She relaxed. This, at least, she agreed on. “Of course I will. As much as I’m going to miss being in the classroom, I know that being a mother will be my most important job after the baby is here.”
“To be sure. But it is your job now, too, jah? I fear it may be too tiring for ya. Rachel, dear, you need to take care of yourself.”
“Now?” She examined his face. Tried to understand what was going through his mind. Usually, Marcus was easygoing, and he seemed proud of her teaching job.
“Jah, now. Being around all those kinner can make you sick. Or you could be on your feet too much.” Sounding as if he’d just come up with the best idea ever, he said, “It’s much better if you stay around here and rest.”
She shook her head. “Nee, Marcus. I’m going to teach as long as I can.”
“I don’t want to argue with you. And I shouldn’t have to. What I am saying makes sense. Ain’t so?”
Actually, it didn’t make any sense at all. At least not to her. Searching his face, she said, “Marcus, what is going on? Why are you so worried about my health and the baby?” Grasping at straws, she added, “Did something happen to your mother or your sister that I don’t know about? Or . . . or is it about the mill? Are you thinking about the men at the mill?” She knew that he’d been affected by both the fire and the men’s deaths. Yet, while some of the employees hadn’t been shy about admitting how devastating the experience had been, Marcus had always insisted that he had gotten over it.
But maybe that hadn’t been the case?
He moved from her side and got to his feet. “I am not going to talk about the fire.”
“If you are still haunted by the experience, there’s no shame in admitting it.” Reaching out to him, she added, “I would be more than willing to talk about what happened that day.”
“I would never burden you with such things.”
“It wouldn’t be a burden.” Keeping her voice soft, she added, “It would mean that you need me as much as I need you.”
His expression softened slightly. Then he blinked and it became hard once again. “This conversation is over. You can work the rest of the week, but then I expect you to be at home taking care of yourself.”
For the first time since they’d exchanged vows, Rachel didn’t intend to obey her husband. She needed to teach. It made her happy and it made her feel worthy.
Then, there was Lilly. That poor girl had already lost so much and was struggling to fit in. She’d only recently started to lose that haunted look in her eyes. What would happen to the girl if Rachel left? There was no guarantee that Rachel’s replacement would treat Lilly with such care.
That settled it. Her mind was made up.
She had no intention of quitting her job. Somehow, some way, she was simply going to have to change Marcus’s mind.
Chapter 9
Friday, August 28
I still don’t understand why you are walking with me to school, Uncle Jake,” Lilly said when they were about halfway there. “I haven’t done anything wrong.”
Jacob wished Lilly was a little girl again. Or that he’d taken more time to get to know her over the years. Or that he was better with words. If he knew just the right words to say, she might actually want to talk to him about things that mattered to her.
If he’d done all that, then he would feel like he could stop walking and simply give her a hug. The poor thing was always preparing herself for the worst, and it was difficult to watch. Painful, even. It was becoming obvious that after experiencing so many upheavals, she now only expected bad news and disappointment in her future.
That was why he did his best to reassure her yet again. “I told you the truth. I promise, I did. All Mrs. Mast said was that she wanted to speak with me. I told her mornings were best. She said that time was gut because you kinner are busy with your morning routine. That’s all there was to it.”
“I understand the timing. But, Onkle, why did she want to see you today?”
“I don’t know.” Looking down at his niece, who was so obviously on the verge of tears, Jacob reached out and patted her on the back. “All we can do is visit with her like she asked. Surely she’ll answer all our questions then.”
“I hope so.”
“I hope so, too.” He smiled. “Now, let’s try not to bring on problems. We’ll deal with whatever Mrs. Mast has to say when the time comes.”
With visible effort, Lilly regained control and started walking again. She shook her head wryly. “You know, Onkle Jacob, you could have met me at school. You didn’t have to walk with me the whole way.”
“What? You want me to walk by myself?” He raised his eyebrows and tried to look affronted.
His silly expression paid off. Lilly’s lips twitched. “Maybe. Girls my age don’t usually need grown-ups walking them places.”
“That might be so, but I’m new at this, you know. You’re simply gonna have to give me time to learn how to treat teenagers.”
After she pretended to think about his words, her lips twitched again. “I suppose I can do that.”
It took everything Jacob had to not grin or throw his fist in the air. Maybe he’d finally made a breakthrough with her. If it had actually happened, he was going to owe Mrs. Mast a big thank-you.
They were just past the last bend in the road. The white one-room schoolhouse loomed up ahead. Already several children were congregating outside. Some of the younger boys and girls were chasing each other. The oldest boys were standing off to one side talking. One girl was sitting on the steps reading.
And Rebecca Kinsinger was standing with two girls examining something in a textbook.
Just like that, his mind went blank. He couldn’t explain it, but somehow whenever he saw her, he couldn’t think about anything other than his need to get to know her better.
When Lilly started talking to one of the girls nearby, Jake took the opportunity to look at Rebecca, thankful that she couldn’t see how intently he did so.
He supposed she looked like she always did. She had golden hair, light blue eyes, full cheeks. A winsome expression, and a loose, almost athletic build.
She reminded him of some women he’d met in Florida who were swimmers. A group of them spent a summer in one of the condo complexes he’d worked at and he’d gotten to know a couple of them. They’d be leaving for swim practice when he arrived early for work. They’d been tall, like Rebecca was. And they’d walked in such a fluid way, it had made him think that they were very comfortable with their bodies.
That was how Rebecca walked, forceful and assured. There was little hesitancy about her. In the few times their paths had crossed, he’d thought she seemed comfortable around most everyone, actually. He wondered if it was because of her job at the mill. She didn’t have the usual shyness around men that most women seemed to have.
“Onkle Jacob,” Lilly called out as she approached his side again.
“Hmm?” To his surprise, she nudged him with an elbow. It interrupted his thoughts. In confusion, he stared down at her. “What was that for?”
“You’re staring!” Lilly whispered.
He supposed he was. Jacob tilted his head and wondered if Rebecca’s nose freckled in the sun or if it always stayed so flawless and perfect.
“Jacob,” Lilly said a little louder. “You’re staring at Miss Rebecca. She’s gonna notice if you don’t stop soon.”
Quickly, he averted his eyes. “It was that obvious?”
“Kind of.” For the first time all morning, Lilly smiled broadly. “You looked like you were mooning over her.”
That was probably because he was. “Huh. I hope she didn’t notice.”
“I don’t think so. She’s still looking at the history book with Martha. Martha keeps getting the dates of the Civil War mixed up.” She shook her head. “Martha can’t remember anything that doesn’t have to do with her farm. She’s raising goats.”
“Why does she need to know the dates?”
Lilly shrugged. “I d
on’t know. It’s not like any of us Amish girls are ever gonna start telling the corn all about the Battle of Gettysburg.”
“You might,” he teased. “If you thought it might help ya get a better crop.”
In true thirteen-year-old fashion, she rolled her eyes. “I love you, Onkle Jake, but you tell the worst jokes.”
Figuring she might be right, he turned his attention back to Rebecca and Martha. “Martha looks about your age.”
“She is.”
“Then how come she’s studying with Rebecca? Do you have a history test today?”
“Jah.”
“You do? Did you study?”
“I didn’t need to.”
“Of course you do. Studying is important.” He was starting to have a good idea of why Lilly’s teacher wanted to talk to him.
“Unlike Martha, I know the Battle of Gettysburg was in 1863.”
“Huh.” Jake didn’t get much of a chance to ask more questions because they were now in the middle of the playground. A couple of the kids watched them approach.
When Jacob noticed a few teenagers around Lilly’s age look at him curiously, he said, “You don’t have to stay with me, Lilly. Have a good day.”
She practically sighed in relief. “You too, Onkle.” She paused. “Hey, Onkle Jacob?”
“Hmm?”
“If Mrs. Mast tells you something bad, let me know right away, wouldja?”
“I will, honey. Try not to worry, okay?”
After nodding, Lilly turned away and approached a couple of kids her age. Jacob was happy to see that all the kids greeted her with smiles. Maybe she was making friends after all.
Just then the front door of the school opened, and Mrs. Mast came out. She rang a bell and ushered the kids inside.
Instead of going in right away, Rebecca turned to him. “Hi, Jacob.”
“Hi. It’s gut to see you.” There, he sounded completely normal. Not moony at all. “I didn’t know you were going to be volunteering here today.”
Stepping closer, her expression warmed. “Rachel told me that you had a meeting with her this morning. I thought I’d come help her so she wouldn’t keep getting interrupted.”
“That’s nice of ya.”
She looked embarrassed. “It was nothing.”
He disagreed, but he didn’t want to embarrass her further. “So . . . do you know what the meeting is about?”
“I think so.”
Now something bright shone in her blue eyes. It made him feel moderately relieved. Maybe this wasn’t going to be the crisis he had imagined. “Care to share? Worrying about this meeting kept me up all night. Lilly’s worried, too.”
“I’m sorry you couldn’t sleep, but you’re going to have to wait for Rachel to get your answers.”
“Sure?”
“Positive. I don’t want to overstep things, you see.” She smiled.
“Of course not.” He smiled back. And as he did so, it occurred to him then that they were flirting. Nothing too overt or intense, but there was something new flowing between them. Part of him was relieved that the attraction he’d felt for her wasn’t one-sided.
The other part hated the timing. His life was currently a mess. He was in a new place, living with his parents, and attempting to gain the trust of a niece he barely knew.
As they started walking up the stairs into the building, he said, “Listen, before I forget, I wanted to thank your brother for what he said. It’s good to know that I could work at the mill if things don’t work out on the farm.”
“Things still aren’t working out?” she asked gently.
“So far they aren’t. I keep thinking that I’m going to get the hang of farming, but right now it seems like a lost cause.”
“I bet it’s not quite that bad.”
“Nee, it is. The other day I broke the plow.” Though it was embarrassing, he forced himself to continue. “I also put weed killer on some crops and used too much of the wrong type of fertilizer on the vegetable garden.”
Her eyes widened. “You did not.”
“I did. I had no idea that my father favored special fertilizer on his tomatoes. I thought he was going to kill me.”
As he’d hoped, she giggled. “He wouldn’t have done that. But you do sound rather hopeless.”
Lowering his voice, he said, “I canna even believe I’m telling you this, but I hate it, too. I want to learn to be a gut farmer, but it’s a hard road. Every hour seems to pass like it’s two days long.”
“I know the feeling,” she murmured as they walked inside.
Immediately, Jacob felt like he was in the middle of an intricate timepiece. Each of the children seemed to be doing his or her own assignment. They were working separately but in tandem, too. Some were talking quietly with each other, others were working intently on whatever task was at hand.
“Hi, Jacob,” Rachel Mast said as she approached. “It’s good to see ya. Danke for meeting me early this morning.”
Her casualness made him feel even more at ease. “Thanks for allowing me to visit.”
“It wasn’t any trouble. Besides, Rebecca here volunteered to help out.” Looking at her fondly, Rachel said, “She’s been a lifesaver.”
“I’ve been glad to lend a hand,” Rebecca said. “It not only helps you but gives me practice.”
“I’m going to take Jacob outside. Let them have about another ten minutes to do their morning chores, then give the spelling test, okay?”
“Got it,” Rebecca replied as she turned back to the children. “All right, everyone. We all have work to do. Let’s see who can get it done first.”
As Rachel led the way outside, she chuckled.
“Something funny?” Jacob asked.
“Nee. I just can’t help but wonder how Rebecca will be when she gets her own classroom. She reminds me a bit of her bulldog puppy, Oscar.”
Jacob thought that was an odd comparison. “Oh?”
“She approaches things head-on, without any doubts. When she stumbles, she simply gets right up and continues on.”
“I’m beginning to think that is an apt description. She’s seems exuberant.”
“Oh, she is. I’m learning a lot from her.” Looking around, she said, “Let’s go sit over at the picnic table. I promise, I won’t keep you long.”
As they sat down, Jacob realized that he was nervous. Ready to get to the heart of the matter, he looked at her directly. “Mrs. Mast, what did you want to talk with me about?”
She raised her hands as if to calm him down. “It’s nothing bad. Actually, it’s something good.”
Her expression looked the complete opposite of her words. She looked a bit worried. “I would be more reassured if you looked happier about that.”
“I am happy, Jacob. I just . . . Well, I guess I’m procrastinating. I don’t want to say the wrong thing.”
“What is it? Is Lilly making friends?”
“She is. Not a lot, but that’s okay. She’s kind of a quiet girl. My impression is that she doesn’t need or want to be in the middle of every conversation or group.”
“That sounds about right. Lilly is kind of a self-contained sort of person.”
“It takes all kinds of people to make a community, I think. Of course, I am just getting to know her, but my sense is that she’s still grieving and a little bit wary of getting too close to anyone, given her circumstances. That said, she is doing fine socially.”
“So, if it’s not her friends, what is wrong?”
“She’s smart.”
Jacob raised his eyebrows. “Mrs. Mast, I’m still not following you. I’ve always thought being smart was a gut thing.”
She chuckled. “Please, call me Rachel. And being smart is gut. What I’m trying to say is that your Lilly isn’t just bright, she’s really smart. Gifted.”
“Gifted?” He was trying to keep up, but he felt a bit like she was speaking another language.
“At first, I thought that she was simply ahead of us. But whe
n I questioned her about the things she’d been learning in Berlin, they didn’t sound all that different from the curriculum here. So, I talked to her old teacher.”
“Miss Wallace?”
“Yes. I talked to her a couple of days ago. And listening to her answered a lot of questions. She’d noticed how well Lilly read and wrote, too. And how inquisitive she was.” Bracing her hands on the bench on either side of her light blue dress, she added in a dry tone, “And, how skilled she was in math.”
“All of that?”
“Jah.” She chuckled. “I’m not exaggerating, Jacob. Actually, I think Lilly might be the smartest girl I’ve ever taught.”
“That’s gut, right?”
“It’s good for me, but the reason I wanted to talk to you is that I think we need to make sure she gets some extra help.”
Now he was really confused. “Why does Lilly need help if she’s doing so good?”
“Because my job as a teacher is to take her from one place and help guide her toward another.” She sighed. “I love teaching in a one-room schoolhouse. But in some cases, like with Lilly’s, I fear that I am not able to do enough.” Looking determined, she said, “Her success is important to me. I want her to feel secure and happy.”
He wanted those same things. “What do you want to do?”
She bit her lip. “I wanted to talk to you in the hopes that you would, perhaps, allow me to contact some Englishers to tutor her in other subjects.”
“Like who? I don’t know how to even go about such things.” And was that even a good idea? Was that what his brother would have wanted for Lilly? Maybe Marc had never wanted Lilly to be challenged.
“I thought I’d ask at the high school. Sometimes older students will tutor younger kids. Or you could also hire an Englisher tutor. Someone who has had more schooling than me.”
Jacob was at a loss for words. As far as he could tell, Lilly’s dream was to simply be done with school. But was that because she didn’t like learning? Or was it that she’d just become bored.
A Daughter's Dream Page 7
