drive in silence.

  When we arrive, he tells the driver to wait.

  “Can I come up?” he asks.

  I’d love him to, but I know I shouldn’t. “I’ll see you tomorrow, won’t I, as planned?”

  He gets my meaning. “Yeah, of course. Good night.” He doesn’t try to kiss me, I think he’s annoyed.

  §

  It’s just past eleven as I turn on the evening news and take a big swig of water. My throat hurts when I swallow from having to yell at the bar. I know Adam’s annoyed with Greg. He didn’t say anything but his silence in the cab makes me think he is.

  Asking to come up confused me. If he’s feeling differently then he should just tell me. It would save us both a lot of frustration. How much more of this can I take? That’s a question I can’t seem to answer. Maybe in three months all of this will come to head.

  Chapter 29

  “Adam”

  I’m still annoyed by last night. I feel like a jerk because I can’t stop myself from feeling this way. The weights feel light, but my mind is dark and heavy. She brushed me off. I’ve never been brushed off before. Women usually fling the door open for me, but not Violet, not anymore anyway. She keeps testing me without knowing it. Why can’t I just walk away, why?

  Leaving me because she thought I was fucking around, fuck, fuck, fucking around. I’m incensed! Maybe she’s thinking about dating Greg now? She seemed at ease with him last night, and had no trouble leaving me as the third wheel with Ted and Ann. Me a third wheel? Another fucking first—it’s ridiculous. I pump iron thinking about what I’ll do to her tonight. My thoughts move to more painfully pleasurable things, more pain than pleasure, actually. The choice is mine tonight, I growl in my head.

  §

  The key turns, allowing me to let myself in. She’s in the kitchen, I can hear the faucet going. “Oh, you’re early?” she says, not mentioning anything about me letting myself in.

  I smile, it’s a cold smile, but she doesn’t seem to notice. “I hope you don’t mind,” I say with cool politeness. She’s wearing a light blue T-shirt dress that clings to her curvy body.

  “No, it’s fine. You forgot to send me,” she pauses, looking away, “my choices?” She’s almost embarrassed. That’s better, a glimpse of the old Violet, perfect timing.

  “We’re doing something different tonight, you up for it?”

  She looks me up and down, her eyes can’t lie; she wants me as much I want her. She touches her hair, another tell-tale. “Oh, okay.” She’s waiting for me to take control. You won’t have to wait long babe, Master Adam, is coming for you.

  “Why are you still standing?” I say matter of factly. Watching her kneel makes me hard before her knees hit the ground, but that doesn’t fizzle out my anger, my frustration from last night.

  “What is your purpose?”

  Her soft voice is music to my ears. “To please you, Master.” Her eyes, cast down, add to the effect, making me even harder.

  “Stand up.” I throw her over my shoulders—it seems fitting for what I have in mind tonight. At the top of the stairs I place her in a standing position. “Wait here.”

  It takes a few minutes to set the room the way I want it. A few candles allow for more darkness than light, mirroring my mood. There’s no romantic intent for them this time. I summon her, “Come here.”

  She kneels and I wrap the choker around her neck rather tightly. “Stand please,” I quickly slide the dress up and off her. One flick of my thumb and her bra drops to the floor. “Take off your panties.” She’ll be doing all the bending tonight. Her bowed head makes my chest swell and my cock dance. There’s something different this time, I can feel it. A culmination of some kind; we’ll see.

  I scoop her up, placing her in the center of the bed. My eyes take in every inch of her, from top to bottom. “Put your hands above your head.” I expertly weave black silk around her forearms like intricate artwork, and when pulled tight, force her arms upward as I attached the silk to the solid headboard. My hand grabs one of the pillows, which I place under her upper back. She opens and closes her eyes, wondering, but not questioning, so trusting. Admiring my work, I think if I should press on, my voice hisses in my head……yessss!

  “This is called flip, flop, my choice for tonight.” Her eyes show desire as she nods. “Let me show you.” I flip her body over onto her stomach; her bound forearms allow for easy motion while keeping her body in a straight line. The pillow be
neath her keeps her head up so she can breathe. She grasps the length of the black silk when she’s flopped over onto her back again. “Get it?” She nods again.

  I turn up a classical war song that I used to study to in law school. It kept me alert and made my alpha male juices soar every time; so much so, that I’d usually get laid after a hard night of studying. The heavy drums make me beat my chest in my head. Shirtless, I stand over her. “Open your eyes.” She looks up at me, so vulnerable, but still wanting.

  “Last night you were disrespectful. Do you agree?”

  Her warm brown eyes look into my cold blue ones. “Why?” she says softly.

  I’m going to make her tremble on so many levels. “I’m surprised you need to ask, but I’ll tell you. For starters, leaving me like a third wheel with Ted and Ann while you hung out with Greg. I watched you the entire time just so you know, and then sending me away last night, that didn’t help.”

  Her eyes widen, she’s surprised. “I didn’t want Greg to see us together, that’s why? I thought you’d appreciate that.”

  “Actually I didn’t, and if you appreciated me, you’d know that.” I unbuckle my belt and pull it out from my pant loops. It makes a sharp swish sound as I do.

  I stand over her. “When I left last night I was furious, so much so that even today I can’t shake the feeling. You really got to me Violet.” Yes, I called you Violet!

  She swallows. “I’m not interested in Greg, you must know that.” The darkest part of my core, something I’ve never felt before, rises in me like a volcanic eruption. I hit the bed so hard that it rips the sheet and shakes the bed so that her body bounces. I see fear in her eyes and step back taking a deep breath. What’s happening to me?

  “If you apologize, I’ll forgive you.” I say calmly holding the belt at my side now.

  “For what? I didn’t do anything wrong.”

  She’s pushing me. “A simple, I’m sorry, will do, be respectful.”

  “No,” she says making defiant eye contact.

  I grin, a sardonic grin. She grins back, the audacity given her position. “Shall we begin?” Her defiant stare holds mine as she nods yes! I flip her over and within seconds my belt connects with skin that turns her ass a nice pinkish red. She cries out, and before she catches her breath I administer another one!

  “Ahhh,” she yelps.

  “A simple apology, that’s all it will take.” Her defiant head shakes no! I turn her over and her eyes narrow. She’s challenging me! A battle of wills, really? “Do you want me to stop, you can give in, I’ll understand.” My voice is slow, steady, and calm. It must drive her nuts.

  She shakes her head no! She won’t even answer me now. “Very well.” I flip her onto her stomach and run the belt along the back of her thigh, maybe a little pleasure will soften her up. Goosebumps rise on her skin, becoming more pronounced as I caress the belt down her other thigh. I slide my finger in her and she’s soaking wet, the little vixen. I smile, thankful she can’t see me. Wiggling it, she moans.

  The sound of her slick tight pussy wrapped around my finger forces my cock to twitch. She moans again until my finger is replaced with leather against her skin with an abrupt force. Her pleasurable moans become cries of pain. I step back. I’m breathing heavier now, a combination of carnal desire and frustration. I remind myself how important self-control is right now, more than ever. Without controlling myself, I can’t control her. I stand quietly breathing, composing myself. She remains perfectly still. I flip her over to face me. “Well?”

  There are tears in her eyes. And in disbelief, I watch her blink them away. Her face is serious, maybe even angry, yet she remains eerily calm. “Are you going to say something?” I ask running the back of my hand down her cheek wiping away her tears. Her head moves side to side, another firm no. She’s really testing me. I try a different angle. Leaning down I part her lips with my tongue, she responds as our tongues dance together in perfect harmony. Kissing her is always euphoric, even now under these circumstances. A short reprieve, we both give in to the kiss for a moment anyway. I pull away, her lips torn from mine. “Just say sorry and I’ll make love to you, make you come so badly your insides will burst into flames. You know I can do that.”

  For a split second I see her eyes become warm, loving, and wanting. I’m sure mine changed too, for an instant. And then she turns her face away from me! Another fucking form of insulting defiance and I lose it! I flip her over and lash down hard on her ass cheeks and upper thighs. The cry of anguish is one I’ve never heard before. I watch a welt form, but it’s too late, the second and third ones come crashing down. Pink skin becomes bright, inflamed red, and soft tissue becomes marked.

  “Stop, stop, stop it, please?” She cries out. I drop the belt to the floor and roll her over. The tears stream down her face, she’s crying. I’m frozen, watching uncontrollable wails of pain escape her beautiful lips. Her face is full of pain, pain I caused. I untie her and pull her into my arms, cradling her.

  “I’m sorry, Violet, I’m so sorry.” A deep agonizing pain rips through my entire body. She seems so frail in my arms, so I loosen my grip, afraid of holding her too tight. She looks up into my eyes and I know what she’s going to say next is going to kill me.

  “Get out Adam.” Her warm body leaves a cold spot when she pulls out of my arms, ripping me apart on the inside and out.

  When she turns to open the closet door I see the welts on her delicate skin. She pulls out her pink robe, the one her mother bought her. I cringe as she hides herself from me, protecting her body from me. I can’t blame her. I’m speechless and just stare. She looks so vulnerable, so innocent, so Violet; the Violet I can’t seem to let go of.

  I plead, all pride evaporated in an instant. “Violet, please, let’s talk through this. Please.”

  “Please leave, there’s nothing more to talk about.” She’s composed when she says, “I thought I could do this, be friends, do this,” she points to the bed. “But I can’t, it hurts too much, not just on the outside,” she rubs her behind. “But on the inside, so deep, the wounds are only hidden, but I know they’re there. I need to move on and I can’t with you being so close. You can’t love me the way I want and need.”

  She breathes and her eyes plead with me to understand. “I know it’s my fault we’re like this, but I, I just can’t do it anymore. Each time you come and then leave, it hurts. We’re poisoning each other every time we do this.”

  Poison. It sounds so sinister and evil when she says it. I feel like I’ve been kicked in the nuts. Watching her in so much pain hurries me to get dressed, to give her what she wants, for me to leave. She follows me down the stairs. I grab my car keys from the table and when I turn, I watch another tear roll down her cheek. When I step toward her, she steps back, crossing her arms as if to protect herself from me. My over six-foot-two frame feels two inches tall as I turn and open the door to leave.

  §

  In the underground parking, sheltered by my powerful car, I slide to the ground and cry like a baby. A fucking helpless and hurt baby!

  Chapter 30

  “Violet”

  It’s been two weeks since I’ve seen Adam. Whether he’s traveling or just avoiding me at work, I don’t know. It’s probably best for both of us. I’m suffering in silence just getting through the work day, and then going home to work some more. My days pour into nights until I fall asleep and start all over again. When Paul’s back next week I’m handing in my resignation, and after that I’ll find a new place to live.

  I need to break all ties with Adam. Seeing him will only hurt like hell. My only choice is to move on completely.

  §

  On Wednesday I realize I need to return Ann’s calls. It’ll just be a matter of time before she shows up at my door, worried.

  “Hey Vee,” she’s so cheerful.

  I do my best. “Hey, sorry I’m only calling you b
ack now, works been so busy with the merger. You know how intense they can be. So much detail, all important stuff.”

  “No, it’s fine. I just figured Mr. Stone was occupying more of your time than you’re letting on. I was checking on you, that’s all.”

  “I’m fine.” I’m pretending. “Like I said, I’m just busy.”

  “You sound down, are you sure you’re okay?”

  “Yeah, I’m just tired, long days.”

  She cuts me off. “And long nights, I hope.” She laughs. I force myself to laugh too. “That sounds better.”

  “So anything new?” I ask.

  “No, Ted’s great and, well, I’ve just enrolled to do my masters, remember I was telling you. Teaching in a private school maybe or translating?”

  “That’s great.” I’m so glad to hear good news. “You must be excited, we have to celebrate. You’re making the right choice.”

  “Sure, how’s dinner on Friday night, unless you’re busy with lover boy?”

  “Friday’s great, how about we meet at the Italian place where your professor used to take you?”

  She laughs again, it’s dirty. “Perfect, see you at seven then. Bye Vee, love you.”

  “Love you too. Bye.”

  My fingers move swiftly over the laptop keyboard as I get back to work, the TV’s on in the background. My phone rings, I pick up not looking as I expect it’s Ann calling me back. “Yessss,” I say trying to sound cheerful. There’s no answer. I say hello and still no answer, only breathing and then the line goes dead. I look at my phone and its unknown number. I turn on a few more lights and check the front door is locked, as I arm the alarm. A shiver runs up my spine, even though I tell myself it’s a wrong number and that I’m overreacting.

  §

  Today I tell Paul. I’ve dressed in one of my favorite blue suits feeling very professional. I check my email and remember I have some documents to take over to the real estate team. I’ve tried to avoid Greg, but I’ll say hello today if I run into him. I hand Lucy the documents for a new corporate client, who’s converting a parking lot into condominiums. “Thanks, Violet,” she says. I make my away through the spacious floor and stop at Greg’s cubicle. He’s not there. Taking a better look, I realize his desk is empty. It looks like he’s left? My nerves snap tight like a tightrope, and without another thought I rush to the elevator bank and press forty as the door closes.