For Better, For Worse

by June Francis

  Beryl nodded. ‘To Davy, you remember him, don’t you?’

  Grace thought hard and into her mind’s eye came a picture of a young man with curling black hair and brown eyes in a kind face. He had a good physique and was a bricklayer. He was one of four brothers and three sisters, and he and Beryl belonged to a ramblers’ group – that was where they had first met last spring.

  ‘Congratulations,’ Grace said. ‘I hope you’ll be very happy. When’s the wedding?’

  ‘Next June if we can save up enough money and find a place to set up home.’ Beryl paused. ‘I would have liked you to be one of my bridesmaids, but Mam said you will have left for Australia by then because you’ll have had your twenty-first birthday.’

  Grace’s face fell. ‘I’d have liked to have seen you married.’

  ‘Tough luck,’ chipped in Marion, the elder sister. Her cousin always liked to put Grace down, especially in the presence of Dougie, and when Grace had lived with them, she found herself avoiding Marion’s company as much as possible. She could only think it was because Marion resented Dougie taking so much notice of Grace.

  ‘There’ll be photographs,’ Beryl said. ‘I’ll send you and our Dougie one and you’ll have to send us one of your wedding.’

  ‘Of course,’ Grace said, thinking her wedding seemed to feel more like a dream than reality.

  As the heat of the summer faded into the crisp days of autumn, Grace also visited Milly and went for walks with her, taking turns to push the pram to the park at the beginning of September. The heatwave had passed and August had seen several downpours, so the grass in the park was green again, although the leaves on some of the trees were on the change and some had already fallen, creating a rustling brown-and-amber carpet underfoot.

  ‘So, have you seen anything of Simon?’ Grace asked Milly, her curiosity finally getting the better of her.

  ‘Not recently, and now he’s back at school, so Jimmy told me. I think a neighbour looked in on him. I’m sorry that Ben didn’t want you to look after him though.’

  ‘He’s able to walk?’ said Grace, ignoring her friend’s last comment.

  ‘The plaster’s off his wrists and he’s able to use crutches. His cracked kneecap is pretty well knitted together, so he doesn’t need the splint anymore.’

  Grace experienced mixed emotions on hearing this news, glad that Simon was so much better, but hurt that Ben had not informed them of the fact. She tried to hide her feelings, but that night while she was eating tea with her father, she couldn’t help telling him what Milly had said, and was unable to keep the hurt out of her voice.

  Norman gave her a long, thoughtful look. ‘Maybe it’s just as well we don’t have too much to do with them,’ he said gently. ‘The boy needs to play with those his own age, and you’ll be joining Dougie in Australia in no time at all once Christmas is past. Best you don’t get too fond of Ben and take an interest in his affairs.’

  Grace could not believe her ears and she placed her knife and fork down with a clatter. ‘Why on earth should you think there’s a likelihood of me getting fond of him?’

  ‘You talk to each other and you want to help him with Simon.’

  ‘That doesn’t mean anything,’ Grace said fiercely. ‘Besides, he doesn’t like me interfering – doesn’t trust me – he doesn’t even like me, otherwise why would he have stayed away so long. He knows about Dougie and my going to Australia!’

  Norman looked down at his plate for a moment and carefully cut a forkful of his mutton chop. ‘You’ve got him all confused.’

  ‘I don’t understand what you mean, Dad,’ she said.

  ‘Ben finds you attractive. I’ve seen the way he looks at you, so I think he’s decided to put some distance between the pair of you, so not to stand on Dougie’s toes, like.’

  ‘You’re imagining it,’ she said, even so she felt all of a quiver, wondering if her father was right. She was convinced that Ben had taken against her for some reason, which was why he had stayed away for so long.

  ‘Please yerself, lass,’ mumbled Norman through a mouthful of meat. ‘Anyway, isn’t it time you were hearing from Dougie again?’

  ‘I’ll visit Aunt Polly and see if she has any news of him,’ Grace said.

  ‘You do that,’ said her father, leaning over and switching on the wireless.

  Still feeling a little unsettled by her father’s comments, Grace planned to go and see her aunt that evening, but decided she would take the tram part of the way there and back.

  * * *

  She arrived at her aunt’s house at eight o’clock and found her uncle Douglas in the house on his own. This did not often happen; she did not know him very well as her aunt always took charge of the conversation. He welcomed her warmly, and made her a cup of tea and offered her a biscuit before telling her that Polly had gone to the pictures with a friend to see Evelyn Laye in the musical Evensong.

  Grace told him that she had come to see if they had heard from their son recently. Douglas nodded his greying head.

  ‘We received a wire from him telling us that he landed in Cape Town a week ago and had decided to stay on in South Africa with some friends he had made on the ship.’ Grace, stunned, stared at him wordlessly. ‘I know it’s a shock, isn’t it?’ he said.

  ‘What about Australia?’ she said eventually.

  ‘That’s what I said to Polly.’

  ‘And what did she say?’

  ‘She didn’t say anything for ages,’ he replied. ‘Not until I said, “What’s the fool up to now changing his mind like that, and what will Grace say?”’

  Grace, suddenly furious, said, ‘What’s he thinking of sending a telegram that tells you very little, and cost more than a postage stamp, and not getting in touch with me?’

  ‘He didn’t even give an address to write to,’ said her uncle.

  ‘Can I see the wire? Can I take it home with me to show Dad?’ Grace stood up and quickly put her jacket back on and her hat.

  ‘I’ll come with you,’ Douglas said. ‘I’ll take you home on my motorbike. I haven’t seen your dad for ages. I’ll just leave a note for Polly.’

  Within half an hour Grace was sitting on the pillion seat of her uncle’s motorbike and they were speeding in the direction of Kensington. She arrived home to find Norman on the front step talking to their next-door neighbour. He stared at them, and removed his pipe from his mouth, as he watched his brother-in-law help Grace down from the bike.

  ‘So, what’s all this about?’ he asked. ‘Has something happened to Dougie? Surely the ship hasn’t sunk or been attacked by pirates?’

  ‘This is what’s happened?’ said Grace angrily, waving the telegram under his nose.

  Norman grabbed it from her and read it aloud twice, but continued to stare at it for longer. ‘I see it was sent from Jo’burg.’

  ‘Jo’burg? What do you mean, Dad?’ asked Grace.

  Norman smiled grimly. ‘No doubt he’ll be writing to you telling you all about it soon. Let’s go inside and have a drink. I’m parched.’ Grace thought that he continued to mutter under his breath, but couldn’t be sure, ‘Sounds like the boy’s up to his old tricks…’

  The neighbour had already gone inside his house, so the three of them went indoors. Norman poured out three shandies, and the two men sat down in the kitchen while Grace made some cheese sandwiches.

  Once she was seated at the table with them, Norman explained further, ‘Jo’burg is short for Johannesburg – it’s a city in South Africa where gold and diamonds are mined. But Dougie’s ship docked in Cape Town, so he must have left Cape Town for some reason.’

  ‘Looks like my son has gone there hoping to make his fortune, like many another did in the last century when they rushed off to America or Australia,’ said Dougie’s father.

  ‘He’d be out of luck trying to stake a claim in South Africa. It’s not the same,’ said Norman. ‘If you want to know more, borrow a book from the library.’

  Grace resolved to do just tha
t once she received Dougie’s letter explaining everything. After all, her father could be mistaken and she didn’t want to jump to conclusion, although she felt uneasy about it, as Dougie could change his mind about things so quickly. Maybe he had gambled his money away on the ship playing cards and now he owed these new so-called friends money and they were destined for South Africa and had told him if he stuck with them he could get rich quick. It wouldn’t be the first time he had borrowed money which had led to him getting beaten up. Then borrowing money from herself, and his mother lending him money to save him from another beating. That was the situation the last time she had lent him money because he had never paid her back.

  It was to be October, several weeks later, before Grace received a letter and a postcard of Cape Town from Dougie. The wait had been agonising, as Grace fretted daily about what might have happened. But when she opened Dougie’s long-awaited letter, it offered little in the way of explanation. There was no writing on the postcard, but the letter was two pages long, and told her that he had spent some time in South Africa, but would soon be taking the next ship to Australia, where he hoped to do some business that would enable him to buy a plot of land in Sydney and have a house built, as well as send for her shortly. Dougie claimed he could not wait to see her, as Marion had written to him about Grace having been seen with another fellow at some play. He had closed the letter by saying that she was not to forget that she belonged to him and he didn’t want to look a fool in front of the neighbours. Grace felt a strong spurt of anger as she re-read the last paragraph. How dare he speak of her as if she was a possession? She remembered how he had enjoyed showing her off when she was sixteen and she had developed a good figure and her features were no longer so girlish. He hadn’t asked how she was in the letter, or how her father was keeping. Typical Dougie, concerned with how things might look to others, without a thought for how she might be doing without him all these weeks. She read the letter to her father that evening, when he returned from another overnight session on the dredgers, to see if he could make better sense of it.

  ‘He makes no mention of Jo’burg or mining,’ said Norman, gazing at her.

  ‘Probably he presumes his mother told me about his telegram,’ Grace said. ‘Do you think he did make some money mining then?’

  ‘He’s made some money somehow if he’s going to have a house built, and what’s this business he mentions, I wonder?’ rasped Norman, frowning. ‘And he doesn’t explain why he left Cape Town originally. There’s something not quite right here. Somehow, I did think he’d have spent longer in South Africa. Perhaps things are unsettled there since the Boer Wars.’

  ‘But they were over ages ago,’ said Grace.

  Norman said, ‘Where’s the envelope this came in?’

  ‘I put it on the fire. Anyway, he only has himself to blame if I was going out with someone else!’ she raged. ‘I’ve a good mind to write back and tell him I’ve changed my mind about joining him in Australia,’ she added, pressing her lips firmly together. ‘…only I don’t have an address!’

  ‘That would suit me,’ said Norman. ‘I haven’t been feeling too good lately.’

  ‘What’s wrong, Dad?’ she asked, suddenly fearful. ‘I have noticed you getting up in the night several times.’

  ‘You’re not to worry about me,’ he said. ‘I wouldn’t have mentioned it if it wasn’t for Dougie’s letter, and you sounding like you’d quite like an excuse to put off going to Australia for a bit longer until you’re sure of your feelings, and from what you said the other time when we talked about it.’

  ‘Have you been to see the doctor, Dad?’ Grace could not conceal her concern.

  ‘It’ll cost money,’ he protested.

  ‘We can cut down on food,’ she said.

  ‘I like me food,’ he said.

  ‘You won’t starve.’

  ‘Oh well, if it’ll make you feel better, I’ll go,’ he said resignedly.

  ‘That’s a good daddy.’ She kissed his cheek. ‘It’s probably nothing to worry about. He’ll give you a tonic and you’ll soon start feeling better.’

  Norman seized her hand. ‘You’re a good lass. Far too good for your cousin,’ he added darkly.

  She eyed him suspiciously. ‘You’re not having me on, are you, Dad?’

  ‘You mean to keep you here?’ He lowered his head and gazed at the floor and the rag rug that his wife had laboured over before she died. ‘No, lass, I wouldn’t do that. I want you to come to your own decision about this.’

  ‘And you’ll tell me the truth about what the doctor says?’

  He nodded.

  ‘Cross yer heart,’ she said earnestly.

  Norman sketched a shaky cross in the region of his heart.

  She heaved a sigh and changed the subject. ‘Do I go to Aunt Polly’s and tell her about the letter?’

  ‘That’s up to you. I should think he’s written to her as well.’

  ‘I might leave it for a week then. I don’t know why she can’t come and visit us for a change. She could come over on the motorbike, just like I did.’

  ‘She hates the motorbike, used to be for ever nagging Douglas to get rid of it,’ said Norman. ‘But give him his due, he’s stuck to his guns and kept it. He loves that machine and knows what he’s doing. He’s raced in the Isle of Man and during the last war he was a dispatch rider.’

  ‘I didn’t know that. She probably worries about him having an accident now he’s getting on.’ Grace relived those moments riding pillion when Douglas was travelling really fast.

  ‘I think it’s more that she worried that young Dougie might decide he wanted a motorbike too, like his dad.’ Norman yawned.

  ‘Would you like a cup of cocoa, Dad, before going to bed?’

  ‘Better not, I’ll be up in the night more than ever if I do,’ he said. ‘Don’t let me stop you having one, lass.’

  ‘Thanks, Dad, goodnight. God bless,’ said Grace as she went into the back kitchen to fetch the tin of Bournville cocoa.

  * * *

  The following evening, Grace was crossing West Derby Road with Fergie on the lead, when she heard her name being called. She waited until she reached the pavement on the other side, before looking about her. Then she felt a tap on her back and Fergie let out a welcoming yelp. She turned and saw Simon grinning at her. She beamed at him.

  ‘Look at you now,’ she said, noticing that the crutches had gone, as well as the splint and plaster casts. ‘I bet you’re feeling good.’

  ‘It’s great! I can play footie now and help Dad out at home. How are you, Grace, and how’s your dad?’

  ‘I’m fine, although my dad isn’t well, so he’s going to see the doctor.’ She paused. ‘We miss you, so why don’t you drop round and see us sometime?’

  ‘I’d like to do that,’ Simon said, bending to stroke Fergie.

  ‘And your dad doesn’t have to come if he has something better to do,’ she said.

  Simon nodded. ‘Tarrah!’ he called as he set off with a run that Grace was glad to see.

  She wondered if she had really needed to have said what she did about his dad. It sounded unfriendly. She could have said that his dad was welcome to come too. After all, her father would have enjoyed talking to Ben.

  When she arrived home, she was expecting to find her father already there as he wasn’t due at work that night, but the house was empty. She wondered if he had managed to see the doctor. There was no appointment system and you just had to go along and wait to be seen, so it might be taking a while. But when Norman had still not arrived home an hour later, Grace could feel herself becoming more and more worked up.

  She paced the floor, before giving herself a stern talking to and busied herself making something to eat should her dad arrive home hungry. A few minutes later, thankfully, she heard a key in the latch and hurried out of the kitchen to greet her father. Despite his smile, she knew it was bad news as soon as she saw him.

  ‘You’re late,’ she said.

&nbs
p; ‘I was one of the last to be seen and then on the way home I got talking to a couple of people.’ He brushed past her and hurried up the lobby. She followed him and watched as he sank wearily into a chair.

  ‘I met Simon,’ she said. ‘He looks great. But never mind that now, what did the doctor have to say?’

  ‘He wants me to go and see a specialist at the Royal Infirmary in Pembroke Place.’

  Grace felt the colour drain from her face. ‘It’s something serious, then?’

  ‘Might be or it might not that’s why he wants me to see the specialist,’ Norman said, stroking his chin. ‘Make us a cuppa, lass, and something to eat?’

  Grace didn’t say another word, but arranged the corned beef hash that she’d made on a tray for him, along with a bottle of HP sauce and a strong cup of tea.

  ‘Did he tell you anything at all?’ she asked as she handed it over.

  ‘I’d rather not talk about it,’ he said.

  ‘But, Dad, I need to know!’

  ‘You don’t need to know all the ins and outs,’ he said wearily. ‘Let’s wait and see what the specialist has to say.’

  Grace was not satisfied, but knew better than to push her father further – she would have to accept what he had said for now. So, she finished eating her meal, and then switched on the wireless, before picking up her mending basket and proceeding to darn her father’s socks, all the while praying fervently.

  Chapter 10

  Simon dropped by the following evening, and told Grace and Norman that Ben was working overtime, adding that his father hardly ever had the chance to earn extra money. As the job was urgent, Ben had gratefully accepted the opportunity, despite meaning that Simon would be on his own for longer after school.

  ‘I left him a note saying I was visiting you, so he won’t worry about where I am,’ he concluded.

  ‘We’re pleased to see you, it’s been a while,’ said Norman. ‘And is that the tiddlywinks game you have under your arm?’ The boy nodded.

  ‘I’ll be able to play now,’ he said, placing the box on the table. ‘I got bored at home sometimes. Mrs Jones next door would look in on me and make me drinks and bring me sausage rolls from the bakery and she’d natter on about her daughter getting married. Then sometimes her husband would keep me company. He works nights as a cocky watchman, where some new houses are being built and electricity is being put in. He talks about having to chase youths and tramps away from his brassiere now the nights are getting colder because he wouldn’t put it past them to pinch stuff, but what he really likes to talk about is darts.’ He paused for breath. ‘He goes on about how many double tops he’s scored. He also likes fishing in the canal and catches enormous fish. I think he exaggerates. I much prefer being left alone to read the comics that the twins’ dad sends me.’ He paused. ‘I know I must sound ungrateful about Mr and Mrs Jones, but Dad says they mean well and I must be polite and always thank them.’