Brightest Kind of Darkness

by P. T. Michelle

  The windy gusts had been a problem all practice, but we’d soldiered on, doing our best to compensate for its effect on our accuracy with passes and shots on goal.

  With twenty minutes left in practice, I was surprised when Coach said, “I’m cutting practice short. I know Lainey can’t have visitors today, but if anyone wants to go get flowers and a card, head on out. Who wants to volunteer to collect the gear?”

  “I will,” Renee said.

  “Me, too,” I raised my hand, since I wouldn’t be staying alone. “I’ll put the gear in my trunk until next practice.”

  The rest of the team collectively called out, “Thanks, Coach,” then immediately ran over to gather their bags.

  After everyone took off for their cars, Renee started picking up cones on one side of the field and I headed for the other side. Orange practice cones littered the field, blowing around the open space at the wind’s whim.

  We were almost done when Renee’s boyfriend drove up and honked his horn.

  Renee looked sheepish. “Would you mind finishing up?”

  Tension welled inside me, but I couldn’t live my life in fear. “It’ll only take me a couple more minutes.” I waved her on, and then spent the next five minutes chasing down the last couple of tumbling cones and rolling balls.

  The field lights popped on as I grabbed the net bag. Dragging it over to the goal where Renee and I had dumped all the gear, I began to fill it with the cones and soccer balls.

  When the buffeting wind spun the net bag around, I grumbled and untwisted it. Shoving the cones in, I grabbed a couple of balls and had just dropped them into the mesh, when a bird’s loud cawing drew my attention.

  The sound came from the top of one of the soccer field lights. Squinting, all I could see was the bright light as I called out over the wind, “What is it with you birds and light posts?”

  No sooner had the words left my mouth, then the bird swooped down straight toward me. Ducking to avoid being pegged in the head, I immediately turned and called out, “No, you crazy bird!” It was going to get caught in the goal’s netting.

  At the last second, the bird folded its wings and shot through one of the openings, clearing the net. Breathing a sigh of relief, my gaze snapped to the goal’s base. It was rocking with the wind.

  Heart racing, I glanced to the metal tie downs that normally held it in place. Both sets of ties had uprooted from the moist ground and were covered in grass and mud.

  At that moment, a huge gust of wind whipped across the practice field, wrapping the net bag around my ankles and sending the metal goal over, heading straight for me.

  I tried to dive to clear the goal area, but my cleats caught in the sports bag, sending me tumbling instead. I knew the goal could crush my spine, so I rolled at the last minute and caught the metal post with my hands to keep it from slamming onto my chest.

  The jolt jarred my arms all the way up to my shoulders, but I held the metal pole as long as I could before my muscles began to shake under the weight. Panting, I lowered my elbows to the ground. Wind howled around me as I tried to think of a way to squirm out from underneath it. A rumble of thunder rolled, followed by streaks of lightning veining across the dark sky. Great, another storm’s coming and I was trapped holding a huge lightning rod. “This is just freakin’ fantastic,” I muttered.

  The air turned cooler with the impending storm and my breath began to mist in front of me. My gaze landed on the bag of balls a few inches from my foot and an idea formed. If I could somehow reach the bag without losing my grip on the pole, then maybe I could bend my leg and push some of the balls under the pole, creating a temporary wedge so I could slide out from under the goal.

  I was surprised when a raven landed on the bag of balls. His feathers ruffled in the wind and he didn’t make his usual gronking sound. Instead, he just stared, turning his head this way and that, as if he were surveying the area around us.

  “What do you want?” I snapped, feeling cranky as the cold, wet ground seeped all the way to my bones. “This is all your fault.”

  He hopped off and pecked at the netting, then tilted his shiny dark head and made a low tok-tok noise. Rain started to fall in random fat drops and a cold chill rocked through me. My wrists and forearms began to ache and as I turned my head and groaned, I saw that the bird had inadvertently moved the netting closer to my shoe. Maybe if I talked to him some more, he’d play with the bag again.

  “I guess you helped by flying toward the goal.” The bird bobbed his head, then fluffed his feathers. I grimaced that my plan wasn’t working. “Think you could grab—” I started to say, when the bird pecked at the bag once more. “That’s it…closer to my shoe.” This time, he flapped his wings and lifted the bag’s string, dragging the netting over the top of my shoe before taking flight.

  “Smart bird!” I said and immediately tried to bend my leg to the side, but the rain and my movements made the pole slip in my hands. I grimaced in pain as I rearranged my grip on it once more.

  Making sure that I had the pole secured in my hands, I tried to pull the bag toward me once more, but I must’ve strained too hard because my elbows began to slip in the dewy grass.

  No, no, no, no! I mentally screamed as the heavy goal began to slowly inch its way to my chest. My fingers clawed and my palms scraped against the painted metal, but at this new angle I couldn’t regain my grip.

  Terror rippled through me and I let out a yell as the full weight of the goal pressed on my chest. Heavy. So heavy. Why did it feel heavier now than it did when I was holding it? I wondered hazily as my ability to breathe was slowly pushed out of my lungs.

  Spots floated in front of me and I thought, I’m going to die. Mom, Aunt Sage and Gran’s faces appeared in my mind next. You meant the world to me. I love you all.

  My vision grew fuzzy and I gasped one last raspy breath as Ethan’s face, so intense as he started to say, “I lo—” flitted through my mind. I’m sorry I never told you how much I loved you, Ethan.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  My vision cleared as the soccer goal slammed against the ground. The jarring was so hard I was surprised I didn’t feel the vibrations under my feet.

  “Nara!” Ethan called above the shrieking wind, drawing my attention.

  Ethan saved me? Why didn’t I remember him helping me stand up? I turned to smile at him, but Ethan was on his knees bending over someone. Running to his side, I fell to my knees to see who else was hurt. I froze when I stared at my own face. My green eyes were staring sightlessly at the lightning-streaked sky.

  “Nara.” Ethan looked frantic. He pressed his fingers to my throat, then leaned down to listen to my chest. Rocking back on his heels, he shoved his hands through his hair and anguish rolled across his features. “No, Nara! God, no!”

  “Ethan,” I called out, but he flattened his palms against my chest and pumped, counting. When he moved to pinch my nose and then breathe into my mouth, I waved my hands to get his attention. “Ethan, I’m right here.”

  He kept going. While he pushed on my chest again, fear and anger filled his face. “Don’t you die on me.”

  “I’m here!” I screamed, but he didn’t hear me. That’s when I realized that I saw the wind buffeting his hair and his fleece, but I didn’t feel a thing.

  I glanced down at myself and sat back on my heels, curling my hands into fists. I could see through my fists to my thighs underneath. I really was gone.

  Jerking my gaze back to Ethan, I started to get up and move closer to him, when the sound of hundreds of birds’ flapping wings and loud cawing rose above the wind.

  A bald man, shrouded in a flowing cloak and outlined by a violet blue glow, moved toward us across the soccer field in an unhurried, otherworldly glide. The birds heralded his approach, surrounding the figure completely. Though they never came in contact or prevented the person’s movement, they dove and swirled all around his frame, creating a kind of sketchy outline.

  His eerie presence carried a sense of
finality that sent a chill rippling through me. This, I felt, just as sure as if someone had dumped a cup of ice water down my back. The closer it got, the weaker I felt. Jumping up, I moved to Ethan’s other side. Putting more distance between myself and the unknown man, I instantly felt more like myself again.

  “Do you see him?” I called over the wind to Ethan, but he wasn’t looking directly at the person. He was squinting at the birds, as if he were trying to figure out what they were doing.

  I realized Ethan couldn’t see what I did. The figure wasn’t something he was supposed to see, because it was coming for me.

  Death.

  I tried to grab Ethan’s arm, to shake him and tell him what the birds were trying to show him, but my fingers went right through his bicep.

  Somehow Ethan must’ve figured it out, because formidable fury filled his face. My scalp tingled as energy surged in the stormy air stirring around us. “You can’t have her,” Ethan gritted out as he shoved his hands, palms-outward, toward the birds and figure.

  The pocket of energy rushed away from us at the same time the birds and man flew backward, tumbleweeds at its mercy. I blinked, both amazed and thankful for what he’d done. How had he done that? I wondered, but Ethan was speaking to my unconscious self once more.

  “You can’t be gone,” he said as he began to pump my chest again. The figure had recovered and was moving toward us again at a fast, angry clip.

  Tears streaked Ethan’s cheeks as he tilted my head and prepared to blow air into my lungs once more. “Don’t leave me,” he said desperately. “I love you!” Raw emotion carried on his words as he pressed his lips to mine.

  I coughed and blinked until my blurry vision finally focused.

  Ethan was leaning over me. “Nara? Thank God!” He touched my cheek, elation and relief filling his gaze. “Can you hear me? Say something. How do you feel?”

  My chest ached and my throat felt scratchy, but I cupped my hand over his and rasped, “Thank you.”

  Kissing my forehead, Ethan gently scooped me into his arms. “We need to take you to the hospital. Have you checked out to make sure you’re okay.”

  I pressed close to his warm fleece and shook my head. “I want to go home.” I didn’t want strangers poking and prodding me for hours in a strange hospital bed. I just wanted Ethan.

  “Nara.”

  “Please, Ethan,” I said, making sure my voice sounded strong.

  Ethan sighed and started walking toward the parking lot at a brisk pace. “I got worried while I was waiting at your house,” he said, glancing down at me.

  Cool air blew around us, making me shiver. “The wind kn—knocked the go—goal on me. I could only ho—hold it up for so long.” The cold was starting to get to me and I couldn’t keep my teeth from chattering.

  When he started to bypass the bench, I said, “My so—soccer bag.”

  Ethan tightened his hold on me. “You’re freezing. I’ll put you in my car first and then get your bag and the soccer equipment.”

  “I ca—can’t leave my car here overnight. It might get stripped for parts if I do that.”

  He frowned. “Are you sure you’re okay to drive?”

  I felt a little weak, but it wasn’t very far. “Yeah, I can handle driving two miles.”

  “This insanity will stop,” he said through gritted teeth, his breath expelling in frosty plumes as he stopped to let me grab my soccer bag.

  The rain started coming down the moment he set me next to my car. Ignoring the mud and grass caking my body, I slipped inside and popped my trunk, thankful for the towel I’d thought to lay across my seat before practice started.

  After Ethan had stowed my bag in the trunk, I rolled the window down halfway so I could hear him over the wind. “I’m going back to get the rest of the equipment and then I’ll meet you at your house.”

  Nodding, I blinked against the rain pinging my face with frigid droplets. There was so much I wanted to say to him, but right now wasn’t the time. “I’ll see you in a few minutes.”

  “I’ll be right behind you. This ends tonight.” He tapped my window, telling me to roll it up.

  After Ethan’s parting comment, I really wanted to hear what he had to say about my close call tonight. Had he figured out a way to help me with Fate? Ethan had been right. Fate had every intention of killing me, which it would’ve accomplished, if Ethan hadn’t shown up when he did.

  I ached all over and had never been so glad to see my driveway. Once I started my dirty clothes in the washing machine, I immediately headed for a hot shower.

  Twenty minutes later, dried hair swept up into a ponytail, I came out of my bathroom, tugging a long-sleeved heather green t-shirt down over a tank top and jeans. My chest didn’t hurt as much after my shower, but I had a feeling I would be sore for a while.

  Opening the front door, I used my foot to block it from being blown by the gusting wind and peered through the pouring rain. Ethan sat in my driveway, playing drums on his steering wheel. Bet he was listening to that new band we both liked Cracking Knuckles. I waved him in.

  By the time he came through the front door, his fleece was completely soaked. Beckoning him to follow, I walked through the living room and into the hall, saying over my shoulder, “Take off your wet stuff and we’ll stick them in the dryer.”

  When he set a notebook on the rumbling washing machine, and then tossed his fleece and t-shirt into the dryer, my stomach fluttered. Shutting the door, I turned the machine on low and stretched to reach for a clean hand towel on the rack above my head.

  Ethan’s warmth covered my entire backside as he leaned against me and grabbed the towel. “How are you feeling?” he asked, handing me the towel and then moving back.

  I didn’t want him to treat me like I was going to shatter. “I feel much better now that I’ve had a shower.” Swallowing the giddiness that had surfaced when he pressed against me, I turned and stepped toward him to spread the towel over his head. “You’re soaked,” I said, scrubbing at his wet hair.

  “I’ve never been more scared in my life,” Ethan murmured as he gripped my hips and pulled me close. Sliding his nose along my cheek and into my hair, he inhaled deeply, “Mmm, I love the way you smell. Like sun-warmed air after a spring rain.”

  His sweet comment made my nerves jump and my stomach tense with excitement. Abandoning the hair drying, I tossed the towel on top of the machine behind me, then wrapped my arms around his neck. “Is ‘too good to describe’ a smell?” I asked, snuggling into his warmth.

  Ethan pressed his lips to my forehead, murmuring, “I thought I’d seen your entire practice before the storm woke me.”

  I pressed my face against his jaw. “It’s okay. I’m fine.”

  His arms tightened around me. “No, it’s not. I knew you were coming here straight after practice was over, so I didn’t worry, but then I got another vibe. I’m sorry that I didn’t get there a few minutes earlier.”

  He sounded so upset I pressed my hands to his face. “If it weren’t for you, I’d be dead. Don’t apologize to me.”

  “That was beyond too close, Nara.” He looked tortured as he searched my face. “I don’t know what I’d have done if you hadn’t started breathing again.”

  My chest squeezed at the very real reminder of my brush with death. “What happened?” I asked, setting my hands on his shoulders.

  He blew out a sharp breath. “When I got there you were unconscious. After I moved the goal, I realized you weren’t breathing. I only had minutes to get your heart going again, so I immediately started CPR.” He hesitated for a second, then continued, “It took several tries, but finally you started breathing on your own.”

  I shook my head in amazement. “The last thing I remember before I blacked out was how hard it was to breathe.” I pressed a kiss to his jaw. “Thank you again for saving me.”

  Ethan squeezed my waist, his voice rasping in my ear. “Don’t scare me like that again.”

  “Did anything else happen?” I
hoped he’d tell me how he managed to fight off Death.

  “I didn’t feel Fate, if that’s what you’re asking.” His gaze narrowed. “But I’m sure he was skulking around somewhere. I think I might’ve figured out a way to stop him.”

  Ethan didn’t say a word about what I’d seen while I was dead. Had I dreamed seeing Death coming for me? Did dying somehow allow me to have a normal—read: crazy, out there—dream, since I no longer had a future to dream about?

  Ethan was right. Fate was my biggest problem right now. “If it weren’t for that raven swooping down in front of me, I never would’ve turned and seen the goal falling toward me.”

  “Animals can sense a disturbance in Nature. The bird was probably trying to warn you.” he paused, then asked, “Did you ever hear from your dad?”

  “I don’t know.” Walking into the kitchen, I retrieved my phone from my backpack’s inside pocket. There weren’t any messages. “Not yet.”

  Ethan had followed me and I glanced at the notebook he’d tucked in his hand. “Why did you bring your drawings?”

  He gestured toward the couch. “Let’s sit.”

  Setting my cell phone on the island, I winced at the dull ache in my chest, then walked with him over to the sofa. “How’s the wound on your shoulder?” I asked.

  “All healed.” He turned so I could see. His wound was just a faint pink circle now. I gingerly touched the new skin, then slid my hand across his shoulder to the feather, running my fingers over the tattoo. When he shuddered, I said, “It’s a shame you can’t see this feather up close. It’s so real looking I feel like I could pluck it right off your back.”

  I rose up on my toes and pressed my lips to his skin. I wanted to show him I thought his tattoo was beautiful and not something that freaked me out.

  Exhaling a shaky breath, Ethan turned and sat down quickly on the couch. “Let’s talk before you distract me even more.”